Hellooooo :) I'm not really a good writer then it comes to KnB but I read it a lot. But I had an idea and I wanted to share it with you.

I wanted to make this story around Kise Ryouta, as u might assume already. He's mostly depicted as a cheerful and easy going person and yes, while he's like this I also think that his colder side isn't much depicted in most fanfics. The colder sides of him will appear in the later chapters, tho, in this he's a little 'emo' haha. But hope, you'll enjoy it anyway :)

CHAPTER I

Group chat GoM + Kagami

18:02 Kise: Guys! I have an idea! ヽ(' ∇' )ノ Let's go camping! My sister was on one and it seemed so fun! Let's do this too, anyone!

19:25 Aomine: That's sounds like a stupid idea.

19:26 Kuroko: I'd agree with Aomine-kun.

19:26 Kise: Eeeh? （ ；´Д｀） Why? It sounds fun!

19:26 Akashi: I'm sorry, Ryouta, but I don't have time for such foolish activities.

19:27 Murasakibara: sounds tiring. Not interested, Kise-chin.

19:27 Midorima: Going camping? As much as I detest it I must agree with Aomine.

19:28 Aomine: OI!

19:28 Kise: So mean (╥﹏╥)

Only the dim light of the display is the light source of the dark room. The curtains are closed, the room light shut. A rather tall silhouette sits on his bed, his back leans against the wall while one leg was outstretched and the other slightly bent. The mobile lies loosely in his hand, his head slightly bent down, his golden locks covering his eyes and a small but slightly bitterly smile is plastered on his lips. Kise Ryouta always appreciates the time he spends with the others and he thought that they were about to drift apart. It was only an idea but how stupidly of him. Kise leans his head against the wall and closes his eyes.

He didn't know why but for a few months he was feeling really down, negative thoughts were just in his mind and he wanted to feel at ease again. Maybe because it was already time to just take his future more seriously. He works as a model while being in school but is it something he wanted to do for the rest of his life? He is already in his third year of high school and it is now time to decide what to do with his future but he just doesn't know what he really should do. It was a bit tiring, to be honest. Kise knows that he isn't a good person like some of his fans assume he is. While his friends know him as a cheerful and positive person he himself thinks he is more cold-heartedly than the others. If something doesn't catch his interest he ignores it. He felt nothing and he doesn't care. Yes, of course he has always a smile left for his fans – but they are his fans and as a model, he needs some kind of supporters, called fans. It is easy for him to wrap them around his little finger and he doesn't even have to put much effort into it. He's confident and self-conscious but sometimes… even Kise Ryouta feels sometimes not… right. As if he isn't good enough for whose he cares about and loves. Kise sighs heavily and leans forward, to rest his chin on his knee before a ding from his mobile signalizes that a new message arrived. Does he want to read another rejection? From whom? Kagamicchi hasn't texted yet. Kise grabs his phone and unlocks the display before opening the message app.

19:45 Kagami: What's with you guys? Camping is fun. I did once in America with

Tatsuya.

Reading the message Kise had to laugh. Well, at least one doesn't find his idea stupid and foolish. As he was about to type his answer, Aomine was first to answer, surprisingly (but unsurprisingly as he reads the message).

19:46 Aomine: Pfft! Yeah, Camping suits you, Bakagami! No, it's annoying. And anyways, what would a pretty boy doing in the wild? Ridiculous!

19:46 Kagami: Oi, Ahomine! Who'd want to go with a guy like you?! You'd be PRETTY useless out there!

19:46 Aomine: As if, Bakagami!

19:46 Kuroko: You both would be rather useless. But Kagami-kun, please don't encourage Kise with his rather dumb idea. No one likes camping.

19:47 Kise: Aww~ Kagamicchi (◠︿◠✿) Thanks!

Moou! Aominecchi, Kurokocchi, so mean (╥﹏╥) Ah, anyways, I have to go to sleep. I have a shoot early in the morning! Please consider my idea, okay, guys? G'night ≧◡≦

Kise puts his phone away and thinks about this again. Would he be really useless in the woods? Good, he wasn't good with earthworms, he detests them but … the whole idea in general sounded so appealing that he wants to try it with his friends. But maybe… it shouldn't be.

"Move a little to the side. The head a bit to the right, please!" the photographer shouts at Kise. It was another shoot for the magazine Zunon Boy, but this time he always got a few whole pages in it with fashionable designer cloths. They were an old house, the decoration is like an old English style. It always was and still is easy to adapt to the likings of different photographers and so he thinks he does a good job. Kise has a really pretty face, even without make up.

