AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is a short story that I wrote for Skitch's birthday back in June. I'm not really Anti-Sarah, but Skitch is, so I figured that she would enjoy this little bit. :)

***

Skitch awoke from a fitful sleep to a dark, cold, silent bunkroom. The other newsies surrounding her were sleeping soundly.

"Sheez, if there was a thunderstorm or somethin' they'd never wake up," she muttered to herself, turning her pillow over and smacking it several times before settling back down.

Just as she was drifting off, though, the bunk bed started to shake. "Jack, knock it off!" she muttered (more to herself than the boy on the top bunk). She propped up on one elbow, made a fist with her opposite hand, raised it upward, and brought it down hard on Jack's shoulder. After a moment and several mutterings of, "Whassa matta witchu?", Jack's tossing and turning ceased.

Skitch smiled to herself and settled down again. Before she closed her eyes again, she dared to cast a glance at Dutchy, who slept on the top bunk of the bed beside her. Smiling again, she rolled over lazily and closed her eyes, drifting off to sleep.

***

"Sell the papes! Carry the banner!"

Skitch was awakened quite rudely when Kloppman slapped her bare feet which had been sticking out from under her blanket. Groggily, she pulled them back in and tried her best to go back to sleep, but to no avail. Kloppman's yelling was enough to wake the dead.

"You kids, you sleep your lives away! What are you ever gonna be good for if you're sleepin'? You sleep the whole day away you won't get nothin' done! Sell the papers! The ink is wet! Higgins, put that cigar out or I'll put it somewhere for ya!"

The newsies dragged themselves out of bed and headed toward their respective washrooms like zombies. Skitch followed the other girls to the girls' washroom - the girls had their own bunkroom as well, but as the ceiling had fallen through a few days ago they had been moved to the boys' room until the damage could be repaired.

"'Mornin', Skitch," Monkey yawned as she searched for her toothbrush.

"Yeah, yeah," Skitch muttered, bumping into Kora on her way to the sinks.

"'Scuse me, Skitch," Kora offered, even though it technically hadn't been her fault.

Skitch responded with an identical, "Yeah, yeah," as she turned on the sink and splashed her face. Monkey and Kora just looked at each other and shrugged.

Soon the girls were downstairs and heading outside toward the circulation office. They stopped at the nuns' cart for breakfast and then went on their ways.

As they neared the office, Skitch noticed someone nauseatingly familiar standing beside the gate. She poked Monkey. "Is that who I think it is?"

The color drained from Monkey's face. Kora stepped up. "What's going on? The two of you look like you've just seen Snyder incarnate."

"Worse," Skitch answered, pointing.

Kora's mouth dropped open. At about that time Carrie and Jel joined the three, and, without being told, saw the worst as well.

"Sarah Jacobs," Skitch muttered queasily.

"Don't tell me she's - "

"Hi, girls!! I'm going to be a newsy now, with my Jacky Boy!"

Sarah bounced up to the five newsies with a wide grin on her face. "Isn't it great? We can all be friends now! And maybe, at the end of the week, we can have a spend the night party and give each other makeovers!!! You can borrow my dresses so you won't have to wear those really masculine clothes and those *awful* hats - "

"Does anybody have a sledgehammer on hand?" Skitch asked through gritted teeth. The other four girls weren't looking well, either.

"Sledgehammer? How horribly manly," Sarah said, wrinkling her nose and putting a hand to her chest. "What are they used for, anyway? Hammering sledges?"

Obviously, she thought that this was funny, because she giggled like a maniac.

"There's no such *thing* as a sledge," Jel said impatiently.

"How do *you* know?" Sarah asked mockingly. "*You* don't have an education." She grinned smugly.

"Hey, what happened to the doily job, Sar?" Monkey asked quickly in an attempt to prevent confrontation.

"Oh - I um, I quit. Because I wanted to be a newsy with my Jacky Boy!" She tried to grin convincingly.

"Yeah, right. You probably got fired 'cause you made so many of 'em the manager went outta business," Carrie said.

"Either that or she smothered someone to death with 'em," Skitch muttered. The other girls tried to suppress snorts of laughter.

Before Sarah could retort, she had spotted Jack and was running toward him like he was free meat on the Lower East Side. "Jacky! Jacky! Can you teach me how to sell, Jacky???"

Poor Jack was looking quite smothered as he replied, "S-Sure, Sarah, gimme just one minute. Stay here with Mush."

Jack began to walk toward Skitch. "Skitch, I need to ask a favor."

"Oh yeah? Want me to babysit?" she asked dryly.

