She could feel the hands of the nurses and doctors grabbing her.
The restraints they were forcing her into.
Her head was a blazing pit filled with burning rage.
She would kill that woman, the one they called Dr. Banfield.
That woman was the one who forced her into these ridiculous harnesses.
That woman was the reason they gave her these painful shots, the reason she was being held down.
Her head was still spinning.
She remembered when she had pushed her sister off of that wall.
How good it had felt.
How nice to see her sister, her nemesis, the one who their mother had always loved more, lying crumpled on the ground with blood pulsing out of her head.
Then again, when she had turned down the oxygen flow.
And when she threw the match onto her sheets when she couldn't even move.
She had whispered in her ear "Have fun."
But now, she was the one trapped on the gurney with a harness strapped around her body while her sister was probably being hugged by their mother.
How she envied her for that.
Their mother had always loved her sister more.
She never even looked at Claire unless she was punishing her for "disrupting Julie's routine."
At school her sister was the popular one, the one in 7th grade who was the goddess of all their classmates.
The one who could flip three times in a row and still land on her feet.
She, on the other hand, was the quiet, shy 6th grade girl who was smarter than most of the teachers and always hung out by herself.
She heard that woman calling for the psych ward.
She screamed for her mother to help her.
She yelled at the doctors and nurses, screeching "Get off me!"
But no one listened.
No one ever did.
She once had had one friend.
That friends name had been Kathleen.
But last spring, Kathleen had been hit and killed by a car.
The pain of losing her had probably been far worse than anything Julie was feeling.
She now felt another needle being inserted into her exposed arm.
She felt the medicine plunge into her system.
She struggled and yelled at the woman who was responsible for all her pain, "I will kill you! I'm gonna cut you up into little pieces!"
And she meant it.
She would take revenge.
Even if it was the last thing she did, she would get that woman.
It would only be a matter of time before she convinced the doctors that she was a normal 12-year-old girl.
She'd convinced her teachers, she'd convinced her mom,
And she'd even convinced herself.