While I'm still fleshing out the next chapters for my current story, an idea came to mind. I really hate that annoying crush that Clyde has on Lori. I mean, seriously, there is no humor in it and the nosebleeds are disgusting. This is the first story of The Loud House: Half Dozen Collection. What if Bobby didn't necessarily like how Clyde hits on Lori. And to rid of any controversy, Clyde will be aged up to 16 and Bobby will be aged up to 22. Warning: A very justified ass whooping is included. Read with caution. Read, follow, and review please.
The time was 9:00 PM. Bobby locked up the bodega after another successful day of business. He walks back to his apartment complex, but not before tossing a piece of salmon into a dark alley. Almost immediately, a gang of stray black cats run into the alley. Bobby takes advantage of this and runs into the complex. While he is outside, he decides to check his mail. He pulls out the mail key and opens his mailbox, pulling out several letters, before closing it back and continuing to walk home.
As he flips through the letters, he sees one with hearts on it. Bobby looks and reads that the sender is Clyde McBride. His blood begins to boil. "That little punk is at it again." Bobby seethed. "I swear, I just wanna kick his ass already." Bobby stomps home. He walks into his apartment and slams the door. Lori walks into the living room. "Hey Boo-Boo bear, I was just finishing dinner." Lori says. She tries to hug Bobby, but he just shoves Lori off. "What's wrong now? Stressful day at work?" Lori asked confused. Bobby drops Clyde's letter onto the coffee table.
"Clyde. That's what wrong. I am sick of that little geek sending these damn letters." Bobby responded. He tries to continue, but Lori's phone begins to ring. She pulls it out of her pocket and answers it. "Hello." Lori said. Her expression turns into an angry one when the person on the phone responds. "Will you quit calling my phone? I am in a happy relationship and I will not nor ever be interested. Now leave me alone." Lori shouted. Bobby takes the phone out of Lori's hand.
"LISTEN TO ME AND LISTEN TO ME GOOD, IF YOU EVER CALL THIS NUMBER AGAIN OR SHOW UP AT MY GIRLFRIEND'S PLACE OF WORK AGAIN, I'LL BEAT YOUR LITTLE SCRAWNY ASS TO 8 MILE AND BACK, GOT IT?" Bobby yelled into the phone. Unfortunately, Clyde hung up before Bobby got his hands on the phone. Bobby hands Lori her phone back. "Sorry you had to hear that babe." Bobby said. Lori places a hand on his shoulder, "It's okay. He needed to hear that." Lori responded. The two of them sit onto the couch.
"The bastard hung up before I could threaten him." Bobby said dryly. He rubs his temples in circles with his fingers. An idea pops into Lori's head. "Bobby, I know how to get rid of him." Lori says. She whispers something into Bobby's ear. A wide smile forms on his face. He gives Lori a quick kiss on the cheek. "That's a wonderful idea." Bobby replied.
"I knew you would love it " Lori says cheerfully. "Let's iron out the details over dinner." Bobby and Lori walk into the kitchen. Lori takes two plates out of the microwave. She removes the foil off of the plate, revealing a thick slice of Lasagna and two pieces of garlic bread. She hands Bobby his plate and begins to explain the plan as they eat.
The Next Day
Lincoln and Clyde are driving into the city. Lincoln parks at the diner where Lori works at. "You up for some lunch Clyde?" Lincoln asked. Clyde nodded and the two teenagers walk into the diner. (Temporary author's note: Lincoln and Ronnie Anne are also aged up to 16. She will appear later.) Lincoln and Clyde take a seat at a nearby booth. They notice that Bobby and Lori are arguing in the kitchen. "What do you mean it's cute?" Bobby yelled. "Those letters are getting on my nerves."
"Bobby please, calm down." Lori tried to reason.
"I'm not calming shit down. Either tell him to stop sending those letters or we're done." Bobby yelled before walking out of the kitchen. Lori runs after him. "Bobby wait." Lori yelled after him, but he ran out. She sees Lincoln and Clyde and walks to the table. "Hello Lincoln. Clyde. May I take your orders?" Lori asked.
"I'll have two cheeseburgers and a milkshake. Vanilla milkshake." Lincoln replied. Lori wrote it onto the notepad. Clyde just stared at Lori. The plan came to mind and so far, it's working. "You know what, Lincoln, why don't you take your food ad share it with Ronnie Anne. She lives just down the street. I'll give you another milkshake. On me." Lori asked.
"Alright." Lincoln said. He places a twenty onto the table and Lori brings Lincoln his food in a to go box. Lincoln thanked Lori for the food and walked out. Lori takes a seat next to Clyde. She flashes him a sad look. "You alright Lori?" Clyde asked.
"Yeah. I just wished Bobby would understand. Say, do you wanna come over to the apartment.?" Lori asked. Excitement filled Clyde's body. I knew she'd come around. Clyde thought. What he doesn't know is that he couldn't have thought any more wrong. Clyde nods his head. Lori takes his hand and walks him towards the exit of the diner. Clyde walks out. Lori goes to follow her, but she is stopped when someone taps her on the arm. She turns around and sees an old woman. "Not being rude young lady, but that was some of the worst acting I have ever seen. And I seen the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie back in 1990." The old lady says.
