Museum of Curiosities and Danger

It was the tiny flicker of light in the darkened room that first attracted Clara's attention. She caught a brief flash of bluish-green from the corner of her eye. Looking about she realised that the Doctor had wandered off, again. Honestly it was like herding cats with that man sometimes; six year olds had better sense than he did.

'Doctor?' she called out, her voice echoing slightly. She flashed her torch about, hoping to catch a glimpse of his tall, thin figure but no luck. All she could see were small displays of alien artefacts scattered about the room. She had no idea what they were; they could have been a display of domestic toasters for all she knew, or ray guns. That was the thing about alien stuff, you never knew what they were until you saw someone using them. 'Where did he go?'

There again, that little flicker, it was more pinkish-blue now. Clara looked about for the Doctor again, biting her lower lip. Flicker, flick, it had changed yet again to a yellow-orange. Clara made up her mind, two could play at this game, if the Doctor thought he could just wander off without so much as a warning then so could she. Grinning at the thought of what she might find in the next room Clara walked around the corner.

The next thing she remembered was being rudely shoved to one side.

'Clara!'

'Ow!' Clara rubbed at her arm, where she was fairly certain she would find a big bruise in the morning. 'Why'd you do that for?'

'Why?' the Doctor stood in front of her with his arms crossed and a scowl on his face. 'Oh don't mind me I was just saving your stupid life.'

'From what?' Clara caught a glimpse of yellow-green light from over the Doctor's shoulder and tried to step around him.

The Doctor matched her movement, keeping himself between Clara and the light. 'From that.'

It was Clara's turn to cross her arms. 'And what's that when its home then?'

'It's not at home and you should consider yourself lucky, because that,' the Doctor jerked a thumb over his shoulder, never for a minute taking his eyes off Clara, 'is a Begustrian Light Catcher, very rare, very dangerous.'

Clara lifted herself up on her tiptoes, hoping to catch a sight of this thing. 'Why's it so dangerous?'

The Doctor frowned at Clara's actions. 'Think Venus Flytrap only it eats people instead of bugs.'

Clara slowly lowered herself back on her heels. 'Oh,' her eyes widened at the thought. 'No, wait a minute how can that possibly work, I'm not a bug; I'm not just going to walk up to a –' she gestured towards the Doctor.'

'Begustrian Light Catcher,' he answered for her. 'Except that you did.'

Clara frowned, 'Meaning?'

'How long do you think you were standing there looking at the pretty lights before I came along?'

Clara shrugged, 'I dunno, a few seconds.'

'Try at least twenty minutes, any longer and you'd be getting your insides sucked out like a milkshake right about now.'

Clara's laugh was a little strained. 'That's not possible.'

'No?' the Doctor snorted, 'Light Catchers, they're aptly named because they catch their prey using light. A form of hypnotism it projects directly into the brain, stuns its prey and then they lure it in close enough to snatch it. Don't believe me?' The Doctor turned to face the Catcher, grabbing Clara by the arm as he did so and pulling her forwards to stand beside him.

The light was dazzling, it flickered quickly from one colour to the next, Clara sighed at the sight but it was suddenly partially blocked by the Doctor's hand, his fingers spread in front of her face to dull the effect.

'Now,' he explained to her, 'Watch.'

The Doctor reached into his pocket and pulled something out. He quickly tossed it towards the dark shapeless mass that was all Clara could see of the Begustrian Light Catcher hiding behind it's bright light. Thick dark tentacles shot out and snatched at the object the Doctor had thrown. Coils looped over the bundle and quickly drew it back into the Catcher's centre. The light that had captured Clara's attention suddenly went dark.

The Doctor leaned over the spoke into Clara's ear. 'You're welcome and you owe me lunch.'

Clara breathed out slowly as she realised what might have happened if the Doctor hadn't come along when he did. She frowned, 'Hang about, you weren't affected. You were staring at the lights too.'

The Doctor tapped the side of his head. 'Superior intellect, flashing lights don't impress me.' He began walking away from the Begustrian Light Catcher deeper into the museum.

One last glance over at the now dormant plant and Clara hurried after the Doctor. 'Did the Catcher thing invade the museum or something, is that why we're here, to stop it?'

'Of course not you wanted to visit a museum, remember?' the Doctor said. 'And besides it's one of the exhibits.'