"Naw, Les is with Blink," he answered.

She rolled her eyes.

"Here's what I need you to do," Jack began in a hushed tone, leading her away from the other girls. "I need you to help me get rid of Sarah."

"Ugh, no! There's no way I'm *ever* going to kiss *you* - "

"No, no, that's not what I mean!" Jack corrected hastily. "I really want to get *rid* of her. She's driving me up the wall!"

"So whaddoyou want me to do?" Skitch asked, keenly interested now that it meant that she didn't have to have anything to do with Jack romantically.

"Isn't it obvious?" he asked with a gleam in his eye.

"N - wait. You're asking me to *kill* her?!"

"Shh, shh, don't say kill, even the walls have ears! I prefer to think of it as, uh, termination," Jack answered.

"What's in it for me?" Skitch asked, looking over Jack's shoulder toward Dutchy.

Jack shrugged. "Well, ah, there is this certain snow-blonde who's been tryin' to win your affections ever since you came to the house..."

Skitch tried not to grin too widely. "You got yourself a hitman - uh, hitwoman, um, yeah. I would have done it anyway, just for the heck of getting rid of the leech, but it's interesting to know what's on your end of the bargain."

"Thank you!" Jack said happily. "...How are you gonna do it?"

"I think I might torture her for a while..." Skitch answered thoughtfully. "I dunno, I'll have to think about it."

Nodding, Jack turned and headed back toward the bubbling Sarah, acting once again like he had no problem with her.

Skitch returned to her four friends, who had, by that time, gotten their papes. Carrie handed a stack of papers to Skitch. "Here, I went ahead and got yours."

"Thanks," Skitch answered, taking the stack.

"So, what'd Jack want with ya, Ski?" Kora asked.

"Oh, he wanted me to, um, terminate a little problem of his..." she answered slowly.

Jel's eyes widened. "No! You're gonna ki - "

"Not kill, Jel, just...terminate," Skitch answered evilly.

Monkey's hand flew to her mouth. "You're not supposed to mur - terminate people, Skitch!"

She looked at Monkey. "Monk. It's *Sarah*."

Kora laughed evilly. "Can I help?"

"You can help torture," Skitch answered, grinning.

"I like to torture people..." Jel said thoughtfully.

Carrie, like Monkey, looked shocked. "Skitch, you're talking about cold-blooded murder here!"

"Shhh, termination, Carrie!" Skitch corrected.

"I don't care what it is," she answered. "You could be thrown in jail!"

"Do you think her parents are really gonna care that much?" Skitch asked. "They'll probably thank me for the favor."

"Y'know, her parents have hired several guys to terminate her in the past, Ski, but it hasn't worked so far," Kora grinned. "Maybe Jack knows it's gotta be a girl to do the job. Get her distracted."

"There ain't no way I'm playin' barbies with that little priss!" Skitch answered, shuddering.

"Well, then, just knock her out and drag her to Brooklyn. Spot'll be glad to provide torture facilities," Kora said.

"Good idea," Skitch answered. "Monkey, you an' Carrie are gonna be our messengers, all right? Me, Kora, and Jel are gonna do all the dirty work. Now, what we need you two to do is go over to Brooklyn and talk to Spot about our little job. You two stay over in Brooklyn and we'll meet you over there with the victim. That clear?"

"Crystal," Monkey answered, slightly pale.

"Spot...Conlon..." Carrie whispered to herself, grinning widely. "*I* get to talk to...Spot...Conlon..."

"All right, that's enough, you two, get goin'," Skitch said abruptly, giving the two a little shove in the direction of the Brooklyn Bridge.

She turned back to Kora and Jel. "Let's go get our...torture devices, shall we?"

"Spot's got enough in Brooklyn, though, doesn't he?" Kora asked.

Skitch thought for a moment. "Yeah, he does. Let's just go get her off Jack's hands."

"Y'know, we probably don't wanna knock her out, because that'll look too fishy - us dragging her over the bridge? Why don't we just convince her that we're going to a sleepover in Brooklyn and we want her to come along?" Jel said.

"Good idea," Skitch answered. "Let's go."

The three began to walk in the direction that Jack had headed in. The streets were beginning to crowd, and they had to look hard until they finally spotted Sarah. They made their way over to her and Jack.

"Hey!" Skitch called, shoving through the crowd to get to them.

"Hi!!!" Sarah bubbled, waving. "Jack was just showing me how to stand in front of the moving carriages if I really want to sell a lot of papers!!"

Skitch elbowed Jack hard. "Hey, what about the deal?" she hissed through gritted teeth.

