Hey guys. This scene just popped into my head at ten at night and it was so sweet I couldn't resist. I hope I've been able to convey the emotions in this story properly. Edward's view.
While the Stars Rained Down
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It had taken me ten years to gather enough courage to face Carlisle about his chosen lifestyle. It only took one to return to him.
Ten years. In ten years, I had experienced high school, collage, and various humans. I had seen Carlisle change Esme. I had helped Esme fall in love with Carlisle, and when the time came, confess her feelings to him. I had been best man at their wedding.
Ten years. Ten years is enough witness love, heartbreak, pain, anger. Joy, sorrow, jealousy, longing. Ten years was enough to know that I belonged in the warm, loving arms of my parents.
And yet, I still felt…wrong? Forgotten? Indecisive. I wasn't sure if I was content living on animals. My true vampire nature was not completely overcome with just animal blood, the way Esme's and Carlisle's were. They were perfectly satisfied with their diet; I internally rebelled against it.
The memory of Esme's face as I told them of my decision is heart-shattering. She had been trying not to cry, trying to be strong and happy for her only son, but I could see right through her. She was terrified – of losing her son, of losing her mate. She thought Carlisle would come after me and I would attack him in a fit of blind rage. But the worst part of the memory is that it aunts me day and night, uninvited, unwelcomed, and completely real. So real. So damn real.
I justified my killings to myself by attacking only cruel beings that would willingly harm others. I thought that if I drained a man who followed a girl through the dark streets of night, I was doing the girl a great favour. Now I think I scared her more than saved her.
The blood of the humans satisfied my hunger, but repulsed my mind. I saw clearly the red eyes I had gained, and they displeased and disoriented me. The eyes of a murderer. I had grown used to the amber-golden hue of my mother and father. The eyes that used to be mine.
I hunted sparingly, spending most of my time sulking, trying to evade the memories. But there was no escape from the past. Thoughts of Carlisle and Esme plagued me every minute of every day. The way Carlisle's deep laugh reverberated off the mountains when we hunted. Esme's floating grace as she moved about the house, humming quietly. Her soft voice and his infinite wisdom. How they looked upon me, love and pride in their eyes.
The only time I was relieved of their faces was during the hunt. The few minutes of freedom as my mind calculated the best possible angle for the kill was welcomed. But when I finished, the images returned with a vengeance. The same picture always comes to mind as I watch the bodies burn; Esme, turning to Carlisle as I fled the house. I had circled the building a few times, each pass giving me a clear view of my parents as my mother cried into my father's shirt as he hugged her fiercely. Then the only things in my memory are the trees as I ran from my home, Esme's heartfelt sobs following me until I broke down and started pining for her comforting embrace. I had only gained seven miles before my want of love was rekindled, having laid dormant since Esme came into my life. It still hasn't left me.
There have been several times when my longing became too much and I started back to the beautiful house Esme had designed in Oregon. But my fears had always stopped me short. What if they didn't want me anymore? Had they moved on, moved away, found another young vampire to adore unconditionally? Had they forgotten me? Was I just another perfect, insignificant face?
So I remained the crimson-eyed killer, hunted in too many cities to count. Many saw me and called me the devil, but nobody guessed my true identity. Nobody guessed vampire.
Sometimes, as I wandered through the forests, searching the minds of unsuspecting humans, I'd catch glimpses of people who struck cords deep within me. People who looked like my parents. The woman with Esme's heart-shaped face. The man with Carlisle's compassionate nature. The children, twins, who shared their brilliant smiles.
On the evening that marked a year of my departure, I ignored my hunger and climbed the tallest tree I could find, scaling it with ease. I sat in the topmost branches and looked at the stars, like I had done frequently with Carlisle and Esme. That night, I allowed myself to remember them. I vowed to do so every passing year. Four months later, I returned home.
I arrived back the night of the meteor shower. They were sitting on the front porch, watching, waiting. I hid behind the tree almost directly in front of them, but they never noticed, as the wind blew my scent away. They watched the sky and I watched them.
