Blake's side was gently rested against the hard surface of the wooden door frame; her wide beaded eyes scanned his bedroom like owls in the night. A heavy sigh fell from her slightly parted lips as her hand gripped harder at the side of the door, keeping her balanced. Taking in the sights of his fairly messy room her mind was swamped with reminiscent thoughts and memories. Smells of burning candles and rose petals spiralled around her nose before dancing up her nostrils. The room had barely changed; he still had the same cream duvet cover, the same mahogany nightstand and the brown scruffy rug at the foot of his bed. The windowsill at the far left hand side of the room was still covered in photo frames. Though as her eyes bounced from one to the other she quickly saw that the photos within them had been altered; unsurprisingly. However what was surprising to Blake was that she felt her heart sink a little at the realisation. She had been replaced. None the less she had done the same with her photo frames; but it still stung her insides with pricks of sadness and hurt. She heard paced footsteps falling behind her, getting louder by each passing second.
"Hey." His voice was calm and soft; in a way it made her sadder that he clearly had no idea why her sleeping in here tonight would be more painful than expected.
"Hi" she smiled a half hearted smile as he arrived at her side. "You know I really don't have to stay in here tonight, I'll sleep on the couch, okay?"
"No, it's not okay." He grabbed her arm as she turned to leave, swinging her back to where she began. "I don't mind, really. And my couch is surprisingly comfortable!" He chuckled to himself at his poor attempt at a joke.
"You have no idea do you?" A slight tinge of anger now swirled around the heavy concoction of emotions that floated in the pit of her stomach. His head inched backwards a little as he pondered over her question. His eyes creasing in confusion and his brows furrowed, he replied
"No idea about...?" He really didn't have a clue and she'd be lying if she said it didn't hurt her. Keeping a brave face she smiled a smile that was clear to him it was a broken one.
"The last time we were in here, together. You don't...you don't remember?" Her eyes narrowed as she peered at him, searching his as his brain ticked and danced through the endless list of memories in his mind. She could tell when he'd stopped trying to remember, his eyes fell onto the floorboards beneath them, guilt passing through his bones as he swayed; placing his hands into the pockets of his trousers. She nodded, refusing to look at him she turned again, this time making it into the kitchen before he had a chance to catch up with her.
"I'm sorry, Blake. Tell me?" His eyes were sympathetic, staring at her with lips tangled into a soft, apologetic smile. Debating for a second or two, she opened her mouth to speak.
"Well we'd just woken up and I had just told you I loved you, and then you replied 'we're going to be together forever, Blake.'" She paused, her eyes quickly removing themselves from his piercing gaze. "It's stupid really; I don't know why I remembered it. Clearly you didn't."
He felt like he'd been stabbed in the heart, admittedly only by a very small knife that couldn't do much damage, but a knife all the same. He gulped in an attempt to let the guilt escape from him, but it didn't. And as she looked up at his face it was clear he felt guilty, it was drawn into the lines of his face and the shape of his eyes showed it too.
"I..." he stuttered, words not coming to his lips, he shook his head as he rubbed his forehead with his large palm. "I'm sorry, Blake." His chocolate eyes were plastered against her face, trying to lock with her reluctant ones that were anywhere but his. He wanted to say more, but the words were tangled in his throat and he had no idea what else to say, he waited patiently for her to reply, but she never did. "I am so sorry, I, I think I must've blocked it out, you know? Try and forget about it because I'm sure I would've remembered and I'm sure that morning and a lot of other memories would have been the reason I cried myself to sleep for weeks after I lost you." She gulped as her lips pressed together tightly, following the slow widening of her eyes and the falling of her brows as her teal eyes coated with salty tears. They stared at each other, their eyes becoming re-acquainted after months of abandonment. Her face stretched as a sigh poured through her throat from the base of her neck, eyes continuing to flicker about his slender face.
"I tried to forget." She admitted as her hands drew together from her sides, resting against her stomach, twiddling her fingers against each other. "But some things, you just can't forget. Well I couldn't anyway." She laughed a cheerless laugh as air was exhaled from her nose.
