Sweater Boy
She can see the things she never wished to see.
Secrets.
Past.
Memories.
It was like a curse. But they said it was power.
She was bound to live the life of a beast.
She stood motionless and silent for a good half minute. Her chest heaved as she gasped for air. It was now a lesson for her, that running after some stranger shouldn't be done at all.
She took little steps forward to see whether this alley was really empty - and it was. It stretched thirty yards ahead of her, with no single soul around. Just dumpsters and bikes and nothing else. This was a desolate isle where the mysterious guy went through. Why she was still staring at the emptiness, she didn't know. She felt so compelled to find that stranger who grabbed her hand and pulled her out of the crowd when people went berserk after the train stopped at Fifth Avenue. When such brief, limited gesture made contact with her palm, she had seen unlimited, despondent memories. Well, it was not unlimited at all, but she assumed she saw enough to conclude that: he was special, more than herself, and she believed he needed someone.
She turned around, her green eyes cast downwards. There was a pang in her chest, disappointment - it was called, for she had not seen the mysterious stranger. Had she viewed his face she might have felt better, but no...his memories were the only feature of him she was acquainted. The dark gray sweater and the red sports cap he was wearing, those were his only identification. With nothing else to do, she walked away from that alley to attend school.
"Miku, why are you late?" an identical pair of green eyes glared at her as she slumped on her seat with a perfectly drawn scowl on her lips. It was only eight in the morning, and class wouldn't start until eight-thirty. Technically, she wasn't late. However, if she was trapped in that wave people in Fifth Avenue station, well, this question would be valid. Hearing no response from the interrogated party, the guy spoke again, more irritated this time. "Miku, I'm talking to you-"
"If you drove me to school, I won't be. Anyway I'm still half an hour early for school, Mikuo," Miku shrugged. Mikuo was her twin brother, born sharply eight minutes before her. He was the bully of the family - though in a comical way, the typical authoritarian who assumed the role of a big brother to her. She disliked him most of the times, but well, he was her sibling so...what choice was left to do besides loving your own blood, flesh and DNA?
"You move too slow," he retorted, shaking his head to brush his fringe away from his eyes. "I'm concerned with how poor you manage your time, Miku. I don't tolerate that."
Miku decided to let Mikuo say whatever he wanted to. It wouldn't change anything, anyway. Moreover, in a little way, she felt like she didn't owe him anything - for missing the ride, that is. The other thing was that...she met a very interesting person. She met a person who gave her a reason why her special ability wasn't a curse. It was a gift, so was the mysterious guy. She looked down on her pale palms and smiled at them. It may look like any other palms but why they were beyond human. That couldn't be seen from the shell.
"Why are you smiling?" Mikuo peered over her shoulder to stare at her palms too. Like most of their family members, he thought such ability a weird sorcery and thus Miku was labeled freak. To live with the ability to see people's memories through physical contact was a curse for the Hatsune family, and the so-called curse had been passed in their bloodline ever since. Mikuo was lucky it skipped him. "What have you done with those hands of yours, beast?"
"Don't call me that," Miku snapped at him. "I'm your sister, how could you? And dad has the same ability, Mikuo! Calling me a beast is like calling dad the same."
"Whatever. But what have you done? What memories have you seen?" Mikuo had no grudges against the said ability. However, after an incident when he asked Miku to look through the memories of the girl he liked so he would know how to win her, his twin saw unpleasant memories. Corrupted memories of the girl he liked. Soon enough, Mikuo asked his twin to limit the use of her ability because there were things they shouldn't be probing.
"And is it worth smiling for?" he asked again.
"It isn't worth 'smiling' for," Miku replied. "It's like...it's like I found the purpose of this ability. Every person is special, Mikuo. Everyone is. And we should understand what they've been going through. So...you better look for Ring again. She needs you."
Mikuo looked away from his sister. "I can't and I won't. Stop talking about her, the class is about to start."
That was a swift, cold dismissal from Mikuo that Miku didn't see coming. Sure, Ring was a sensitive topic for Mikuo, but she knew how much Ring meant for him. First love affected her twin so much.
Pushing the issue aside as well, Miku sat in silence. She turned her head to the door and watched her classmates came in. Most of them were hurrying to get in the class before the bell rang. It was a boring, tedious thing to do - to keep her eyes on the door. Miku sighed. Inside the classroom, watching her classmates was the only interaction she had with them...only if watching was a form of interaction.
Since her ability prohibited her to interact with people - or more likely she prohibited herself to - Miku had few to no friends. Sure, it was a good thing to know people so well, but she felt guilty for diving into someone's memories even if she didn't intend to. There were things better left unsaid, Mikuo was right, for memories held the darkest secrets concealed in someone's unconscious mind. Miku could see all memories whoever she would touch, from the most recently stored memory down to the ones pushed in the subconscious. The longer the physical contact, the more she could see.
The kids in her middle school before thought she was really good in fortune telling. However, all she could do was to read their palms and travel through their past. Only the past, not future. So it wasn't fortune telling at all. She could tell their favorite color and the last thing they ate; she could tell what was the very first gift they ever had in life. Nothing could be hidden from her, so long as her skin touches another skin.
Such ability made her popular in middle school. Making new friends was a piece of cake for her. Dealing with complex people wasn't hard, too. That was until she met Ms. Megurine, the school nurse. She was a friendly, kind and sweet woman. Miku met her when she sprained herself after a run, and hence was brought to the clinic. Ms. Megurine told her stories, gave her candies and sang her songs. Feeling like she had to pay back the nurse's kindness, Miku wanted to give a present for Ms. Megurine. She touched the woman's hand with a smile as she sincerely thanked her, but soon the smile faded and she withdrew her hand. Right then, she realized that humans were good, deceptive liars.
Ms. Megurine was not what she showed. She wasn't a happy woman. Her eyes which wrinkled whenever she would smile, were untrue. There were no traces of genuine happiness in her. What Miku saw with her were all fraudulent, a pretense to cover up what Ms. Megurine was going through. Her heart was beyond sadness, it was grief or something worse, and Miku had never seen such deep sorrow. She was too young to know what sadness really was. But Miku was able to witness an adult's vice. Ms. Megurine was having a secret affair with an old friend of hers, who was already married. Obviously, Ms. Megurine didn't like hiding her relationship with a certain purple haired man. Nevertheless, she was deprived of a choice. She was blinded with her love so she would do anything for him, even if that meant scraping her own skin.
It was a petty thing to peep into someone's memories actually, given that Miku was only twelve that time. She pondered about the truth she had seen, her mind was bothered so well, but after three days...Miku was back to normal. Why should she concern herself with others' lives? And so the little girl she was, continued her middle school life as though she was normal.