'What?' Clara stopped walking in the middle of the room. 'No seriously, what?'

The Doctor realising that Clara wasn't following him turned around and walked back to her. 'You wanted to visit a museum and,' he raised one hand, fingers pointing towards the ceiling, 'you wanted to see it after it was closed, something about not wanting to stand around in queues.'

'I might have mentioned it once, months ago and I was referring to seeing the Mona Lisa at the Louvre.' Clara glanced at all the objects scattered around the room. She found herself wondering what else might suddenly spring to life. 'Not some people-eating plant.'

'Ah the Mona Lisa,' the Doctor smiled, 'she had magnificent eyebrows, almost as good as mine.' He gestured towards his face. 'No idea why Leonardo refused to paint them. Lovely fellow Leo, smart for a human,' the Doctor leaned forward, lowering his voice. 'I think he might have fancied me.'

'You thing everyone fancies you,' Clara said, sighing.

'Well,' the Doctor flicked his jacket open, flashing the red lining as he spun on the spot. 'Can you blame them?'

'Don't change the subject, how can that plant be an exhibit, it's not exactly safe.'

'Clara,' the Doctor took two steps back and threw his arms out to encompass the whole room. 'It's the Museum of Curiosities and Danger. Don't act so surprised, it's in the name.'

'Well, why isn't it confined or something?'

The Doctor dropped his hands to his side. 'Oh, you like that kind of museum do you? A place for everything and everything behind glass. Signs everywhere saying "Don't Touch" "Don't Run" 'Use Inside Voices Only",' the Doctor snorted dismissively. 'Boring!'

'At least is would be safe then. You can't exactly take a school field trip to a place like this.'

The Doctor shrugged, 'Why not?'

'You're seriously not asking me that question.'

'Evolution in action, survival of the smartest.' The Doctor began walking away. 'Admit it,' he turned his head to address Clara who had followed him; 'there have to be a few students you wouldn't mind letting loose in a place like this. You could raise the entire school's IQ in just one trip.'

Clara smiled slightly as the faces of a few of her more annoying students flickered through her mind before she cleared her throat and tried to look serious.

'Aha!' The Doctor caught Clara's brief smile. 'I knew it.'

'You're incorrigible.'

The Doctor nodded. 'It's one of my better qualities.'

Clara shook her head. 'No its not, now why are we here exactly?'

'You wanted to see a museum remember?'

'I wanted to see the Mona Lisa.' Clara corrected.

The Doctor stopped walking and turned to Clara. 'Fine, I'll take you to see the real thing, in the flesh. You can stare at her all day if you want but don't be surprised if she slaps you. That woman has quite the temper.'

'Somebody's going to get slapped and it's not me.' Clara snapped back at him.

The Doctor grinned. 'Oh you'll get along famously.'

'So why this museum?'

'Hmm,' the Doctor moved away from Clara and began walking into the next room. 'I wonder what's through here.'

'So getting a slapping.' Clara muttered.

'Clara,' the Doctor called out from the next room. 'You wanted to see some portraits?'

She found the Doctor standing in the middle of a large gallery, hands on his hips. All along the walls was portrait after portrait, each hung under their own individual light. No need for her torch here. Some were elaborately constructed; others seemed to be just pencil sketches. There were humans and aliens and even what seemed to be some amorphous blob. Each and every portrait seemed to be staring down at Clara.

'You know how everyone says that the eyes follow you about the room?' the Doctor asked as Clara stopped beside him.

'Yeah, always found that a bit creepy.' Clara answered as she rubbed at her bare arms where goose bumps were beginning to form.

'Oh, then you're going to love this.' The Doctor stretched out one hand and gestured to the paintings on the walls. 'Welcome to the Gallery of the Spirit Painters.'

'Spirit Painters?'

'Passing fad that lasted for a couple of decades in the late 29th Century.' The Doctor nodded towards the nearest painting. 'Take a closer look.'

'Alright,' Clara looked from the Doctor to the paintings. 'Why not?'

'Spirit Painters alleged that they could capture a part of your soul and incorporate it into the painting.' The Doctor explained as Clara walked over for a closer look. 'The claim was by adding your spirit it made the painting come alive. It was promoted as a form of immortality.'

'Just looks like a painting to me.' Clara said, coming to a stop in front of the portrait of a reptilian alien. She frowned and crossed her arms, rising on her toes to get a closer look. Clara suddenly stepped backwards with a gasp.

