A happy b-day fic to me. A dedication fic to Dah-ling. 09.20.
"That was amazing, Jounouchi-kun!"
Blushing bright red, Jounouchi rubbed the back of his head nervously. "You really think so?" he asked breathlessly.
Yuugi smiled at the blonde and gave him an enthusiastic 'thumbs up'. "Definitely, although I didn't think you'd actually do something like this though…" the short boy replied, "I also didn't know you could act so well."
Shrugging, Jounouchi stuffed his hands inside his jacket pockets.
"I thought it would be fun. Besides, we had to practice a lot--"
"Yes, because bonkotsu(1) here is hopeless," a voice interjected.
"Kaiba!"
Jounouchi spun around and glared at Kaiba. He hadn't been the only one who had problems during rehearsals, so Kaiba had no right to say anything to him. Still, when confronted by the brunet, he couldn't help but remember the incredible performance Kaiba had given just a few minutes ago.
---
I've never quite understood the concepts "Life" and "Death". For me, life was never just an occurrence--it was fate--while death was a choice. A choice I had to face before I even knew of "Life".
When faced with this choice, I didn't choose it, only to be cursed with this godforsaken immortality, where I am forced day by day to watch in pure jealousy as those around me continue to fall dead, but I am wrongfully denied that same right.
---
Looking between Kaiba and Jounouchi, who were too busy glaring at each other to notice that he was still there, Yuugi felt a bit uncomfortable. Maybe this was something he shouldn't interfere with; after all, he was not part of the play.
"Um…" Yuugi began, unsure of what to say, "Kaiba-kun, Jounouchi-kun…"
"What!?" the two snarled unanimously, shocking Yuugi with the intensity of their response.
"I have to go now. It's pretty late and ji-chan(2) is probably worried…"
With this little confession, Jounouchi mentally berated himself for completely ignoring Yuugi. It was kind enough of his friend to come and watch him perform, but to stay after the show to personally congratulate him was something he shouldn't have taken for granted.
"Sorry, Yuugi," Jounouchi apologized.
"Not a problem, Jounouchi-kun. I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"
"Yeah."
Now that Yuugi was gone, Jounouchi could finally go back to what he had been doing before, but Kaiba was already walking back to the dressing rooms to clean up. Jounouchi gazed longingly at the brunet's back. He wanted to talk to him--really talk to him now that their first and last performance was over.
---
They speak the truth when they say you only want what you can't have. Now that Death is no longer just within my reach, how I long to have my life extinguished.
And so I take the lives of those innocent before Death can have them, if I am not to be allowed the same. Hunger. Frustration. Need. I am Death, but how I desire that Life that you hold within.
---
In the dressing rooms, Kaiba was busying himself with looking for his clothes, tired of being dressed likes a vampire, despite his trench coats bearing a significant resemblance to his current outfit. Because of that, he was caught up in his search and didn't notice Jounouchi at all, who was staring at him from one of the corners of the room, lost in thought.
Thoughts of Kaiba, of course, and thoughts about the play.
There was so much Jounouchi wanted to say to Kaiba--so much, but there was no way he could tell Kaiba about it. He had been surprised, at first, when Kaiba decided to participate in a school play put together by the drama club. That, however, was completely pushed out of his mind when they had been assigned to be the two leading roles.
Since then, so many emotions he wasn't ready for began to stir inside him. Every time they switched into their roles, a part of him wanted it to be real, wanted that to be them and not just roles they were portraying. At first, he had been angry at himself for foolishly wishing for something that was impossible, but the more he continued to play his role, the more it felt so real to him, almost like their characters were them, just in another form.
Or maybe he was just being foolish, again. But, no matter. 'Even though it was only for a while, we existed.' Jounouchi thought bitterly.
---
Maybe you understand this?
Who am I kidding?
Of course you don't. You're just another mortal that'll be dead soon anyway. I shouldn't even waste my time telling you this. Good night, my Dear and sweet dreams. When Tomorrow comes, you'll have no memory of this or even your own existence.
