The group of commandos crept closer to the military facility nestled in the heart of America. It was late and the MPs guarding the complex were getting ready to go off shift. The tactical genius leading the infiltration group of four had decided this was the perfect time to strike.
"Now take them down now." he told the woman in the group who emerged seductively from the bushes dressed in a highly revealing tank top and mini skirt heading towards the guards who raised their weapons as she moved through the flood lit checkpoint.
"Maam this is restricted property." one of the MPs announced, "You will have to turn round this is no place for civilians."
"But Captain you have no idea why I'm here." the woman purred flicking her blonde hair out of her eyes.
"Alright Jones." the Captain's second in command sneered, "You got us a broad who wants to play."
"We'll play." the woman announced kissing Jones before pulling away and turning to the other three MPs. "Who's next?" she asked sweetly. The men grinned and each received a kiss before all four fell to the ground, wisps of green smoke emerging from their lips. "Good night gentlemen, you have made your country proud." the woman said sarcastically as the rest of the team emerged from the bushes.
"Well done." the leader told the female agent, "Now let's move it's only a few minutes before the experiment begins." he told the others as they moved into the courtyard where a long low building stood, a single light shining, a clear indicator of their target. "Open the door." he ordered the stocky well built man.
"My pleasure." the man replied in accented English before he lined up with the door and charged slamming through an empty sentry turret and a troop truck before striking the door sheering through the steel construction opening the building up to the commandos. "Door's open now get inside." he yelled.
"Subtle." the forth member of the group commented sarcastically, "Still it gets us closer to the end result of your plan."
"Yes it does." the leader announced as he stepped over the threshold. Stalking through the corridors it soon became apparent that the base security wasn't going to be able to hold the intruders. They tried but failed the pile of mutilated bodies in the wake of the commando group evidence to their skill. "Here we are." the leader announced, "You know the drill shut up and follow my lead." he ordered before opening the door to the lit room, pistol drawn, the appearance of the group shocking the three men and one woman in military fatigue as well as the two attending scientists.
"Who are you?" the scientist in charge asked in a foreign accented voice.
"We are from the future." the leader of the commandos announced, "That man is an enemy spy who's mission is to change the course of history." he added shooting a scrawny blonde man who was in the process of being strapped into a machine. The man fell over dead and the commando leader turned to the scientist and his assistant before shooting the later as he drew a gun from his holster.
"And him?" the Scientist asked staring at the odd group of assailants as the woman bent down to check the second victim.
"It's him boss." she announced, "Looks like we stopped this piece of filth's plan to keep this experiment from failing."
"What is going on?" One of the soldier asked, "Who are you?"
"As I said we are from the future, these men are agents of HYDRA sent back in time to stop this crucial event from happening as well as getting their hands on a super powered agent of their own." the commando leader informed.
"If you are from the future you must have a time machine." the head scientist asked.
"I do," the group leader told him wrapping a multi coloured scarf around his neck, "It's a lot bigger on the inside isn't that right buxom assistant."
"Yes Doctor," the woman giggled before wincing in mock pain and pointing to a metal figure at the other end of the room, "Doctor a Cyberman." she screeched.
"Don't worry my sonic screwdriver will take care of him." the leader announced jabbing the metal man with the device, "Take that." he told the imaginary assailant.
"Uh Wade," the forth man said, "Can you stop that."
"Oh right sorry Iron Clad, you know how it is." Deadpool replied shaking his head, "Chemistro, Unicorn secure these men, I will have to check if their spies in league with the enemy." he ordered. Grumbling Unicorn and Chemistro stuffed the military personnel into a broom closet before the later sealed the door with a quick set adhesive.
"So what the hell do we do know?" Unicorn asked Deadpool, "We went back in time and possibly changed history."
"Possibly changed history?" Chemistro replied, "Hell we have changed history. He's dead for starters, god knows what else we have done."
"Tate chill we all knew this was going to happen." Deadpool told her, "Besides he's dead in our time as well so everything is A-OK."
"Chemistro may have a point." Unicorn stated, "He's dead before he got injected with the serum."
"So?" Deadpool asked
"So everything he did will never happen, who knows what knock on effect this could have on our time." Unicorn lectured, "You did think this through right Wilson. Because if you didn't I'll rip off your head."
"Yes I thought this through," Deadpool announced, "We simply stay here and live as heros and kings, I mean we have the advantage right and we get everything we wanted when we set out on this venture."
"How?" Iron Clad asked as he flexed his muscles.
"You wanted to be free from your past." Deadpool announced, "Now you are in the past. Unicorn wants his ageing to stop and now it has, the time machine stops us all from ageing until we get back to our start point. As for Chemistro you want your son, well when we destroy HYDRA you will be able to get him back because he won't have left."
"And I won't exist" Tate hissed, "Give me the amulet I'm getting out of here and if you two have any sense you'll come with me, we've already screwed up the past enough let's not wreck it anymore." Something smashed and Deadpool flicked the shards of a crushed amulet into a dustbin before removing his mask and grinning. "Opps." he said cutely, although not cute enough to stop the other three villains from glaring at him and moving in for the kill.