'See something interesting?' The Doctor asked.

'It looked at me.' Clara whispered. She leaned to her right and watched in shock as the alien turned it's head to follow her.

'Try the next one.'

Clara looked sideways and realised that the bright red human in the next painting was also staring right at her. She moved over to the painting and sure enough both the gaze of the alien and human tracked her every movement. Clara hurriedly walked backwards, never taking her eyes off the paintings, until she was standing next to the Doctor again.

'They're all doing that.' The Doctor said, quietly. 'Every one of them is looking at us.' He shoved his hands into his pockets. 'Go view a Spirit Painters gallery and the paintings will look back at you.'

'That's horrible.' Clara rubbed her arms hard. 'Are they alive?'

The Doctor shrugged. 'No one is sure; they only know that it's not just the eyes that really follow you.'

'And the people who posed for the portraits,' Clara looked up at the Doctor, 'what about them?'

'They seemed normal enough, acted like they always had. But after a while they began to complain that the paintings were talking to them, judging them. So most of them took the paintings down off their walls and hid them away.'

'Gives me the creeps.'

The Doctor leaned down and whispered to Clara. 'Me too,' standing straight he continued in a normal pitch. 'Legend says that one person destroyed their portrait and later mysteriously died. After that no one wanted to sit for the Spirit Painters anymore and the fad just stopped.'

'How did the paintings end up here?'

'No one dared destroy their portraits in case the rumours were true, even after the original portrait sitters died of natural causes their descendents didn't want a thing to do with the paintings in case there really were alive. There's nothing like wasting the family fortune while great-aunty Greta stares disapprovingly down at you from the wall.' The Doctor gestured about the room. 'So they ended up here and in a few other places, sitting for eternity on a wall. Immortality after all.'

'Right,' Clara gave an exaggerated shiver, 'and I'm never going to look at a painting in the same way again. Let's get out of here.'

'Good idea.' The Doctor gestured towards a doorway at the other end of the hall. 'After you.'

'Thanks heaps.' Clara hurried towards the doorway keeping her eyes averted from the portraits the entire time.

'I love a good museum, don't you?' the Doctor asked as they walked past some sculptures that made Clara's eyes water.

It reminded Clara of the works of Escher, those weird drawings that seemed so impossible they used to make her head hurt as a kid trying to work them out, only instead of paintings they were made out of some sort of pale greenish stone, twisting and turning in on themselves – some even seemed to disappear into the walls only to return metres away from the original sculpture.

'You know you still haven't told me why we're here.' Clara said.

'Have you got pudding between your ears, I told you.' The Doctor threw his arms out wide and gestured about. 'To see a museum!'

'Yes, but why this one?'

'Did I mention it's called The Museum of Curiosities and Danger, why not this one?'

'Oh for –' Clara stopped walking, 'I'm not moving until I get a straight answer.'

'Oh really?' the Doctor's eyebrows rose at Clara's words. 'Then you might be waiting a while.'

'I mean it.' Clara stated as she watched the Doctor walk away from her. 'Not moving an inch.'

'Have fun then.' The Doctor wiggled his long fingers over one shoulder as he walked out the room. 'Try to avoid getting eaten.'

'You can't just leave me here!' Clara yelled after him, fighting an urge to stomp one foot. 'I can't believe he just left.' She grumbled as he disappeared around a corner.

Clara looked about at the sculptures. Drumming her fingers on her jeans she considered her options. Stay here and wait for the Doctor to come back, which let's face it he probably wasn't going to do. In fact she wouldn't put it past him to forget she was even here and leave without her. Option two was to run after him like a good little girl and pretend everything was fine, Clara snorted at that idea. Which left option three, go off and do her own thing, find out whatever it was the Doctor was here for, because Clara was convinced he had come here for some reason, and beat the Doctor at his own game. Clara grinned at that idea, option three it was then. She walked over to the door leading out of the sculpture room and saw there were two corridors to choose from; now which one had the Doctor taken? It was no point venturing off only to accidentally run into him in the next room.

'I'm still not moving.' She shouted loudly.

'Fine by me.' Came back a faint reply from her left.

Clara smiled. 'Gotcha,' she muttered, flicking on her torch as she began walking down the other corridor.