There were times where Sebastian had no idea how he had managed to trick Kurt into dating him, and in turn how he let Kurt trick him into dating at all. He supposed it had to do with the way his eyes fucking sparkled when he had clearly won. Maybe it was the way his teeth just peeked out from behind his top lip when he grinned. No, it had to be how he looked in the morning after they'd had particularly vigorous, rough sex. All fucked out and soft, very well sated if Sebastian had anything to say about it. What tops it all is the way Kurt found it in himself to forgive Sebastian for everything that had happened, the way Kurt peered into what was left of his soul. They way he took that piece of Sebastian's soul and nurtured it, brought it back to life, and made him feel like he could be worth something. Fuck, the way Kurt looked at him sometimes drove him insane. It was a blessing and a curse to have Kurt Hummel look at you with those eyes. If they contained a tsunami it could either mean someone was about to face Kurt's wrath or that Sebastian was about to
get laid. God help the poor person that faced the cold grey eyes he could sometimes have. That meant you had hurt someone he loved, it meant you needed to run or you would wind up at the bottom of a lake and no one would find you. Then there was the ethereal almost sea foam green they would turn when Kurt was completely at ease. Most importantly Kurt loved him for all he was, faults included.
They both had many flaws, ones they knew intimately. Kurt had definitely gotten further along in that process and faster than Sebastian had, which was to be expected. Sebastian had somehow managed to have a pretty great home life, his dad being an awkward dork. His maman a modelesque, incredibly sassy woman. Kurt had his father of course who was as a supportive as he could be, especially being born and raised in Lima, Ohio. Sebastian supposed Kurt also had Carole, and Finn when the oaf wasn't busy trying to suck the she-hobbit's lungs out through her scary flotation devices she likes to call lips. Satan and Britt could be counted as well, after all, Kurt took Lady Lips as a compliment when it came from Satan. Lopez was one of kind if she could turn an insult of that caliber into an endearment. The one (and only, trust him, even Sebastian wasn't moronic enough to try again) time he'd heard it used he'd snickered and repeated the name when he had seen Kurt again later that day. To say that Sebastian was scared when he realized it was a bad idea would be a gross understatement. He was still scarred for life and to top it off, he and Kurt lived together. Whenever Sebastian even made a slight comment about the other being too feminine all Kurt had to do was give him a look, raise his perfectly shaped eyebrow, and Sebastian's mouth would immediately snap shut. That's not to say that he and Kurt don't fight, in fact, they squabble like an elderly couple in their 50th year of marriage. They both gave as good as they got and people often retreated as soon as the two of them got started. It made Sebastian grin like a maniac to know he had that much power when it came to his scathing wit. Kurt too felt a little bit of a thrill when he realized just how much his and Sebastian's banter impacted the people around them. To the males it acted as an impressive, albeit intense, bout of foreplay. Thinking back on it they had realized they'd like the banter, the heat it brought to the table, even back in high school where everything had went to shit.
Sebastian didn't quite understand how he'd got to the point he was at now, sitting in the center of their bed and contemplating life with Kurt. At first Sebastian had been looking for an old notebook he'd kept from his days as a 14 year old sap. He'd been the kid that wrote sugary sweet love songs about some big gay love that would magically materialize at some point in his life. Most people assumed that Sebastian's lack of belief in love came from his parents, which hello, what even. His parents were sickeningly in love and very much so together. So no, it didn't come from their supposedly unstable relationship but rather stemming from the incident with his grandmother. He had been 15 at the time, nervous, awkward, gangly Sebastian standing in the hallway connected to his grandmother's library. He remembers being more frightened of her reaction to him coming out than he had his own maman. His grandmother had been there for every important event in his measly 15 years of life. So when pre-growth spurt Sebastian stood,smiling softly, finally having come to accept himself, only to have his grandmother's face take on a furiously disgusted expression. He was crushed, she had sneered at him, but only for a moment before she schooled her face into a disinterested mask and calmly told him to leave. It had been kind of a blur afterwards, Sebastian vaguely remembers screaming matches in which his own grandmother called him an abomination. Abomination is honestly one of the more tame things he had to hear come from his once beloved grandmother's mouth.
Depressing as her rejection was, it hadn't been what sparked his disbelief in love. What came after was the catalyst, his grandparents subsequent divorce. His grandfather, with whom he hadn't been as close to, had sided with Sebastian. In one particularly nasty spat he had called his wife's inability to love unconditionally a disgrace to the Smythe family. Needless to say Sebastian had been incredibly shocked and relieved to find that his grandfather who usually seemed stoic and a little closed off, still loved him. It meant more to Sebastian than he would ever be able to describe. Kurt hadn't met a lot of his family aside from his parents despite the fact that they'd been dating for over 2 years. His mother adored Kurt and quite enjoyed his company when it came to events that involved particularly small minded designers and models alike. His father had been skeptical when Sebastian had brought Kurt home and introduced him on one of his visits from New York. He hadn't believed that Sebastian even had even had a boyfriend until he was stood right of him politely extending his hand with a soft greeting. When Kurt had complimented their dinner in perfect french and then compared it to the purr of a finely tuned engine you could see the stars in Theodore Scythe's eyes. Adelaide could be seen smiling smugly at her husband from across the table, knowing full well that the boy would be accepted as soon as he had walked into the house.
