This story is based on a request from raffig23. The basic idea was to write an angst story based on Figures by Jessie Reyez. The full prompt is noted at the end of the story, so it doesn't give the ending away.
Some angst ahead so be warned (I'm not that great with angsty stuff, but I hope you like it).
Beca Mitchell sat at the mixing table, headphones firmly in place, fingers on the board, and did...nothing. Her mind was not on her work; it was back home in the house she shared with her wife of 8 months, Chloe Mitchell (nee Beale).
After a few minutes, she threw her headphones off. "Argggh!," she yelled to the empty room.
She runs her hands through her hair and holds her head in her hands. "What did I do?," she thinks. It's been almost a month of Chloe shutting her down when she wants to hold her, or cuddle. Chloe always wants to cuddle. An entire month of Chloe only speaking when Beca asks her a question directly. A month of Chloe turning away from her in bed. Beca could feel the tears burning her eyes. She had no idea what was happening, and she was afraid that it was the beginning of the end of her marriage. She thought back to when it started
One Month Ago
It was late, but Beca was busy cleaning the house, getting ready for Chloe's return the next day. She's been gone for a week and Beca really missed her. She was dusting the mantle over the fireplace and smiled at the picture of the two of them on their wedding day. Beca shakes her head wondering how she got so lucky to have married someone as loving and caring as Chloe. It's been seven months and they've been the happiest seven months of her life. She put the picture back and heard the front door open and close.
She saw Chloe as she entered the living room and squealed. "Chloe! You're home early," Beca said. "I wasn't expecting you until tomorrow." She hurried, almost running, over to the redhead. She reached to pull her into her arms for a kiss and the redhead evaded her grasp, mumbling something about being tired. Beca's face fell and a look of hurt skimmed over her eyes. "Um, okay. Sorry. Let me take your bag upstairs for you."
Beca reached for the bag and Chloe snatched it away. "I can carry my own bag," Chloe practically snarled at Beca. She jerks the bag away from Beca and goes stomping upstairs, slamming the bedroom door.
"What the fuck just happened?," Beca asked the empty room.
Beca went upstairs to check on Chloe. She went into their bedroom and heard the ensuite shower running. The bathroom door was locked so Beca knocked on it only to hear Chloe tell to her go away. Beca sat on the bed and waited for Chloe to finish her shower. Chloe was startled when she came out of the bathroom about 15 minutes later wearing nothing but a towel. Chloe didn't say anything to Beca. She just went to the dresser and pulled out some sleep clothes and went back into the bathroom. She came out a few minutes later in her sleep shorts and an oversized t-shirt.
"Chloe," Beca said when Chloe wouldn't look at her. "Talk to me. What's going on?"
"I'm tired and I just want to be left alone," Chloe tells her.
"Come on, Chlo," Beca said and stood to reach for her. Chloe pulled out of her reach again and Beca felt the tears prickling at her eyes.
"I'm going to bed," Chloe said and pulled back the covers. She crawled into bed and got under the covers, pulling them up to her chin and turning her back on Beca.
Tears started to fall from Beca's eyes as she said, "Okay, if that's what you want. I'll be downstairs if you need me."
Beca sat there staring at nothing for a few minutes. She got an idea and pulled out her phone and opened up a new text.
Beca [10:04 am]: Hey. Can we talk? I don't know what I did but I want to fix this. Just tell me what I did wrong so we can start fixing it. Please?
Beca read the text a couple of times. She knows she sounds desperate but that's because she is. She hits send before she can change her mind. Her phone pinged about a few minutes later and she checked the message.
Chloe [10:10 am]: You didn't do anything wrong.
Beca furrowed her brow. That's it? That's all she gets? "If I didn't do anything wrong then what the fuck is going on?," she yells at the phone.
"Something I can help you with?," Stacie asked causing Beca to jump, not realizing Stacie had entered the studio.
"No. Yes. Maybe. I don't know," Beca said running her hands up and down her face and then through her hair. "Why are you even here?"
"I came to check up on you," Stacie said. "You've been out of it more than usual and I wanted to make sure you were okay. Are you?"
"I don't know," Beca said as she sat next to Stacie on her office couch still holding her phone in one hand. She looked down and started twisting her wedding ring. "Chloe's been, um, I don't know. Cold toward me for the past month. She barely speaks to me unless she absolutely has to. And, when we, um, go to bed she pulls away from me and turns her back to me. I can't sleep because I'm afraid I'll end up cuddling her and she's made it quite clear she doesn't want me to touch her. I don't know what's going on and I'm strongly considering moving into the guest room. The only reason I don't is that it feels like I'm giving up on us, so I end up spending most nights in my studio working on mixes to keep my mind occupied." She waves her phone around. "I just texted her asking if we could talk or for her to tell what I did wrong so we could fix it. All she said was 'you didn't do anything wrong.' I don't know what to do."