"Hey." He stepped closer to her, their bodies were merely inches apart; so close they were almost able to feel each other's breath on their faces. "Just because I did forget doesn't mean I didn't mean it with all my heart. It doesn't mean you meant any less to me than you thought, and it doesn't mean there aren't a whirlwind of other things I do remember. Maybe this one was just too painful, I had to forget it."
Her pearly eyes widened in surprise, her lips falling open as she stared into his deep brown eyes that were still rested on hers. Swallowing she let her head move a little closer to his, eyes flickering madly about his face. The new found proximity left his breath being blown against her lips, making her shudder as her heart fluttered; shivers sent soaring about her spine. His lips were pursed a little, his face displaying a far more serious expression than hers as he leaned just a little closer to her, his head tilting to the left as he did so. Her heart beats had picked up the pace and her chest was now heaving, his luscious lips only centimetres away from hers. His eyes drew shut, his head inching towards hers he could almost feel the material of her dress rubbing against his shirt. But before he knew it her body had darted backwards, eyes planted on the wooden floor of his kitchen as her fingers twitched at her sides.
"We...we can't." She breathed; her voice soft and delicate she faltered and stepped further away from his thumping heart. He twisted a little as his feet traced his steps behind him, running his fingers through his thick dark hair in defeat.
"Yeah. Yeah, you're right." The dim lighting of the kitchen highlighted their features; only their wide illuminated eyes and outlines of their noses and mouths were viewable, the rest dimmed out by the darkness.
"Okay, I'm...I'm gonna go." She turned, her blonde waves twisting as she did, falling gently onto her back, covering her bare skin exposed by the shape of her lilac dress. He watched her walk away from him, her hair bounced at each passing step she made as her hips swayed from side to side till she had exited the room and he was left alone in the darkness.
Blake had just finished up in the bathroom and was standing at the foot of the bed, ready to climb in when she noticed she had nothing to wear. Sighing at the realisation, she slid the dress down her thin figure till it fell into a crumpled heap on the floor. Deciding she would just sleep in her underwear rather than facing another awkward situation of finding Penn, she clambered under the soft, warm sheets and wrapped them around her half naked body. As soon as her head hit the pillow his scent encompassed her, running ramped through her nose it quickly spread throughout her being. A heavy sigh emitted from her lips as his scent took over her mind until her thoughts were totally absorbed of intimate moments they'd shared together; nights when she was wrapped tightly in his strong arms. Faint noises filled her ears, the sounds of footsteps grew louder and louder as she pulled the blanket tighter around her chest.
"Hi." His narrow figure arrived at the door, a dark silhouette in the shadows. "I just realised you have nothing to sleep in, did you want something to wear? I have some old shirts or umm…" He slowly made his way to the wardrobe, his hands gripped at the knob as he pulled it open.
"No it's fine, I'll be fine." She spoke, a little uncomfortable that he was only a metre or two away from her almost bare body, she flinched as she watched his muscles contort as he searched the wardrobe, hands pushing and pulling between his shirts and jumpers. "Penn really it's-"
"How about this?" He interrupted as he pulled a cotton brown jumper from his wardrobe, holding it up into the light so she could see it better. He really had no idea, did he? Sleeping in his bed was hard enough, but having to sleep in his clothes, reminding her of all those times she would slip on one of his old shirts in the winter made it even worse. Nights where his body was laid behind hers, his warm hands wrapped around her stomach; with his head resting at the crook of her neck as they fell asleep in each other's arms. She couldn't be bothered to argue with him and she didn't have enough energy to tell him why this was all so difficult; so she simply sighed at his efforts, reaching her hands out towards him.
"Sure, that'd be great thanks." He noticed the slight dismay in her tone, but chose to ignore it. Avoiding another fight he handed her the material of his sweater to her outstretched hands. "Thanks." She replied as she felt the soft cotton sift through her slender fingers.
