She's in Love with Me & I Feel Fine

by Halawen

Clare is living with, dating and falling in love with Paige. She harbors both the secret that she's bi worried about how her friends and especially her family will react, and the secret that she's a published author. After running into two familiar faces at the wildest party of them all she finally works up the courage to tell her family and friends. One shot fluff & smut.

Welcome to tonight's shot!

Legal: I own nothing but the idea.

All the things to know before reading:

*Adam did not die but did break up with Becky when the Baker's went back to Florida that summer

*Clare did have cancer

*Eli did cheat and they broke up

*She dated Drew for the rest of senior year but never got pregnant

*Paige moved to the California Bay Area after leaving Toronto

*San Francisco is referred to as The City (like New York is called the Big Apple)

*The Exotic Erotic Ball no longer happens but it does for this fic

*This is all in Clare's pov

The rest is explained in the shot enjoy!

She's in Love with Me & I Feel Fine

My fingers are typing away so rapidly on the keys the computer almost isn't keeping up with me. I should be doing homework but I got inspired for my book and now I'm lost in it, I can see the vision so clearly in my head the real world has disappeared and all I can see is the scene for my book. I click the keys hurriedly to keep up with the scene playing out in my mind trying to translate it to the page in words as clearly as I see it. I'm in another world now and I don't even hear the front door opening, I don't feel lips against my cheek or hear the annoyed huff when I don't react. Even when the lips move to my lips and I can no longer see the screen I keep typing. Fed up with me not paying attention Paige moves to the other side of the sofa and stands at the end, taking off her jacket she lifts her blouse and bra flashing me and now I laugh.

"Paige you broke my concentration," I scold her as she fixes her clothes.

"Well something had to, you barely even reacted when I kissed you. I hate when you get into writing trances like that and just block out the rest of the world. Sometimes I swear the apartment could catch on fire and you'd never even notice," she responds taking my ankles and lifting them up, she sits and puts my feet in her lap.

"I know and I still have a couple hours of homework but I got inspired and just had to get it down. The pressure of making this second book as good as the first is weighing on me," I sigh.

"Hun the book will be fantastic, besides the way you're going you're going with school and the book you're going to fry your brain. Which is why I got us tickets to the Exotic Erotic Ball," she informs me.

"That sounds frightening," I reply twisting my mouth.

"It's a ton of fun and if you're worried about someone recognizing you then you can wear a mask, a lot of people do," Paige tells me taking the laptop and setting it on the coffee table.

After graduating DeGrassi I came to UC Berkley and a few months ago ran into Paige in The City. I recognized her instantly although I had only met her once and seen pictures of her, I couldn't remember her name though and she didn't recognize me at all. We started talking and remembered each other and became friends, I had made friends at school but it was nice to have a friend away from school. I started spending a lot of time at her apartment in Emeryville which is just across the bay from San Francisco but a lot cheaper. Paige works in San Francisco but her parents got her an apartment where it was cheaper. It was also pretty close to the UC Berkley campus and a lot nicer than the dorm room I had. Not to mention that my dorm room slept three and my other two roommates had been best friends growing up and I always felt left out, even if I hadn't we didn't get along they were obnoxious, immature and liked to party more than Alli. Paige didn't mind me sleeping over and our relationship quickly developed into more and so when Paige suggested I move in over the summer I readily agreed. We've been an official couple for three months now and I'm two months into my sophomore year pursuing a bachelor's degree in journalism.

Paige works as an assistant to the head of wardrobe at one of the biggest TV stations in San Francisco and we're quite happy together, but we've also been secret the last three months. Her parents know and her brother Dylan, the people she works with know and many of the people I go to school with but I was afraid of my mom finding out so we didn't tell anyone that might talk to her or know her. Telling my mom that I've not only discovered I'm bisexual but I'm in a relationship with a bisexual girl will not go well. Paige doesn't mind, she says we'll tell people when I'm ready and my parents have never come to visit. When Adam came to visit we had just moved in together and were not yet dating.

Last year during my creative writing class I discovered I had a talent for writing erotic novels. Preferring not to just write your standard trashy novel I write erotic mysteries. My first book got published a four months ago, under a pseudonym of course, but it was quite successful, even hitting the best seller list for a couple of weeks. So the publishers signed me to a contract. They know I'm in school so my deadlines are flexible. I haven't even told my mom, or anyone really, I published a book because of the smutty content.