"You idiot." the Unicorn growled, "Now we are stuck here, we have no funds, no pasts, we will be locked away for what we have done."
"And that's different from the hell-hole we escaped from?" Deadpool asked, "Listen I have a plan. We can keep the future from being destroyed if we follow it to the le…" the rest of his plan was blocked out as Tate sprayed a thick gel gumming his mouth shut.
"No more talking, you have landed us in the 40s, you killed Captain America you may as well have handed Adolf Hitler an invite to rule the world." Tate screeched firing a jet of flame from her wrist sprayers as Deadpool flipped over her before slamming into Iron Clad's metal stomach.
"I've been waiting to do this since my first day on the Avengers." Iron Clad grunted as he begun to tug Deadpool's arms until they dislocated, "Hey Unicorn take a free shot." Iron Clad invited as he spun Deadpool around to face the villain as he charged up the Power Horn that stuck out of his head. Deadpool stuck out his tongue and shattered the gel covering his mouth.
"Wait this won't help you or save the future." he announced, "But the solution to all of our problems is cowering in that broom closet." he added.
"Explain." Iron Clad said cracking Deadpool's elbows so they jutted up at an uncomfortable angle. "Or I break you, Unicorn will kill you and Chemistro will burn you with fire so hot that you won't regenerate."
"Well it's like this see." Deadpool told his former partners in crime, his voice a fair imitation of a 20s Gangster, "We use the egg-head to create a new Captain America see."
"Oh and who would be idiotic to volunteer for that?" the Unicorn asked, "And what's with the accent?" he asked.
"You just answered your own question Unicorn." Tate answered, "This is why he took the Time Machine and brought us here, this was his stupid plan all along, he just needed people he could use to get this far."
"Actually your all my audience." Deadpool corrected her, "With me as Captain America we can keep the world from becoming Nazi Central and you guys can live as kings from what you can do. Imagine the patents you can file Tate, or the inventions you can fiddle with Milos or whatever the hell you do Steel. You guys will be the Invaders."
"This was never about money Wilson." Tate snarled, "It's about…"
"Yeah I know your kid." Deadpool said, "So I'll buy you a new one, seriously I don't know why you and I work together at times."
"It's because you owe me and because you constantly screw me over." Tate replied, "One of these days you will burn out and I'll be there laughing as you realize the mistake you made, whatever the hell it is."
"So that's a yes, what about you Iron Clad." Deadpool asked obliviously.
"Only because I remember what Ra told me when he gave me and Eric this thing. I know we won't be getting home so I may as well make a life here." Iron Clad growled, "But bare in mind Wilson as soon as you screw me over I will carry out that threat I made." he added releasing Deadpool who pushed his arms back into their normal positions.
"Seriously Iron Clad you've got a whole Bane thing going on." Deadpool yammered, "It works for you. Finally Unicorn best buddy are you in or out."
"Do I have any choice?" Unicorn said sarcastically.
"Not really." Deadpool confirmed, "Chemistro let the scientist out would you."
Angrily Tate sprayed the door and the adhesive melted and she wrenched the door open before Deadpool pushed her out of the way. "Good news guys your alibis check out and your all free to go." he told the prisoners in his most apologetic tones. "Unfortunately our Time Machine has become…" he paused before continuing, "… damaged so we will be staying here, rest assured we will do everything to keep history on track." he added "Now you German Scientist who mysteriously defected to the Allies for the purpose of making Stan Lee a few bucks with Marvel Comics."
"What?" the Scientist asked.
"Don't worry he just broke the forth wall." Stan Lee replied as he happened to walk through the room, "Wade are you free for dinner with the family at seven on Friday?" he asked.
"Okay." Deadpool replied happily, "Bye Stan oh but before you go say the line."
"Excelsior." Stan Lee sighed before wandering off muttering something about joining the staff as DC comics, if only for a break in the insanity. "So Doc." Deadpool said happily pulling his mask back on, "Let's get the experiment running. Captain America me." he ordered, "Preferably with a cool montage." he added as he pulled off his top and strapped himself into the machine eager for the process to begin.
Deadpool: Whoo I'm back baby.
Impurest Cheese: Oh God what have I done
Deadpool: Just the most awesome thing in fanon history. Deadpool 4 ever man.
Impurest Cheese: You know that this won't work. The new and improved Task Force HAMMER will stop you.
Deadpool: No they won't.
Impurest Cheese: Yes they will, think of me as the god controlling your action Deadpool, you are just a puppet…hey guys.
Iron Clad: Cool I'm in the last word section.
Deadpool: Shush just stand there next to Unicorn and look fierce. Now who's god because I'm sure Captain America beats some lame writer god.
Impurest Cheese: I am working with idiots.
Chemistro: Tell me about it man, by the way how did Deadpool get a Time Machine and all I got was a lost kid and a can of Doctor Pepper.
Iron Clad: You got a Doctor Pepper? All I got was some lame rebranding to make up number for the Dark Avengers. I didn't even get the name I wanted.
Unicorn: I got nothing so be thankful.
Impurest Cheese: Idiots I tell you. All will be revealed in the closing parts of the Asgard Offensive and Escape from Negative Island.
Deadpool: And as always comment, critic and compliment.