"Sure." He smiled at her, his warm eyes landing comfortably on hers. Sensing a waft of awkwardness entering the room, he started to back away from the bed slowly, making a bee line for the exit, opposite to the large queen sized bed. "Call me if you need anything" He spoke as he reached the door, turning he caught her sliding the jumper over her breasts. His breath caught in his throat, lips moistening and eyes bulging; he stared at the sight in front of him. The hint of light that fell through the gaps in the blinds at the window perfectly framed her figure; her breasts looking even more magnificent than they normally did. Swallowing, he turned to leave, his fingers brushing against the doorframe as he turned in disappointment.
"Thanks, Penn." he raised his left hand in response, twisting his fingers to work as some sort of reply. He then slipped away into the shadows of the living room ahead.
It was vast approaching 2 am; the digital clock on her right hand side emitted a dim light into the centre of the room, creating sharp shadows on the ceiling. Her eyes were firmly fixated on the ceiling above her. Her eyes blinked every now and then as they stared ahead at the stillness of the blank wall. She hadn't slept yet, the familiarity of the smells that wafted around her nose and the haunting images that ran past her in the form of their younger selves flew past her eyes and danced around the frozen room. There were moments when she had almost succumbed to tears at the sight of certain visions of them.
Turning her head towards the en suite on her left she saw them wander slowly out the bathroom, like two little children they giggled as their hands jumped about each other's soaking wet frames, water dripping from the smooth bends in their bodies. He tentatively placed his hand on her waist, pulling her closer to his shivering self. Her lips met his mid smile as they stumbled towards the bed falling with a thump as their bodies instantly soaked the sheet. Blake twisted her head, she could almost see them there, laughing and enjoying each other's company like they didn't have a care in the world. She'd almost forgotten how happy they were together; a bright smile was always plastered against her lips when she was with him. He was once the light of her life; the one that cheered her on her darkest days, the one that kissed her till she no longer felt pain or sadness.
Following the dangerous path down memory lane her ears were not properly attuned to the outside sounds, and she hadn't heard him pacing about the living room. She could even see his dark shadows sway as he moved ahead of her; little did she know he too had been led through the depths of his past; nostalgia burning in the pit of his stomach at every fleeting memory that surfaced.
Two hot, sweaty coiled bodies lay twisting and turning on the couch ahead of his scorching brown eyes. He groaned as he detached his lips from her neck, heaving himself from her body to reach the phone behind her head. "Uh-uh." She pushed at his shoulders, tightening the muscles in her arms to get him back on top of her. "No, Blake I have to get the phone." The persistent buzzing caused the side table behind them to vibrate. He pressed harder against her resistant arms, his bare chest brushing against the white lace of her bra as his fingers gripped around the frame of his phone.
"Nooo" she pouted as his head hovered slightly over hers, phone in hand. He kissed her quickly before sliding his index finger over the face of the phone, lifting it up to his ear. "Oh hey, mom." He adjusted himself on top Blake's body, shifting to the left slightly so his right hand could balance himself above her, pressing deeply into the grey couch, while his left hand held his phone next to his ear. Blake scooted her body upwards so her back was closer to the armrests on the couch, her head only centimetres away from his heaving chest she leant forwards, kissing him repeatedly as her hands scratched at his back.
Despite his best efforts all his attention was on Blake busy at work, which resulted in a "Penn, are you listening?" from his angered mother. She giggled against the crook of his neck hearing his mom shouting down the phone while Penn flustered and attempted an excuse. She sucked at the skin at the top of his chest, tongue whirling around the dents in his body, marking the lines of his skin with her hungry mouth. He moaned as her eager hands reached at the zipper of his pants. Her slender fingers played with the zipper, occasionally squeezing at his hardening length. "Umm just uhh, just yawning mom. I uhh…I have I go." He stammered, letting the phone plummet to the floor as he relaxed the muscles in his arms, allowing his body to fall atop of Blake's again. He tightly locked his fingers around her wrists, raising them above her head. Hurriedly he smashed his lips against hers, assaulting her instantly with his tongue, demanding an entrance to her mouth.
