Music expresses that which cannot be said and on which it is impossible to be silent.
-Victor Hugo
Fingers flexing over the keys, she paused a moment to take in the silence before the void was no more, and music filled the hall. Her fingers swept across the keys, as nothing is as satisfying as the sound of music. The sweet melody that was Beethoven sedated her to her core, only she wasn't deaf to its euphonious intonation as she closed her eyes. In that moment, she pitied the man, the poor soul of such breath-taking compositions… and he never had the opportunity to hear them. It would be a curse of curses to be deaf, she often thought. She would rather be blind, mute, even sacrifice her arms and hands themselves, to surrender them, to never touch an instrument again, so long as she could only hear the beauty of another. But she was not deaf, nor was she blind or mute, and all of her limbs were intact. A new sound came from the background, her eyes fluttering open as the music abruptly ceased.
"… Kotone. We have visitors," Her mother, Kokoro, whispered in her ear, resting her hand momentarily upon her daughter's shoulder.
Kotone brought her legs up onto the bench, holding her ankles.
"I need to be present?" She asked, her voice almost as melodic as the piece she had just finished playing.
"No," Kokoro smiled sadly,
"But as beautiful as your music is, your father has requested total silence while he meets with the rest of the investigation team in the living room."
Kotone stiffened, nervously tucking ebony locks behind her ear.
"But, mother… I- I thought they were meeting at that hotel in- ?"
Her mother shook her head slowly, pulling the strap to her duffle bag over head.
"I'm sorry. I know how you don't like your father being involved with the Kira case- or being a policeman altogether, for that matter- but he is, and they are, so you're going to have to bear with it for the next few weeks, dear."
"Weeks?!" She whined, her normally even tone soaring to sopranos.
"Perhaps months. Well, at least, until they can find a new place to meet. Since the hotel they were using for their meetings in being renovated, someplace had to be offered up, and, your father was the first to step up to the plate. Oh, and, don't be shy- your father is busy, I'm off to the university, so that leaves you to offer refreshments to the nice investigators. They're risking their lives to catch that Kira, so the least you could do is offer them some tea."
Her mother bid her goodbye as she quietly went out the front door, and Kotone's body seemed to have a mind of its own, as she often thought it did, and her legs found their way to her chest and her arms coiled around them as she began to rock back and forth on the bench on her heels.
"Tea…" She murmured, reminding herself as she unwound from her distressed ball.
She didn't like those men in her house, let alone have to speak to them, if only for a moment. What was more, she was banned from her beloved instruments for weeks or months now, as she was unsure of how long these meetings would take place. Her father was gone for nearly ten hours daily to attend these get-togethers, and now with this L on the team, it was sure to be substantially longer. Standing up, she gathered her nerve and walked into the front room.
"… Father mentioned that a new man had joined this task force… The man that challenged Kira on a broadcast the day before yesterday, L… Is that the reason for the sudden switch of location? Is it because this L is afraid that Kira might find him at the station?"
Kotone pushed open the door, where seven men stood, including her father, though One seemed to stand out among the iron-pressed suits. He alone wore a long-sleeved white shirt and casual jeans, and not even socks or shoes. He scratched his ankle with his toes, his hands shuffling in his pockets.
"I am L," He stated bluntly.
Kotone's eye's flitted to her father, seeing the reaction she knew he'd have; A look of disapproval. While the other members eyed L with obvious curiosity, Ulrich scowled at the man and his, "lack of posture and formality." The same way he always looked at her because she refused to dress in ballroom dresses and formal attire. L began scratching his head, when his insane eyes met her own blue ones. Kotone felt a shiver run down her spine for the brief moment, then his gaze fell upon the others.
Chief Yagami regained his composure, unveiling his police ID.
"I am Yagami, of the NPA."
"Uhh… Matsuda."
"I'm Aizawa."
"Mogi."
"Ukita."
"Ulrich Ide."
"I'm very sorry we're late," Yagami began.
L's hand left his hair, and he pointed his index finger, in the shape of a gun, at the group.
"Currently, the six of us are-"
"Bang," L interrupted.
The entire group flinched as Kotone brought a curious index finger to her lips.
Her father's disapproving scowl deepened.
"What the hell was that?" He demanded.
A sound that resembled a soft groan erupted from L's throat.
"If I were Kira, you'd all be dead, except for the lady in the back. Kira needs both a face and a name in order to commit murder. But I'm sure you've already figured that much out, haven't you?"
