Thank you all for reading.
Now here is "The Muse"! Enjoy. )
Preface
From childhood's hour I have not been
As others were; I have not seen
As others saw; I could not bring
My passions from a common spring.
From the same source I have not taken
My sorrow; I could not awaken
My heart to joy at the same tone;
And all I loved, I loved alone.
Then- in my childhood, in the dawn
Of a most stormy life- was drawn
From every depth of good and ill
The mystery which binds me still:
From the torrent, or the fountain,
From the red cliff of the mountain,
From the sun that round me rolled
In its autumn tint of gold,
From the lightning in the sky
As it passed me flying by,
From the thunder and the storm,
And the cloud that took the form
(When the rest of Heaven was blue)
Of a demon in my view.
-Edgar Allan Poe
Chap 1
The morning air was crisp and fresh. It gave off the feeling that sent your heart thrumming into pure bliss. These kind of days were one of the few things that allowed my mind to actually feel the grande sensation of happiness. I always loved to take a walk through the forest that inhabited my land or to just sit and stare at the trees being jostled by the wind. I was also completely content closing my eyes and listening to the birds sing or even the pitter patter of rain-drops.
Happiness was a RARE emotion to go flittering through my veins and I was RARELY a very happy person.
It wasn't that i had had a bad life or anything, I just never really enjoyed it. In my long 19 years of living, I had never found anything of interest. Love, friends, family, or fun were dead words in my vocabulary. The silly, desperate, fools of people end up hurting each other in their make-believe romances, and fake family bonds. It disgusts me.
Get one thing straight, right now.
My name is Kerrigan Night and I am COMPLETE with MYSELF.
I stood up from sitting on the bark of a fallen over sitca spruce that lie in the snow and began to walk through the cold powder toward my lone, solitary cabin of a house.
My home-made cabin stood in the middle of the snowy forest of Montana. I lived close to a small town called Bilings. I puposely moved out into the woods so I could be away from people.
I hated people.
I climbed up my porch and pulled open the front door, slipping of my snow boots before I walked in. Dora, - my beautiful Abyssinian of a friend - padded up to greet me. I sank down to the floor, balancing on the balls of my feet as I stroked her perfect, soft brown fur. She began to run the motor in her chest in response and groomed my free hairless hand as i caressed her.
Dora was one of the other few pleasures life held for me. I could sit for hours just stroking her chocolate fur or rubbing her white underbelly.
What a dog.
The shrill, annoying ring of my telephone struck into my brain like an arrow. I cursed under my breath toward the person who had dared to fire that bow and distruped my minute pleasures.
I stood up abrupty, - a little too abruptly, sending Dora into a startled "Mwrow" - and walked swiftly around the living room couch toward my phone's handset so I could cut off the bell-like protesting my phone was setting off. I pulled the cordless phone to my ear.
"Speak," I demanded, my tone hostile in my aggrivation.
"Kerri?" Asked my boss. Benjimen Bernard, the owner of the only book store in Bilings.
"Speak," I repeated, so much authority in my voice you would think I was the boss.
"I need you to come in tomorrow. I know it's your day off, but if you do this for me, you wont have to show up on Thursday." He seemed to be pleading.
I pondered that for a moment. "Caitlynn?" I asked unesissarily. I knew exactily why she wasn't showing up tomorrow.
"She caught quite a bug. Said she is practicaly living at the toilet."
Well, fine. "Very well, then," I monotoned. I pulled the reciever from my ear and pressed the end button.
That bitch of a Caitlynn was trying to get back at me for not loaning her money for car repairs. I barely knew the woman and she asked me for two-hundred dollars to fix her bumper.
"Please, Kerri? Please? I promise to pay you back when I get the money. I swear." She had pleaded when I had stared her down the first time she had asked.
Even if I had known her, I would have still said no.
She had one thing wrong in her pitiful scheming though, because she wasn't getting me back. I would be getting time in a half while that worthless pig stuffed fatty foods down her throat, watched soap operah's, and pretended to be ill. I laughed out loud at how inane she was. The only reason I had a t.v. was so Icould watch the news every now and then, not to get caught up in over-dramatic love stories that were altogether sickening.
My stomach snarled an interruption. I looked down at Dora, - who was politely waiting at my feet - and smiled.
"Dinner time."
"Mwow-worw"
I laughed at my favorite person and strode into the kitchen to make somthing to eat.
I loved how Dora seemed to know what I was saying. I would talk to her all day and everytime I wouldpause at the end of a sentence, she would respond with a meow. Well, Dora didn't really MEOW. It was always more of an "Mreow." Or a "Mrow-fow." It made her sound more sophisticated and smart. Even though her intelligence was hard to doubt when you heard her perfect, pretty, feline voice. I'de bet my months sallary that you couldn't find a cat in a sixty-thousand mile radius that had vocals more beautiful than Dora's.