Beca let out a sob and Stacie gathered her in her arms. She hugged the distraught girl and kissed her on the side of her head.
"When did all this start?," Stacie asked.
"When she came back from her Teacher's Conference about a month ago," Beca said.
"Did you guys argue before she left?," Stacie asked.
"No," Beca said quickly, pulling back to look at Stacie. "It's been nothing short of awesome since we got married. The day she left we didn't want to let each other go. Every time she pulled away, I'd pull her back into a kiss and vice versa. Hell, the woman Chloe was riding with, um, Sarah I think her name was, was getting really annoyed with us and kept blowing the horn and yelling for Chloe to get in the car."
"Did something happen at the Conference?," Stacie asked.
"I thought that might be it," Beca said. "Chloe did fly back early instead of driving back with Sarah. She didn't even let me know she was going to be home early either. She always lets me know. When I asked her why she said she was really tired and didn't feel like spending 6 hours cooped up in a car." Beca wipes her face. "She usually can't wait to tell me all the things she saw and did on these trips. Whenever I asked her about the trip, she would just say nothing much happened, just the same old stuff. And now she's acting like she doesn't want to be there or want me there."
"Hang on, I'm going to text Aubrey," Stacie said. "Maybe Chloe said something to her."
Stacie pulled out her phone and sent Aubrey a text.
Stacie [10:22 am]: Hey, babe. Have you talked to Chloe lately?
Aubrey [1025 am]: We're having lunch today? Why what's up?
Stacie [10:26 am]: I'm with Beca. Call me.
About two minutes later Stacie's phone rang.
"Hey, babe," Stacie said answering the phone. "I have you on speaker."
"What's going on, hobbit?," Aubrey asked.
Beca tells her everything she just told Stacie. "I think my marriage is ending and I don't know how to stop it from happening," Beca said, her voice thick with tears.
"Hey," Aubrey said. "Let's not get ahead of ourselves here. It sounds like maybe something did happen at the conference and Chloe isn't ready to tell you about it."
"What could have possibly happened that she couldn't tell me about?," Beca asked through her tears. "She tells me everything. She used to anyway."
Beca begins sobbing now. Stacie grabs her again and pulls her to her.
"Hey, Beca. Hey! Come on. It's going to be okay." Aubrey tried to reassure her. "I'm having lunch with her in a little while. I'll see if she'll tell me or at least try to get her to talk to you about whatever it is. Don't overthink this. Just relax until there's something to freak out over. Okay?"
"Okay," Beca mumbles through her tears.
"Thanks, babe," Stacie said. "I'll see you at home later. Love you."
"Love you, too," Aubrey said. "And, Beca, don't worry. I'm sure it's nothing."
"Yeah," Beca said and Stacie ended the call. Beca sat there with tears streaming down her face.
"Hey, Becs," Stacie said softly. "It's going to be okay. If anyone can get Chloe to open up, Brey can."
"I was thinking while Aubrey was talking," Beca said. "What if someone said something to Chloe because she's married to a woman. You know how some people are with gays. Somebody could have said something to her and now she's rethinking being with me. She said she was straight until she met me. What if she doesn't want me anymore? What if she wants to find some guy to be with?" Beca lets out a sob and covers her mouth. "Maybe she already found someone and doesn't know how to end it with me."
"Beca, don't," Stacie said. "Don't do this to yourself. You're overthinking things. We're talking about Chloe here. Let's wait until we see what Brey finds out. Okay?"
Beca just nods her head and tries to stop the tears. She does not succeed.
"Come on, Becs," Stacie said, getting emotional herself. "You need to calm yourself down. You're going to make yourself sick." Stacie stands up suddenly, dragging Beca up with her. "Come on, let's go get some air. Maybe get something to eat. You'll feel better."
Beca just silently agrees and allows Stacie to drag her out of the studio. People were staring at Beca as she walked down the street wiping the tears from her face. Stacie knew there was a sandwich shop about two blocks from the studio and led Beca there.
*oOo*oOo*oOo*
"Hey, Brey," Chloe said as she joined her best friend. "Sorry, I'm late."
"It's okay," Aubrey said. "I haven't been waiting long. Are you okay?"
"What? Oh, yeah, I'm good," Chloe said sounding far from it. "Everything's just peachy."
"Really?," Aubrey asked. "That doesn't sound very convincing."