Kotone shuddered as her father's scowl changed its target, seven pairs of eyes falling on her. She rose her hands in her defense, like a paper umbrella in a hurricane.
"I- I just wanted to ask if anyone wanted tea, I didn't mean to- "
"Please do not give out your names so carelessly," L interjected, attention being turned back to him.
All except for her father's, of course. If looks could kill, she just might be six feet under. Her father desperately hated it when she intruded in his cases.
"Instead," L continued, his tone bored and apathetic as he turned to sit in an armchair in the far corner.
"Let's value our lives. Now, enough small talk. Come this way."
"Kotone," Ulrich reprimanded.
"Go to your room and compose something. Take your leave, and stay out of our way during these meetings."
"Y-yes, fath-"
"No, please don't," L added thoughtfully.
"I'd prefer if she'd stay here today, at all the meetings if possible."
"What?" Ulrich demanded, infuriated.
"My daughter is by no means any part of this investigation, L. I intend to keep it this way."
"I have no intention of making her part of this investigation; I only wish she be present here. I'd much rather have her here where I can keep an eye on her than if she were to be a peeping tom outside the door. Now, if you would,"
He waved a hand at the coffee table beside him.
"…please turn off your cell phones, handhelds, and any other communication devices and leave them on the table right there."
L's gaze met Kotone's exasperated one, as if to imply that she, too, were subject to the restraint.
"I try to avoid them… and I become a part of them…"
She stepped out of the doorway, removing her cell phone from her back pocket, switching it off before lying it down on the coffee table.
"I hate tea…"
"I realize he's been cautious from the very beginning," Matsuda mused aloud,
"But I still don't think he trusts us."
"No, I find it distracting. I can't stand it when people's cell phones are ringing while I'm trying to talk."
L climbed into the armchair, propping his feet in the seat, his hands resting on his knees.
"Let me start by saying that nobody takes notes about anything that's said at these meetings. All information will be committed to memory. Make yourselves comfortable- oh, Mr. Ide?"
"Yes?" Ulrich replied, slightly irate that a visitor had taken the initiative to allow others to make themselves comfortable in his own home.
"Thank you for letting us use your home as a means of meeting- aside from headquarters, anyway, which, your daughter will not be attending. Anything remotely confidential will be shared there, not in front of her… for reasons that you can completely understand, I am sure."
Ulrich nodded, the group filing into the living main room, sitting in various areas, L watching everyone carefully. It was only when they were all seated that he spoke.
"Kotone, was it? I think I will take you up on that offer of yours now. Although, I'm not much of a tea person myself, so coffee, please, if you wouldn't mind?"
"Not at all," She responded, rising once again to her feet.
But when an aged man walked into the room carrying a kettle, she sat back down, deeming herself unnecessary. He poured a cup of coffee for L, pretending to be oblivious to how meticulously he was being watched. She observed how delicately L handled the cup, and how he gingerly added countless sugar cubes to his drink, as if afraid to get his hands dirty.
"Excuse me, L?" Matsuda began, awkwardly breaking the silence.
"Oh, from now on I'll have to ask that you stop calling me L. It's "Ryuzaki" now, just to be safe," The newly declared Ryuzaki announced.
"Umm… Okay, Ryuzaki… So, we know that he needs a name and a face to kill, couldn't we just keep from posting criminal's names on the news?"
He stirred his coffee, before replying,
"If we do that, we'd only be putting the general public at risk."
"Why?" Matsuda persisted.
Ryuzaki looked up from his coffee, ceasing his stirring, and made eye contact with Kotone.
"Kira is childish, and hates to lose," Was his simplistic reply.
"Just what do you mean?" Sochiro inquired.
"Well," He started, returning to his drink,
"I'm also childish and I hate to lose. That's how I know."
"Could you try being a little more specific?" Ulrich droned.
"The broadcast," Kotone mused aloud before she could stop herself.
Ryuzaki, however, wasn't angry. Instead, he seemed slightly pleased she had spoken.
"Yes. I tried provoking him via the broadcast, when we thought that Kira would only go after criminals. As we all witnessed, he didn't hesitate to kill Lind L. Tailor."
"Then, as soon as you said that Kira was in the Kanto region, another string of victims from Japan were murdered, as if he were taunting you," Kotone mused again.
"He's met all of my challenges head on, and he's never missed an opportunity to return the favor," He continued.