She and her twin turned fourteen the night of a certain meteor shower. Mikuo told her that he was liking a girl from their class - they were always in the same class - and he wanted Miku to look at the girl's memories so he would know what to give her. Miku, since Mikuo asked nicely, helped him. It was Ring Suzune, the girl he was fantasizing. She was a nice girl with pale blue her and kind smile. She was a good catch. Miku heard that the girl had a crush on Mikuo, too, but the guy didn't know anything about it.
One morning, Miku approached Ring during their gym class. The girl was carrying several boxes and she decided to help. When Miku touched her hand, she saw typical honey-sweet memories of a normal girl...until she saw something weird. There was a hazy memory full of screaming, it was from Ring, begging someone to stop. Her cries were loud and pained, and there was a laughter - a dark, husky one. Once again, Miku saw one of the vices of the world. Ring was being abused by her piano teacher. Miku saw his face, a gray haired young man with honey skin. She saw him once, not sure where, but he was called Dex.
The girl remembered how awful her reaction was after seeing such dark memory. Her vivid green eyes stared at Ring with pity, and yet Ring stared back innocently. Miku knew how hard Ring was trying to keep it, avoiding to let the truth slip from her tongue. Miku, unable to contain what she saw, quickly ran away from Ring.
Miku locked herself in her room the whole evening. Mikuo tried talking to her, but she knew it wouldn't feel right to tell him what she saw. After all, Ring didn't even want anyone to know that, let alone Miku - even if she tried asking.
It wasn't so long after she told Mikuo about it, but by the time he knew, he had given up his feelings for Ring. It was rumored that she was going out with a senior student, Kaito Shion by name. Mikuo would be lying if he said he wasn't affected. He was too obvious to deny he was hurt, for every time Ring would appear with in their field of vision - he would disappear. Miku called him irrational - he was - since it was pointless to avoid the girl he liked. Mikuo never confessed his feelings, by the way, so what was he up to?
"Stop it," Mikuo told her one cold evening. "Stop looking through people's past. I know that it isn't something you can control...but, stop. We're just humans. We have no right to probe people's past."
She nodded her assent. Miku had no reasons why disagree, in fact he was accurately correct. There were things better left unknown - but given her ability, that was rather paradoxical.
Starting from that day, Miku minimized her physical contact with people. She refused to shake hands with new acquaintances. Cardigans whose sleeves concealed her hands inhabited her closet. Miku was rarely talking to her classmates. All of these things continued until she became...aloof. She didn't hate people - she loved socializing and making new friends - but like what Spiderman said, 'great power comes with great responsibility'. It was her responsibility to keep her nose off from someone else's businesses. Unless involved, of course.
The pretense continued and she distanced herself from people. She established a casual relationship to most of her classmates, but she chose not to get close or attached to them. Her lunch was spent with her twin every day. If possible try would go home together. Miku was accustomed to such adjustment for the past years, and by the time she reached where she was right now, she was asocial.
It had been so long since the last time she talked to a friend. Her classmates from middle school would sometimes joke about her mind reading skill when they would bump to each other in school. Of course she would ignore them, replying them with an awkward laughter. It had been ages since the last time she touched someone's hand and traveled deeper in his memories.
So it surprised her this morning, when she felt like she was drowned being stuck in the crowd, that someone noticed her hard-time breathing and decided to pull her out of the sea of people. She did not regret why her hands were raised above her head, it was to avoid touching other people. However, when the mysterious guy in cap and sweater pulled her away - he was really tall, about six feet something - he held onto her bare hands. Miku was thankful that her sleeves rolled down a little, or else she wouldn't see such memories.
The memories she saw were nothing pleasant at all. They were like Ms. Megurine's and Ring's, other than his memories were blank. Their contact was so brief, it lasted like a blink of an eye, and the next thing she knew, he was walking away and she was out of the crowd. Though such fleeting flash of memory did not reveal a lot about the mysterious guy, she felt something way too despondent to carry by oneself. So Miku tried following him, pushing her way up to the escalator. The faint red cap, the gray sweater - she followed his lead. He seemed so close and yet he was far. People had been obstructing her way from time to time. He walked away, she watched him to. Just in time she thought he was right before her, she saw the alleyway where he went through - empty.
Miku came back to her senses when the first subject teacher walked in. The brunette who was no girl at all - she was too brusque, glared at the students seated on their desk. She slammed her book down on the teacher's table, and her silence talked instead. The guys went to their proper seats in an instant, and silence ruled their classroom. Meiko Sakine was the most intimidating subject teacher Miku had this semester, and sadly, she was teaching Mathematics. It was said that students learn best if the learning environment was non-threatening. Miku had to examine her Math class according to that standard. Why was she here again?
Miku dared to look around, trying to assume the teacher's role. She couldn't understand why Meiko was just standing in front, glaring intensely at them. So far, Miku knew that they were in the same classroom and her classmates were still normal. They were still confined inside the four pale yellow walls of this class, with the huge windows located on her left side. Nobody was absent today, all seats were occupied - well, except for the seat behind her.
Her head returned to stare at her math teacher. Meiko was still staring into nothingness. Mikuo leaned her elbows on his desk, growing uninterested with the staring nonsense their teacher started. Every day - every single day - Meiko would do this for about three minutes.
In all of a sudden, Meiko sighed. This was the first time - she was staring for only half a minute. The brunette reached up to scratch the back of her head, a look of - what was that? - uneasiness evident on her face. "All right. Sorry for that," she began. "We have a transfer student today. According to his papers he was from Australia and...you guys, you better treat him well, or else I will fail your 11th grade Math."
When no one dared to ask why was that so, Meiko continued. "He was a mute. No, technically he wasn't. He had this condition...that made him lose the ability to articulate words. Something like that."
"Is it contagious?" The girl seated from the front row asked.
"No," answered Meiko. "He's...it's...I don't think this should be discussed at all. Just respect him and do not isolate him. Do not suffocate him with your warm welcome as well, he might think you're feigning it." Meiko sighed once more and walked to the door. A tall guy followed her inside the class.
The new student was really tall. His skin was white as milk. Miku noticed a black earring on his left ear. The said piercing was so noticeable against his pale skin. Like an ink blot on a paper. His hair, golden like the sun, was pulled back in a ponytail. He quietly followed Meiko (which was expected from a mute or so), hands kept inside the pocket of his gray sweater. Gray sweater? Miku studied his physique. There was a faint red cap connected to one of the zippers of his bag, hanging as though it was a key chain.
It might be a coincidence, she thought. He didn't look like a person who would ride a crowded train, anyway. He seemed so aloof with those downcast eyes and neutral expression. Miku kept her eyes on him until he faced the class and Meiko introduced him. Len Kagamine, eighteen years old. He was living with his father in the second district, and he moved here just a month ago. His surname sounded familiar, for the coach of the basketball team had the same surname - Kagamine. Well, this new kid might be Mr. Rinto Kagamine's son, given the fact that the transferee had the same blond hair and blue eyes.
