Little
girl was down by the waterside
The
sun so hot and the roses so red where she lie
As
little boys sit and watch as she twirls all around
Sunny
smiles not a raincloud could bring that girl down
But
now....
"C'mon, go do it!"
"Shhh, she'll hear you, Padfoot!" James said, eyes bulging.
"Why are we here?" whines the scrawny one, Peter.
"So Prongs can ask Lily to the Spring Dance, idiot!" exclaims Sirius.
"Just look at her…!" James sighs.
"Er… Prongs? Hoy! You there, Prongs?" Remus asks, waving his hand in front of James' face.
"He's in la-la land," Peter informs them pompously.
"No, he's in love," corrects Sirius.
"Am not!" James shouts back, a bit too loud.
"James?" Lily looks around the sandy bank. She stops, narrows her eyes and puts her hands over her hips. "James Potter, if you're hiding in those bushes, I will find you!"
"AH! Attack of the Mutant Lily! Quick, go out there, Prongs!" hisses Sirius.
"No!" James hurriedly whispers back.
Not willing to take no as an answer, Sirius gives James a shove and he, Remus and Peter quickly retreat. "Sirius…" he says, gritting his teeth nervously.
What's
behind those big brown eyes
Do
you dream at night
Without
your lullaby
"James Potter!" Lily shrieks, pulling the branches away from the bush. "How long have you been spying on me?"
"Erm… hi, Lily!" James says, standing up. Maybe it was because Lily Evans, the most beautiful girl in the world, was standing in front of him, or because he had been crouching in the same position for fifteen minutes, but James' legs were weak and shaky.
Arms crossed over her chest, Lily scolds him. "What are you doing here?" she yells. "Were you planning on playing a hoax on me, Potter? Because I'm really laughing… HAHA!"
"Get a grip!" James says, finally finding his voice. He has never seen such a beautiful, yet cross girl before. Lily's normally pale cheeks redden and she tightly clenches her fits at her sides.
Lily blinks at James' request. "Me… get a grip? This coming from James Potter… I'm not the one who was playing spy from behind a bush! Tell me what you want, or leave me alone!"
"I-i, er, I wanted to ask you something, Lily," James mumbles.
"What was that?" Lily asks, lowering her voice dangerously, expecting an insult or retort.
"Go to the dance with me?" James' says, quicker than Lily can fully understand.
"Did you just ask me to the dance?" Lily asks, dumbfound. James nods stupidly. She looks up into his face. Lily sees the boy who dyed her hair purple in their third year; the boy who could top her in Transfiguration, but couldn't keep his own hair combed straight.
"…Well?" asks James.
Lily continues to stare into James' brown eyes, trying to understand him. Could this be the same James Potter who transfigured her cat into a huge, hairy tarantula less then a month ago, as a joke? Could he be the same James Potter, co-Gryffindor, sixth year prefect, rouge? Now it was Lily's turn to sputter. "Um, er… Okay, James."
"Really?!" James shouted. Lily nodded, trying hard to ignore the
cheering bushes nearby.
Little
boy sits alone as he sings in the dark
Wondering
if his own dreams had pulled them apart
He
sings a song of tomorrow he never can see
Mostly
sings of a lost little girl's memory
And
Now...
"Lily, dearie…"
"James, you can't play Quidditch for a living!"
"And why not?" protests James.
"I'll tell you why not, James Potter. Ever time you get on that filthy broomstick, I have a heart attach… don't you dare try to interrupt me! When are you going to grow up? Don't you ever think of our future?
"What do you want me to do, Lily Evans?" James shouts.
"I don't want you to do anything! Forget it… forget everything! I don't love you… just forget you!" Lily blinked furiously, trying to hold off the hot tears burning in her eyes. She hadn't meant a word of what she'd said. She did love James.
"Just tell me Lily! Do you want me to work at the ministry? You want me to fight Voldemort? You know…" he says, imitating Lily's voice… "Do it for our children, James." Lily felt the quick rush of blood filling her cheeks.
"No! Forget you, James Potter! I don't care if Voldemort curses you to shreds… who cares?
