Title: Craving

Author: Mariedex

Spoilers: Four months after FO

Disclaimer: The characters in the story are the sole property of Hank Steinberg, Jerry Bruckheimer, and CBS. No copyright infringement is intended.

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Jack and Sam slip one night.


It had been a long day. She had been one of the last to leave the office. All she had to do was stop by the grocery and pick up some milk, then change. Martin and her were going to meet later on that night. They had been doing a lot of that lately. If it wasn't Martin, it was with Danny. Four months since being shot and she still had issues being alone. Danny always provided some comic relief, but Martin, Martin provided something different. She hated to admit that she was using him, but she was. She enjoyed the way he looked at her. The way that she could make him smile, the way his hand would brush the hair out of her face. She enjoyed talking to him, he always allowed her to talk. Something that perhaps she needed more than she would care to admit. No she wasn't using him, she was rather enjoying him. She was using him to get over the loneliness and the emptiness, that hole that Jack had left. It amazed her that she didn't feel this way until after he moved back in with his wife. After he had saved her life, after they had officially ended it. Perhaps she had finally come to the realization that she was only a mistress and that was all that she was allowed to be. Some cheap thing that he used to get himself off before going home to his wife. Marie was something that he would never leave for awhile Sam hadn't allowed herself to believe that, but now it was clear.

So yes, maybe her seeing Martin was a way to get back at Jack. To show him that he didn't hurt her. To let him see that somebody else could do to her what he used to do.

She had been sorting through her purse when she walked up the stairs. Carefully trying to balance her groceries and her purse, she hadn't looked up until she found her keys and then he was there.

Jesus Christ.' She jumped. He had been standing there the whole time.

He apologized.

How long have you been standing there?

About an hour.

She questioned as he grabbed some groceries out of her hand allowing her to open the door.

I, um, just needed to talk.

So you stand outside my doorway for an hour?

Knew you would come here eventually. He already entered the apartment without an invitation. He was busy in the kitchen putting away her groceries. Sam locked the door and took off her shoes, trying desperately to get over her shock and utter confusion about Jack being here.
What if I had come home with somebody?

But you didn't. Jack answered simply.

But I could have. Damn him she thought, she should have brought somebody, she could bring somebody home with her.

You mean like Martin.

Yes, actually, like Martin. Sam took off her jacket, completely aware that he was staring at her. What did you want to talk about? Let's just get this over, she thought.

How are you doing? He asked walking up behind her.

Fine. But you know that. You get my psych reports.

No, I mean how are you doing?

This whole game he was playing annoyed her. She was too tired to be interrogated by him. What do you want?

I don't want you to see him anymore.



I don't want you to see Martin anymore. He stepped up closer to her, forcing her up against the wall.

I don't think you have any say in that.

Yes, I do actually.

Sam started laughing. I guess you do. Maybe send OPR after us. Tell them that it is compromising our work. She was mad at him. How dare he come here and tell her whom she can and can not see.

That was all he said as edged closer to her face. She could smell him and the slight smell of alcohol on his breath. He must have gone to a bar before he came her. It was only until he started teasing her mouth with his own, did she realize what he wanted tonight. All of her thoughts left her when he kissed her, exploring her mouth with his tongue. He pushed her shirt up in order to touch her skin. Sam instantly responded by wrapping her leg around his. His lips went down her neck and followed the sleek line of her neck. Sam moaned slightly. Jack then came back up to her mouth, slamming her harder against the wall. He grabbed her other leg and wrapped it around himself. She allowed him to pick her up and bring her into the bedroom. All the time they never lost touch with the others mouth. He placed her on the bed and hovered over her, watching her movements as she tried to undo his pants. Her instincts were guiding her, there was no thought of what she was doing or what he was doing. All she knew was that she needed him, as soon as possible. When they finally were free of their clothes, that was when the intensity began.

He entered into her roughly, not giving her enough time to adjust to him. Adjust to the pain that was Jack, she moaned slightly as he entered. JAck responded by kissing her more intensely with every motion. Tears formed in her eyes. Jack didn't seem to notice. It was if he was fulfilling a craving that he had, with every bit of intensity and emotion. And Sam was allowing him. She could have stopped him, slowed him down. BUt she choose not to. Choose to allow the rawness and pain happen. She knew that he was bruising her, she knew that her back would hurt her in the morning. When he came, he brought her along with him. The release was sweet and painful. She felt him throbbing inside her and she held onto him. She didn't allow him to leave her so easily. She wanted to remember the pain, the ache of this moment.

They laid together for moments. She completely ignored the knock on the door and the buzz of her cell phone. When Jack finally rolled over he fell asleep, he had a slight smile of his face. Sam studied it for a while before turning her back towards him. She laid there awake, completely aware of what had just happened. Somewhere during the night, Jack had rolled over and hugged her. The naturalness of this movement caused Sam to start crying. He had never made her feel cheap, not until tonight. And she had allowed him to. She had missed him so innately, that she didn't care how she had him. She didn't care how much like a whore it made her feel. She knew that he would never admit to it, but she knew that he had come for sex and not Sam. That he had come because she had become a safe pit stop to his home, to his wife. Not because he was in love with her. He had come because he had needed something and he knew that she wouldn't turn him away.

He awoke to her silent tears, very confused to why she was crying. The only thing he could think of was to pull her closer and kiss her shoulder.

You okay? He asked quietly.

Was all that she could answer. It was the cell phone that broke their moment.

Hello. Yes. Where? Okay, yeah I'll met you there. No. I'll call her. Yeah, an hour. Okay. He answered, hanging up the phone. We have to go. A girl was taken out of her room last night.

Sam started to sit up. She tried to act like nothing was unusual about this scene. But it was.

He asked again.

I'm fine. She answered back.

He turned her face around and made her look at him. Her red stained eyes were obvious even in the darkness. He kissed her forehead And pulled her towards him into an embrace. He started repeating that he was sorry, over and over again. Every word made her cry harder.

I'm fine. She mumbled into his shoulder. We should get going.

He finally let her go and followed her into the bathroom. Sam. I just missed you so much.

With that honest statement, she smiled. Me too. He came around her and hugged her once more.

We'll talk about this tonight, okay?

Sam closed her eyes, slightly angry at herself for letting him do this to her again, but then there was a slight feeling that she would always let him do this to her, as long as he was always there.