Soon, he was asked to take the seat behind Miku. Len did what he was told, and when his eyes met Miku's...there was no recognition. Yes, this guy wasn't the mysterious guy. Did the mysterious guy saw her face back in the station? She was admittedly not too tall, standing around 1.65 meters. Yes, she was small compared to her own twin and this Aussie.
There was something with the way he looked at her - or generally with the way he looked on things - which intrigued Miku. It seemed to her that he was glaring at everything within his field of vision. However, his glare lacked intensity. It was too early to assume though, but she was sure there was something. It felt so dead, so lifeless - the way his eyes gazed at her. For the first time, Miku found the dullest shade of blue, and it was in his eyes.
The whole class was silent and still. His steps resonated like a roaring thunder as he paced towards his seat. All eyes were following him with curiosity, watching him as if he was a walking specimen. Everyone was aware that students with special needs weren't supposed to be mixed with a normal class. A normal class couldn't tend their special needs, so it would be better if he would attend a school elsewhere whose facility could accommodate people like him.
Miku was one of those kids in her class who didn't watch him as he took his seat. Well, it was just Mikuo and her. Normally, she didn't care for new students (since she rarely made new friends ever since she saw Ring's past), but somehow, having this ridiculously tall Aussie in her class worried her. It didn't help that he was special.
The class had just begun, so she would better push the mysterious guy and the new kid in town out of her mind. It was just a coincidence - that he was wearing a gray sweater and red cap - and she knew, he couldn't be the same person. This guy looked like he hated humanity. Mysterious guy helped her back there, so...they couldn't be the same.
Miku grimaced at the sight of the physics notebook left on the teacher's desk. If she hated one particular thing about the class rules, it was the class-servant thing she didn't understand what for. With this pile of physics answer sheets towering before her, she would miss Mikuo again.
The sun was already setting, painting the sky with various colors. It was not only orange, but it also faded to a lighter shade of yellow above the horizon. It continued to fade with soft green, until the rest of the sky was pale blue. Too many colors, yes, but the thing was, it was time to go home and yet she had to bring these notes to the faculty room. Rolling up her sleeves, she divided the pile in two, picking up the first pile and walking out of her homeroom.
Her steps made loud echoes in the empty halls. Students had left the school building now, and the only faint noise she could hear was from the basketball team jogging around the open field. Besides that, there was a soft music coming from the music room at the end of the same floor. Recognizing the score being played, Miku stopped on her track. It was one of Bach's compositions, her most favorite song, maybe it was Aria, and for a moment she stayed to listen. Though she wished to see who was playing it - someone from the music club, perhaps, she couldn't. Duties were duties so Miku went back scurrying down the opposite direction and marched upstairs.
After a minute she ran down to get the ones she left in her homeroom class, and swiftly, she took the papers in her arms. The music was gone, she noticed, so she focused on carrying these papers. Mikuo could be down there in the lot, waiting for her. Better hurry or you'll ride the train again, she thought. But things happened in a blink of an eye - and she lost her balance when she turned around to take the stairs.
She fell back, papers fluttering in the air, and she braced herself to crash on the staircase and slid down to the base. Expectations (for most of the times) weren't met (like how she expected Ring's memories to be sugary sweet) and so she wasn't hurt. Someone caught her behind, the person's palms were placed flatly on her back. However, (yes, thanks to whoever her savior was) she couldn't move. One small movement she would fall again, because her body was inclined opposite the slope. The person pushed her up, it was forceful enough to bring her to the flat surface. That push, it was forceful and unkind. As if on cue, another music started to resonate. It had a pretty upbeat melody, quicker tempo - Miku was sure it was one of the variations. Everything seemed to resemble a funny scene she had seen once in animated movies. Or maybe she was too imaginative to associate the quick lighthearted melody to what was happening to her right now?
Miku stumbled forward, almost falling on her knees. Ah, that was a bit rude but she needed that push anyway. Turning around, ready to thank her savior, her eyes met his stoic orbs. The unsurprising meeting happened like that, with Kagamine standing a few steps below her. The afterglow made his face clear to her, and the more she stared the more she admired his cold beauty. It was as if the the setting sun was tattoing his face in her mind. Perhaps it was just her delusion to think that time stood still between them. The eye contact was broken soon as he ascended upstairs, walking past by her.
"Wait," she called, reaching out a hand to stop him. Her hand gripped his arm, slightly pulling him to look at her. "Sorry," Miku withdrew her hand. His gray sweater was still on, she noticed. She also saw how he kept an eye on her hand as she pulled away - maybe, he was someone who hated being touched. "We're from the same class, aren't we?"
Why Miku was asking a stupid question, she didn't know. Maybe it was an attempt to talk to this blond and confirm whether he was the guy from the Fifth station. Though that assumption sounded improbable too, because there could be a great deal of people wearing the same clothes that time.
The new student blinked at her, then shrugged, before turning his back to resume his walk upstairs. His steps were silent like himself, as though he wasn't really there at all. Miku watched his back as he continued to move: but his quietness - it was so eerie - it made her curious.
"Hold on," she called again, sounding breathless. When he stopped, she continued. "Aren't you living in the second district? Where exactly?" The blond didn't turn his head. Why was he so good in ignoring people? "Are you somehow related to Mr. Rinto Kagamine?" He shrugged and continued to walk upstairs.
Miku watched him leave until he was nowhere in sight. The notebooks scattered on the staircase looked certainly interesting the way they were. If she didn't care she would leave these things asa they were. But no, she had no time for being heartless as of now. The tealette ran down and picked them up as fast as she could, hoping that Mikuo was still waiting in the lot. The music continued the moment her fingers touched the first notebook, a smile adorning her lips. It was her sense of time that stopped, not the music, so what happened when she talked to Kagamine was a one-sided stand still.
Grinning to herself, she put the last item in her arms and ran upstairs.
"Huh? Is that so?" Mikuo stared at her with those scrutinizing eyes. There was no need to guess what he was thinking of her right now, he was probably reenacting the whole thing she had told him. Why was that sarcastic come so annoying?
They went home together that afternoon as though they were really getting along. Mikuo might actually be sick when he waited for his twin an hour ago, but did not say anything otherwise. Miku was quiet on their way home as well, so it was a surprise when she suddenly brought him up during their dinner.
Miku rolled her eyes and said, "Your eyes are telling how stupid I am."
"Exactly," said he, pointing his fork to her. Mikuo clapped his hands together, face void of any emotions. He never liked talking to her because...well, they had nothing to talk about. "Wow, I thought I was the only one who hated you at first sight."