"I care!" James shouted. "I thought I loved you, Lily… I guess it was just some charm you put on me!"
"Charm? Ha! You just wish you were as good as me in charms, James Potter. I made no such spell and you know it. Don't you try and take anything you said back, either!"
"Don't worry, I'm not!"
Lily gave out a pitiful sob and began to cry freely. She
wanted to slap James hard across the face and hug him all at the same time.
It didn't make sense anymore… nothing made sense anymore.
As
his dreams go flashing by
He
begins to hear
A
lonely lullaby
The last full moon before graduation. Sirius paces the dorm, reviewing the upcoming night's plans. James stares, and doesn't listen to a word he says. "Prongs?"
"He had a fight with Lily," pipes Peter, trying to be helpful.
"Shut-up, Wormtail!" Sirius snaps, knowing very well why James isn't listening.
"She was right," says James sadly.
"Who was right, Prongs?" asks Sirius, knowing the answer.
"Lily…"
"Of course she was right! She's such a know-it-all, perfectionist!" Peter says.
"You're really not helping, Wormtail!" Sirius shouts.
"I was only trying to make James feel better… geez, Sirius!"
James ignores them both. "She was right," he repeats. "I can't play Quidditch for a living. I do have to fight Voldemort for our childrens' sakes."
"Children?" pipes Peter, dumfounded.
"Oooh, bad Jamesie! Does Lily know?" Sirius, always trying to lighten the mood, says.
"I'm sorry, Padfoot, Wormtail… I have to go see Lily." James says, pulling himself off his four-poster.
"Now?" What about Moony… our plans?" asks a very devastated Sirius.
"I'll meet up with you in a little while, okay?" Reluctantly,
they nod.
James pauses outside the seventh year, girls' dorm. He hears the
unmistakable sound of Lily sobbing and singing. Her soft, buttery
voice melts his heart. Slowly, James turns the creaking knob…
Well
now
We
used to sing
And
we used to cry
Through
everything
In
our children's lullaby
Years later... "James, I'm going to put Harry to bed," announces Lily. She stands and stretches her aching back, softly humming a lullaby to the sleeping child in her arms. James nods, half-listening, his nose stuffed in a Quidditch magazine. It was getting late, and he would head up to bed once Lily had safely tucked Harry in.
Watching Lily cradling Harry renewed James' desire to protect his family. To James, Lily is truly the most beautiful woman; her long, wavy, deep red hair streamed behind her and green eyes sparkled. Harry, as Sirius liked to joke, was a mini James. He had the same messy, unmanageable black hair and bad vision as his father. His eyes, though, were his mother's.
Lily disappeared into the next room with the baby; the same baby which
Lord Voldemort, the darkest Wizard of their time, wanted dead. It
frightened James to death that someone more powerful than him wanted Harry's
life; he tried to console himself. But Peter would never tell…would
he?
Little
girl on the street with nobody around
Has
her head in the air dirty feet on the ground
She
shuts her eyes and she wonders is this a mistake
Now
she's gone from the warmth of her little boy days
And
still...
Lily lies awake, face streaked with tears. She stares out the high tower window at the moon, crying as softly as possible. Between sobs, she chokes out:
"I see the moon, the moon
sees me
The moon sees somebody
I want to see
God bless the moon and
God bless me
And God bless the somebody
I want to see.
It seems to me that God
above
Created you for me to love
He picked you out from
all the rest
To be the one that I loved
best.
I had a heart 'twas true
and good
But now it's gone from
me to you
Take care of it as I have
done
Cause you have two and
I have none."
"Lil, that you?" called a hesitant voice.
"Yes," cries Lily.
"Go to sleep, Lil. James will apologize in the morning, I'll put ten galleons on it!"
Lily looked at her roommate's bed. The curtains were drawn around
the four-poster. "But I don't have ten galleons," laughs Lily, temporarily
forgetting that she was supposed to be crying. When her friend did
not answer, Lily realized that she had fallen back asleep.
She
believes that she'll get by
On
her own without
Her
little boy's lullaby
James dozes in his comfy armchair by the fire in their cozy home called Godric's Hollow. Harry's whales can be heard from the nursery.