"Now, what do you think would happen if we tried to use media restrictions to hide criminals from someone like that?"
Matsuda looked sheepish.
"I guess…"
"'If you choose to withhold the names of your worst criminals, I'll kill petty criminals, or the innocent. I'm holding the whole world hostage, so who's it going to be? I'm not the evil one here, but all of you who oppose me by hiding criminals, you are truly evil.' That's exactly how Kira thinks."
His gaze turned to Kotone, who hadn't spoken a word since the broadcast remark. He rubbed his feet together as he gazed curiously at her, analyzing her.
"…And what do you think of this?"
Kotone pursed her lips. There was a reason she didn't like the federal government, and this Ryuzaki wasn't accommodating this dislike.
"Of course you're allowed to say whatever is on your mind," Ryuzaki assured her, almost like reading her thoughts, jumping the gun before Ulrich had a chance to react. He brought his thumb to his mouth.
"Just because you're not part of this case, doesn't mean that you're exempt from these meetings… If that made any sense at all to you."
Figuring that was the best way to get this man to leave her alone, she graced him with the sound of her voice.
"Well, Kira obviously pays close attention to the media. I think that we should draw his attention with another broadcast."
Ryuzaki's eyes widened, a dim spark behind them, as if coming to some personal conclusion.
"I agree. Let's do something like this…"
He raised his head, staring at the ceiling.
" 'Death of FBI agents infuriates the US. Latest killings anger the International Policing Committee. Nations agree to send fifteen hundred investigators to Japan'. "
His head returned to eye level.
"For Kira, this will be way more than what he faced with the FBI. He'll see everyone as a potential threat. Psychologically, he'll start to feel cornered, and this will force him to take drastic action."
Everyone in the room seemed to exhale all at once, Kotone silently impressed with Ryuzaki's intellect. Matsuda and Aizawa began happily talking about such, Ryuzaki seeming annoyed.
"Well, before we celebrate, let me tell you about the rest of my thoughts on the Kira case."
Matsuda nodded, listening intently.
"Kira works alone. He had access to all our classified information. We know that he needs a name and face to kill, and that to some extent, can control a person's time of death, and their actions before dying. Please keep this in mind… and listen carefully to what I have to say next."
Ryuzaki pulled a black marker from his pocket, removing the cap and writing on the table. Ulrich's temple bulged, and Kotone made a mental note that this man may be a genius, but he was definitely no social butterfly and an enemy of common courtesy. Not the kind of men her father particularly liked.
"On December fourteenth, twelve FBI investigators enter Japan. Here we are, on December nineteenth, using prison inmates, Kira conducts experiments manipulating his victims' actions before they die. In other words, in this window of only five days, Kira obviously sensed the presence of FBI agents and felt threatened."
He traced a bold black line back and forth, back and forth several times over the arrows between the days.
"Because he didn't know any of their names or faces, he was at a disadvantage. He needed to know to what extent he could control his victims' time and actions before death so that he could use it against the twelve agents. And, as we all know on December twenty-seventh, he obtained just what he needed. It was during this time that he's been most active. December nineteenth through December twenty-seventh… During this period, to the best of our knowledge, at least twenty-three individuals died because of heart attacks."
He paused, rubbing his feet together again. His eyes returned, once again, to hers.
"Notice anything… unusual?"
Kotone frowned.
"Why is he singling me out? He could ask anyone, but he chooses to ask me in particular. It would be best not to say anything to make him suspicious of me, but then if I don't say anything, would that make me stand out even more?"
"I'm not much of a television person myself, but… Kira usually aims for criminals in particular, right? However, these victims were different from Kira's previous targets. They were all alleged criminals, ex-convicts, or suspects in ongoing investigations, so legally, they were all innocent."
"And don't you see a connection between them, Kotone?"
"He's not going to leave me alone, is he?"
Pursing her lips, she tried a different approach.
"…No."
"What this means," Ryuzaki explained, his speech picking up the pace.
"Is that Kira had to manipulate those lesser criminals in order to kill those FBI agents. He killed that many people so that we wouldn't be able to tell the decoys from the people that were actually used. In truth, he probably only needed a few. He waited eight days, so there would be no time limit linking to their deaths."
"So, in short," Kotone added, hoping that if she spoke voluntarily, it would satiate Ryuzaki's urge to single her out,
"You think that Kira is one of the people under scrutiny of the FBI agents during the…"
She glanced down at the table, scribbling littering its surface.
