Author's Note: Everclear invaded my brain recently and my insane thoughts travelled towards Jackson and Lisa.
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters mentioned in this story...in case you were wondering.
Here is the money that I owe you
Yeah so you can pay the bills
I will give you more
When I get paid again
I hate those people who love to tell you
Money is the root of all that kills
They have never been poor
They have never had the joy of
a welfare Christmas
She stared at the envelope sitting on her kitchen counter contemplating what he had once told her about his childhood. He said he'd never let his son go though the same trials and tribulation that he had. He said he'd always be there for her, even if she didn't want him around. He was not just going to walk out on them, as much as she wanted him to sometimes. So every other Friday, after work and after picking Aidan up from day care, she'd come home to an envelope of cash and a sea breeze sitting on her kitchen counter. She knew he was watching so she made a point of violently pouring the drink down the drain, except for those few occasions where she was glad to have an alcoholic beverage to soothe her.
(yeah) I know we will never look back (yeah)
You say you wake up crying
Yes and you don't know why
You get up and you go lay down inside
My baby's room
She'd wake up late at night her face streaked with tears and her body convulsing with painful sobs. On several occasions she'd grouped the opposite side of the bed searching for his warmth only to be met with cool bed sheets and an empty pillow. On those nights she'd slip into Aidan's room and lie beside his crib just watching him sleep until her mind was content enough to let her body rest.
Yeah I guess I'm doing okay
I moved in with the strangest guy
Can you believe he actually
Thinks that I am really alive?
He'd had picked up the bad habit of talking to her about work- she had no desire to hear about his latest target or who he was pretending to be. The last time she'd seen him he had moved into a loft apartment with his latest victim; playing the role of best friend to the arrogant son of a Middle Eastern aristocrat who was slated for demise in the next month.
I will buy you a garden
Where your flowers can bloom
I will buy you a new car
Perfect shiny and new
I will buy you that big house
Way up in the west hills
I will buy you a new life
(Yes I will)
He promised that she'd never have to worry about a thing; he'd take care of it all. He offered her a new life but it became too much. The traveling, the late nights, his job: it all wore her down until she was, yet again, a thin shell of herself just going through the motions. When she'd found out she was pregnant part of her didn't want him to find out. She knew that he could never really settle down and be the family man she'd fantasized about late at night when she couldn't sleep- inside, he'd always be the manager she'd met on the plane. But she could at least rely on him for financial support. She'd told him two weeks into the pregnancy and he insisted on being there for her. He bought a nice house for them in upstate New York and, when she demanded that she'd needed a job, he set her up as a receptionist for a local doctor who happened to be on the company's pay roll. He stayed with her until Aidan was born but three months later he'd gone back to work jet setting across the country setting people up and bringing them down.
Yes, I know all about that other guy
The handsome man with athletic thighs
I know about all the times before
with that obsessive little rich boy
They might make you think you're happy
Yeah maybe for a minute or two
They can't make you laugh
No they can't make you feel
The way that I do
Time went by and Aidan grew- his features painfully reminiscent of his father's. He came by less frequently and when he was there he was more distant then he'd ever been. He spent time with his son- feeding him, playing with him, changing him, once they'd fallen asleep together watching Barney in the living room: she'd taken a picture and kept it in Aidan's room on top of the dresser. But he always seemed cold towards her, focusing more time and energy on his work then her. When Aidan was nine months old she'd ventured into the dating world. She'd gone on a few dates with a local business man and then had a brief affaire with a young college graduate who'd obsessed over her as if she were a Goddess. But, when they left her- and they always did because she'd push them away before they got too close- she'd go back to wishing he was back. Wishing that things had been different: if he didn't have that stupid job, if she didn't get pregnant…
I will buy you a garden
Where your flowers can bloom
I will buy you a new car
Perfect shiny and new
I will buy you that big house
Way up in the west hills
I will buy you a new life
Yeah I will buy you a new life
(oh... yeah)
ooo I know we can never look back
(yeah)
(oh)
Will you please let me stay the night
Will you please let me stay the night
No one will ever know
One particularly stormy night, three weeks before Aidan's second birthday, he showed up at her door. The doorbell had woken Aidan up and she'd open the door while trying to soothe the fitful child. She gasped when she saw him, succeeding in agitating Aidan more. He was soaked to the bone and looked half dead and she asked no questions as he stumbled over her threshold and went straight to the bathroom. Aidan had calmed down and was sleeping in the bed with her when he'd finished in the bathroom. He watched from the doorway as his child and wife relaxed peacefully in the home he'd created for them and his heart broke knowing that he hadn't been with them in the longest time. But now it was all done and over. His jobs were finished and his debts were paid, and he'd stashed enough money away over the years for him and his family to live happily for quite some time- that was if she'd have him. She looked up from their child and met his gaze with questioning weary eyes.
"What do you want?" She whispered to him.
"This," he replied gesturing around the room with his outstretched arms. "If it's not too late…" he added quietly keeping his blue eyes trained on her hazel.
"I can't do this anymore Jackson," she wiped a tear from her eye, "I can't have you come and go as you please. Walking around here like a ghost. I just can't do that anymore. If you want to be here I need a commitment. Do you know how much it hurts to not know where you are or if you're coming back?" Her heart was breaking with every word that slipped past her lips. She was risking it all- but that was it, she either wanted it all or nothing at all. She waited for his response as silent tears slipped down her cheeks.
He walked further into the room stopping beside the bed. He kneeled down in front of her and took her face in his hands and kissed her passionately.
I will buy you a garden
Where your flowers can bloom
I will buy you a new car
Perfect shiny and new
I will buy you that big house
Way up in the west hills
I will buy you a new life
"Leese, I am so sorry," he whispered against her lips. "I'm back now, for good. No more traveling, no more jobs, nothing- just you and me and Aidan." He kissed her again.
Part of her was angry that she'd just accepted him back into their lives, but she knew she needed him more then she was willing to admit- there was no one else like him and only he could make her happy. He slipped under the covers next to their sleeping toddler and smiled. He'd have to make his absence up to her, and he would. He would spend the rest of his life doting on her as if she were the only woman in the world and he was the lucky man that got her. And then he realized he was lucky. He'd gone from heartless professional killer to love-filled professional father and husband in a matter of seconds. His world now officially revolved around his family, and he would make sure that they had all their hearts desired.
I will buy you a garden
Where your flowers can bloom
I will buy you a new car
Perfect shiny and new
I will buy you that big house
Way up in the west hills
I will buy you a new life
I will buy you a new life
The End