To whom it may concern,
If you're reading this, you know I'm dead. You know that I gulped down almost every bottle under my kitchen sink and then fell asleep in my bed, thinking about how much life sucks. Why did I do it?
I've been so sick of everything lately. I was sick of the grades, the disappointed parents, the beatings, the ridicule, and then taking everything out on my friends. I've been thinking about this for a long time, but never found the courage to do it. I'm sorry for treating people like crap, and I'm sorry if you really care that I'm gone.
The "Eds" – Double D, I know you always thought of me as unintelligent. Actually, I am. My vocabulary has just been more extended recently, because I've decided to look up some of your big fancy words in the dictionary to find out what they mean. I spent three hours reading words in the dictionary, just for the hell of it. I never meant to boss you two around as much as I did. I suppose I took everything out on you guys because I knew, no matter what, you would put up with me. I want to tell you that you both made me a better person, but I really haven't changed. I hope you'll miss me a little, but not too much, to the point of becoming depressed or anything. I've always thought of you as my brothers, so I can say this without feeling gay…I love you.
Mom and Dad – Thank you for putting me down and always picking your other son over me when it came to anything. This isn't your fault, though, and if there's a heaven I'll be missing you just like I'll be missing Double D and Ed.
Brother – You made me feel like shit. Although you weren't one of those big brothers who beat their kid brothers up, you still hurt my ego whenever you were home. You left me with the biggest footsteps to fill and everyone expected great things from me…And I couldn't please them. I still love you, bro.
Nazz – Please don't think this is your fault for turning me down last week in front of the whole school. I don't want you to think you're that special.
Kevin – You weren't always an asshole…Wait, yes you were. Never mind.
Pass this on as a final note of my remembrance, even though I made little or no impact on anything in this lifetime.
Sincerely,
Eddy.
P.S.: The scams were never about jawbreakers. I always had money stashed in my room.