I opened up my larger than normal pantry and my keen eyes spotted Dora's cat food. I quickly found a bowl and poured the strangly shaped food pellets into it. She purred while she ate.
Dora wasn't the only one that was hungry. I sat at my kitchen table, staring blankly at the wall, thinking of something I would like to prepare for myself. I was in a very Fettucini Alfredo mood, but I didn't have the ingrediants nor did I have the patience. I finally decided on some instant rice and chicken.
I removed the frozen chicken strips from the freezer and put the slices on a frying pan to cook. I put a lid on the chicken while I made the rice. In fifteen minutes the rice was done, and around six minutes after, the chicken was as well. It took less than that for it to disappear.
****
When I woke up in the morning I mentally cursed Caitlynn for bailing out. I REALLY wanted to go back to sleep, and I briefly considered doing just that. No. That wouldn't be the right thing to do. I had two hours till I had to go to work, so I slid out of bed and walked into my bathroom.
It was one of the tidiest bathrooms you would ever see. Everything was neatly folded and arranged to provid the most room without looking cluttered. The room didn't have any wallpaper, but the wall was painted white; matching the most of the appliances.
I took a shower, enjoying the smell of raspberries in my shampoo. It was a short shower; My showers were always short.
After I had toweled myself off and put on some underwear, I looked at myself in the mirror.
I always had a clear face, only having acne when I was around fourteen; but even then it was never very bad. My long nose arched perfectly between my eyes. My visabilly green eyes.
I had always loved my eyes. They went perfectly with my long lashes. I thought they were my best feature beside my hair, that fell naturally a few inches past my shoulders. It was pitch black and curled slightly; an effect some women spend hundreds of dollars to partially obtain.
I never have put anything on my face besides lotion, and not just because I didn't need it. I just quickly washed my face with a damp washcloth, and went to get dressed.
I found my handbag and went to fetch my car keys when I was fully dressed, wearing blue jeans and an ivory turtleneck that complemented my hair. I gave Athenodora a goodbye pat and she let out an odd "Grouf" in farewell.
I adored my car. It was simple and stylish and didn't take up much room at all. My little Black Sedan. I always kept it clean because I loved how it looked all dark and shiny. I unlocked the door, hoped inside and drove down my gravel driveway.
Even though I lived in the woods, if you followed my driveway, it would only be a five or six minute walk untill you hit Cheary, the old country road that lead to Bilings; Then just a fifteen minute drive to town.
I had just enough time to stop at an Ihop or a Dunkin' Donuts for breakfast; I went with Dunkin' Donuts.
After I finished my food, I headed over to Benjimen's Books. It was on the northern side of town next to a Baskin-Robbins. It was a simple square building with a red roof to catch the attention of drivers.
I fished my keys from my handbag after I locked up my car and went inside to open up.
I noticed Ben had ordered some new books and set them on the counter for me to organize into the shelves. I did just that after putting away my things in the checkout's desk.
The day was starting out very slowly . Only a few customers came in and only two actually bought something. Don't get the wrong idea, I didn't mind at all, I actually preffer being alone. It gave me time to sit at the checkout desk and read from a book of mixed poems from numerious poets.
Oh yeah; I love poetry.
I was quite the poet myself. Nothing proffesional, but it was something I did in my spare time. I would sit outside, listen to the nature humming it's tune and wrote whatever I felt. It was my vice.
As the time progressed, I was starting to feel utterly bored. It happens everytime I'm working. I'm not even in a bored mood when it happens, it's like a mental timer that goes off in my head and then it's overwhelming. I actually resorted to playing solitare on the computer one day, and I hate video games.
When my watch gave an annoying beep, indicationg my lunch break, I hurried out and closed the store for the time being. I desperatly needed to get out and streach my legs. I walked down to the Quiznos that was down the street. I had to cross a few crosswalks but that didnt bother me.
I order the roast beef sub with the brooth dipping sauce. It was wonderful. While I ate my boredom started to ebb. Good, this was just what I wanted, eating always seemed to calm me down. After I had finished and thrown away my liter, I headed back to Benjiman's Books. Even though my trip was extreamily short, I still was late. I was glad when no one was waiting at the doors for me.
I unlocked the door and stashed my handbag in the check-out desk's drawer.
My little lunch trip had satisfied me and I felt very blissful. I was very eager to open up a book and continue reading poetry. Unfortunatly it was only two minutes until I was interupted.