---
Turning away from Kaiba, Jounouchi walked toward the exit, having already finished changing and packing up his things. He couldn't help but glance back at Kaiba, though, knowing all too well that this was probably the last time they'd ever work together, that pretty soon they'd be back to their old routine and that same distance will be there again.
There would be no more close moments with the brunet. Jounouchi wanted to laugh at how much he hoped that that wouldn't be the case, but he wanted to cry even more.
Jounouchi pushed the back stage's exit door wide open and walked out, a brisk breeze meeting him immediately. Wrapping his scarf tighter around himself, Jounouchi glanced idly around the empty parking lot. Naturally, there was nothing interesting about the scenery before him, but he wanted something to take his mind off those thoughts.
"Move, bonkotsu."
Pushing down a surprised scream, Jounouchi made a strange squawk and swiftly shifted to the side, his arms wrapped tightly around himself, but he didn't stop looking at nothing in particular, blatantly ignoring the new presence. What really threw him off was that Kaiba didn't leave, and instead stood there next to him.
---
Emptiness. Loneliness. Desperation. Your eyes are just like mine. Mine.
"Kiss me."
Why not, it's just a kiss, a parting kiss.
Good-bye, my Morning Star.
---
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"What the hell, bonkotsu!?"
"I just felt like screaming." Jounouchi grinned; he had gotten tired of the awkward silence, but he was really telling the truth. Screaming just felt like the most reasonable thing to do, and it was refreshing, too. He no longer felt drained like earlier. Kaiba glared at Jounouchi, who only snickered at his outraged expression.
"Care to tell me why?"
"No."
"…"
"It's a secret."
Kaiba stared at the blonde. After a few moments, though, he gave up and looked at everything else that wasn't Jounouchi.
"Hey, Kaiba?"
"What?"
---
I am just an idea, sometimes forgotten, but forever. I cannot stay, for I feel like I've spent too much time here, and now I've wound up back to where I started. I'm not even sure of what I am anymore. I have nothing because I am immortal.
"But you're alive. Isn't that good enough?"
Good enough?
That's right…
I'm alive.
"For now, maybe."
---
"Kiss me."
---
So I can forget, so I can live, laugh and die, if only with you. If only with you.
---
Kaiba looked at Jounouchi with wide eyes. Jounouchi frowned jokingly, and raised a finger to his lips in mock thought. "What? You won't do it?" He smirked, and walked onto the parking lot. "Of course you wouldn't, since it's not acting, right?" Jounouchi asked a bit sadly, although the bright smile on his face didn't show it. "See you later, Kaiba!" Jounouchi got ready to walk away.
Why had he asked such a thing from Kaiba? Maybe it was just the play, or really, maybe it was something he had wanted for a long time without realizing it. It just felt bizarre, like they were part of something neither was in control of. Then again, it could just be his imagination.
"Bonkotsu!"
Eyes widening and his feet frozen in place, Jounouchi found himself unexpectedly pulled into an embrace, and what's more, a kiss. Although rough and sloppy, it was a real kiss, and not just those fake rehearsal ones. However, before Jounouchi could feel more of the kiss, Kaiba let go.
"Kaiba?"
"I only did it to prove you wrong."
Feeling his rage build up, Jounouchi grabbed the collar of Kaiba's shirt and pulled him down so that they were eye level. "KAIBA!"
Smirking, Kaiba grabbed the blonde's arms in his and squeezed them to loosen their grip. "What, make inu(3)?"
Jounouchi was about to retort, but then something flashed in Kaiba's eyes, something that was a combination of things he'd seen before in those blue orbs, but there was also something else--something new. Suddenly, he didn't feel so anxious like before, almost as if everything made sense again.
"You asshole…" Jounouchi muttered as Kaiba continued to smirk.
It certainly felt like normal again, back to the same routine--always the same--except this time, something had changed.
---
Tomorrow never comes.
---
Fin.
(1) bonkotsu: Mediocre/Proletariat
(2) ji-chan: An affectionate/close/childish way of saying "grandpa"
(3) make inu: Loser dog
A/N: … /grins/ Well, that was fun.