Sebastian shook himself out of his thoughts, realizing he had gotten way off track. He had been trying to find the notebook and instead became distracted by his love for Kurt. Although if he was completely honest he had also been trying to find the ring that Satan so graciously helped him pick out at a previous date. He'd only only lost it a little bit, and Kurt tended to find everything without meaning to. Sebastian would be extremely embarrassed if he had to ask his, hopefully, soon to be fiance for help finding the engagement ring. The notebook was important as well as it had a newly added song he'd started writing almost as soon as he'd realized how he felt about Kurt. So maybe Sebastian wasn't exactly the naive 14 year old who dreamed of an extravagant wedding, planned to perfection, that he would share with his one true love that he of course found at first sight. Kurt made him want to be that kid again, the one so willing to believe in romance. So when he'd been shopping for groceries and other miscellaneous items, per Kurt's request, for their apartment and his eye had been drawn to a jewelry store, he had panicked. He'd actually panicked pretty severely before Satan made herself known by digging her talons into his arm and dragging him away. When they were alone she had plainly told him that she could smell the stench of weakness from miles away, in response to his obviously flabbergasted expression. He babbled his way through an awkward explanation of needing socks made of giraffe eyelashes and maybe a ring because he really loved Kurt. Sebastian cringed but smiled slightly when he felt the outside of the tiny box that contained the fate of his future. He absolutely grinned when he also found his acoustic guitar at the back of their very full closet. He plucked the strings gently trying to get a feel for things, he hadn't played in so long. Sebastian let out a puff of air in frustration when he realized he hadn't found his notebook, as he got up off the edge of the bed he valiantly checked in his side drawer once last time. The excited shriek he let out could rival Kurt's any day, though he would never admit that.
Sighing in satisfaction, he slowly climbed back onto the bed, snatching up his guitar as he did so. Once settled he opened his notebook and glances at the sheet music held on one the last pages. Taking a deep breath he arranged his fingers on the neck of the guitar, his other hand settled with his fingers on the strings, he began to play. A few hours and quite a bit of panicking and second guessing his decision, because what if Kurt said NO? Sebastian had finally calmed down enough to cook dinner and set the mood. Ultimately, if Kurt said no Sebastian would be devastated, he didn't think the boy man would but it was still a fear. He knew he wasn't the fairy tale prince and that's what Kurt deserved. Before Sebastian could give himself a major panic attack, he heard the tell tale signs of Kurt opening the front door. "Bas, where are you?" Kurt shouted in a distracted tone, Sebastian did an awkward shuffle from the kitchen to the entrance. He was promptly engulfed in a hug that to anyone else would have seemed smothering. Kurt gave the best hugs, he gave the kind of hugs that warmed you to your core. The kind of hugs that made Sebastian squeeze Kurt even closer, the kind that made him lower his head and snuffle quietly into his lover's neck. "I made dinner, and I kinda have something I want to show you afterwards." Sebastian whispered before detaching himself from Kurt, moving away he fidgeted with his fingers. Kurt looked at him warily, only for a moment, smiling that secret smile. He moved to sit in the chair Sebastian had pulled out for him, staring bewilderment at the romantic dinner in front of him. They ate slowly, a heavy silence permeating the air. After everything had been cleaned up and they had retreated to the living room, Sebastian nervously turned to Kurt, pulling his guitar out from behind the couch. Kurt settled on his usual side of the couch, folding his hands together in his lap, biting his lip with a concerned look. "I uh, I wrote you something, I'm not very good with words, but I've been told I'm pretty good with music. So here we go." Sebastian sighed, playing the opening notes to his newly written song.
Can't say how the days will unfold,
Can't change what the future may hold
But, I want you in it
Every hour, every minute
This world can race by far too fast
Hard to see while it's all flying past
But, it's clear now,
When you're standing here now
I am meant to be wherever you are next to me
All I want to do
Is come running home to you
Come running home to you
And all my life I promise to
Keep running home to you
Keep running home
To you
And I could see it
Right from the start
Right from the start
That you would be
Be my light in the dark
Light in the dark
Oh, you gave me no other choice
But to love you
All I want to do
Is come running home to you
Come running home to you
And all my life I promise to
Keep running home to you
Keep running home
Home to you
Can't say how the days will unfold
Can't change what the future may hold
But, I want you in it
Every hour, every minute
Sebastian opened his eyes, having unknowingly closed them when he had started getting into the song. He heard a sniffle, his head snapping up in alarm, Kurt was crying softly. It made him panic a little bit, he hadn't meant to make Kurt cry. "I'm sorry, really sorry, I didn't mean to make you cry." Sebastian yelling flailing frantically. Kurt snorted, brushing away the last of his tears, "Don't worry, they're happy tears, that was incredibly sweet, I love you, you dork.". Kurt surged forward nearly smashing their faces together with his enthusiasm. He calmed himself and kissed Sebastian tenderly, pulling away and holding Sebastian's face delicately. "I love you too, more than anyone or anything. So since we've established that we love each other, do you maybe wanna marry me or whatever?" Sebastian stuttered, blurting out the last part hurriedly. He had someone managed to sink down onto one knee and pull out the ring without displacing Kurt's soft hands. A noise that was a cross between and squawk and a squeal was released from Kurt's mouth as he squished Sebastian face in his hands. "Ish that a yesh?" Sebastian asked laughing as much as he could with fish face. "You're an idiot, of course I'll marry you, you sir, are stuck with my crazy ass." He replied grinning, letting his teeth peek out. Sebastian decided that tonight couldn't have been more successful, he had said yes. Sebastian wasn't perfect, neither was Kurt, and their marriage wouldn't be either. But at the very least they both knew they had someone to come running home to.