"I will definitely wear a mask, and so will you," I tell her.

"That's fine I bet I can find some at work, right now I think you should take a break. You've been working rather hard and you look extremely sexy wearing nothing but that oversized sweater, bra and panties," Paige grins leaning up and attaching her lips to mine as she pulls the sweater up. Her lips attach to mine, both our lips parting and our tongues seeking each other out as our eyes close. I comb my fingers into her hair and grip her blouse, her hand works it's way under my sweater and she grasps my breast evoking a soft moan from me into the kiss. We might have continued had my stomach not growled and we break apart laughing. "I guess I should make us some dinner, when did you last eat?" Paige inquires getting off of me and then the sofa.

"I don't know lunch I guess, you know how I get when I'm writing but I should get back to my homework unless you need help with dinner?"

"No I got it, you concentrate on homework," she smiles.

I'm not done with homework by the time dinner is ready but I take a break to eat. Paige sits on the sofa with me for a while as I do my homework but she goes to shower and gets to bed fairly early since she has to be up early. I'm up until after one doing homework and writing, I kiss Paige when I slip into bed and she rolls over to face me. She's gone before I wake up the next morning, my first class isn't until ten so I can sleep in a little bit. The first thing I bought when I got the money from my book was a car. As soon as classes are out on Friday afternoon I return home, sitting on my favorite spot on the sofa and working on the book until Paige gets home.

"Okay stop working Doll I brought masks and our outfits for tomorrow night," she tells me holding up a couple of bags. I set the laptop down and sit up as she sets the bags down, the first thing she pulls out is a black mask with lace and feathers. "This one's yours," she informs me handing me the mask, "and this one's mine." She takes a red mask from the bag now, deep scarlet red and with velvet material and gems around the eyes.

"It's pretty now you said something about outfits?"

"Yep I like you in black so I got you a black one," Paige says pulling a black lace corset that zips down the front. It's the kind you step into with built-in panties but it's also all lace and leaves very little to the imagination.

"That's not an outfit that's lingerie," I disagree looking at the corset.

"Everyone wears lingerie, well most everyone. Look this is what I'm wearing," she comments pulling a red and black teddy from the bag, it's got lace straps and lace over the bra portion, laces up in back and is trimmed by lace, attaching by built in garters to sheer red stockings. "I got you stockings too and I got us shoes too, black for you and red for me," she says pulling the shoes from her bag. Both are five or six inch spiked heels, hers have a satin ribbon to tie them around her ankles while mine have very long leather laces to tie up around my calves.

"These aren't clothes, I can't go out wearing this, I'd be nervous to even wear it for you at home," I comment.

"Trust me everyone will be wearing lingerie, you won't stick out at all, what we're wearing isn't even very risky," Paige assures me.

"And how do you know all this?" I question as she sits on the sofa with me.

"Because I went last year with a co-worker, he had an extra ticket. It's a trip but it's fun. Come on let's try on our outfits," Paige grins.

She doesn't give me much of a choice as she pulls me up by the hand and we go into the bedroom. Paige takes off my top and unhooks my bra, pulls down sweats and panties together sucking on my clit briefly before standing up. I lean forward abducting her lips as I unbutton her blouse and pull it from her skirt. My fingers brush over her feather soft skin as I reach around and unhook her bra from the front. It falls open and I take it off her, when it falls to the floor I cup her breasts in my hands. Pulling out of the kiss and stepping back I unzip her skirt letting it fall to the floor, she steps out of it and kicks off her heels and I get her panties off. Paige sits me on the bed and begins rolling the stockings up my legs, then she helps me into the corset and the shoes before dressing herself.

"Well I do admit we look very sexy," I comment as I look at us in the mirror when we're in our outfits including the masks.

"Yes we do, we are some sexy bitches."

"Tell me we're at least wearing coats to the place?"

"Of course Doll, we should get out of these now or I might just rip yours off and we won't have anything to wear to the ball tomorrow," Paige says and I smile.

