Author's Note: Be attentive and you'll find a parallel with the "City of Glass" :)
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IT'S A DEAL
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"Aren't you going to tell me a lie that you arehappy to see me?"
Two minutes ago Jace let him be Lightwood knocked on the Magnus' door, a minute and a half ago he put his shoe in the doorway so Magnus couldn't slam the door right before his face, one minute ago he sat on the couch in the living room, and now he sits here and doesn't want to drink tea, which Magnus didn't want to give him.
Actually, Magnus has something to answer: from "I never tell lies" to "Get the hell out of here, you, little annoying bastard", but, first of all, Magnus can be an "annoying bastard" himself and, secondly, Jace probably would find something to object to his "I never tell lies".
Something like "Well, and is this the reason why you told my brother you never would be able to lose him?"
"Hey, feel free to say it's nice to meet me," Jace says again as if that had any sense.
"What do you want from me?" Magnus asks instead. He decides it's better to ignore these antics. "It seems to me like I've already told Alexander that I don't want to deal with you all anymore."
"Yeah, I know," Jace nods and what he thinks about everything Magnus told Alexander is written in his eyes.
Again, it has nothing in common with "I never tell lies".
But Magnus continues to have it his own way. "Then I have no idea why you came here."
Jace looks at him, his smile is so fucking sassy that it makes Magnus want to erase this smile from his face, erase not by some spell, but by hands, despite the fact Magnus can't even remember the last time he did it. Magnus shakes his hand carefully, looking at knuckles, and doesn't pay any attention to the charge that sounds in Jace's voice.
"This is not only our war. This is your war too."
Yes, it's possible to agree because if Sebastian wins, the world will never be the same. Maybe, there will be no world anymore, but Magnus likes to think he has enough power to hide from this war wherever he wants.
Except Peru.
So Magnus is agree with Jace, but he raises his eyebrows and asks all the same. "Mine?"
Jace shrugs. "Warlock, if you forgot about this, I'm ready to recall you," he says, his voice cold. "I'm ready to recall you that you were by our side enough time to make Sebastian know about you were by our side. Do you think he leaves you alone after all?"
Leaning back to his chair, Magnus stretches. Chairman Meow climbs to his knees and starts to purr.
Magnus has no idea what they are doing here and what the reason and aim are.
Well, as for him, he lives here and either does Chairman Meow, and Jace, he just sits here and annoys everyone, but what is the point of this conversation? And why the hell didn't he slam the door right before Jace's face pushing him away with the magic?
Oh, shit. Feels like a right time for inner voice come and it comes. It starts to whisper about how wonderful it would be to ask Jace about Alexander, and, just to shut this inner voice up, Magnus says, "If Sebastian wants to get me, he will have to find me at first."
Seriously, why would Sebastian want to get Magnus Bane? The son of Valentine doesn't need the High Warlock of Brooklyn, he just settles his scores. Like "hey, you didn't want to love me when I was a child, so you will be afraid of me now" or "if you don't want to kneel before me, I will cut your legs off so you won't have a choice" or "if you don't want to give me your world as a gift, I will burn it down to the ground". His only interest is revenge and maybe power, but Magnus really has nothing to do with this stuff.
If Magnus hadn't been in love with Alexander, he wouldn't even have been involved in this nasty business.
If Magnus hadn't been in love with Alexander…
Jace stares at him, his face impenetrable. "Believe me," Jace says, "He'll find you."
Magnus doesn't immediately understand who Jace is talking about, but when he realizes that the answer is only "Sebastian", the disappointment covers him with his head.
And then, after this disappointment, curiosity comes. Like, what it would be? What it would be if it weren't Jace who came here, if it were Alexander? What would happen if it were Alexander who put his foot under the door and Magnus, of course, hadn't enough resolution to slam this door at the moment? What would they talk about?
For several long seconds Magnus tries to imagine Alec saying this "Believe me, he'll find you", but then he realizes that their conversation wouldn't come to this point. Well, there wouldn't be any conversation at all because Magnus would kiss him right by the door.