Eventually, Esme sighed. "I wish he was here," she murmured. "It'd be lovely, to hold both of you and tell you how much I love you." Only then did I realize she was crying.
"I know, love." Carlisle soothed. He held her tightly and stroked her hair. "I know. I miss him too. There hasn't been a day gone by that I haven't thought of him." And it pains me all the more to see your grief, darling Esme. Oh, Edward, where are you? I wish you were here, to comfort your sweet mother. She's been desolate without you. He thought ruefully. As have I.
The thought of loving Esme in such agony nearly brought me from my hiding place. As it was, my heart felt as though it was slowly being ripped from my chest and torn into pieces, to be scattered among the stars.
For nearly an hour, silence was the only sound. Esme and Carlisle sat together on the swing, and I sat out of sight, hoping that I might be welcomed to those arms again.
A sudden shift in the wind brought my scent swirling towards the house. Towards them. Esme's head lifted hopefully, disbelievingly. "Edward," she breathed. "Carlisle, do you think…?"
Carlisle nodded and took her hand. "I think so, love."
Eyes shining with tears that would never come, Esme looked to the stars, wordlessly thanking them. "Edward, darling?" she whispered. Taking a deep, unneeded breath, I steeped out from behind my cover of the trees.
The next few seconds were of disoriented silence – I, because I had surprised myself by not running away, my parents at the shock of seeing me.
Esme was the first to move. "Edward?" she whispered again, her hand coming up to meet the air. Mine mimicked hers automatically. She smiled and stood, Carlisle along with her. They took a few tentative steps towards me before Esme let go of Carlisle and ran the rest of the distance. When she hugged me, it was as if I'd never left. "Oh, Edward," she sobbed "My baby. Edward."
"Hi, mom," I whispered hoarsely. "Hi, dad." Carlisle reached out and drew us both into a bone-crushing embrace. I buried my nose in Esme's abundant caramel-bronze hair, purely because I could. Her scent – cherry blossoms, with the faintest hint of Carlisle's smoky cinnamon – was bliss. It meant home, love; it meant I belonged.
"I'm so sorry," I whispered. "I'm so, so sorry. I didn't think…"I broke off, overcome by emotion. "I didn't think you'd miss me, because you had each other. I never imagined I'd hurt you as much as I did myself. I'm sorry."
Esme nestled closer than I would've thought possible and pressed her cheek against my collarbone, much like she had before. "Oh, Edward, you're as much a part of my life as Carlisle is. Sweetheart, if it weren't for you, Carlisle probably wouldn't even be my mate. We're so very thankful for that, and for you."
"But what about my…my absence?" I asked into the silky tresses. Esme sighed quietly, her whisper-soft breath brushing across my throat. "Please, don't apologize. We missed you sorely, but we understood you needed to do this. We're just happy you've returned to us, for however long your intentions."
"I don't want to leave," I said in a low voice, still speaking to the sweet-smelling wilderness of her hair. "Ever."
Esme made a delighted sound in the back of her throat. "Truly?" she asked. I smiled, giddy with the knowledge that I had brought her joy, after so many months of sorrow. "Forever," I agreed.
Thank you, son, Carlisle thought. You are, to us, more precious that the most beautiful star in the sky.
Thank you, Carlisle, for taking me in again, even after all the pain I've put you through. I don't deserve this. I don't deserve either of you."
"Lion, it is us who do not deserve you," Esme said. "Your going away showed us how fortunate we were to have known you, for however short a time. But, please, let's not dwell on this."
She untangled herself from us unwillingly, but took both our hands and led us to the middle of the lawn. She let go lay down on the soft earth. Carlisle and I followed unquestioningly, one on either side of her.
I looked at the faces of my parents – Esme, lovelier than the brightest star, and Carlisle, unearthly handsome with the eyes of time. Esme again held our hands as we lay in the dewy grass while the stars rained down around us.
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It's all about the stars, lol.