Distancing himself from the figures on the couch he blinked away the memory; quickly noticing his pants feeling a little tighter than before. Rubbing his hands through his scruffy manes, he stood fidgeting in the living room, his feet twitching as he pondered on what to do. His mind told him to lie back on the couch and go back to sleep, but his heart; and the stiffness in his boxers told him to make his way to his bedroom. He didn't know what was wrong with him, he hadn't thought about Blake like this in years. But there was something about the fact she was lying half naked in his bed while they were both alone in his apartment that stopped him from thinking rationally.
By now Blake had lifted herself up so she was resting on her elbows. Worried he was awake for the same reason as her she felt her heartbeats quicken as a sea of emotions ran through her bones, gripping at her heart strings making it harder for her to breath. After letting her weakness have the better of her, desperate to see what the rest of the night had in store for them she coughed to alert him of her woken state. He gulped at the sound of his ex rustling in the next room. Excitement and intrigue fluttering through his being, he stepped tentatively across the room until he was facing the door into the room where she slept. In the flow of a second she saw his trim figure arrive opposite the door, standing stock still in the darkness. She couldn't make out the features of his face but she could see the outline of his bare torso and the lines of boxers that clung loosely to his legs.
She pulled herself out of his warm bed and slowly padded towards the door, breaking the distance between them. He watched her, eyes fastened tightly to her long, sexy legs, her blonde flowing hair that swayed by her sides. The gap between the two ex lovers was now getting dangerously smaller by the second. Blake's heart was fluttering dramatically as she could almost feel the warmth of his body radiating against hers as they drew closer at the corner of the bedroom. The picture frames that Blake had previously studied that night were the backdrop as their two silhouettes fell together, forming one large black shadow onto the wall, creating a contorted shape amongst the pictures behind them. Looking up, they searched each other's longing eyes that were both pouring with emotion and electricity. Penn opened his mouth to speak, but it took a while before the words managed to spill from his lips.
"I uhh...I couldn't sleep" He stammered, his eyes still glued to hers.
"Yeah, no me...me neither" her voice just above a whisper. She could feel her bones boiling and her heart on the edge of an explosion as her mind totally clouded over, leaving her unable to think with nothing other than her heart. Inhaling short sharp breathes more often than necessary her eyes lingered on his lips.
Like a sudden bolt of lightning he lifted his hands from his sides and yanked at her waist pulling her towards him, his hands sliding under her jumper in the process and grazing against her skin. Her body pulled directly against him, as their desperate lips met in the middle. As if a volcano had erupted between the two of them their lips immediately were groaning for more as their hostile hands ripped at each other's backs; yearning to be as close as humanely possible. Her lips tore away from his as she gasped for air, her head arching backwards as he attacked her neck with his lips. Moaning as his tongue explored the lines of her shoulders and throat. Her fingers gripped the warm skin of his back as he slowly kissed his way up from her shoulder blades reaching her soft lips once again. As their tongues tangled desperately in each other's mouths, he slid his hands from her waist to the supple skin of her bare thighs. Bringing her upwards, she clung tightly to his body, curving her hands against chest. Once locked around his waist, his agile feet stumbled backwards taking the two to his awaiting bed.
He planted her slowly, tentatively on the soft mattress, his body following soon after, he lay on top of her thin frame as he brushed a loose strand of hair from her face and placed it delicately behind her ear. She was in a trance, her eyes glazed with admiration as she watched him treat her like she was still his. His coffee coloured eyes sparkled in the gloom of his bedroom, so dark and still it was as if they were the only two entities in the world. A gentle sigh breezed through her lips as he placed his left hand behind her neck, pulling her towards his lingering lips. Transfixed by the pounding of her heart and the ever growing fire in her stomach he lulled her into a state of pure content. Her petite hands clawed and tugged at the curls in his hair, aching to have him closer to her. Despite the fact he could easily spend the entire night massaging and devouring her lips with his own, selfishly he wanted more of her. Missing the warm touch of her skin that caused his body to vibrate with anticipation at the feeling, he began to lift his jumper from her delicate frame. After revealing every inch of skin, he ran his lips across her soft stomach. Her beady eyes watched him eagerly as his mouth scattered about her body. As he hiked up her chest tantalisingly slowly, his heated lips reached the curve of her breast. He paused, his eyes dancing upwards till they landed on hers, his face decorated with lust and excitement she bit her lower lip catching it with her teeth; indicating for him to proceed. He repositioned himself so his head was hovering above hers as he yanked the brown jumper above her head so her underwear was the only thing standing between her and her naked body. Shimmering back down her lengthy figure he stroked her sides with his hands as he lips danced a playful dance around her breasts, teasing her flustered self.
