A/N- As I said in the summary this is a fic I wrote for 'The Prompts' forum. The song fic challenge was to write a romance story to the song "Crush Crush Crush" by Paramore. This is an X-men story and it ignores Wolverine's back story in Origins. I apologize in advance for any OOC you might notice. I have never written a songifc before and found it to be more difficult than I would have thought.
Disclaimer: As per usual I own nothing.
Beta: Phantom130 5
She looked up from her place under a weeping willow, book resting in her lap and eyes zeroing in on the man watching her from the window. She had been at Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters for just shy of a month, and had yet to talk to the reason for her being here. She had so much to tell him, but she could never get him to talk to her. He was always close, but any time she approached him he would walk away and disappear for the rest of the afternoon.
The man standing in the window turned and walked away from the view when he realized his person of focus was staring back at him. She had been at the mansion for almost a month, and he still couldn't figure out why she smelt so familiar. No matter how many times he tried to tell himself she was nothing to him he found himself following her around the property, yet when she tried to talk with him he would get away as quickly as he could. He couldn't bring himself to face the woman, and it was starting to frustrate him, but he hated the look in her eyes. It was disconcerting the way she looked at him, as if she knew something he was unaware of.
I got a lot to say to you,
Yeah, I got a lot to say.
I noticed your eyes are always glued to me,
Keeping them here and it makes no sense at all.
Looking at the man always caused conflicting emotions to well up in her chest. She was overjoyed to have finally found him after all these years; it was a relief to see him, smell him, to be so close to him, but the fact that he forgot his life before, the life they had made together, stung. She couldn't figure out the exact cause of his memory loss, but she was sure that it had to do with his new metal claws. It was like they had taken him from her, completely altered him and replaced him with someone new. There were little things he did that still reminded her of her husband, her mate. The way he walked around chewing cigars. The subtle body language he used to communicate, but this strangers bitter attitude, and angry presence was in sharp contrast to the man he once was.
They taped over your mouth,
Scribbled out the truth.
With their lies,
You little spies.
They taped over your mouth,
Scribbled out the truth.
With their lies,
Your little spies.
She hadn't seen him for over twenty years. He went out to hunt one December morning and had not returned. She only grew concerned after he hadn't returned for over a week. He always made it back, or found a way to contact her if he was going to be gone longer than that, but this time there was nothing. No call, no message. After two more days she decided to follow his trail, being a feral herself made it possible to track where he had been, but where his trail ended there was evidence of a struggle. She searched for years, and finally it lead her to Xavier and his School for Mutants. She found who she was looking for, but this man, Logan, as he went by now, was much different from her beloved James.
Crush. Crush. Crush. Crush, crush. 2, 3, 4!
It was another two weeks before she managed to get Logan alone so they could talk. She had cornered him one night in the kitchen while he was prowling around after everyone was asleep. The way he stalked about the house brought a smile to her face, he use to do the same thing before they took him away. She stepped into the kitchen after he settled down.
He settled in the kitchen a glass bottle of coke clenched in his hand, scowl marring his face. He recognized the moment when she stepped into the kitchen. His nose twitched at her familiar sent. He made to get up and leave but realized that she was blocking the only exit. He was cornered and he was not pleased with that. He bared his teeth and started to growl low in his chest.
"Calm down Logan. I only want to talk with you. I have been trying to speak with you for over a month now, but you keep eluding me."
Her quite voice shattered the silence of the kitchen, and cause Logan to stop growling.
"I don't know what ya want to say to me bub, but whatever it is I don't want ta here it." He replied, as he looked away from her, nose again flaring at her familiar sent.
"Even if I could tell you who you were?" She asked as she settled on the counter across from where he was sitting.
At her comment Logan's head shot up and he stared directly at her. He opened his mouth to speak, but before any words left his lips a student pressed their way into the kitchen and started rummaging around for a late night snack. The tension in the room was broken and the women slipped out of the kitchen, her evening plans of speaking with the Wolverine ruined.
Nothing compares to,
A quiet evening alone.
Just the one two,
I was just counting on.
That never happens,
I guess I'm dreaming again.
Let's be more than,
This now!
Though his interest was piqued by her quite words he couldn't quite bring himself to believe what she was saying. How could this woman who looked no older than Jean know about him and his past? What she was saying had to be a lie. He resolved that he would stay away from her more adamantly now; she would not manage to corner him again.