With Alec's back to the wall and the clothes rack falling down, with Magnus trying to put Alec's old sweater off and stripping his nail-polish by the buckle of Alec's belt, and with them both going to bedroom but falling on the next coach, and…
Jace waves his hand in front of Magnus' face. "What? Your visions again? I mean, the rivers of blood and so on and so on—"
Magnus blinks, shaking his head. "No. He doesn't need me," he says without any knowledge of is it Sebastian or Alexander he is talking about. "I'm not you; there is no angelic blood in my veins, so nobody cares about me."
"You have the White Book instead."
Does he really think Magnus doesn't remember? And what does he want from him? Is he searching for help? For collaboration? Does he expect Magnus would like to become their pet warlock again? Or does he expect Magnus would be afraid of Sebastian? Maybe, he wants Magnus to give him some book to read or his place to hide some guilty Shadowhunter again?
Magnus would be about to say he is sick to death of this conversation, if he wasn't sick to death before this conversation even started.
"I'm glad to find you are so interested in my library, Nephilim," he says, standing up. "But I don't think that your so-called brother would pay the same attention to it. So, if you finished—"
"No, I didn't," Jace says, but stands up all the same. It seems like he doesn't mind to leave Magnus alone, and that's pretty strange. "Our Team Good isn't really a team without you, but I wanted to discuss something else."
"And what did you want to discuss?"
Of course, Magnus already knows the right answer. And, of course, he doesn't want to discuss this, but Jace isn't a type of person who cares about others' opinion.
"Why did you break-up with Alec?"
"It's not your business."
"He's my parabatai, so it is."
What Magnus didn't ever expect of himself is this old, inveterate and furious jealousy. It comes and rushes forward, it's huge and angry as a wild dog is. This dog bites Magnus' ribs and tears him to pieces. Magnus wishes he could bend to the ground, at the first time for his eight hundred of years just bend to the ground or better fall down on his knees and stop this empty existence, but he can't.
"Well," he says slowly, "so maybe you shouldn't ask me? Maybe you should ask Alec? If he is your parabatai—"
Jace smiles, and Magnus realizes he wants to slap his face. Now. So he clenches his fingers to fist and grabs his wrist with the other hand to hold back.
This is a provocation, so it would be very, very, very and thousand times "very" stupid to do this, but since Jace, Clary, Alec and Isabelle first came through his door he always does very, very, very and thousand times "very" stupid things and it seems like there's no opportunity to stop this.
Going back to his corridor, Magnus doesn't really care is Jace going with him or he isn't. But Jace is. And his mouth doesn't shut up for a second.
"Actually, I've asked him already," Jace says. "But his answer didn't look like a reason, if you want to know my authoritative opinion."
I don't give a fuck about your stupid opinion, Magnus thinks. Oh, by the Angel!
He doesn't say any word, just puts his hands behind his back against every eventuality and snapping his fingers let the door open.
"Do you know what I think?" Jace asks from the threshold and looks at Magnus, trying to see his reaction. "I think that you don't want to tell your secrets, so you decided to break up with Alec because—"
Magnus strikes.
Later, when Jace, rubbing the blood off his face, gives Magnus a derisive look and finally goes away, Magnus presses his forehead to the wall and freezes. He stands here for a long time, and there are many thoughts swarming in his head and many words dancing on his lips, but he's silent.
Knuckles are smarting.
Chairman Meow is rubbing against his legs.
An ordinary day in the life of Magnus Bane. One more fucking day.
It may be regarded as a significant date because today is the day when Alec hadn't called him for a week and a day and thirteen hours and twenty four minutes.
Not that Magnus is going to answer, but… Alexander doesn't call him.
Magnus knows he should be happy because that's really good if Alec forgot about him and doesn't feel bad anymore and, maybe, met someone else… Well, honestly, whom is he trying to swindle?
The only thing that keeps Magnus from calling Alec himself is his pride.