"What?!" she couldn't believe he was saying this to her face. Yes, she should have not talked to him. Mikuo was a big jerk and nothing could change that - not even love. Once a jerk, forever a jerk. "You're such an asshole."
"An honest one," Mikuo shot her a droll look before stabbing the slice of meat on his plate. "Do you really expect people to be so friendly and whatsoever when they first met you? It didn't help that he was kind of incapable of talking. How was he supposed to reply, Miku? Use your head, sister."
"That's not what I meant, Mikuo. I mean he could be nice," her eyes stared at the ceiling, imagining what sort of niceness she wanted to see from people. "He could have smiled. Or something. I don't know."
"He doesn't know you," Mikuo barked. "There's no point in acting nice. You're unfriendly yourself, why are you so concerned."
"Eh? If I have a choice I'll be more friendly. But you know I can't. Don't lecture me when you know the answer, Mikuo."
"Really, we are arguing about this?" the twin brother leaned back on his seat, his arms a crossed his chest. "You're not the same with that Aussie kid. Don't compare yourself to him. He is normal. You are not."
He said it again.
Mikuo told the same thing.
She wasn't normal.
When words were often told, they lose their meanings. Miku knew what it was like to say a word again and again, until it felt foreign to her own tongue. She was eight when this realization dawned to her. It was during the summer break when she read aloud the word love for more than ten times and soon, she began wondering whether this word was really existing in the dictionary.
His words, those words, did not mean anything anymore. Her heart grew hard from the occasional mention of that fact - she, being a beast - and no knives and guns could break that hard wall around her heart. So long as the words were from Mikuo, maybe it couldn't hurt her anymore.
"Then tell me, Mikuo," she spoke up. "Is it wrong for me to desire a normal life?"
There was a weird pause between them. It was one of the few silences they shared together, the silences that exhibited no hostility. Their outlooks might be different, but both were arriving at the same end.
"Miku," Mikuo sagged his shoulders, eyes wandering around the dining room. He hated sappy talks as much as he disliked talking to her. A guy wasn't expected to talk drama, right? Miku was forcing him to act uncharacteristically. "I think it's better to be contented with what you have. That ability, I really don't know how to feel once you see people's memory - okay? That ability can be a curse or a blessing. It's up to you." He wanted to credit his recent readings about humanism. That made him sound wise.
However, some people couldn't react instantly. After what seemed to be eternity, he didn't hear a response from Miku. Mikuo, irritated because Miku's silence seemed ungrateful, snapped his head only to see a tearing up girl. "What the fuck, Miku?"
"I'm sorry. You got some big words there. I thought...I thought you're just a plain asshole. I'm sorry." she grabbed a glass of water and downed it. Yes, truly ungrateful.
"Screw you, little dork..." Mikuo rolled his eyes and went back munching his food.
"Yeah, love you too, Mikuo."
He was hiding something.
It wasn't his past. It was something else he didn't want anyone to see.
Months have passed and yet nothing changed. That was quite ironic though, for the clichéd adages were like 'change is absolute and inevitable' . Well, maybe the little things changed around them, and they were too insignificant to be noticed.
The days continued without breaking the tedium of life. Miku would sit on her usual place, ignore the existence of her twin, and complain to him if he would leave her behind. There were times she caught herself thinking of the mysterious guy from the Fifth avenue station. Knowing that their roads wouldn't cross anymore, reminiscing about such accident was quite laughable nowadays.
Instead of wanting to see more of those gloomy surface memories, Miku tried focusing on what is present. Past couldn't be undone. Future wasn't totally in our control. Worrying about these two was bothersome for her, so she decided to act upon whatever was in front her.
And that included her futile attempts to befriend Len Kagamine.
The months he spent in their school had done nothing to help him fit in the class. Well, he didn't look like he wanted to fit in, too. Miku's concern was his coldness towards them - his classmates, and his teachers. He was pretty decent in academics, that was nothing to worry about, however affectively talking, he was second to none. Ignoring and shrugging appeared to be his forte. No clubs, no sports, no friends. His relationship with his father was not going well, too. These were the observable characteristics Kagamine had.
In a nutshell, Len Kagamine was the school's enigma. He effortlessly earned that title and nobody desired to take it away. Though he was being himself, Miku wished to see what kind of person was hiding underneath that sweater, it was all thanks to Mr. Fox from Le Petit Prince. (That was supposed to be skin, yet his fashion taste was appealing to Miku.) She wanted to see his heart without using her abnormal skill. Through that, she could know someone the normal method. After all, Len's sempiternal silence interested her so much.
It was her curiosity taking over her. Just curiosity. Usually she wouldn't care about the people around her, (she was alone most of the times) so his solitude was luring her like a cheese to a mouse. Miku wouldn't be at ease until the answers were laid in front her. Why would someone isolate himself from people, anyway?
The power Miku inherited from her father was the root of her somewhat secludedness. In order to get rid of seeing gratuitous memories, it was her choice to avoid getting close to anyone physically and socially. On one hand, Len Kagamine was not like her. He was normal, save for his muteness which made him quite special. Whatever happened to him in the past, it resulted into the person he was now. Miku wanted to know.
She tried to know.
When she was a child, Miku loved to watch her father paint during his past time. The beautiful sceneries he would limn on the canvas never failed to mesmerize her. Some of his works included the mountains, valleys and rivers he saw in his imagination. He tried painting a memory, too - his own, though. And that painting was Miku's favorite.
A boy riding a bicycle, her father named it like that. Under the golden summer sun and bright blue sky, a young boy was riding his bike across the sunflower field. Her father explained that it was one of his unforgettable childhood memories: his first time riding a bike. That day as well, she decided to learn biking.
Mikuo had a bike of his own, but after he was acquainted to some of the boys across the street, he rarely touched it. Their father told Miku that he could use Mikuo's bike if she wanted, so long as she would ask permission to her twin before using. She was delighted with the idea of her learning to bike, however it never actually happened.
As a little girl, her attention was divided into many things. She wanted to meet new friends and impress them with her fortune-telling whatsoever (which was no fortune-telling at all). She was also learning how to paint that time. Helping her mother with cooking seemed obligatory to the young Miku (which was totally not, she was only eight). The summer break was almost ending when she realized that she was never able to ride the bike. When her father encouraged her to try, she refused.
"It always takes time to learn a new thing," she told her father, casting a lonely gaze on the bike. The remaining five days wouldn't suffice for her.
Her father chuckled, "But if you really want to learn, you will try. If you want to achieve something, do it as long as you can. The bike has always been here. It's just waiting for you to ride and pedal it down the road."