"James, a little help, dear?" cries Lily across the house.
"Lil, sing him the dream fairy," shouts James. He settles back into the chair and strains hard to hear what is, even though he is over twenty years old, his favorite lullaby.
"A little fairy comes at night,
Her eyes are blue, her hair is brown,
With silver spots upon her wings,
And from the moon she flutters down.
She has a little silver wand,
And when a good child goes to bed,
She waves her hand from right to left,
And makes a circle round its head.
And then it dreams of pleasant things,
Of fountains filled with fairy fish,
And trees that bear delicious fruit,
And bow their branches at a wish."
As Lily completed the song, she pulled out her wand and sent silvery
sparks around Harry's crib. He reaches up and tried to grab them,
but as his tiny fingers touch the silvery sparks, they disappeared.
After repeatedly doing this, the baby yawned and his large sea-green eyes
close.
Little
boy prays to God to answer his song
To
hold her hand when everyone else's are gone
Time
goes by and the wounds slowly turn into scars
So
he makes his final wish on the midnight stars
And
he screams...
A sharp bang alarms James in his armchair. Eyes wide, staring at the door, he shouts:
"Lily, take Harry and go! It's him! Go! Run! I'll hold him off--"
"James, I can't just--"
"You have to! Now go!"
"James... if it were just us..."
"I know, Lily. I know."
The door bursts open and James holds his wand out in front of him. "Stay away from my family," he shouts.
"AVADA KEDAVRA!"
His final thoughts are of Lily and Harry. They are okay… Lily
apparated to safety… they are okay… please God, let them be okay!
Little
girl won't you hear my cry
Won't
you come back home
To
your lover's lullaby
A single tear runs down her cheek as the lethal curse echoes throughout
the house. Holding Harry close to her chest, Lily knows deep down who will
be next. The loud explosion wakes Harry and he begins to cry.
Fighting back the tears, Lily rocks her child in her arms and closes her
eyes. She recalls her life...
"Lily, don't cry," whispers James. He emerges from the shadowy dorm entrance. Her face is illuminated by the moonlight; her green eyes and cheeks doused with tears.
Unable to speak, Lily looks away and continues to cry. James sits down beside her and gently wipes the tears from her eyes with his fingers. Cradling her in his arms, James quietly sings, his voice rich with emotion,
"I see the moon
The moon sees me
Under the shade of the old oak tree
Please let the light that shines on me
Shine on the one I love.
Over the mountains
Over the sea
Back where my heart is longing to be
Please let the light that shines on me
Shine on the one I love."
"That's beautiful," whispers Lily. James nods and they embrace.
"I love you, Lil, and you were right." James states as a simple apology, this time without a single gurgled word.
"I wasn't completely right… but get out of here before I take off five points from Gryffindor!" she says sternly.
"Yes, Professor McGonagall," James chuckles, rolling his eyes.
Lily narrows her drying eyes, but before she can say a word in her defense,
James kisses her rosy lips. "Goodnight," he whispers as they pull
away.
Later, Lily lays awake looking out the window. Far below, the moonlight reveals a beautiful stag wandering the grounds. It seemed to be staring up at her every so often. But… how could that be?
* * *
Lily scrounged her face to keep her eyes shut; trying in vane to hold
on the perfect image of James. No! James is dead.
When all was lost, James had always been there. James is gone!
Lily held Harry as tight as she could to her bosom; she knew what she had
to do. She was going to sacrifice herself for her child; she was
going to sacrifice herself for the entire Wizarding World. Voldemort
was going to fall…
Little
girl down by the waterside
Goodbye
"Not Harry, not Harry, please not Harry!"
"Stand aside, you silly girl… stand aside, now…"
"Not Harry, please no, take me, kill me instead—"
Not Harry! Please… have mercy… have mercy…"
Disclaimer: Children's Lulaby belongs to Vertical
Horizon and the copyright: Song: © Lucky Skunk music. J.K. Rowling
owns all HP characters and themes. No one knows who wrote the moon
lullaby, but there are about 100 versions and I got those two online. I
know another really sweet version, if anyone cares to hear it…