We undress again quite quickly and I push her to the bed, I kiss her quickly and then turn around mounting over her. She grabs my ass and our tongues dive into each other's slits at the same second. We both moan, our bodies trembling and quivering together, the faster my tongue moves the more her hips buck the more rapidly her tongue moves and the more my hips buck. It doesn't take long for us to get the other off. We've had days where we make love all day, slow and gentle and bringing one another to orgasm after orgasm. And then there are times we just a need a good orgasmic release, like just now.

I turn around taking her lips and tasting our mingling flavors, I lie next to her on the bed and she puts her arm over me kissing my nose. We lay in bed a few more minutes before getting up and putting robes on. We sit on the sofa drinking wine, eating dinner and watching TV until we go to bed. We spend the day on Saturday doing some cleaning and relaxing before changing and leaving for the ball.

It's a totally different world at this ball; everyone is in lingerie or barely wearing anything. People have no inhibitions here and I'm trying to let go of mine, Paige is just smiling and looking around, marveling at everyone and their costumes. I take a breath and decide to be here as my pseudonym alter ego, if I can write steamy mystery novels then I can get through tonight and have fun. It's pretty much one great big party for adults only. While 90% of the people here are either in lingerie or some state of undress or sexy costume there are few in actual costumes, it being the weekend before Halloween and all. There are also shows on various stages, a burlesque show, a BDSM show and things like that, as well as some little display areas where they have lingerie and sex toys on display. Paige and I wander for a while, sipping drinks and enjoying the atmosphere and then I see a face I know, in a black and white stripped corset with frills and lace.

"Fiona!" I exclaim just shocked to see her before I realize calling her name reveals that I'm here. She looks over at me and wrinkles her forehead, we did spend some time together in high school but we were never friends exactly. I haven't changed all that much since high school but I kept my hair pretty short and when Fiona knew me I had the big sort of Shirley Temple curls most of the time. Plus I'm wearing a mask and I have a girl's arm around my waist. "Do I…" Fiona starts and I lift mask so she can see me, "Holy shit Clare!"

"Hi never thought I'd run into you here, didn't you go to Italy?" I question as we embrace.

"Me? What about you? I would think this is the last place you'd ever be, well one of them. I heard you broke it off with Eli and dated Drew for a few months and now you seem to be with this sexy creature," Fiona says eyeing Paige with a smile.

"Yep all true, this is Paige and she is my girlfriend. What are you doing in san Francisco?" I question.

"Getting married, Imogen came to Italy last year and we re-connected. She proposed six months ago, Imi's here…somewhere we kind of got separated it happens easily. Wow I can't believe you're with a girl, Eli would shit twice and die if he saw you right now," Fiona remarks.

"Yeah probably, we started out as friends but it developed into more and we're both bisexual but no one knows. Are you guys going to be in town a few days?" I ask her.

"Yes for a couple of weeks," she nods.

"Can we get together, somewhere away from here? Maybe you guys can come to our apartment?"

Fiona says sure and I give her my address and we exchange phone numbers, she hugs us again and goes off to find Imogen. Paige and I continue to walk around and I tell her about Fiona and Imogen.

"I'm going to find a washroom and some food, meet me at the lingerie display in half an hour," Paige tells me.

She gives me a kiss and wanders off and now I'm wandering alone but at this point I've settled into the atmosphere. I wander a bit also hoping to find food but find someone else I know instead. Okay so I actually know him far less than I know Fiona but Owen Milligan is a hard person to forget.

"You I'm not so surprised to see here," I comment. He looks at me and cocks an eyebrow with no clue who I am. I admit with no shirt on and leather pants he looks pretty good. Instead of asking who I am Owen just reaches forwards and lifts my mask, it still takes him a second and then his mouth drops to the floor.

"Fuck me if it isn't Clare Edwards! What in the hell are you doing here?"

"Well I live in the area and thought it would be fun to see what the city does for Halloween," I reply which is only a half-truth.

I dated Drew for about six months in senior year, when we were headed to different universities he wanted to break up, he was worried that what happened with him and Bianca would happen to us. Adam was both happy and sad to see us part. I've only kept in touch with Drew via Adam, the younger Torres brother lives in Los Angeles and we get together every few months usually meeting halfway. Even Adam doesn't know I've discovered I'm bi and living with a girl. I do know that Owen has kept in touch with Drew a little though and Drew still lives in Toronto, where my mom is.

"Well you look damn good so where do you live now?" He questions.

"Emeryville and I go to UC Berkeley, what about you?"