The only thing that keeps Magnus from getting drunk and asking Chairman Meow why did he screw all this up doesn't really exist.
The only thing that keeps Magnus from getting drunk and calling Alec is a different story. So Magnus gets the third attempt to press the right buttons and waits, asking himself what was the point of deleting this number if he knows it by heart all the same.
There's no answer.
Just a couple of short tones and then a mechanic voice tells him something he can't understand now, and Magnus presses the cancel.
Everything is going to be okay, he thinks. All is well.
The only thing that keeps Magnus from running to the Institute or even running to the Institute without putting his coat on is that if something had happened to Alec, they would have told him.
Wait, Jace was here. What for? What did he want from him? Was he searching for help? For collaboration? Did he expect Magnus would like to become their pet warlock again? Or did he expect Magnus would be afraid of Sebastian? Maybe, he wanted Magnus to give him some book to read or his place to hide some guilty Shadowhunter again?
Or, maybe, he wanted to say that something had happened?
Magnus shakes his head. It feels like his thoughts are running in a circle as if someone turned his head to a huge merry-go-round and there is no way to get off.
His hands are shaking a bit, and it reminds Magnus of Jace's lips under his fist. Magnus thinks about how easy it was to hit this smiling lips and how sweet it was to erase this smile from his face. Magnus thinks about how painful it was when his knuckles met Jace's teeth and how perfect it was when the blood colored Jace's impudent face with bright red.
Magnus just can't understand why Jace doesn't hit him back.
And what was the reason for Jace to come here is the second thing Magnus can't understand.
"Aren't you going to tell me a lie that you are happy to see me?"
No. He isn't going to lie, because it is not a lie. That's strange and maybe even ridiculous, but Magnus was really happy to see Jace let him be Lightwood because Jace is bound to his Alexander.
Two warriors who fight together. The bond which is stronger than blood tie. Two warriors who are closer than brothers. A narrow, stretched rune, a couple of strokes binding two people to each other once and for all till death won't do them apart.
Honestly, Magnus simply envies them. It turned out that there was no "once and for all" for him and his Alexander.
His?
Well, his own binding rune, a faded certificate of battle in Alicante and that kiss in front of everyone's eyes, is stinging as if he spread some gun-powder on the fresh wounds and let it all burn. This rune doesn't leave him in peace, it hurts him all day and all night, so Magnus stretches his sleeves to the fingers as Alec usually did.
Probably, Alec still does.
Probably, Alec still looks at everyone, hiding behind his long fringe, and still frowns so the vertical wrinkle between his eyebrows makes him look older. Probably, he still shrugs and smiles so the most beautiful eyes in the world start to shine. And he shoots his bow with no blunder, and he drinks his tea warming his palms by the cup, and he shifts from one foot to the other when he's feeling nervous.
And he doesn't call Magnus for a week and a day and thirteen hours and thirty five minutes.
Magnus knows he should be happy if Alec is proved to be able to move on and get over this or at least to start to move on and get over… Moreover, Magnus knows he should move on himself, but he utterly and completely puts his own treatment in the hands of time letting this time do whatever it wants to.
Anyway, he perfectly knows there is anything time can really heal.
Anyway, he doesn't really want to be healed.
He acts like Jace and he knows it. The same pose, the same aspiration for misery to punish himself and feel himself guilty. That is destructive and stupid, and that's why Jace has always annoyed him so much.
They are too similar. And there can't be two divas in one room at the same time.
Maybe, that was the reason why Alec wanted him? Maybe, Magnus was just a replacement of Jace, but he didn't cope with a task?
This thought is swinging on the balance for some time, and when Magnus recalls Alec's face in the darkness of subway, he is almost ready to consider this idea too stupid, but then the words of Jace come to his mind.
"He's my parabatai."
And the mad dog inside of Magnus starts to rush his ribs again.
Hissing, Chairman Meow jumps away.
