Phoebe's Songs, a friends fanfic

Disclaimer- I don't own Friends, der.

A/N : I just thought I'd add these as a bit of fun, coz I love Phoebe's songs and found them on my comp, so I thought, "Why not" Enjoy

Phoebe's Songs.

(By Phebe Buffay from Friends)

The Barn Yard Animals Song

Oh the Cow in the Meadow goes Moo

Then the Farmer hits em on the head

And grinds em up and that's how we get Hamburgers.

Now Chickens...

The Bisexual Song

Sometimes men love women,

And sometimes men love men,

Then there are Bisexuals,

But some say they're just kidding them selves...

Lalalalala Lalalalala La

Grandma

Now Grandma's a person that everyone likes

She brought you a train

And a bright shiny bike

But lately she hasn't been coming to dinner

And last time you her she looked so much thinner.

Now your mum and dad said she moved to Peru

But the truth is she died

And some day you will to.

Lalalalalalalala la

Sticky Shoe

My Favourite shoes, so good to Me.

I wear them everyday

Down in the heal, holes in the Toe.

I don't care what People say.

My Feet's best friend, pals to the end.

With them I'm one hot chicky.

But late one night, in not much light,

I stepped in something icky.

Sticky Shoes, Sticky Shoes,

Always make me Smile

Sticky Shoes, Sticky Shoes,

Next time I'll,

Avoid the, Pile!

Other version of Sicky Shoes

My sticky shoes

My stickey

Stickey shooes

Why you stick on me?

Baaybe…

Lesley

Jingle Bitch screwed me over

Go to Hell Jingle Whore

Go to Hell, go to Hell, go to Hell…..

Ode to Pubic Hair

Found you in my Bed, How'd you wind up there?

You are a mystery,

Little Black curly hair, Little black curly hair,

Little Black, Little Black,

Little Black curly hair.

The Snow Man Song

I made a man of with eyes of coal

And a smile so bewitchin'.

How was I supposed to know

My mom was dead in the Kitchen.

Lalala Lala Lalalala

Happy Holidays

Went to a store

Sat on Santa's lap

Asked him to bring my friend all kindsa crap

He said all u need is to write them a song

They havn't heard it yet, so don't try to sing along.

No don't sing along!

Monica, Monica, Have a happy Haunika.

Saw Santa Claus, he said hello to Ross.

And please tell Joey, christmas will be Snowy.

And Rachel and Chandler, hamahuangladular.

Happy Holidays everyone.

Two of Them Kissed Last Night

And this guy lets call him Neil

Now I cant stress this point too clearly

This story isnt real

(short period of time)

Now our Neil must decide

Who will be the girl that he casts aside?

Will Betty be the one who he loves truly?

Or will it be the one who we'll call……Lulie?

He must decide

Even though I made him up

He must deciiiide

Smelly Cat

Smelly cat, smelly cat

What are they feeding you?

Smelly cat, smelly cat

It's not your fault.

They won't take you to the vet

You're obviously not their favorite pet

You may not be a bed of roses

And you're no friend to those with noses.

Smelly cat, smelly cat

It's not your fault.

The Shower Song

Im in the shower

And im writing a song

Stop me if you've heard it!

My skin is soapy

And my hair is wet

And tegren spelled bakwards is nerget

And lather-rinse-repeat

As needed.

New York City

New York City has no power

And the milk is getting sour

But for me it is not scary

Coz I stay away from dairy…..

Chandler and Monicas Welcoming Song

When I first met Chandler

I thought he was gay

But here I am singing

On his wedding day!

My wedding

When I have my wedding

I know who won't be asked to sing

Somebody named Geller

And somebody else named Bing!

They Thought She Would Leave

They thought she would leave

But she just stayed and stayed

That's right

Im here all night

And Chandler will never get lai……

After Chandler cuts Phoebe off with $1 to play at his and Monicas wedding she sings the following song

Who will perform the ceremony? Who will perform the ceremony?

Heart attacks

It doesn't take two heart attacks

Too finally make you see

The first one won't do it

But the second one will sat you free !