"The fourteenth of December, and the nineteenth."
"I have no doubt," He corrected her, his urge unappeased.
"These are files provided by the FBI containing information you might find useful. For obvious reasons, you may not take them out of this house, which, Mr. Ide, I beseech you to find a place for these in your home, and again, for obvious precautions, Kotone, you may not look at them-"
"Wow!"
"We can cover a lot of ground with these!"
Ryuzaki's face twisted into one of irritation at being interrupted, but he seized control again,
"Does anyone have any questions."
It was a statement, not a question.
The ghost of a smile graced her lips, and an idea flitted across Kotone's mind as she decided to humor herself and ask something she already knew the answer to, but wanted to hear him say it himself, and return the favor of annoyance to Ryuzaki.
"Actually, Ryuzaki, I do have one question."
Ryuzaki's expression changed, and he became curious.
"It pertains to what you said earlier about not wanting to lose. Does the fact that you've shown your face to the investigation team and myself mean that you're against the ropes now, and that you have been overcome? Have you lost, Ryuzaki?"
His expression became more solemn, almost sad.
"That's right. By showing my face to you now, and by sacrificing the lives of twelve FBI agents, I have lost the battle."
His voice seemed to become suddenly deeper, a spark flickering in his mad eyes.
"But I'm not going to lose the war."
Seeing as how he was already on the subject, he decided to elaborate.
"This is the first time I've ever put my life on the line. I want to show Kira that we're all willing to risk our lives, if that's what it takes."
His face twisted again, into something that made Kotone want to grin herself, with the craziness of the appearance such a bizarre look a smile gave him. His voice lightened again.
"Justice will prevail."
His face fell again, becoming more serious. Kotone wished she had had her camera with her so that she might've taken a picture of that whimsical sight.
"Before we go any further, I need to make absolutely certain that none of you are Kira."
Kotone's body froze over.
"That isn't why he singled me out… was it? Could he really believe that I am Kira?"
The thought was laughable to her, but perhaps not to someone as suspicious and cautious as Ryuzaki, someone who didn't know her at all.
"… So I will have to speak with each of you individually before we leave today."
Ryuzaki walked over to the window, thumb pressed against his lips.
That man… L… Ryuzaki… Both were obviously aliases, but referring to the same man. Her fingers deftly danced across the keyboard… a ballerina making sweet music every time she stepped.
Ryuzaki had taken a man a piece into the kitchen to talk to him one-on-one, until all who remained were herself and her father. Matsuda had been the last to go besides her and her father, but she wished he would have been the first. She didn't mind others listening to her play, but it was a severe distraction to have one hover over her shoulder, which is exactly what he did, gawking at her as she played.
His interrogation over, he left without Kotone noticing, as his absence brought along bliss for her, and she lost track of time as her father entered the kitchen.
Her heart soared; singing like only music could make it do. Goosebumps ran up her arms and for a moment, she felt so sedated, submitting herself to the melodic sound of –
"Debussy."
Kotone's fingers immediately clasped together on her lap. She gazed over her shoulder, Ryuzaki looming above her. Her eyes widened, too shocked at his correct interpretation of the piece to be angry about being watched.
"You play?" She questioned.
A smile flickered across his lips.
"No. But I've heard of him. I can't play anything instrumental."
Her shock faded, turning back to her keys.
"You are most deprived."
Ryuzaki sat down beside her, pulling his bare feet onto the bench, pressing a low A key.
"Teach me."
Kotone laughed softly.
"You cannot simply learn to play piano on a whim. It doesn't work that way."
"I never said "Teach me to play right now." I merely requested that you mentor me."
She pressed the high C sharp key.
"I couldn't teach you even if I wanted to. I taught myself to play, so I cannot even read music. My parents will not pay for music lessons, so I suffice by listening to a piece, and memorizing it."
"That is impressive. I admire anyone who has taught themselves to play piano."
"It isn't just piano," Kotone replied, looking down at her hands.
"I've also taught myself violin, cello, flute, baritone, and clarinet- all of which I am still perfecting, of course. I've recently picked up the trumpet, but I don't like I'm going to go far with that one. Percussion and brass generally isn't my style."
"You own all of these instruments?" Ryuzaki asked incredulously.
Kotone shook her head.
"No, I only have a piano, and a cello, because those are my mother's favorites. There is a music shop not far from here, and the owner there lets me go in and play whatever instrument I desire, whenever I please."