"I'm sorry, honey, I'm sorry," Magnus whispers, reaching his hand to a cat, but Chairman Meow doesn't put his head under his fingers.
Chairman Meow looks at the door.
Chairman Meow waits.
When somebody makes a noise on the well, Chairman Meow runs to the door and rubs his head against the threshold, waiting for Alec. When the step of another Magnus' client are heard on the stairs, Chairman Meow runs to the door and rubs his head against the threshold, waiting for Alec.
It hurts Magnus even more than his own waiting does, and in contradiction with his own waiting he cannot do anything with Charmain Meow's one.
As for his own waiting, Magnus tries to act like it doesn't exist.
The key word is "tries".
Magnus dials a familiar number again, and it doesn't seem out of place anymore. Alcohol thinks for him and alcohol is absolutely sure there is nothing wrong with drunken calls to ex-boyfriend even you have no idea of what you are going t to say. And, moreover, alcohol whispers to Magnus' ear that drunken calls to ex-boyfriend are the real way to make the past become present if you only use this way right.
If you do everything right.
"Right" is when Alec closes his eyes from the pleasure. That's when Alec blushes, reaching to Magnus, feeling shy because of such an open reaction. That's when he bits his lip and looks somewhere above Magnus' shoulder or passes his fingers over Magnus' back, softly outlining the line of his spine.
Or when he says "Yes".
Alec, by the way, always says "Yes". No "Hello" or "Good morning, it's Alec" or even "Listening" when Magnus is calling. Only "Yes" and it always seemed to Magnus very sexual and symbolical.
But this time his Alexander doesn't answer at all.
And holy shit, he has to stop calling him his Alexander.
Chairman Meow gives him an inquiring look, and Magnus has no choice but to answer: "I don't know, sweetie. I just don't know."
And then – to stand up and find out.
Magnus puts his leather coat on and anyhow wraps himself into this, with shaking fingers tying his belt up. It would be better to do all buttons up, really do all buttons up – right under his neck, that would look strictly and laconic, pretty elegant, it would really fits him very well, but his fingers are too drunken to do this.
Really, his fingers are drunk. Only fingers are drunk, but Magnus is sober as a judge, there's no doubt.
He makes his collar look better and stares at the mirror. The reflection divides in two, and both parts are smiling and pulling terrible faces as if the mirror was laughing at something, and Magnus decides he looks like an idiot without a scarf. He winds up the blue one (the very blue one which still smells like Alec) and it pleases himself.
Magnus rumples his hair and the sparkles left on his palm are enough to create his own Universe. But he doesn't want fucking Universe, he needs Alec, so he turns the lights off and goes to the well. Magnus forces his way into handrail of the stairs and that's so painful so he has to waste some time standing here and trying to catch his breath. Leaning against the handrail, he tries to collect his own thoughts.
At the end Magnus makes a conclusion that this little accident wouldn't be able to stop him and comes downstairs, whistling something from the OST to the "Gilligan's Island".
Magnus is going to come to the Institute, find a love of his life and ask the love of his life why he hasn't call him back.
All this reminds him of something, but he can't find out of what it reminds.
Well, Magnus doesn't really try to find out because now it's more important to catch a taxi. By the way, when he uses a taxi, it always means to erase driver's memory later. That's just a question of safety.
"The question of caution," Magnus tastes this phrase.
"Did you say something?" driver asks over seat.
Magnus shakes his head saying no. Safety and caution, all this is not about him. Magnus is going to find the love of his life and he doesn't care about caution and safety.
And – well, - he is drunk. For a little.
When the car finally gets to the place, Magnus feels really sick, but there still cannot be the slightest doubt that he will get what he wants. His plan is as simple as genius, and perfect, and wonderful, and so on and so on, and Magnus is so proud of this plan so he discovers there's something wrong with the Institute only when the car goes away.
Okay, taxi and the driver couldn't help him anyway.
What can be really useful is soberness, but…
Screwing his eyes up, Magnus stares at the familiar outlines.