Funny, it was a wise advice printed in her mind but she had not yet encountered something where she applied his words. May it be in her past when she wished to ride a bike, or in her present. Miku Hatsune was given countless opportunities to know the new kid in their class. However, no matter how numerous these opportunities were, they only zoomed past her for she never reached out and grabbed them. So what she was keeping list of right now was the myriad of almost's with the mute, Len Kagamine.
Sometimes she envied Mikuo for his smooth interaction with Kagamine. Majority of the class denied the blond's existence since he treated the class the same. However, Mikuo was the exception. She happened to witness it one time during their gym class. The boys in their class formed teams to play basketball, where girls would officiate. Len was sitting on the bleachers, wearing his sweatpants. Of course, he wouldn't be Len Kagamine if he wasn't wearing his sweater on. No one was approaching the blond for the entire planning of team, until Mikuo crossed the court and talked to him. For the first time in the history, someone spoke to Len.
Miku watched her twin as he explained things to the blond, noticing how unsteady Mikuo's hands were when explaining. It was kind of funny to see that he never outgrew such mannerism. Whilst snickering at her twin secretly, Miku's eyes were casted down to Kagamine.
His livid, straight face and apathetic blue eyes...
The way he nodded and winced and the way he pursed his lips...
Kagamine Len was so lifeless.
"Hey, stop ogling the mute Aussie," whispered Luka, noticing the intense gaze Miku had on him. "He's kinda cute, no? I think you'll look good together."
Miku chuckled, looking away from her twin and Kagamine. "What makes you say? I'm not really interested with relationships and the like. I'm enough, I guess?"
"Eh? You seem compatible. Opposites attract, don't they?" Luka crossed her arm and flashed a goofy grin to her. If Luka was referring to her personality and Len's...it only meant she noticed Miku's minimal interaction. This pink head was starting an issue, really. How unfortunate.
It was Miku's turn to flash her a sarcastic grin. "Well, that applies to us if we are magnets. Sadly, we're humans. Sorry, Luka. Got to go," she looked around and saw the two crossing the court. "I'll go on my post now. Later." Miku ran away from the girl, Luka's laughter resonated in the spacious gym. She didn't think of what Luka said anymore, realizing that the chances of talking to Kagamine was near zero.
Or so she thought.
Her second encounter with Len Kagamine happened the day after their intramural sports. The sun was already setting the moment she reached Fifth avenue station. The late afternoon sun tinged the buildings orange and the cries of the gulls could be heard from the platform. The shore was just a few kilometers away from the station. Thus, on the silence of the dusk the birds' cries were always heard. As per usual, her angelic twin left her behind albeit she told him to wait. She was a part of the restoration committee of the class, so she helped in cleaning up their booth. However, Mikuo was someone who couldn't understand things when he didn't want to. Stubborn, if she would say.
The mysterious guy from the Fifth avenue station, Miku sighed. A part of her hoped to meet him randomly in the same station, but the other part of her believed that the first wish was impossible. This wishful thinking was simply contradicted the reality. The mysterious guy could be whosoever rides the train with her. He could be the quiet guy she sat next to the other day, or the middle-aged business man who walked past her just now. She would not know who's who.
Miku was seated on a bench, patiently waiting for the next train to come. There were few student commuters that time of the day, for school (and the event) was over some hours ago. She was mentally stabbing Mikuo for leaving her behind again - not like it was something new, anyway, when somebody poked her from behind. Luckily the tap was on her shoulder. If it that finger came in contact with her skin, she would see memories again.
The girl turned around in an instant, seemingly displeased by the fact that someone dared to touch her. Nobody knew about her ability besides Mikuo, but having someone to tap you like that was a friendly gesture, right? Maybe? She couldn't be so sure. At least in the past, that was what she did to her friends. And to heighten the banal effect, Len was standing behind her. His hands were now kept in his pockets, blue eyes piercing through her entirety.
Miku gaped at him, unsure how to react with his unexpected appearance. Yes, he was getting along with Mikuo a lot, but that didn't mean she finally mustered the courage to speak to him. Not when Luka was constantly pushing her to him.
She parted her lips to say something, however her mind couldn't think of anything. What came out of her mouth were the meaningless sounds that if combined together, she could have said hello. She remembered how she tried talking to him the first day he transferred to their school, but he was the lord of shrug, and that memory made today's attempt worse.
Instead of talking, Miku rose from her seat and attempted to think of a proper greeting. Maybe Len sensed her discomfort because a minute later, he gestured her to hang on. That ended Miku's stammering. How kind of him. He brought out his phone and began to type, perhaps he decided to send her a text so they could talk. Or the other way around. Miku formulated a lot of possible things he might say, knowing that Mikuo was hanging out with him. Was he Mikuo's apprentice? Was he trying to learn the art of annoying her? Unlikely.
Her train of senseless thoughts disappeared when she heard an electronic female voice, saying, "Hey, Mikuo's twin. That jerk left you again?"
It took her several seconds to digest what she heard. Oh, yeah, he couldn't talk so he typed what he wanted to say. All smart phones got the same text-to-speech whatsoever and...okay. She was spacing out too much. The blond was already raising an eye brow to her now.
"Hey! Ah," that's so lame. "Well, yeah. I'm Mikuo's twin. The clumsy girl from the staircase before, remember? I'm Miku, Miku Hatsune. And yes, that jerk left me again."
She watched as he nodded his head slowly.
"He's so nice. Anyway, didn't know you're taking the train too."
Miku smiled, or did something close to a smile. Her smile was too half-hearted to qualify as one. It was more like a dog's grin. "Ah, yes. I'm surprised that you are here, too. You see...uh, you don't look like you want to see people. No offense."
Len rolled his eyes, a smirk crossing his lips. That surprised her more. She didn't know that he was capable of doing other facial expressions! "None taken. Well, this is the fastest way home, so why not? Dad's staying late for his team. Is it okay if we go home together?"
"The text-to-speech engine doesn't read question marks, eh!" Miku thought. Had it not been told by the monotonous, electronic voice, Miku would conclude that this blond was really nice. He sounded nice already, she wondered how things would look like if he was actually talking. So that response she instantly said was, "Are you okay?" And that urged Len to give her an are-you-an-idiot look.
The blond worked on his phone again as Miku was left astounded. That was something she least expected to come from the antisocial Len Kagamine. Before she could assume that this blond had a secret crush on her, he (aka his phone) spoke again.
"To be honest, Mikuo asked me to walk you home because it's pretty late. But if you find me creepy, it's okay. Won't talk to you again. Sorry for bothering y-"
"No, it's okay! I mean, that's just a shocker..to get invited...by you. You know? I mean...uh, I thought you hate me or some sort. After all, Mikuo is the only one you're talking to in class." Things were escalating quickly, aye?