"Excuse me," Said a cool, soothing voice. It reminded me of a water trickling down a stream in the summer. I looked up from my book and stared into cold, ice blue eyes. They were the most beautiful things I had ever seen. I cocked my eyebrow as I took in my intruder. Nevermind to that last thought; HE was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. His nose was even straighter than the one occupying my face, and his eyes obviously surpassed mine by a large sprint. His short, black hair was just as fair. It was cute and boyish and it layed on his head perfectly, almost messy. I guessed he never had to do his hair in any odd ways to make it perfect. It was naturaly beautiful.
I stared coldly at him for a long awkward moment. After a while he figured out that I wasn't going to repley.
"Er," He said, his words flowing through his lips with pronounced grace. "Could you point me to the R's"
I looked back down at my book before I motioned my hand lazily toward the north-east corner of the store. Sure he was undoubtedly beautiful, but that didn't change anything. I still hated him and couldn't wait untill he left so I could be alone with myself again. I heard him stir and I looked up just in time to watch him walk gracefully in the direction I gestured toward. It was amazing the way his legs moved, his movements flowing together with unprofound grace; Somewhere in the back of my head, I wasn't totally convinced he was a man.
Nothing Human could look so magnificent.
And his eyes... they were utterly sublime.
I looked back down at my book, but I wasn't reading at all, I was in deep thought. He startled me internally when he spoke.
"Will you ring these up for me?" I met his eyes, then looked down at the three books he had stacked infront of me. With an annoyed sigh, I dog-eared my book and began scanning the novels. I had to admitt, he had good taste.
First, I rung up a classic: Phantom of the Opera. I could have cared less for that story, but it wasn't as bad as what I have seen over the years.
Second, was something I very much enjoyed myself: Selected Poems. Not much of a title, but you don't need a very good one when a very famous auther/poet's name is slapped right on the front cover; Edgar Allan Poe.
Last, Dracula. I should have assumed he would check this out. If he enjoyed the Phantom of the Opera, he would probably like Bram Stoker too.
"Twenty-two, ninety-five," I said when I was finished, waiting for him to pay before I handed him the books. He ignored my hostility and reached into his wallet that he had already fished out. He handed me a fifty. I scowled mentally; A twenty and three ones would have been nice. I gave him his change along with his books and then sat down with MY book and started to read again.
"Thank you," He said after a long second or so. It shocked me that he hadn't left. What was he waiting for? I sighed. I should just respond so he'll go away.
I turned to the beautiful eyed man. He was smiling at me.
"Sure," I said, emotionless. I was playing along now; He will probably leave sooner.
The man - which looked to be around his twenties - pulled his eyebrows together and his eyes gave a swift interrogation of my face. I saw numerous emotions flash across his expression, all of them to fast for me to register, and then, he decided on being amused. His perfect brow lifted, and he smiled.
"Have a nice day," He said as he turned on the balls of his feet and left.
I burnt holes in the back of his skull.
****
"Gruh-fow," Athenodora greeted me when I walked in the door. My sour mood instantly evaporated when my eyes met the green of hers. She meowed and purred and rubbed herself against my legs while I hung up my coat and handbag. When my hands were free, I crouched and gently carresed the hair of my furry friend.
The sudden snarling of my insides reminded me of how long I had gone without food, so I stalked over into the kitchen and made some chicken soup.
Nomatter how bad you are felling, your'e never bad enough to befall a hot bowl of Cambells.
I snarfed down the hot soup before it had enough time to cool off, ignoring the sting as it burned my tongue; I was too tired and I wanted to get some sleep.
When the soup had dissapeared, the bedraggled bowl was sitting alone in the sink, Dora was fed, and the doors were locked, I went into the bathroom to clean up before bed.
I washed my face and brushed my teeth, went to the bathroom, and then finally crawled into bed, in total abatement.
Only then, when I was tightly curled under the sheets, did someone decide to knock on my door.
I was furious! I had, - on my day off - given in to Ben's pleas, gone to the store, lolled threw my shift, all the while putting up with the fact that Caitlynn was sprawled out on her couch, passed out with an empty ice-cream carton laying limply in her arms. I had given up on loungeing in the uncommon sunshine, a thick wall of vegitation between me and anything HUMAN, and RIGHT when I want to lay back and rest, SOMEONE had to come and RUIN it for me!
I furiously stomped down the hall and into the living room, fervently hopeing that the short-sighted, soon-to-be-cripple, could hear the loud smack of my slippers.
In my blind rage, I had some difficulty unlocking the dead-bolt, but when it slid aside, I swung open the door and glared into shockingly beautiful, ice-blue eyes.
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Woo!
I'll try to get the next chapter up soon, and I'm already half way through so it should be VERY soon.
Reviews are love.
-Nightongale