What bothers him however is the rather unsatisfied face of this photographer who's foreign to him but he heard of him before. His name was Hiroshi Masayoshi, a well-known name in the fashion industry. He works with famous international models and stars and is hard to get because of his tight schedule. This shoot was planned months ago, almost a year ago. Everyone was excited and everyone knew that Kise was the right model for this shoot – so why doesn't he look satisfied? He even saw his manager giving him a thumbs up.

Hiroshi looks at the pictures on the screen and sighs a bit which makes Kise frown. "Okay, I got it. The best I could" – the latter he mutters behind his imaginary beard – "Change to the new cloths." A few assistants comes running towards Kise but the model walks straight towards the photographer. "Everything's alright, Hiroshi-san?" Kise asks with a cheerful smile on his lips and crooks his head slightly to the side. The man with the short brown hair looks up and scrutinizes him with a frown. "Yeah… quite so" he says and looks at his camera again. Kise isn't quite satisfied with the answer and tries again. "Is that so? Is there anything I can approve in?" The blond was however quite confidence in his work and doesn't understand why Hiroshi isn't liking what he sees. Hiroshi sighs and looks at him with steel grey eyes, which feels like he was trying to see deep inside him. Kise immediately feels uncomfortable and unconsciously steps back. "No, Kise-kun, everything's alright. Okay? Now get change for the next shoot."

That wasn't the answer he was hoping for but he doesn't let it shows on his face but rather smiles politely. "Okay, thank you. I'm going to hurry." Kise turns around but he feels an uncomfortable feeling in his gut. The shoot goes by with a blink of an eye and he should think like always but something doesn't feel right for him. Hiroshi doesn't look satisfied at all and he always had a concerning frown on his face which proofs Kise's worries right. After he removed his make-up and changed into his casual cloths he searches for the photographer. He catches an assistant of him and asks if he was still there, but the response was that he already left for his car. Kise thanks him and rushes outside, passing his manager who calls out to him in confusion. As the blond steps outside he could see Hiroshi packing stuff into his car and walks towards him.

"What was wrong with my shooting?"

Hiroshi looks up and turns to him, a frown on his face. "Kise-kun. Nothing. Why do you keep asking?" he answers and shut the door of his trunk. "You don't look like it's nothing. Something was bothering you… and I'd like to know what it was… I mean…" Kise wonders why he was so … out of his usual self. He couldn't even gather up his strength to smile charmingly at him. Maybe because he knows that he can't fool Hiroshi Masayoshi. "Weren't the photos good?"

Hiroshi pauses a while as he leans against his car, crossing his arms around his chest. He scrutinizes Kise again and shrugs his shoulders. "No. They were good. You are a pretty… no, beautiful person, Kise-kun. I bet you know that already." He scuffs at that. "But I feel there's something missing. Of course the photos were good, no question. But it's like… it's too perfect. It's too flawless." He takes a deep breath and closes his eyes. "You are… rather superficial, aren't you? Yes, you have charming smile, also the serious style suit you, too. But I think there's something missing and what I think… it's passion. Do you like modeling, Kise-kun?" The steel-grey eyes open and look deep into the honey-glazed brown eyes of Kise Ryouta who is taken aback by that comment. "W-what? O-of course-" - "No, do you really love modeling? Does it excite you? Does it make you feel each time you stand in front of the camera fill you with contentment and proud?

"Today, I just felt there was no passion behind it and no emotion. Yeah, of course people will find it good – perfect – because you are stunningly beautiful. But I'm not interested in just the outer appearance. This work… was rather a favor for a friend but if it was for my work I wouldn't hire you again." Hiroshi looks with a serious eye at him before he pushes back and opens his car door. Kise opens his mouth but no words leaves his lips. Only the sound of the shutting door wakes him up from the trance he was in. Kise rushes to the car and opens the door on reflex. "Can I get your contacts?" he asks before he knew what he was asking. Hiroshi frowns at him, narrowing his eyes. He reaches to his pocket, revealing his business card but he scribbles something behind it and gives it to Kise. "That's my private number. If you start texting me randomly I will block you. Now shut the damn door." He almost glares at him so that Kise steps back and lets him drive away.

To be honest he doesn't quite think that that was the issue. His passion. He likes modeling, of course. He likes to be in the spotlight. Kise doesn't understand it quite well and frowns. "Kise-kun?" While he was in thoughts his manager walks up to him but he sees the concentrated look in Kise's face so he stays silent for a while. He lets a few minutes pass as Kise turns to his manager. "Okay, I'm ready to go."

Kise smiled charmingly again and walks to the bigger parking lot where his manager parked.

09:19 Aomine: Yo. You up?

09:41 Kise: Eh? Aominecchi ヽ(^◇^*)/ You're awake and texting me privately? Is the world going down?