"I'm fine," Chloe said and sighed. "Could you just not today?"
The waitress came to the table and Chloe ordered a scotch. Aubrey raised an eyebrow and told the waitress she'd just have an iced tea. The waitress left to get their drinks and Aubrey looked at Chloe. Chloe was staring down at her hands in her lap.
"You seem a little out of it," Aubrey asked. "Have you already been drinking?"
"Not something for you to worry about," Chloe said with an edge to her voice.
"So, how are things?," Aubrey asked, making a mental note to come back around to the drinking at a later time.
"Things are good," Chloe said.
"If you're drinking scotch at 11:30 in the morning," Aubrey said. "I wouldn't say things were good."
"Things are good," Chloe said. "So, just leave it alone."
"Fine then. If everything's good why is Stacie with a freaked out Beca right now?," Aubrey said deciding to jump right in since Chloe was not acting like herself.
"Beca's freaked out?," Chloe asked looking concerned. "Why?"
Aubrey just looked at Chloe. Something was definitely wrong because Chloe is always in tune with whatever mood or freakout Beca was in.
"Get up," Aubrey said standing. "We're going to your house and you're going to tell me what's going on."
"Nothing's going on," Chloe said indignantly.
"Fine," Aubrey said and sat back down. "You want to do this here, let's do it. Why is Beca freaking out because you haven't spoken to her in two weeks?"
"I do talk to Beca," Chloe said defensively.
"Really? What was the last conversation you had with her?," Aubrey asked.
"We talked about what we were having for dinner tonight," Chloe responded quietly.
"How long did that conversation last?," Aubrey asked still not convinced. "Ten seconds? Twenty? How about before that?"
Chloe just looked down at the table, not saying anything.
"Okay," Aubrey said. "Why haven't you and Beca had sex since before you left for your conference?
Chloe blushed and swallowed, her mouth suddenly dry. "That's none of your business, Brey," Chloe said. "And I'm through being interrogated." She grabbed her purse and stood to leave.
"Beca thinks you're going to leave her because you found someone else," Aubrey said causing a teary-eyed Chloe to stop and turn to look at her
*oOo*oOo*oOo*
Beca and Stacie had been sitting for a minute or two, not saying anything, when the waitress came to take their order.
"I'll have a BLT on wheat," Stacie said. "And a diet coke."
"And for you?," the waitress asked looking at Beca.
"Just coffee, please," Beca told her.
The waitress leaves and Stacie looks at Beca.
"When was the last time you ate?," Stacie asked her.
"I haven't had much of an appetite the past couple days," Beca told her.
"You have to eat," Stacie said. The waitress brought their drinks. "Could you also bring her a BLT on wheat toast and a glass of water?"
"I'll put the order in right away," the waitress said and left them alone.
"You know you're doing what you always do," Stacie said. "Overthinking. Making everything out to be worse than it is."
"Yeah, well at least I'm acting like myself," Beca retorted. "Chloe's not."
*oOo*oOo*oOo*
Chloe let out a huge sigh and sat back down putting her elbows on the table and her head in her hands.
"I fucked up, Brey," Chloe said as tears ran down her face. "I really fucked up."
"Let's get you home and you can tell me about it," Aubrey said.
Aubrey and Chloe got up as the waitress came over with their drinks. Chloe grabbed the scotch and downed in one gulp. Aubrey paid the waitress for their drinks, giving her a hefty tip as well. Aubrey followed Chloe outside.
"I'll follow you home," Aubrey told Chloe. Chloe just nodded her head and they both got into their cars and drove off.
*oOo*oOo*oOo*
"Do you think Chloe told Aubrey anything?," Beca asked Stacie as they sat in her studio.
"She may still be having lunch," Stacie responded. "I haven't heard anything from her yet."
"What if-"
"Stop! Just stop, please," Stacie said running a hand through her hair. "How many times do I have to say don't worry about anything until there's something to worry about."
"That's easier said than done," Beca mumbled. "Stacie, I love Chloe with everything I have. I don't know what I'll do if she's found someone else."
"Did I ever tell you about the time Brey almost broke up with me?," Stacie asked.
"What?," Beca said. "No. You never told me that."
"Well," Stacie said. "One day Brey came to the lab to surprise me and take me to lunch. She came in just as Gary, this guy that works with me, grabbed me up in a hug and kissed me on the cheek. I didn't know she saw us. She came in like everything was fine and we had lunch. For like the next week she was really distant. Not talking much and definitely not doing much of anything else."
"So, what happened?," Beca asked.