"I live in San Mateo, I got drafted by the Sharks," he says.

"Hey that's awesome, you live close we should get together and catch up," I comment.

"Yeah cool," he smiles getting his phone out and we exchange numbers.

I leave Owen and find some food on the way to the lingerie display. Paige and I stay until after one but she works on Sundays so we decide to go home and get some sleep. I admit it was more fun than I thought and I was surprised to see people I knew, but glad they weren't people I knew very well. Paige works late Sundays so we can sleep in, she leaves at eleven and then I call Fiona, she tells me Imogen is still sleeping and not feeling too well but she'll come over. Since they're staying in the city it will take her a while to get here so I go down the street and grab some stuff for lunch. When I hear a knock on the door I open it and let Fiona in.

"Thanks for coming, I needed some advice and maybe just to talk with someone who's been there. Paige has been there too but her brother is gay so it wasn't really hard for her to tell her parents," I explain letting Fiona in.

"No problem, so you haven't told anyone?" Fiona asks sitting down.

"Paige's parents and her brother, some of my friends from school and her co-workers but none of them know my mom or new me in high school," I reply.

"Well Adam would be happy for you I'd think, Drew too. I never met your mom but I heard Eli talk about her a bit. I was scared of telling my family too, we were brought up in world of wealth and certain expectations. In the end my family was happy that I was happy don't you think your mom would be?"

"Maybe, eventually she doesn't generally take surprises well, as scared as I am to tell her Paige deserves to be more than a secret. I really care about her, I think I'm falling love and I want her to know my friends, and family but my parents reaction is what's stopping me. I don't think Jake with care and Glen probably won't either as long as I'm happy. My mom and dad though might just never speak to me again," I sigh.

"If you really want to stop hiding Paige you just have to bite the bullet and tell people. If your parents can't accept it then it's their problem, if they really love you then they'll have to," Fiona advises.

I nod in agreement and we begin eating, I tell her all about me and Paige and she tells me about her relationship with Imogen. Fiona stays for over two hours until Imogen calls and then they invite me and Paige to the wedding. I worry about imposing and being last minute guests but they say they want us there and Imogen's cousin and his wife cancelled so there's a place for us. When Fiona leaves I call Owen and ask to meet him for dinner in the city. I take public transit since I can meet Paige and ride home with her. I figure if I'm going to start telling people I know I'll start with someone I barely know and probably doesn't care.

"Thanks for coming I'm sort of using you as a test subject," I inform him after the waiter has seated us and taken our drink order.

"Sounds sort of kinky, test subject for what?"

"Well I somewhat recently discovered I was bi-sexual," I tell him just blurting it out.

"Sweet," he grins.

"I'm dating, live with and am falling in love with the same girl."

"Awesome," he replies.

"I also write erotic mystery novels, well one so far anyway. I wrote A Carnal Conundrum," I enlighten him.

"You wrote that? Seriously? Everyone on the team read that book it was really good. You're doing another one right?"

"Yeah working on it now," I smile as our drinks come.

While we eat I show Owen pictures of me and Paige and he remembers her from school a little. I tell him how we re-met and got together and that most everyone else thinks we're just roommates. He shows me pictures of the girl he's dating, tells me how he got drafted and how Tris is doing. After dinner he drops me off at the TV station where Paige works and we make plans for the four of us to have dinner this week.

"Hey Doll what are you doing here?" Paige asks with a smile when she sees me.

"I had dinner with a friend and thought I'd get a ride home with you," I tell her.

"Good timing I was just about to leave," she says gathering her stuff.

"I told Owen about us, I want to start telling people, he was happy for us. Telling him was easy, telling my parents won't be," I comment.

"We don't have to tell them yet," she responds as we go down to her car and start driving home.

"I want to," I assert.

She stops walking and kisses me, on the drive home I tell her about Fiona coming over and being invited to their wedding on Saturday. I also tell her about dinner with Owen. When we get home we relax in front of the TV for a bit before going to bed. Monday after classes I arrange to video chat with Adam, he'll be calling when Paige is home which is good. They have met but before we were dating or even living together, when I moved in I just said it would be nice to be living with a friend.

"Hey Clare doing anything for Halloween tomorrow?" He questions when his face appears on screen.

"No we kind of celebrated this weekend. Adam there's some things I need to tell you."