Soft whimpers and sounds of desire poured from her lips, occasionally mixed with the purr of his name, which caused him to grip tighter at her waist and nibble against her skin as his mind ran ramped, his manhood hardening further at the thought of what was to come. She clawed at his back as she whispered his name, "Penn" he looked up at her, detaching his swollen lips from her chest. She wiggled her index finger, beckoning him to return to her distressed face. He heaved himself upwards, his body pressing against hers in the process. She locked her right hand behind his neck, tangling his waves in her fingers as she did so and drew his lips to hers. The kiss was slow at first as their mouths moved steadily against each others, but Penn soon broke away from her toxic lips only to deepen the kiss as he slid his tongue into her encompassing mouth. They moaned against each other's overpowering lips as they battled for control of the kiss. Running his fingers all over her warm stomach and supple breasts she moaned louder into his mouth, meanwhile digging her fingernails into his muscular back. He detached his enthralling lips from hers as he drooped his head so his eyes were keenly focused on her black lace underwear. Teasingly, he ran his fingers in loops around the underwear, gliding against her soft skin in the process.
As if in synchronisation with his hands, he shimmered slowly down her long, slender frame as he dragged her underwear down her legs until his hands met her feet and tugged them off quickly. By this time his head had reached the opening between her legs. His left hand was poised on her inner thigh; watching him with the upmost content she repositioned herself on the mattress so she was ready for what he was about to do. Drawing his pursed lips closer and closer to her core, she fidgeted about the mattress, anticipation climbing through her weak body that had already succumbed to his intoxicating touch.
Soon she was wiggling furiously about the bed, her cheeks turning to a shade of flushed pink as her hands grasped tightly at the sheet as she shook her head from side to side, loud moans and breathy gasps falling from her smooth lips. As her whines got louder and her whimpers began to echo around the space of his bedroom she tangled her petit hand in his wavy manes. His name came purring from her lips in a long gasp; luckily he knew exactly what that meant and withdrew his tongue from her moist centre. Looking down into his lustful, hazelnut eyes he pulled his head back up to hers, his warm breaths radiating onto her lips.
Gazing into each other's eyes it felt as though time had stood still, as she grazed his back with the pads of her fingers she hooked her legs around his strong back, one by one. He lifted his right hand from her soft waist and pressed it gently against her face as he cupped her cheek, stroking his thumb backwards and forwards as he brought his lips closer to hers. She could almost hear her heartstrings stretch and tighten as he leaned in, her stomach pounding with desire. Her soft lips were intoxicating; he could practically feel himself loosing complete control as her tongue swirled around his, her hands clawing at his back. Their beating hearts and their erratic breaths mixed with the all consuming feel of each other's desperate lips left them with only one thing left to do. After quickly removing his boxers, he pushed himself into her which caused her head to draw back slowly, as his lips met the base of her throat and the sides of her neck. Feeling as though she was on the verge of exploding with pleasure and satisfaction she moaned a moan that rumbled throughout his entire apartment, dragging each last sound through the walls of his building. Automatically they found a rhythm, their sweat coated bodies in synchronisation on his tangled sheets.