"One night, just after dinner, I was talking about work and I mentioned Gary," Stacie said. "She lost it. She got upset and started yelling at me about cheating on her and said if I was going to leave to just go ahead and go. That she didn't want to be with someone who didn't want to be with her."
"It wasn't what she thought," Beca said.
"No, it wasn't," Stacie said. "She said something about the hug and kiss. I laughed which made her even madder. I told her that Gary was going to propose to his girlfriend and asked me for some help. I helped him shop for the ring and gave him an idea on how to propose. He did and she said yes, and that was why he hugged me at work. To thank me for helping him. So, you see, Beca, things are not always how they look."
"I get it," Beca said. "I just-." She runs her hand through her hair in frustration. "It's just it took me so long to finally realize, and admit, my feelings for Chloe, I'm afraid she'll realize I'm not good enough for her."
"Oh, Beca," Stacie said. "Why don't you go home and wait for Chloe? Make her talk to you. It's the only way you're going to know."
"You're right," Beca said. "Thanks, Stacie. I'll, um, text or call you later."
"Okay," Stacie said. "And don't start off by accusing her of anything. That will just put her on the defensive and you'll never find out what's really going on."
"I'll try not to," Beca said.
Stacie left the studio so Beca could finish whatever she had been working on when she arrived. She texted Aubrey to see if she found out what was going on with Chloe.
Beca saved her work and gathered her stuff. She told her Assistant she wasn't feeling well and was going home. She sat in her car for a few minutes before she drove home.
*oOo*oOo*oOo*
Chloe let Aubrey into the house and dropped her stuff by the door. She went to the bar and poured herself of a shot of Tequila and downed it. She poured a second and downed that one as well. She leaned against the bar and let the burn of the alcohol course through her veins. She looked up to see Aubrey watching her.
Chloe walked over the sofa and sat down. She put her elbows on her knees and head in her hands.
"Come on, Chlo," Aubrey said. "Talk to me."
Chloe let out a humorless laugh. "Now you sound like Beca."
"She's just worried about you," Aubrey said. "And, I'm starting to worry about you, too. Something's wrong and Beca can sense it and so do I. What's going on?"
"Sit down," Chloe tells her. Aubrey sits and Chloe takes a deep breath. "I need to start at the beginning. Just let me get through this before you say anything. Can you do that? For me?"
Aubrey looks at her for a moment, worried about what Chloe is about to tell her. She also knows that Chloe needs her to be her friend and do nothing but listen.
"Okay," Aubrey said. "Start whenever you're ready and I'll stay silent until you've had your say."
Chloe becomes teary-eyed as she sits there. Trying to find the best place to start with what's been going on. She wipes a tear that fell down her cheek.
"About 3 months ago the school got a new teacher," Chloe said looking down at her hands in her lap. "Her name is Sarah and she teaches third grade. We formally met when she brought her class for their music lessons. We hit it off immediately because she also has a love of music. She started coming to my class during lunch and we'd talk. I didn't think much of it until one day about a 6 weeks ago she started to leave and tried to kiss me."
Chloe looked at Aubrey when she heard her gasp. Aubrey's eyebrows shot up and she opened her mouth to say something but snapped it shut immediately. She just nodded at Chloe to continue.
"I pushed her away before anything could happen and she got pissed," Chloe continued. "I told her I was happily married. She said I was giving her signals that I was into her. I didn't, Brey, I swear I didn't. I love Beca with all my heart, you know that."
Chloe watched Aubrey who was sitting with her arms crossed over her chest, rigid and tense. Chloe could feel the tension emanating from her body in waves.
"Go on," Aubrey said through gritted teeth.
"I thought that was the end of it," Chloe said. "She even apologized the next day and said it wouldn't happen again. I avoided being in my classroom when it was lunch time because I didn't know what else to do. She finally got me alone a week before the Conference and she apologized again and said that we were starting to be fairly good friends and she missed that. We talked a bit more and I felt like things were really okay. So, when she offered for me to ride to Sacramento with her and two other teachers, I agreed. The day we left, Beca was being her goofy self and would grab me and kiss every time I started to get in the car. It was like a game and it was so silly and cute. Sarah was getting irritated and blew the horn at us and yelled for me to get in the car because we had long drive and she wanted to avoid as much traffic as possible. Beca finally let me go and we drove off. Sarah made a few snarky comments about Beca but I ignored her because Dani and Janice were saying how cute it was and they could tell that Beca and I loved each other very much."
Chloe stopped and rubbed her temples, trying to ease the headache she was getting. Aubrey shifted in her seat and waited.
