Title:Contact
Rating: T
Pairing/Character: Kon/Yuzu... mentions of Ichigo!Kon/Yuzu
Summary: Kon wondered when she had stopped being a flat-chested girl and had started getting... those.
Warnings: PURE CRACK.
Disclaimer: Bleach © Kubo Tite
Notes: For Silvery, who is amazing for writing the cracktastic Shukaku/Sakura and for liking the idea of Yuzu's new boobs.
Kon wasn't sure when this situation had begun. There were the days when he would inhabit the lion plushie and be prone to mistreating – that stupid jerk sewing his stupid Quincy cross on his head! – and there were the days when he was in control over Ichigo's body while the boy was away being a Shinigami. And then there were the days Nee-san would come and everything was Just Fine With Him.
And then Kurosaki Yuzu had turned fifteen. And her hair was just a bit longer and she was just a bit taller and Kon decided he really wouldn't mind snuggling up to those melons. She was no Orihime, and she was no Matsumoto, but he couldn't help but notice she was growing up when she was hugging him towards her after adding those embarrassing dresses to his wardrobe and squealing about how adorable he looked.
"Oh, Postaf!" she'd say. "As cute as ever."
A long time ago, he remembered Yuzu crying herself to sleep over her brother when he was gone. He couldn't help but think that Ichigo was the Biggest Idiot Ever for making the kid cry, and it didn't help him at all when she would come to him while he was in Ichigo's body and get all snuggly and teary-eyed with him. The best he could ever do was just give her a couple of pats on the back and mumble a "there, there" over and over again.
Kon wondered when she had stopped being a flat-chested girl and had started getting... those. It was almost disturbing, after all that time with her where he would be wanting to yell in her ear that no, he did not find the dresses cute, and where he would be trying his best to run away from her and that other spawn of Satan with the bat and Karin, who pretty much knew he was not just a toy plushie.
They scared him. All of them. But...
"Goodnight, Postaf. See you tomorrow." She climbed in bed with those pink pajamas of hers and brought him up to rest on top of her.
When he knew she was asleep, he moved just a little bit closer and concluded that, yes, Yuzu did have a Valley of the Gods.
Hopefully Ichigo wouldn't mind this contact, especially when Kon was in his body.