She was replied with his classic shrug. "Mikuo's a good guy. I guess I can expect the same from his twin. Unless..." Miku didn't hear what he ought to say next because the train came unnoticed by the two of them.
Mikuo was completely oblivious of the intense glare Miku was giving him. It was already eight in the evening, the orange sky gone. Their dinner was served on the table when Miku arrived as though it was solely waiting for her. Her amazing twin was on his usual seat already, leaning on his palm as his other hand was busy with his phone. She did not say anything, but the way she slammed her door meant something.
Len was living several blocks away from them. Of course she knew none of this until today. The blond almost came over to their house (he was kind of serious in taking her home), but thanks to his dad who stopped in front of them while walking around the neighborhood. She did not miss the reluctant look on his face, nevertheless he waved her a goodbye. That entire scene was weird enough for her. His worried face, however, did not leave her at ease too soon. So when she arrived home, all she could think of was to blame Mikuo.
Miku stomped downstairs and continued the glaring-thing she began earlier. She had changed into something more comfortable that time. When Mikuo looked up to her, his grin automatically unnerved her.
"Oh, what's this? Am I hearing 'thank you', Miku? You're welcome, dear sister." Mikuo put his phone away, grabbing his pair of cutlery.
Miku shot him a confused look. She couldn't understand what he meant exactly, but for sure this jerk was taunting her. "I don't know what you're talking about, Mikuo. But - oh! Thanks for going home without me. Again."
Mikuo's eyes creased as his irritating grin widened. "Why, you're welcome again. Finally got to talk to Len, aye? Come on, thank your big brother. I fulfilled your wishes, dear. I'm so sweet."
Curse him. Mikuo was praising himself! Nonetheless, his words made the female counterpart's face to burn red. Miku was sure that no one knew about it, that she wanted to befriend Kagamine. She hardly talked deeply with other girls. Keeping herself in character, she shrugged. "What are you talking about? I can't remember wishing anything that happen today."
"Ah," such bantering from the teal head wouldn't end so soon. "Someone's going to write a new entry in her diary today!" Mikuo said in a singsong manner, suppressing his laughter as he did so.
And so, she finally realized that Mikuo had done something below the belt. "You don't read someone else's diary, Mikuo! It's a diary! You're such an asshole!"
"Then do not leave your things in the reading room, miss. It's your fault," Mikuo stuck his tongue out and ignored her for the rest of the evening. After the dinner Miku had to do the dishes, which was originally Mikuo's task. When he began reciting the content of diary from memory (in front of their mom), she quickly yanked the guy back and promised to do his task.
The turn of events still favored Miku. Kagamine was now acknowledging her whenever they would see each other, and the blond's usual greeting was a slight nod. If it wasn't a nod, it would be a brief wave of hand. Miku always found herself responding to him and Mikuo was always making fun of how tame she looked like. The class began to notice this little interaction between the Hatsune twins and the Aussie mute. She was not surprised when Luka's taunts were chimed with the class hey, oi and yiee and other kinds of squealing. The blond seemed unaffected, though - and this was a relief for the tealette.
The little changes thought insignificant became noticeable. The Aussie student Miku used to address by his surname was now...a friend. Or maybe she could say that. Mikuo was always talking to the blond, though from a distance it looked like Miku's twin was talking to a wall. It was also observed that Len couldn't live without his phone, for the text-to-speech engine had helped him in all sort. She was considerably a friend of his now, but they had not talked so much like he did with Mikuo. They remained nodding and waving at each other, besides that nothing else happened. And Miku did not expect anything to occur beyond that.
"I'm not normal," she reminded herself one night, standing on the balcony of her room. There was a sad smile crossing her lips as she thought of it. Caring for people, getting close to them, would only bring trouble for her. Nobody should know her secret. She shouldn't know other people's secrets. The path of isolation was chosen long ago, and she knew that it was the best for her.
Amid her musing, Mikuo stood beside her and watched the distant city lights with her. "You're thinking about it again, aren't you?"
When it was Mikuo speaking, she couldn't be so certain what he was talking about. She shrugged.
"Len told me that he could speak before," Mikuo tattled, eyes fixated on the twinkling lights. The cool breeze blew on their faces. Silence ruled for a couple of minutes, and the older brother had to break it again. "I wonder what happened to end up like that. He said it was...traumatic. Then he walked out."
"You went overboard, Mikuo. I thought you knew better than probing people's personal matters," the female twin smirked. Yes, the tables turned now. How ironic.
Mikuo shrugged and looked away. He chuckled before replying. "He's beating around the bush, Miku. I know there's something more. One time I accompanied him to a psychiatric hospital. He's taking some meds. Depression, says he."
That was the news. The catch? They shouldn't probe deeper. "Enough, Mikuo. You know when to stop digging a hole. You can't find the treasure there." Miku left him after that. "And get out of my room, jerk."
"Sweater boy," Miku wrote at the bottom of her sketchpad. It was such a stupid activity they were asked to do in their art class. Their instructor randomly assigned them into pairs and tasked them to draw each other. And retarded fate tried goofing around again! She ended up with the stoic blond. Yes, back to his old self. Mikuo seriously went too far. This was what he got for breaking the rules he established himself.
It was late in the afternoon and the two of them were left inside the art room. The sunset behind Len dyed the sky flushing red, tinting the whole room with the afterglow. She could no longer see his face against the bright light from his back, but she was done drawing his face anyway. She named it Sweater Boy for the obvious fact that he liked wearing sweaters, whatever the weather was.
Len remained quiet the whole time since making noises was too impossible for him. Cold blond and his icy expression, locked inside a tall tower which isolated him from people. What happened to him in the past? Why was a beautiful creature, such as he, suffering from the fetters of solitude. Miku stared at his silhouette, watching as his hand continued to limn across his sketchpad. And as she looked at him, she wondered what was it like to live in a world where you couldn't hear your own voice.
"Y-you've been a good friend of Mikuo," she said softly. He only continued to draw. "Something's going on between you two, right? I apologize for my brother's... curiosity, I suppose?"
Silence.
She'd get a lot of it so long as Len was with her.
"I know he's been asking a lot about your past. I hope you'll forgive him for his intrusion. He's just like that, you know, when befriending people. I'm looking forward to seeing you hang out together again."
There was a ruffled sound. Len pulled his phone out of his pocket and began typing. Soon, she heard a response from him. "He didn't ask a lot, actually. I think I misunderstood him a little. This has nothing to do with my past, anyway."
Miku gaped. How foolish of her to assume things! Though Mikuo's a jerk, he wouldn't break his rules, of course. "Oh - oh, I see. I don't know what to say," she looked away, scratching the back of her ear. "Then I wish you'll mend whatever's broken with your bond, I guess? It has been ages since Mikuo was this concerned for someone."