"The conference was going well and we were having a good time," Chloe said. "Two nights before the end of the conference a bunch of teachers from all over decided to hit a bar that had karaoke. The next day was a free day before the closing ceremony and it was karaoke so, of course, I went. We all sang and starting ordering drinks. I remember Sarah kept bringing me drinks and I don't know exactly how many I had, but I was somehow drunk, very drunk in a short amount of time."
Chloe stopped and put her head in her hands again before she continued. "We all sang a few more songs and that's all I remember until I woke up the next day." Her voice softer and sounding more fragile than Aubrey had ever heard her sound before. Aubrey got up and moved to sit next to Chloe. She rubbed Chloe's back and said, "Go on."
"When I woke up it was already afternoon," Chloe said. "I felt like I had been on a three-day bender or something. I looked around and tried to figure out how I got back to my room and then I realized I was naked."
Aubrey closed her eyes and could feel the tears at their corners. She knew where this was going.
"I got scared," Chloe said. "I didn't know why I was naked and how I got to my room. I jumped when I heard the bathroom door open, afraid to see who was going to walk out. It was, um, it was Sarah and she was naked, too."
Chloe let out a sob and Aubrey pulled her into a hug. "Did you two? You know?," Aubrey asked softly.
"Yeah," Chloe said. "It was obvious we did, especially when she came over and tried to kiss me on the mouth. I pushed her away before she could. I couldn't process everything and had to jump up and run to the bathroom to throw up. When I was done, I put on my robe that was hanging on the door and came back out; she was still there. She laughed at me and said something about not being able to hold my liquor. She was still naked and just lounging back on my bed like she owned the place. I told her to get out. And she laughed again."
Chloe became fidgety at this point, so Aubrey waited for Chloe to continue.
"She said something along the lines of doing it again before we leave," Chloe said and swallowed the bile that rose in her throat. "I told her that I was happily married and she was a drunken mistake and it was never going to happen again. She picked up one of those GoPro cameras off the night table and got up and started walking toward me. She had this look on her face that scared the shit out of me. I didn't know what she might do. She stopped in front of me and did something on the camera. Then she held it up to my face."
There was silence while Chloe tried to compose herself and not empty the contents of her stomach all over the floor. "She showed me a video of the two of us having sex. I pushed it away and she laughed, it was an evil laugh. And then she said, 'If you think this is the last time I get to fuck you, think again. If you refuse, your little wifey will be getting a copy of our little romp.' Then she tried to kiss me but I turned away. She shrugged her shoulders and got dressed and I just stood there not knowing what to do. When she was fully-clothed she went to the door and stopped before she opened it. She turned to me and said, 'I always get what I want and I want you. You can keep the wife if you want. That doesn't bother me. But I will have you again or she'll find out the hard way about us.' And then she just walked out. I showered and then packed up my stuff and went to the airport to catch the first flight home I could get."
Chloe got up and went to the bar and downed two more shots.
"Do you think that's a good idea?," Aubrey asked. "Especially with what happened the last time you got drunk?"
"Don't judge me, Aubrey," Chloe snapped at her best friend. "My marriage is about to be over and getting drunk is all I have right now."
"Chloe," Aubrey said feeling bad for the redhead. "I'm sorry. I'm just worried about you. And Beca."
Chloe just nodded her head and sat back down on the sofa. Aubrey sat for a moment, gathering her thoughts before she spoke.
"You know, this is exactly what Beca was afraid of," Aubrey finally said. "How could you be so fucking irresponsible? In the past even when you were super drunk, you didn't sleep with just anyone."
"I don't, I don't know," Chloe said. "I was missing Beca. And I know that's no excuse. I don't want to believe that I willingly had sex with someone else even if I was drunk. But she has a video and she's going to tell Beca." Chloe started crying again.
"Did you watch the video?," Aubrey asked.
"No, I pushed it away as soon as I saw what looked like us having sex," Chloe said. "I didn't want to see any more of it."
"Could she have staged it?," Aubrey said. "Made it look like something it wasn't."
"I wish I could say yes," Chloe said. "But, I don't know. I don't think so." Chloe sobbed and the tears fell harder.
Aubrey held Chloe as she cried. "You need to tell Beca," Aubrey said. "I think she needs to know."
"How?," Chloe said. "She'll never trust me again. She'll leave me and I don't know what I would do if she did."
"I think you need to tell her," Aubrey reasoned. "She loves you, Chloe. You'll be able to work through it. Just tell her."
"I can't tell Beca that I cheated on her," Chloe said loudly, pulling away from Aubrey and standing.
She felt rather than heard Beca and she slowly turned to find Beca standing in the doorway, a single tear rolling down her cheek.
"You cheated on me?"