"Stupid gargoyles," he summarizes. "An example of nasty taste, if you ask me. It would be much better without—"
Only after dozen of steps Magnus realizes that this is not "stupid gargoyles". There are demons, real true demons, the very demons which he is able to summon or which he saw on the streets of Alicante those days. The disgusting, nasty, dangerous demons, the very demons which he already used to kill.
But those days Magnus had Alexander right behind his back.
And now Alexander is not around. Now Alexander probably is in the Institute, fighting and shooting, slowly walking between the ashes and bodies of demons, rising his bow up after every rustle and every movie… And he has Jace right behind his back now.
Clenching his teeth, Magnus runs to the Institute.
The only barrier, the door which can be opened only by Nephilim, is open, and it reminds Magnus of something again, but he doesn't care. It's not time for the memories and it's not time to be jealous: his shaggy dog doesn't howl inside of him and doesn't try to eat his ribs anymore. This dog stands at attention, its ears are raised, and draws the air in searching for something between the smells of burning and blood.
Searching for the smell of sandalwood. Alec's smell.
All these eight hundred of years Magnus trusted in books, magic and people he shouldn't have trusted. Now he trusts in his own instincts so these instincts lead him between the hills of grey ashes and bloody imprint on the walls right to the heart of the Institute where a thin voice of arrows is heard.
He gets to the right room at the proper time. Here is Alec, his back to the wall, and there's no Jace around him. There are just bow in his hands and the arrow on the bowstring. This is the next to last arrow.
So Magnus strikes. He doesn't stop to think, he doesn't even need to think. He is drunk and he worries about his Alexander, so instead of thinking he jumps and the blue fire springs from his fingers. This fire burns all demons down to the ground as if it was longing for battles.
There is no other way from this room so… two seconds – and Alexander is next to him.
"What are you doing here?" he asks, gasping for breath, and Magnus notices that Alec's black sweater still looks like brown and… it's burning.
That's weird. That's not the way it all was before, and Magnus enjoys it, but snaps his fingers to stop the little blue fire all the same.
"Thank you," Alec says, looking at Magnus from under the brows. "You just saved my life."
Again it reminds Magnus of something, and suddenly he feels like all of his powers are leaving him. Leaning against the wall and thinking he looks like an idiot, Magnus says slowly: "You haven't called me for a week and a day and thirteen hours and—" He closes his eyes for a moment. "Well, no, fourteen hours and seven minutes."
"What?"
Magnus repeats.
Alec looks at Magnus as if he'd lost his mind. "You just saved my life. The Institute is under attack, and I bet it's the fault of Sebastian, and you say I haven't called you for a week and a day and fourteen hours and seven minutes?"
"Almost eight."
And I have a strange feeling of déjà vu.
Alec laughs. The Institute is under attack, and probably it's the fault of Sebastian, but Alec laughs.
"Alexander," Magnus says through his teeth, "What was the reason?"
"Jace broke my phone because I called you too much."
The mad dog inside of Magnus knew it. But this dog isn't going to bite Magnus again, it's just listening to Alec's voice and whining a little.
Magnus missed this voice so damn much.
"Fuck your Jace! I knew it!"
"Fuck your Jace?" Alec narrows his eyes. "He thought it would be better for me! And it was you who said you love me, but it wouldn't change anything."
Magnus frowns. "Did I say that? No matter. Now I want to tell you—"
What exactly he wants to tell stays unknown. At that moment a dozen more demons floods into the room.
"Damn it!" Alec says. He has one arrow on his bowstring and one in a quiver behind his back.
Magnus follows his gaze. The demons are already fanning out into a half circle around them, their yellow eyes glowing. "Way to change the subject, Alexander."
"Let's talk about this later." Alec takes aim.
Magnus shakes his hands, his fingers shining with individual azure flames. "You know what—"
"What?"
"We live through this, and I promise I'll do everything to make you understand I was wrong."
Alec takes the shot with his bow and smiles.
"Okay," he says. "It's a deal."
Fin~