"Yeah, I've never met someone like him. Actually, we argued because of you. Seeing him that overprotective of you, I feel ashamed of myself." Len tilted his head back to his pad. She wasn't so sure what kind of expression he was making. But deep inside her, she wanted to see it.
"M-me? What about me?"
There was a long silence. Len continued drawing.
"Len?" this was the first time she called him by his first name. It sounded pleasant and strange, and she caught his attention by just saying it. "What did I do?"
The red sun was no longer seen on the horizon. His face was kind of dim, but it was a lot clearer than his silhouette earlier. He dropped his pencil gently across his sketchpad - again - and began typing on his phone.
"I've been meaning to ask you out so I tried get some support from your twin. Looks like the plan backfired to me, though. He doesn't want anyone to date you. He told me a lot of reasons, some were quite offensive and inappropriate, so I ended up punching him. Sorry. His words are kind of insolent, even if you're twins. I don't want to hear someone talking like that about their siblings, you know." Len picked up his pencil again.
It was her turn to answer him with silence. Maybe it was easy for him to confess his liking since his phone was doing it in his stead, and maybe it was that easy because he didn't understand the situation. Mikuo was trying to protect Len from her, or her from reading memories. The first reason was more plausible, she sighed.
"I...I don't think you shouldn't date someone like me, Len. I'm... I'm not what I seem to be," she tried smiling, but heck, her vision was hazy. It was her first time to hear a confession, though it was more like a narration of events between Len and her twin. Besides, she wouldn't mind hearing such lie from a mute? How could he like someone he rarely paid attention to? He didn't even hang out with her. "I think Mikuo's right. Believe whatever he will tell you. And...I think I'm interested with somene else."
"I don't think I'm fine with whatever he is saying, Miku. By what right can he call you 'abnormal', 'freak' and 'beast'? That's too much." He wasn't lifting his head to look at her in the eyes. The room was getting dark now and the school would close soon. She could hear the training athletes doing their final round of jog. "Yeah, I already anticipated your rejection. Who would like to date a mute? Ha-ha-ha."
Miku chuckled because of the mock laughter. "Well, I'll tell you a lot more about my abnormality, Len. It's getting dark now. Let's pass this portrait to Ms. Sachiko and head home together, is that okay?" She stood and waited for him. All she could offer Len was a pained smile.
Miku wanted it vague and simple. "I'm not capable of loving," - that was all she said. Because seeing memories would lead me to formulate biased judgment about people - she ought to tell this but she couldn't. He only nodded at her and they stood in silence. And for once, the ride to home never felt this uneasy.
Memories could either be good or bad. All people had these two, whether or not in equal proportions. Miku, the teenage girl who descended from a family that could see people's memories, had her own good and bad recollections. Her bad memories might include the bad memories of others, but she remembered that something unfortunate happened to her during her first year in high school.
Bad memories, she had her own set, of course. In fact, the top of her list began with the name Rei Kagene. It was all done now, and she couldn't be bothered anymore. Past was a good place to visit, and she had no time to dwell upon things that couldn't be undone. What Rei had done was considered nothing today, knowing that he had been apologizing sincerely for the past years. Why not, he did something horrible. He was too obsessed with Miku back then, and he had to learn the difference of love from other kinds of attraction. And Mikuo gave him a good beating. All is well now.
Whatever happened to the past, it constituted to whosever she was right now. Miku knew that her twin was thinking the same about Len. But she wouldn't use her ability to him, never would she. Instead, what she had in mind was Len and Mikuo's friendship. She wanted it back. Badly.
But the two wouldn't cooperate.
"That's not a good idea, Luka!" Miku cried, standing from her seat. Her palms were pressed flatly on her desk as she glared at the girl in front. They were currently choosing the cast of the play their class would organize for their outreach program few months from now. Sadly, she was chosen to act as Juliet.
"I can't see why not. You are very talented with acting back in middle school," Luka smiled, writing the girl's name on the board. "Juliet wouldn't be a hard role for you. Why are you so worried? The kissing scenes wouldn't hurt - if there are. I haven't read the entire thing, you know."
As long as the role requires direct skin contact, Miku wouldn't take it. But how was she supposed to tell this? "No, I - I, uh, I don't like that play. I don't want to act. I swear I'll be of more help if you'll put me in the production-"
"And Romeo is Len Kagamine," continued Luka, still ignoring the tealette. "You look cool with each other, and we want to show the community that despite his inability to talk, he can do other things fairly well. Right, Mr. Kagamine?" Luka turned around and flashed the blond a smile. "All right, you two come over here and help me pick more of the characters. Him..oh, you,"
Len rose from his seat and walked beside Miku. He was about to grab the tealette's hand so they could help Luka, when the said girl was suddenly yanked away from the blond.
"I disagree with your way of casting," Mikuo conveyed clearly. "You should need someone who can actually talk. And I don't want Miku to play Juliet. She's ugly and all, you know. This girl is really bad with this genre! If you do something crack, she'll fit."
Len looked away from him, refusing to meet the green orbs of the male twin. Mikuo could tell that the blond wanted to say something, or if maybe he wanted to punch him, but with Miku in between them, she couldn't. The class was swallowed by silence for a good half minute. Len was typing something on his phone that moment, while most of the class was trying to decipher what Mikuo said.
Was that an insult or what?
"You should stop humiliating your twin sister, Mikuo. You don't do this to her in front of everyone," the female robotic voice articulated, breaking the silence of the class.
"You should stop butting in our business, Len. Miku is my sister, we are always like this." And Mikuo was not pleased that the blond was actually arguing with him in front the class.
The blond ran in front and stole the chalk from Luka, then wrote the words: "I am speaking as a concerned citizen."
"I don't need your concern. Please respect me the way I respect you. I did not probe further when I asked why aren't you speaking, did I? Enough of this, Len."
The sweater boy shrugged, his face stoic as ever, and walked out of the class.
"Pick me as Romeo, Luka. You take Juliet's place," Mikuo said and sat on his seat. He did not dare meet Miku's eyes, but then he didn't have the chance to do so. Said girl had run out of class, following the blond.
She trailed the blond out of the school grounds and stopped when she saw him on the children's playground. Moping. "Len," she called out. If everything could be explained easily, he would understand Mikuo. "Mikuo's a big jerk, I know. But he's right, I can't...do anything."
He did not say anything. Len simply stretched out his arm, handing his phone to her. Miku didn't know what is it for, but she grabbed it anyway. For the first time, Len spoke the truth about himself.