09:47 Aomine: Shut up! Satsuki's annoying me and everyone else is busy. Wanna hang out?

09:47 Kise: Eeeeeeehhh? ≧ _ ≦ Am I dreaming?! Aominecchi, did you miss me?! ≧◡≦

09:50 Aomine: Uggh ok that was a bad idea. Forget it.

09:50 Kise: Noooo, I'm not! Let's hang out, pleeeasee!

09:59 Aomine: Tch. Fine. 12am at the usual spot?

10:00 Kise: Yooosshh~ I'm coming!

It was really unusual for Aomine to 1) be awake at this hour on a Sunday and 2) ask him out. Well, yeah, Aomine sometimes takes the initiative but it was mostly Kise who asks the tanned male out. Kise was already awake looking at his photo book from his modeling job and thought about the things the famous photographer had told him. But he could use a distraction so…

Kise gets into his sportswear, throws a jacket on and left his house as soon as possible to be punctual to meet Aomine.

He swears he is really happy to see him again. His schedule was so tight he didn't have much time for basketball. So he is excited to play with Aomine one-on-one again. The long way to the court is definitely worth it. He was almost there as his phone vibrates. Kise hums while he unlock his screen and reads the message, stopping in his movements.

11:48 Aomine: Sorry. Can't come. Tetsu's here and… yeah. There's something or so.

The blond feels his heart tightened a bit… just slightly. He was so excited to play with Aomine and he needed the distraction Aomine and basketball give him. His mind was everywhere and he felt lost so he thought playing basketball or hanging out with friends would calm his mind. But unfortunately things doesn't go as planned. What should he do now? Well, at least he has a ball with him so he could train a little bit on his one… even though it wasn't the same

11:52 Kise: Oh. /╯﹏╰\ So meeaaan. But I was late anyways. I can make it back soon, so don't worry (^▽^) Give Kurokocchi my greetings and … I guess blessings?

Kise feels his hands around his phone slightly trembling. It stings, to be honest, to be rejected again. But he takes a deep breath and still walks to the basketball court he was supposed to meet Aomine. He puts his bag down next to the fence and takes the ball out, balancing it in his hands while he's still in his thoughts. He slowly walks to the center of the court and stops in the middle, as he looks up to the basket and positions himself to throw the ball into it.

Kise trains a bit of his style, on his perfect copy because he doesn't want to outlearn them, somehow. He doesn't want to be left behind by his friends. While it looks like everyone knows what they're doing he himself is struggling with his future. He isn't so sure anymore and … it feels like basketball was the only constant which keeps him sane.

Practicing went quite well, considering he was alone. He could go deep inside him and musters all his motivation, his strength to perform. However, each move he did remembered him of his friends he didn't see for almost two months. Kise pants slightly and brushes his sweat from his chin and bounces the ball on one spot. Imagine his opponents was easier to practice but it was like as if he would play with them. Kise stops the ball from bouncing and takes a deep breath, before he sits down, with a deep frown between his brows.

It … was no fun. Slowly the old feeling creeps through his body, an old feeling he felt back in middle school. It isn't because he is too good … but then he thinks of basketball he thinks of his friends, the generation of miracles … and he feels the excitement, the burning in his gut to play but also the feeling that he will never be good enough. Not in his skills, though. Not good enough for the generation of miracles. To sum it up – he feels lost and suffocated. Kise Ryouta is at one point of his life there he sees no sense in everything anymore. The feeling of being not enough was always there. It never left him but in the past it wasn't that bad as it was today. Even Aomine, who loves basketball over everything, rejected him to play his beloved basketball. Yeah, maybe Kuroko was in trouble, of course he would choose Kuroko over Kise… His admiration for Aomine was so deep inside him that he couldn't … give up. He was his inspiration. His motivation. Somehow his hero. But everything he feels right now is so suffocating…so tiring. Kise huffs and stands up, walks to his bag to check his phone for maybe … a message. From Aomine. Maybe he will come?

12:01 Aomine: I got rid of him. Come see me.

12:02 Aomine: Shit. Wasn't meant for you.

Kise lowers his hand, his amber colored eyes narrow and his lips press together. He feels his heart tightened. "So stupid, Ahominecchi", he whispers and types back.

13:58 Kise: ≧ _ ≦ Eeeh? Okay! How's Kurokocchi? Is he alright? Hope he is (^▽^)

His face is rather emotionless, not even a flinch of his lips. Kise Ryouta stares at the display, with dull amber eyes, as he sees little water drops falling on the screen. Does it start to rain? Kise looks up but the sky was crystal clear and he frowns. Realizing that it isn't raining he wonders there the water comes from, as he notices something wet on his face. Long, slender finger touches his face, feeling the wetness on it. "Huh? What's this?"