"Perhaps… You could begin with something simple for me."
"You still want to learn?" She asked.
"I didn't think you'd have the time, Ryuzaki. With the Kira case and all- "
Ryuzaki raised his index finger in realization.
"Ah. I had nearly forgotten, your piano prowess is so mesmerizing."
"Thank you," Kotone replied softly, a blush creeping across her face.
"Spell out your daily routine for me," Ryuzaki instructed.
"I imagine you attend some kind of school?"
Kotone shook her head, slightly amused.
"No. I have graduated."
"Don't you attend a college of some sort?"
Her amusement threatened to explode from her lips.
"I graduated last year, Ryuzaki. I attended To-Oh University."
His eyes grew alight.
"To-Oh, you say?"
His finger went to his lips.
"If that is indeed the case, then why aren't you in the NPA?"
She bowed her head.
"At the time I was attending To-Oh… It was my last year there… My brother, Ichirou, two years my senior, was on the police task force… He was killed. After his death, my father thought I wouldn't be able to make it in the NPA if even Ichirou was killed. Both of my parents agreed that, even though I held top scores all throughout my years at To-Oh, they still had their doubts, and I never joined after college. I wanted to be a detective, and be in the middle of cases, but instead I'm stuck doing menial work at headquarters. I go in when my father does, but I'm never permitted to listen to meetings, and I sort files, but only before they're thoroughly checked by someone else to make sure I don't get my hands on anything remotely classified. My father's afraid that if I found out anything about his cases, that I would try and go behind his back and investigate on my own with the knowledge I'd discovered."
She clenched her fists on her lap.
"My father thinks I'm incapable, and that's why he prefers I practice music compositions over being at the station doing menial work anyone can do, and he doesn't even appreciate the arts in the least."
Ryuzaki dropped his hand, resting it on his knee as he turned to face her for the first time.
"What if I convinced your father to let you join the task force? Would you?"
Kotone gasped, her eyes flying open. Regaining her composure, she shook her head.
"My father will never agree. I thought you said earlier that you didn't want me on the task force anyway?"
"I said that to appease your father," Ryuzaki explained.
He thought a while longer, before replying,
"No, you're probably right. Your father won't easily be convinced. But it's too inconvenient to not have you on the case, but to still meet here… In this case… How about if I have you help me out behind the scenes?"
Kotone stared at him, horrified.
"You mean go around my father's back and work on the Kira case?"
"Well, you don't have to think about it like that. I'm sure that once you do something significant for us, he'll dismiss the whole ordeal altogether and let you stay on the investigation team."
Kotone laughed bitterly.
"You do not know my father. He is very unforgiving."
"Well then," Ryuzaki muttered, his finger returning to his mouth.
"I suppose that you'll just stay in the dark, then."
Kotone clenched her jaw. He was testing her loyalties, she knew this. But to whom did her loyalties fall? Her naïve father, or this confident Ryuzaki?
"Alright," She murmured softly.
"I'll work on this Kira case, but you must help me not be caught by anyone else currently working on the case. If I am caught, they will most definitely tell my father about it."
Ryuzaki pressed a small string of randomized keys.
"You have my word… Under one condition."
Kotone waited for him to continue, listening intently.
"I want you to go to listen to our conversations at headquarters while I have Watari, my assistant, bug the room for you. For now, I cannot install cameras without drawing the attention of the others, for obvious reasons I'm sure you understand."
"Yes."
"Alright… We will continue to meet here, but we will both have to watch what we say."
He turned to face her, his wild eyes gleaming with sincerity.
"I think that you are vital to this case. Besides, I still haven't decided whether or not you are in fact Kira, so I must keep a close eye on you nonetheless. Though I will be watching you closely, I still trust you to help me. Do you understand this?"
"You still suspect me?" She questioned, slightly insulted.
"Please don't be offended. I will suspect everyone as a potential Kira until their name is cleared from my suspicion."
"…I guess, I see your point."
"Now…"
Ryuzaki turned back to the piano once again, his fingers hovering over the keys. Kotone smiled softly.
"Let's start with something easy, like "Mary had a little Lamb". Now, do as I do, only on that side of the piano."
"How will I know which key on your side coordinates with the key on mine?"
"Well… Look at the distance from the end. An A here is an A… there."
"I see."
"Now, follow me…"
"Music is love, in search of a word."