Title: Let Me Outlast This Life With You
Author: OpheliacAngel
Pairings: Roberta/Cassandra
Genres: Romance/Angst
Rating: Teen
Summary: If not in this life then in the next one.
A/N: Written for femslashficlets for prompt #024 - kiss. There must be something about this prompt that I like; this is my 3rd fill.
Soundtrack: Lyrics in the fic are from Sixpence None the Richer's 'Kiss Me.'
She feels out of it after Charles' death, as if nothing can snap her out of it. It's more than just out of it though, it's like there's a rope tied around her waist, dragging her out to sea.
Words… syllables bounce back and forth in her head but nothing registers. Nothing makes sense, she keeps on telling herself, trying to put emphasis on something, but nothing will give.
The others could leave her now and it wouldn't even matter. Sometimes she blinks and claims she's never heard about Murphy or the mission or why it was ever so important to her.
A warm hand slides into her own. It doesn't jolt her out of whatever she's in, but the moment freezes in time.
A part of her turns and Cassandra's bright eyes peer out from underneath her shadowed face.
The smile is sad, tragic, but it's really lovely too. For a girl so young there's a lot about Cassandra that she likes.
"We're never going to give up on you, you know. Right, Murphy?"
"Whatever you say, sweetheart." Roberta remembers that she should laugh at this, or snort, or maybe even cry, not just sit there slumped in her seat, everyone depending on her like they should but she not being able to deliver a damn thing. Still, it doesn't seem worthwhile enough to snap out of it.
Not yet.
"You just come back to us when you're ready, Warren." Another familiar voice floats from the driver's seat, and the name Doc rings in her mind before the word dies forever.
The only thing she remembers is Cassandra never leaving the space next to hers.
The razor wire comes out of nowhere and Cassandra is blood and pain and it makes everything in Robert's world come to a complete standstill again, and not in a good way.
Is the world against her now? Making her lose everything?
Her very sanity?
"It's okay, I'm fine," Cassandra looks up at them, avoiding Roberta's eyes. She says the words too late, Roberta has already panicked and is about to do much more. Cassandra's leg lies out in front of her at an awkward angle, bloodied and torn, and the sight is bad.
Roberta bends down and wraps an arm around her waist and another under her legs, minding her damaged one. She rises to full height slowly, careful not to jostle her. There is so much that has been damaged in Cassandra and Roberta doesn't need to cause further harm.
"Cass…."
Cassandra smiles, looking more at home in Roberta's arms than anywhere else Roberta has seen her. "You worry too much. Shit happens."
To me, Roberta thinks. Not to you.
But it's both of them this time.
Murphy may be the last to see Cassandra, but Roberta is the second to last.
She makes it count.
"Roberta…," her voice is raspy, weak, fragile like a butterfly. She's on the brink of falling into an abyss that Roberta knows intimately and has made it back from against even the odds she set for herself.
Something tells her that Cassandra won't be making her way out of this one. Goddammit.
It hurts. Physical ache in her chest. Pounding in her skull. Chaos. Self shattering. Maybe there was nothing between them. Maybe….
She doesn't care.
Roberta leans forward, mashing her lips against Cassandra's as if it will make all the difference in the world. As if this is the one thing that will save her, not just from this, but from all the things she never should have had to face in the first place.
Kiss me, beneath the milky twilight
Lead me out on the moonlit floor
Lift your open hand
The words open up in her head like a flower blossoming. She can hear Cassandra singing them - beautiful, lost, cut up by her past, bloody Cass.
"I'll come back for you." If not in this life then in the next one.
It has to count for something.
FIN