"Okay what's up?"

"Well first off Paige and I more than just roommates, we've been dating for three months now, I'm bisexual," I inform him and Paige over to me.

"Awesome I had a feeling there was more between you two," Adam grins, "you haven't told your mom yet have you?"

"No I'm afraid too but I am going to. You can tell Drew though, and your parents. I also want to tell you that I'm Madame Doyle," I inform him.

"I thought A Carnal Conundrum had your writing style."

The three of us talk a bit more before hanging up. Paige and I eat dinner and then I decide I'd better call my parents so I start with my dad. He's shocked but he doesn't judge and tells me as long as I'm happy that's all that matters. Now it's time to call Mom and I go into the bedroom to do it.

"Hi Clare," Glen answers the house phone.

"Hi Glen, can you put the phone on speaker I need to talk to you both," I say.

"Hi Honey you're on speaker," Mom tells me.

"Um you know my roommate Paige?"

"Yes a very nice girl," Mom says.

"Yes she is, she's also my girlfriend I'm bisexual."

"Excuse me?" Mom demands.

"You heard me Mom I'm bi and Paige is my girlfriend I'm falling in love with her."

"You're what? When did you decide this?" Mom exclaims but I can't tell if she's angry or shocked or both or something else.

"I didn't decide anything Mom it just happened and I'm happy, really happy."

"Well I'm…this is just…I never thought…" Mom stumbles.

"Neither did I Mom and I've been attracted to another girl but I am falling in love with Paige. She makes me happy but I didn't decide anything it was like an epiphany, an awakening and I really am happy," I assert.

"We're very shocked Clare but as long as you're happy we're happy for you," Glen tells me when Mom reminds silent.

"Thanks Glen."

"Yes Honey all I want for my kids is for them to be happy, however and with whomever makes them happy," Mom says and I let out a sigh of relief.

Now that Mom knows and isn't yelling I tell her about the book, she's quite excited about it actually. To my surprise she even read it but she's thrilled that her daughter is a published writer. Over the next few days I tell Jake, Darcy, Alli, Jenna and Paige tells Hazel, Ashley, Alex, Marco, Ellie, Spinner and Emma. Of course they all knew she was bi and only a few of them remember me so it's not as much of a shock as it is to my friends. Everyone, shocked or not by the news, is happy for us. Saturday arrives and it's time for Fiona and Imogen's wedding at Bentley Reserve, an opulent hall with 1920's beauty and a lot of history. Paige wears a soft pink dress and white blazer and white heels. I wear a light blue dress with black heels. We arrive at the hall and are shown to our seats. I see Declan and the Coyne parents, Imogen's dad and Eli, well this should be interesting.

The ceremony is lovely and I smile holding onto Paige's hand while we watch Fiona and Imogen affirm their love. The reception is in the same room so while we're congratulating the couple event workers clear out the chairs; bring in food and a DJ booth. The happy couple have their first dance together as a married couple and then other people start dancing while some of us find our tables. I see Declan and we greet each other, I introduce Paige as my girlfriend and Declan just smiles. Paige and I find our table and I see Eli watching me, I bite my lip and Paige looks at me squeezing my hand. She knows all about Eli I told her everything. Eli walks over with his head partially down, he looks better than I remember but I haven't seen him since learning he cheated in senior year.

"May I have this dance?" Eli requests.

"Go on I'll get us some food," Paige says so I follow Eli to the dance floor. Dancing with him brings back a lot of memories.

"I was surprised to see you here," Eli comments.

"Yeah I ran into Fiona at the Exotic Erotic Ball."

"You went? You have changed so much in the last two years I feel like I don't know you at all. And Paige she's really you're girlfriend?"

"Yes she is and I'm falling in love with her, I'm really happy."

"Good then I'm happy for you, it's shocking but I'm happy for you," Eli smiles.

"Thanks Eli," I grin kissing his cheek as the song ends.

He walks me back to the table and I sit down, Paige and I eat then dance for a few songs. I dance once with Declan and even once with Fiona.

"Okay time to throw the bouquet single girls get over here," Fiona calls and Paige pulls my hand over to the group of gathering girls.

Fiona turns around tossing the bouquet I reach up, my hand and someone else's hand land on it at the same time. I look over to see whose hand it is and smile when I see it's Paige's hand!