It seeps slowly into his mind that he was crying. He doesn't understand. Kise bites his lower lip and tries to take a deep breath again and to calm down. Slowly he crouches down, wipes his tears away and puts the ball back into his bag, as he sees someone stopping next to him. Kise raises his head and looks into steel-grey eyes.

It is still sunny and warm, a few people sit outside and chat over a few things Kise doesn't hear. In front of him is a cup of coffee he hasn't touched yet and fumbles with the handle nervously. "I heard that you were a basketball player", Hiroshi said and takes a sip of his own coffee. "But I didn't know that you were a good player. I've seen a lot of games in America and I'm interested in it. Should I assume that basketball is your passion…" He stops and hesitates as he watches Kise's concern face. "Or it was your passion." Kise looks at him and forces a smile on his face. "No, I love basketball. But how long were you watching?" he asks the photographer and finally takes a sip of the coffee which was too bitter for his tasting. "Long enough before you had your little… break out", he says bluntly making Kise flinch a little. "It seems you're unpassionate with it as modeling?" "No!" He raises his voice a little too loud, earning a few confused looks from the other customer at the café. Kise lowers his head and clenches his fist. "… I love basketball. I'm… I'm a fast learner, you see? It's easy for me to learn different kinds of sports. In middle school… I tried all sorts of sports club but I mastered them in no time and surpassed the top player. I got bored easily…"

While he talks he could feel the eyes of the older man, watching him, observing him but even if Kise looks into his face he couldn't read him. "But then I came to know Aominecchi and … he inspired me to play basketball and he was and is the only one I can't surpass. I was motivated and I came to love basketball. I'm not someone who will give up so easily." Kise puts his elbow on the table and puts his head on his hands. "And I tried. But… now I just feel lost because I can't… surpass him. Still, after all this years and … yeah, It's great that I can't but In my old team there were so many good players and…" Kise stops as he realizes how he rambles in front of a stranger. Hiroshi wasn't a complete stranger but he doesn't know him really well, at all. He leans back and forces a laugh. "I'm sorry, I'm rambling. I didn't mean to bother you with my problems."

Hiroshi shrugs his shoulders and drinks his coffee. "I don't mind. I see how shaken you are and as I watched you play I could feel it. Your passion. The indestructible desire to not lose even though you were playing alone." He puts the cup on the table and pauses for a moment. "To be honest, after the shoot I got interested in you. You were different as one would describe you. I watched a game of you. It's that passion I wanted to see." Hiroshi leans back and sighs. "I have a proposal for you."

Group Chat GoM + Kagami

22:06 Kise: Guys, guys! Listen to this one! ヽ(゜∇゜)ノ I got a job offer from a super-duper famous photographer! And he wants to shoot us while we're playing! It would be also published because he has connection to the editor! That's super exciting!

22:08 Midorima: Photo shoot? That's sounds like a terrible idea. Especially, if Oha Asa told me to not become involved in rather foolish activities I might regret.

22:08 Aomine: Am I a fucking model? That's a stupid idea, again. Do you always have those kind of stupid ideas in your head? Hah, then you must be pretty stupid!

22:09 Kuroko: Speaking of yourself, Aomine-kun? But I don't think it's a great idea either.

22:09 Midorima: Also, we're in our third year in high school. We should focus more on school now.

22:09 Kagami: Which magazine are you talking about, Kise?

22:10 Kise: You're all so mean! It's a great opportunity for all of us who wants to work as a professional. 丶´Д｀ And it's for the Slam Magazine, in the USA! Isn't it exciting?!

22:10 Aomine: What? U must be kidding. He's pranking us, that bastard!

22:10 Kise: I'm not tho (╥﹏╥) believe me. And if you don't want he would publish them himself. He's a well-known photographer!

22:12 Kagami: No shit?! Slam Magazine?! I read it all the time back in America!

22:12 Kuroko: Maybe you should go back to America, Kagami-kun.

22:12 Kagami: Oi, Kuroko!

22:14 Murasakibara: sounds annoying, like Kise-chin.

22:14 Kise: MEAN!

22:15 Akashi: Ryouta.

22:15 Kise: Yes? (｡◕‿◕｡)

22:16 Akashi: We will not participate in this. It will cause unwanted attention and we have to focus. Also, I'm rather fed up with those kinds of proposal of you. We have no time for you and your annoying ideas.

22:16 Aomine: Haha! Damn right. Stop it and get los, Kise!

22:16 Akashi: I must assume then you are studying well, Daiki?

22:17 Aomine: Eeehhh…

Kise presses his lips together and leans back, looking to the ceiling. "I knew it", he whispers to himself and smiles sadly.

Pls r&r :D