Smile for the Camera
Author: Aggered
Summary: LilyJames. They all expect her to push him away or tell him to get a life, but his arm is warm and reassuring against her back. She compromises.
Notes: Written in two hours, unbetaed, but I really needed to get this plot bunny out of my head. Thanks for reading.
It's an early birthday present from his parents – the latest, most expensive camera on the market. It's all shiny and lovely and red and gold and as the card read, "perfect for the last year of your Hogwarts experience!"
But Lily Evans decides very quickly that the camera is not lovely and not perfect – it's only very annoying. All the rest of the Gryffindors ooh and ahh over it, but she purses her lips in the corner of the common room and pretends not to care. Because she does care – oh, about the camera, sure, but mostly about the idiot holding it. The idiot named James Potter who is supposed to be next to her going over prefect patrol schedules and smiling at her and flirting with her while she tries to stop herself from reciprocating.
She gathers up her papers, deciding to head to the library rather than stay and listen to the clamor. She's halfway to the portrait hole when she hears his voice over the crowd. "Evans, wait up! Moony, over here!"
And suddenly James Potter is next to her and he has his hand on her back and smells lovely and is tall and – is smiling at the camera that Remus Lupin is facing toward them. Lily registers the grins of the people around her – all of these people expecting her to push him away or tell him to get a life – and she weighs that against the reassuring warmth of James's arm around her, all while Sirius Black counts down. 3. 2. 1.
She compromises as Remus snaps the photograph. She stays where she is, but she adopts a petulant frown, and as James moves away to take the developed photo from Remus, she's already gone. But she hears the howl of laughter from James's friends as she slips through the portrait hole.
20 minutes later, she has her head bent over reports and schedules, but she's gotten absolutely nothing done. She feels guilty – not because she thinks James is legitimately hurt by her attitude, but because he deserves better from her. For all of his forgetfulness and inattention, James Potter is actually a really great Headboy. A really great guy. As in – so great that Lily has become rather smitten with him, even if she can't properly express her feelings. Yet. She will, one day. Soon.
But she despised James Potter with every fiber of her being for almost 5 years, and she still has trouble processing that the blush that stains her cheeks when he comes near isn't from anger any longer, but something entirely different. She just needs a little more time. But at the same time, she admits, even if she isn't ready to give much else, she could have at least smiled for the picture.
She's thinking about how to make it up to him, her stack of reports forgotten, when James himself stumbles into the seat next to her, breathing hard. "Evans," he gasps, clutching at the table to steady himself, "I completely forgot!"
She's so startled by his sudden appearance that it takes her a while to respond. When she does, all she says is, "…you didn't have to run."
His head is bent as he tries to catch his breath, but he looks up at her through his eyelashes and, after a pause, says sincerely, "I didn't want to make you any angrier." He thrusts a hand into his jeans pocket and comes up with the photograph they took earlier. She takes it from him. It would have been a nice photo, she thinks, because James is beaming and lovely and so ridiculously happy – except that she's there frowning and tapping her heel against the floor impatiently, and really, how much more of a killjoy can she be? "I know I disappoint you, Evans," James continues earnestly, and oh, yes, she's blushing now because he's got a hand on her shoulder and he's looking into her eyes like he's never seen or said anything more important. He plows on, barely stopping for breath as he says, "I hate disappointing you and I wish I could say I'll never do it again but the truth is that I'm such a screwup that I don't think it's possible for me to stop disappointing you but I swear I'll try to do it less often and I promise I'll remember our meetings and I promise not to get distracted and…I just really hope you're not too angry this time…" He trails off weakly, dropping the hand on her shoulder.
She rather liked having it there, but all she does is look down and attempt to respond. "James," she starts, but then stops, because sweet Merlin, how much more horrible to him can she get, and how can anything she say even begin to make amends? She takes a deep breath. "James, you don't disappoint me," she tries, and the surprise in his face pricks faintly at the back of her eyes. "You're doing a great job; it's me who's being a bitch and making you think otherwise."
He's speechless for a moment. When he does speak, his voice is hoarse. "You're not a bitch, Lil."
She could argue that point, but she's tired and he's adorable and has got that stupid camera hanging by its strap around his neck, and she suddenly has a great idea. She takes it from him, and stands up, tugging at his hand so he follows. She winds through the aisles until she finds a Gryffindor first-year.
"Do you mind?" she asks, offering him the camera. The first-year nods, eager to please. Lily turns to James. "Let's try this again," she says, and now she's the one with her hand on his back because James is apparently too stunned to do much else but nod absently at her suggestion.
3. 2. 1.
She sticks around this time to see the picture. They're both smiling this time, except that James's is wistful and he keeps twisting his head to look at Lily's profile in wonderment. Lily is embarrassed, but pleased with the result, and she turns eagerly to see James's expression. He's smiling, but not at the picture. He's smiling at her, and this realization makes Lily's cheeks feel warm again.
"You're amazing," he says softly.
And it's more than she deserves, but she won't argue the point – she will, however, argue another point by saying, "You, too." The blush that rises in his cheeks makes her day.