Lori just ignores the comment and walks out after Clyde. Back at the apartment complex, Ronnie Anne and Lincoln are finishing their burgers. "So, what brought you back into the city Lame-O?" Ronnie Anne asked, taking a sip of the milkshake.
"Lori asked me to drive over here with Clyde. She didn't tell me why." Lincoln responded, taking the last bite of his cheeseburger. "So what's up with you?"
"Nothing much. I missed you though." Ronnie Anne replied while placing a hand on his shoulder. "Also, Bobby was supposed to take me to the skating rink, but he didn't show. It's kinda suspicious." Lincoln began to think about it as well. Lincoln gets a text on his phone. It came from Clyde and it read: I'm totally about to hook up with Lori. Wish me luck. Lincoln continued to think and came to a realization. "Oh my God, I gotta save Clyde." he rushes to the door, but Ronnie Anne stopped him.
"Forget about him. I wanna show you how much I missed you." Ronnie Anne says. She leads him into her room and locks the door. "I'm so glad that my whole family is out right now." Ronnie Anne states. Meanwhile, Lori leads Clyde into the candle lit apartment. A plate of chocolate covered strawberries sit on the coffee table in the living room. "Alright Clyde, we are here. Take off your clothes and we'll start." Lori says.
Clyde kicks off his shoes and pulls off his shirt, all while Lori is watching. She grabs a strawberry and takes a bite. Clyde nervously reaches for his pants. "Come on. Take off your pants." Lori demanded. Clyde unzips his pants and steps out of them before kicking them to the side. Lori barely held her laughter in. Oh my goodness, Ace Savvy underwear. Dude, grow up. Lori walks up behind him and begins to rub up his chest. She nips at his earlobe and whispers into his ear.
"Eres un tonto." she whispered in Spanish. Clyde's member begins to erect. "That sounded hot. What does that mean?" Clyde asked with apparent lust in his voice. Lori smiled at him amd whispered, "It means: You're a fool." Lori responded. Clyde's smile quickly turns into a frown. The living room light swithces on. Bobby is standing in front of the living room door. He is glaring daggers into Clyde. A feeling of unease takes over Clyde's body.
"I don't swing that way Bobby. Uh, I'll just let myself out now." Clyde said. He tries to run for the door, but Bobby catches him and slings him into the couch. "Get him Bobby." Lori yelled. Bobby pounces Clyde like a hungry puma and begins to wail on him. Bobby lands several stiff punches on Clyde's pigeon chest. Ugly purple bruises begin to form on Clyde's skin. Bobby grabs him and slams him through the coffee table. The table splits in two and one of the candles light Clyde's boxers on fire.
Clyde rolls around, screaming in pain. He manages to put the fire out, but ugly burns are left on his lower back and part of his buttocks. He tries to crawl away, but Bobby picks him up. "Where do you think you're going?" Bobby screamed. "I ain't finished with you yet. I ain't finished by a long shot." Bobby drags him into the bathroom and switches the light on. He lugs Clyde towards the toilet and dunked Clyde's head in. Clyde kicks and tries to regain his breath. Bobby pulls Clyde's head out and drags him back into the living room.
Clyde once again tries to crawl away, but Bobby stops him by stomping on his back, leaving several bruises on Clyde's back. Clyde pulls himself up, only to be met with a sharp kick to the gut. All of the air leaves his lungs. Bobby picks him up and holds him in a full nelson. "Wanna get a hit in Lori?" he asked. Lori walke up and connects a hard slap across Clyde's face, leaving behind a noticeable hand print. Bobby drops him to the floor.
"BOBBY IS THE ONLY MAN THAT CAN HAVE ME!" Lori yelled. Bobby grabs a lamp as Clyde struggles to stand up. Rage once again fills Bobby. He grabs the back of Clyde's head. "LORI ES MI MUJER!" Bobby yelled in Spanish before breaking the lamp over Clyde's head. Clyde falls unconscious. Lori applauds Bobby and kisses him on the lips. "Good job Boo-Boo bear."
"Nice plan babe." Bobby responded. He grabbed one of Clyde's hands and drags his unconscious body outside onto the porch. Bobby leaves him there and walks back inside. Lori opens the door and tosses out Clyde's clothes, glasses, and phone. At that moment, Clyde's phone began to ring. After a few rings, it goes to voicemail. A message is played and it came from Lincoln.
"Clyde, you gotta get out of there. Bobby is gonna kick your ass. I would've told you earlier, but it slipped my mind. In other news, I fucked the shit out of Ronnie Anne. God, it felt so fucking good. She was begging for my dick and I gave it to her. I gave it to her real good. She was calling me Papi and everything. But seriously, Bobby is gonna kick your ass. Gotta go. Ronnie Anne wants this dick again." Lincoln comments.
A second voicemail is played. This time, it came from Ronnie Anne. "Don't believe anything Lincoln told you. He was begging me to suck his dick. He's really big though. Well, I gotta go. Lame-O and I are going for round two. OH SHIT, Lincoln, warn me before you ram into me like that." Ronnie Anne said.
Well, that's story number one. I got five more in this half dozen. I almost forgot to mention, this story is gonna be all fight scenes, so leave your ideas in the reviews. Please and thank you.