The pressure of her legs wrapped around his back caused him to pound himself into her faster. Her long drawn out whines and deep moans were noises he was more than familiar with; he had almost learnt what every sound symbolised and little did he know that some she saved only for him. Rocking their bodies against each other became almost ferocious as she began to speedily grind her hips against his feeling her body go through pleasure it hadn't felt in years. His eyes landed on her pearl red lips, and catching sight of them made him even more eager to have her; pumping at a faster pace he grabbed her neck and swung her lips against his; their tongue's swirled angrily together as they moaned urgently down each other's throats. Her body tightened around him, his warm hands gripping around her neck and brushing up against her upper thigh. The echoes from each other's names sparked around the room like fireworks in the night; repetitively falling from their lips as pleasure soared through their bones. Her eyes were bleeding words of lust as she separated her lips from his to catch her breath. Thrusting harder by the second she felt a climax rip through her body as yells of amazement and satisfaction rolled off her tongue as her hands loosened on his muscular back. "Blake" he screamed as she rotated her hips against his cock coming seconds after her. She let out a long exhausted breath as his sweaty body landed in a heap on top of her, his chest pressed firmly against her breasts as his head laid gently on her neck. Her warm hands combed his long wavy hair, the feeling of his warm breathes blowing against her chest blurred her judgement, her mind spiralling at the confusion of the lustful night.
"I'm sorry" he spilled, the words radiating against her neck as he rubbed the side of her waist with his left hand. Uncoiling his legs from hers he pulled his body away from her, falling to the side of the bed he hung his head back against the cool softness of the pillow. Her eyes brimmed with tears as she feared looking in his eyes would make the moment feel even more surreal. Blake let out a long drawn out sigh as the realisation of the last few minutes sunk into her heaving frame; her body streaming with heat she twitched her legs to try and cool herself down. "Blake", his voice was soft and calming, a polar opposite to the state of her thoughts that pumped around her brain. "Blake, look at me." He whispered as he reached his hand and gently placed it on her cheek, turning her head to face him. His messy hair fell to the sides of his face as he shifted his body so he was lying on his side, his gaze piercing hers. Reluctantly she turned to follow him, leaving them both lying opposite each other in a frozen state of confusion.
Her thoughts were rapidly blurred as he began to stroke her face, her heartbeats quickened at the warm touch. Like a spark to a match, her brain ignited with rational thoughts as she breathed a heavy sigh of his name. Being so accustom to the way Blake behaved he knew exactly what she was thinking, not only that but he knew exactly how to respond to her guilt stricken groans. "Come here", pulling her towards him she felt her limbs tighten in his grasp. Her firm hands pressed against his chest, pushing him away from her reluctant tremble. "Look I know what we did was bad, but right now we just need to sleep and then we can figure this out in the morning, okay?"
"Penn this is all way too familiar, I don't know what to do or how to act because I'm so used to wrapping myself up in your arms before we go to sleep and now I'm supposed to be doing that with someone else, and yet here I am, oh my god what have I done-" trailing off as it all began to sink in, ruthless tears swamped her eyes, clouding her vision she felt remorse seep through her body.
"Hey, hey" he whispered, crawling towards her, wrapping his arms tightly around her as he did so, warming her shivering frame. It scared her how natural it all felt, he had always been a shield to protect her from it all. Slowly she slipped her arms around his waist, locking them in a coiled bond under the cream sheets. Her eyes fell shut as she relaxed in his arms; her body loosened as she stretched her long, towering legs, sprawling them across his. A soft breeze of content washed over the bedroom, as their breathing slowed and fell into a repetitive pattern, chests rising at the same time. As she began to drift into a calmed sleep she heard the sound of his voice bounce around her ears "Blake?" She let out a small noise of acknowledgment. "It's gonna be okay." Smiling at the sound of his reassuring words she snuggled closer to him, replying a quiet "thank you" in response.
A breeze of nostalgia washed through the air, instinctively they hugged at each other tighter before they were lulled into a calm sleep; unbeknown to them what the future held.
Okay I'm sorry I've been so sucky at updating or just generally posting anything lately, but I've been working on this for so long and I really wanted it to be awesome, so I really hope it was worth the wait. And this may or may not be the longest one shot ever haha :p
I am slowly working through the next chapter of Two Years Ago but inspiration is lacking a bit at the moment, I'm not really sure where I'm going with the story, but now I'll devote all my focus to that fic so it'll hopefully be up in the not too long future.