Len Kagamine had a younger sister back in Perth. His parents divorced when he was twelve, his sister six, and his father moved to a different continent to live his life. He and his sister were left with her mother. Len was a cheerful person back in his hometown and was known because he was playing for their school's basketball team. However, two years ago, a tragedy happened during their excursion trip. The bus they were riding was caught in an accident, resulting in multiple casualties. Len was one of the survivors, and his sister was among those who crossed the other side. A few hours before the accident, his sister was asking him to sing her a song so she could nap. However he was busying himself through talking to his teammates, ignoring his younger sister in purpose. After he was brought to the hospital and informed about his sister's condition, Len Kagamine had never spoken again. The cheerful smiles he was known to have, his active athletic life - everything! Everything vanished in a blink of an eye.
Regret ruled Len's heart as though it was a king and Len's spirit was its kingdom. He lived in silence - no laughter, no smiles, no cheers and no music. He wanted to take all the blame for what happened to his sister, and he felt extra guilty because he prioritized something trivial compared to his sister's request. It was just a song and yet he refused to give it to her. Now that his precious younger sister was gone, there was no use to speak again.
Miku handed the phone back to its owner. The sweater boy she knew was someone stuck in the past. He was someone pinned down by regrets. Len Kagamine was an open wound walking all by himself. She didn't have to hold his hand to know his dark secret now. And knowing something like this felt different compared to seeing memories unintentionally. The straight-face she used to know was no longer the cold, stoic mask she perceived. It was not coldness, not isolation, not hostility. It was loneliness that she was seeing.
Why was someone isolating himself from others, if he wasn't born with a special ability like hers? The answer was simple.
He was afraid to lose someone again.
He feared to be happy because he thought of himself as the living reminder that his sister was gone.
He perceived himself as the very example of regret that became a human.
He was isolating himself because everything felt improper - to be happy, to be fine again - believing that his lack of speech was the atonement of ignoring the last wish of his sister.
Miku stood in silence and kept an eye on the brooding blond. The draft message he let her read had Mikuo as the intended recipient. The tealette glanced down at him, wanting to see the real Len through his eyes. So she knelt in front of him, hands kept away from him, of course.
"Len," she called, almost a whisper. "I'm sorry...Mikuo must have hurt you very much. Are you seeing your sister in me?"
He winced and looked away.
She stared at him a little longer, quietly admiring the sweater he wore today. Black looked good on him. It made his skin whiter than it was. A smile crossed her lips as her eyes studied his face - he was really beautiful and attractive. She could only wonder why such handsome being was suffering from such loneliness.
Len cared for her. He only wanted Mikuo to appreciate his sibling, knowing how hard it was to lose one. This was the person clad with an invisible, frozen cloak. There was a kind, gentle and warm person inside the unfriendly shell of his.
Both Miku and Len, startled, looked up to the sky when they felt the faint drizzle against their skins. The sky was darkening and they didn't notice it since they walked out of the school. They kept their eyes on the clouds moving past above them, and all of a sudden, the drizzle was replaced by torrents of harsh downpour. Silently cussing, she ran after the blond.
Soon they found themselves sheltered under an abandoned building. The wind was icy cold, inviting shivers to run down Miku's spine. She didn't bring any jacket or sweater with her, feeling comfortable with her own loose-fitting shirt. The weather news didn't mention anything about the chances of rain, too - or she probably left earlier to see that portion.
Miku rubbed her arms repeatedly in attempt to warm herself up. No use. She was soaked. If she could run as fast as Len, she wouldn't be this drenched.
Soaked? Miku looked down on her shirt and realized that it was clinging to her skin. Her undergarment was kind of obvious now, and her hands instantly flew to cover her chest. Deep shit. How unlucky. Why wear candy pink bra today? Her face must be burning red now, for sure. She glanced to her side and saw Len staring at her, face flushed. So he had seen it as well.
"Y-ou! Do-don't look -"
Len quickly pulled his sweater over his head and shoved it to her, refusing to meet her gaze. Miku took it gladly and put it on. The blond was wearing a white shirt on, so taking his sweater was fine...until she noticed his pale arms.
Len was an artist. His pale skin was his own canvas. There were red to bluish bruises on his arms, some wounds were fresh and kind of bleeding. The bizarre lines covered his entire forearms much to her surprise.
These were sigils signifying how many battles he had won. He learned the magic to illustrate a suffering nobody aside from himself can see.
"Len, are you cutting yourself?!"
His blue eyes met her green ones. In silence she found his answer.
"The unbearable kind of pain was not manifested by the visible scars and fresh wounds.
A suffering unseen by others was bound to give the person a slow death."
She was running late again.
Miku found herself stuck in the mob of people at the same station where the similar scenario happened. She thought today was her lucky day, because after the incident about Len's self-harming, she felt that they drew closer than ever. It felt bad, though, because he wasn't making up with Mikuo yet.
Miku raised both of her hands above her head again. She knew that there was a big chance of getting stuck because the holiday rush wouldn't subside soon. Thanks to her mom for advising her to wear a longsleeved shirt today, it came handy.
The tealette groaned. This swarm of people wasn't moving even an inch! Miku distracted herself by staring at the ceiling.
Oh, she had told Len about her special ability. Miku recognized the glint of disbelief in his eyes when she confided to him yesterday. Well, she didn't expect him to believe it too soon as well. The thing was she was honest. Now Mikuo should know what she did...ugh, he'd probably get mad. Nevertheless, if Mikuo-jerk had heard Len's past they would come to an understanding. Certainly.
Miku also told Len about the mysterious person she encountered in the Fifth avenue station. He couldn't believe that Miku was interested to a stranger just because she saw a few memories of his. "You're weird," he told her. She only giggled. "Maybe we can be friends, too."
Her reminiscence was interrupted when someone yanked her away the crowd by the hand. She wasn't able to register what happened next as memories came flooding in like a tidal wave. Good and bad - joyful and unpleasant memories filled her mind.
Miku fumbled her way out of the mob as the unknown person pulled her out. He was still holding her bare hands. Miku's eyes trailed upwards from his hand, noticing his gray sweater and the golden hair sticking out of the ponytail at the nape of his neck. He had a red cap on, and she knew this was the same person. If only he would turn around...
They stopped. Slowly, he let go of her hand and faced her, removing the sports cap on his head.
Memories, whatever they might be - pleasant or not - they always...make who we are.
His blue eyes met her green ones, searching. Smiling.
"Len," she blinked, unable to register his genuine smile in her head.
Len pulled his phone out and typed something. "Have you seen my memories?"
Furrowing her brows, she reluctantly nodded. "I'm sorry, I should have not let you drag me out of..."
In all of a sudden (they were happening a lot - so many sudden, eh?), a cool, calming, unfamiliar voice caught her attention. She never heard it before, but it was sensuous? Such beautiful voice was raping her ears!
"Mi...Miku, welcome to m-my world."
Len smiled and held her hand.