Jack just shrugged. "Couldn't resist."

"So, um, Sarah," Kora began, "you up for a sleepover in Brooklyn tonight? They're doing makeovers all night."

"Yeah," Jel added, "and I heard something about barbie dolls."

"Really?!" Sarah gushed.

"Really," Skitch answered, nodding convincingly.

"Oooh, Jacky, do you mind if I go?!?!" Sarah asked excitedly.

"Naw, go right ahead, Princess," Jack answered with a fake sap in his voice.

Sarah threw her arms around his neck and kissed him. When she pulled away and turned toward the girls, Jack made a face. Skitch had a hard time keeping from laughing.

"Let's go!!" Sarah bubbled, linking arms with Skitch and Kora. Jel tagged along behind, looking back at Jack. He was grinning from ear to ear like he was the king of New York, ready to get rid of Sarah once and for all.

"Goodbye, my lovey-dovey baby!!!" she squealed as Skitch and Kora dragged her off.

"And good riddance," Jack muttered through gritted teeth, smiling widely and waving goodbye.

***

"So, let me get this straight," Spot began, pacing back and forth in front of a nervous Monkey and a drooling Carrie. "Skitch, Kora, and Jel are bringing Sarah here to kill her?"

"Well, yeah," Monkey answered slowly, looking at the ground. "They made us the messengers since we didn't want any part of it...it looks like we're still involved, though."

"Well," Spot began, "if you promise you won't leak anything that goes on here tonight, you two never came here to talk to me."

"Really?" Monkey asked hopefully. "Thank you!"

"Any time," Spot grinned. "Now, when are they coming?"

"They should be here soon," Carrie answered, breaking from her trance.

He nodded, stroking his chin with his thumb. "Well, then, if you two don't wanna stay for the fun, I think we're finished here."

The three stood. Spot shook hands with Monkey and Carrie. "I'll see you two later. Give Jack a holler for me, wouldja?"

"Sure thing, Spot," Monkey answered as she and Carrie headed back toward the bridge.

***

Finally, Skitch, Kora, and Jel reached Brooklyn with a very excited Sarah in tow. "All right, Sarah," Skitch began as they neared the old warehouse that doubled as the lodging house, "here's the sleepover! It's gonna be great."

"YAY!!!" Sarah squealed, jumping up and down. Kora elbowed her hard.

"OWW! What was that for?!"

"Duh," Kora answered, "you don't want to scare the barbies away."

"Ooh, yeah!" Sarah said. "Can't scare the barbies!"

Rolling her eyes, Skitch pounded on the door. It opened a crack and out stuck Spot Conlon's head. "Pass?"

"Shaddup, Spot, it's us," Jel spat.

Spot grinned. "I know. C'mon in. Welcome Sarah."

As they entered the room, Sarah's mouth fell open. "You tricked me! This is a boys' sleepover! My name is tarnished!"

She couldn't get away, though. Skitch and Spot grabbed her by the arms and held her fast, dragging her into a back room. They closed the door behind them, locking it, and tied Sarah into a chair.

"What is this?!!?!!" she squealed.

"Hmm, now, let's see...which torture device do you want first, ladies?" Spot asked. "The cattle prod? The toe-twisters? The finger vice?"

"I get it!" Sarah laughed. "You guys are gonna tickle me!"

"Naw, you ain't gonna be laughin'," Spot answered matter-of-factly.

Sarah tilted her head to the side and made puppy dog eyes. "Really?"

"Really really," Skitch answered, grinning evilly as he handed the cattle prod to Skitch, the toe-twisters to Kora, and the finger vice to Jel.

Skitch did the honors by shocking Sarah with the cattle prod. But, to her utter horror, Sarah *laughed*. "Do it again!" she squealed.

Kora stepped forward with the toe-twisters and succeeded in breaking all ten of Sarah's toes. However, Sarah kept laughing.

After Jel had squeezed all of Sarah's fingers in the vice, and even when both of her hands were reduced to nothing but bloody nubs, Sarah was still laughing.

"You guys don't know?" she asked, tears of laughter running down her face.

"Know what?" Skitch asked.

"That I have no feelings of pain?" Sarah asked, still laughing. "The more painful something is, the more it tickles!"

Spot stomped his foot. "Aww, c'mon, let's just toss her over the bridge!"

Kora, Jel, and Skitch grinned at each other.

"I'm up for it," Skitch answered with an evil gleam in her eye.

And the four picked up the chair and Sarah and hauled it toward the docks.

THE END