Escaping Wammy's House

"Do I really have to?" L asked for the nth time in that car ride. Watari nodded. "But you know I hate that place, right?"

"Yes."

"So buy me a condo!" L said. "I mean, I can live on my own. The skyscraper mom and dad owned is being shut down until I'm eighteen, which is like twelve months away, and besides, you could give me a fake ID or something."

"I'm not giving you a fake ID, L, stop reading the Fault in Our Stars."

"How'd you know I'm reading that?"

Watari pointed at the half-zipped bag on the car floor. "You already finished it a year ago."

"Which makes it much more boring. In addition to being forced to live with those…cannibals, you going to the US, Roger taking time off, and me, being a caretaker in their for a month—do you know there's a 70% possibility that the house may end up in a fire, and 30% a few, most, kids damaged?" L added, "Not to mention, I'm bad with kids. Do you know why Mom and Dad never let me near my cousins? Yeah, 'cause there's a huge possibility I might dropped them or injure them, or anything! I mean, you see me pick things up. And I'm an insomniac. Those kids would get annoyed at me for staying up late!"

"Which is why you should learn how to sleep," Watari pointed out. L grunted.

"I don't want to go to sleep. I wanna help with the police, and that's final," L said. Helping with the police was much more intriguing that playing caretaker for a month with those…those…those sick demonic monsters. Those psychopaths. His mom and dad usually leaves cases to him, to fend off some time, and leave him in the skyscraper to go to Hawaii or something, thus leaving him with that case and that police. There had been a 0.001% he could fail, but he didn't.

"You're acting like a kid."

"I'm not acting like those cannibalistic demons. I'm being me," L said indignantly. "I mean, I could list different differences. I'm smarter—"

"They're gifted and smart, L."

"I stopped watching cartoons when I was two."

"They have no television there, whatsoever."

"I'm an insomniac."

"There are two kids there who are, and I'll be dumping you in one of their rooms."

"I have a sweet tooth."

"They're kids."

"I…You're really comparing me to kids, aren't you?"

"Yes."

"Fine. I'm the world's youngest and a famous detective."

"They've solved a few cases in the vicinity, they're quite famous as well."

"Wha—but—."

"Face it, L," Watari said. The engine cut off and in front of the car stood Wammy's House. "You're going to live inside that place until you're eighteen. Now you don't want your parents to be disappointed, do you?"

L grunted. He hated this part. Staring at the old English building he noticed something. The sign was Japanese. Normally it would be in English, because you know, they were in England. But no. everything in this sign was in Kanji, with no translations whatsoever. He read the bottomline.

OSAKA, JAPAN

"What the—Watari, I think you got the address wrong. We're in Osaka, not in England," L said.

"Very good observation skills, L, yes we're in Osaka." Watari added, "Did I even tell you about this? Hm, maybe if you weren't so caught up whining. We're not in England. Wammy's House in England burned down a month ago. As such, some kids were transported here, as they have some rooms, and the others in America. That's why I'm going to go there. And to take care of an easy and boring case, also. Anyways, I hope your best. Get out there and show me you're ready."

Begrudgingly, L did, and hell did he regret it. Watari tossed him his bag and turned on the engine and sped away leaving L coughing dust. Wait, he was supposed to come inside alone? A moment later, his cheap phone Watari bought him rang.

A message.

He opened the little tiny envelope and there came the message: Your school starts the day after tomorrow, btw – Watari.

Oh, that did it. (What in heaven's name does BTW mean? He thought.)

He threw his phone. Somewhere out of the property and into some bushes.

But he remembered that was his only source of communication with that old damn bastard.

He ran (is that even possible?) and dove to said bushes.

He hated this.

He hated the children.

He hated Watari.

…

…

But if they have sweets, it could tone down his hatred for them a bit. Well, maybe. If they're first class. Or Belgian chocolates.

He was gonna survive this.

After all, he was a born survivor...

Right?

A/N: so first Death Note fanfic. hooray! Not. I've been planning tons of Death Note fanfics as of late but none seem to have made any sense when I write it. So I'd resorted to this. Yes, yes, I know, L is a bit OOC in this but hey. He'll be a little like himself in the next chapters. I do hope this made any sense to you, though. I wrote this early in the morning.

REVIEW my lovelies!

Yours truly,

Chira Somes