This was starting to turn into a game of hide and seek, and it was starting to frustrate her. It was like he was avoiding her now, and the game was beginning to aggravate her. She just wanted to talk with him, a conversation. She wasn't asking for much. She heard from the Professor that he was trying to find his past, and she was offering to fill in the gaps for him. Why was he being so difficult? Well if he wanted to keep playing this game, she would play, and she would win. She rather beat him through persistence than give up on him. She had been waiting and searching for over twenty years, what was a few more weeks?
If you want to play it like a game,
Well, come on, come on, let's play.
Cuz I'd rather waste my life pretending,
Then have to forget you for one whole minute.
He was having more nightmares than usual. Every night it was a new image, but they weren't all bad, not all could be considered nightmares. He kept seeing a little house in the woods with a nameless, and blurry faced woman welcoming him home. Her scent, it was so familiar, but he couldn't place it. He needed air, space to think. He got up from his bed and made his way to the yard. Maybe the night air would clear his fuzzy mind.
They taped over your mouth,
Scribbled out the truth.
With their lies,
You little spies.
They taped over your mouth,
Scribbled out the truth.
With their lies,
Your little spies.
She was again under the Weeping Willow Tree, just enjoying the night air. She noticed that Logan was stalking the yards more often recently, and again was hoping to catch him so they could talk. It seemed that tonight her persistence had paid off. She saw him exiting the mansion, his mind seemingly elsewhere as he approached the tree she was perched under.
Crush. Crush. Crush. Crush, crush. 2, 3, 4!
That scent, it was the same as the one in his dreams, his fragmented memories. It was her. Was it possible she wasn't lying to him, that she really did know who he was. He decided that the only way for him to get peaceful night's sleep was to confront her. He headed to where she was perched under the tree.
She watched as he settled himself under the tree next to her. She observed as he cataloged her scent, his eyes closing like he was trying to remember.
"Do you want to hear what I have to say now?"
Nothing compares to,
A quiet evening alone.
Just the one two,
I was just counting on.
That never happens,
I guess I'm dreaming again.
Let's be more than,
This now!
He just nodded at her quite question, and she began her story. She told him their story. It was strange to be telling the tale to one of the main characters. Her eyes glazed over with the memories, her voice softly continuing the story.
He listened as the woman next to him told him about the life he was trying to remember. It was strange to be told about yourself when you didn't remember, but he sensed that she was telling him the truth. This woman sitting next to him was his wife, his mate. She told him that she had been looking for him for twenty years. When she finished telling her story he finally looked at her and saw that her eyes were glazed with the memories.
Rock and roll, baby.
Don't you know that we're all alone now,
I need something to sing about.
Rock and roll, Hey!
Don't you know baby, we're all alone now,
I need something to sing about.
Rock and roll, Hey!
Don't you know, baby, we're all alone now,
Give me something to sing about.
The sun rose in the distance and the two remained seated under the tree. It was him who rose first this time. He retreated back into the mansion leaving the women alone under the tree, he had too much to think about, he needed to be alone.
He approached her for the second time three weeks later while she was reading alone in the library. He sat on the chair across from her and stared at her until she looked at him. His eyes burned into hers as the silence between them thickened.
"Why?"
His simple question rang through her ears. Why? Why, what? Why did she spend twenty years looking for him? Why didn't she give up? Why was she here now? The silence shattered with her response.
"I love you still. I never stopped. You are my mate, and there is no changing that for me James."
"I am not James."
His response was accompanied by the voices of a group of students entering the room and her chair scrapping across the floor as she stood up to leave.
She fled the room and he was able to catch the salt of her tears as the door to the library slammed behind her.
Nothing compares to,
A quiet evening alone.
Just the one two,
I was just counting on.
That never happens,
I guess I'm dreaming again.
Let's be more than,
No, ohh.
The next time they were alone, it was an accident. He walked into the room where she was sat reading. He was surprised to see her after their last interaction. He had been dreaming again, the nameless and faceless woman in his dreams had been identified. The dreams were becoming more detailed and the pieces were beginning to flow together. He was slowly staring to realize why she was looking for him. Why she never gave up on him, and why she wanted to have what they lost. He took a seat next to her on the couch, and did the only thing he could, he pulled her into his arms without a word. She laid her head on his chest and sighed, silent tears began to steam down her face.
She wanted more than this, but it was a step in the right direction. She realized how hard this must be for him, but maybe someday they could be more than what they were now.
Nothing compares to,
A quiet evening alone.
Just the one two,
I was just counting on.
That never happens,
I guess I'm dreaming again.
Let's be more than,
More than this.
A/N- So there it was, again I own neither X-men nor the Lyrics used in this story.