So I've finally gotten around to writing my first Mamalade Boy fic! Yay!... I wonder if anybody even reads MB fanfiction nowadays. I dunno. Well, I'll aim for a reader group of 2 people to actually read and review this, though I'm now starting to wonder if that is overly optimistic… --;; Anywho, to get to the point of this paragraph, I OWN NOTHING!!! Though I'm starting to wonder if I should say I own everything related to Marmalade Boy, just to see if anyone would actually get in a tiffy over it. So yes, let's scratch the "I OWN NOTHING" statement, and replace it with "I OWN MARMALADE BOY AND ALL THE CHARACTERS!!!" Who knows? Maybe someone will actually get pissed enough to complain about me and try to get my fic removed. I doubt it. We'll see what happens!

Chapter 1: It's THE Feeling

Satoshi woke up one fine Thursday morning with a strange feeling. A feeling that tingled down from his head to the tips of his tippy toes. Yes, he had woken up feeling remarkably gay, more so than he ever had in his life. His mind was flooded with the images of men, many men and brief flashes of abs, biceps and triceps. Of course, any person to wake up with such random feelings would know that they had been choice selected as the main character of a yaoi fanfiction. But, our poor student council president had failed to receive the memo regarding this important information, and found himself confused by his sudden desire for the touch of facial stubble and hairy chests.

"Wow, I have never felt to deliciously queer before," Satoshi said to himself, his mind churning rapidly. He suddenly knew what had to be done. He needed to find himself a super hotty boyfriend. Immediately the thought of Yuu penetrated his brain (if only it penetrated something more…) but then he thought against it. Miki often had the blonde in a vice grip of sickly loveness. Besides, back when they had thought they were brothers, all Yuu did was bitch about his past, and buildings, and drawings of buildings, and how he felt betrayed, and other feelings, and more buildings. Satoshi really didn't feel like dealing with that shit, so he settled on a pair of mediocre blue eyes, and brown hair.

Satoshi nodded to himself in certainty. "It's decided! I'm going to make Ginta mine!" And seeing the fic genre they were in, it wouldn't be terribly difficult. As it was, Arimi had conveniently left on a vacation with her parents to… someplace very far away… permanently… so now Ginta was more than up for grabs. Sure, Miwa had never really talked much to the shmexy tennis player before, not to mention ever seemed remotely interested in him during their time in high school together, but things were different now! Quickly the blue haired wonder threw on some clothes and scrambled out the door. He had a heart to steal, and he had no time to waste in doing so.

Meanwhile, Ginta felt an undesirable chill creep down his spine as he walked to school that very same morning. Something odd was brewing and he didn't know what. Though he didn't concentrate much on it. He was too busy sulking over the loss of Arimi on her eternal vacation with her parents. It would have been nice if she could have given him an estimate of how long she'd be gone for… 3 months? A year? Several decades? She hadn't even given him that. All she had told him was that her parents had randomly decided it would be nice to go off somewhere as a family. Indefinitely. She had given him a phone number to reach her at, but it was only four numbers long so he didn't think it was terribly legitimate.

"Oh Arimi…" Ginta sighed, "How could you just leave me?" He wasn't allowed to think on that much longer, however. A sudden painful jolt of what almost felt like electricity zapped his body, making him forget entirely about the Suzuki girl. Afterall, this is a yaoi fanfiction. Having sentimental straight thoughts is punishable by death. Ginta shook off the painful feeling that had come out of nowhere.

"What the hell was that?" He wondered audibly so we would all know what he was wondering. Suddenly the sound of footsteps came up behind him.

"Ginta, there you are! I've been looking for you!"

Ginta twirled around to find himself face to face with none other than the main romantic love interest of this story, Satoshi Miwa. Something strange took over the brown haired boy's body. It was as if a shining queerness had completely filled him, rendering him breathless in the presence of the older boy. Urges he had never felt before surged through his veins, forcing him to step closer to the man of mullet… until he remember a vital piece of information: He, Ginta Suou, liked large bouncing bosoms! Nice perky boobies accompanied with round, firm bottoms; none of these did Miwa possess. Both his chest and his booty were flat, flatter than a wall. Certainly he couldn't be attracted to this shapeless being! That's when it hit him.

"Oh shit! We're in a gay fiction, aren't we?!"

Satoshi stared at him blankly. He didn't really have a good grip of what fiction was in general. Sure, he had been in the library thousands of times, but back then he had just been stalking Meiko. He didn't actually ever read anything. So therefore Ginta's comment flew directly over his head.

"Ginta," he continued, breathing heavily as he stepped closer to the tennis player. "I need to-"

But Ginta had already run for it. The strange homosexual longings had started to stir up again, and the only way to keep himself from doing anything against his character, was to keep a good fifty yard boundary between himself and the problem at hand. But how long could he hide when a horny author was out to get him, bound on putting him in a steamy corn holing situation? Perhaps there was no escape, but at least he was able to prolong the inevitable for one more chapter… for now.

--To be continued---

As I was writing this one, it occurred to me the people reading might think I have something against gay people. I don't. I've just noticed that yaoi fanfiction writers enjoy taking to straight characters and then making them ridiculously, uncharacteristically queer. I was simply keeping as true to that as I could. I hope you liked it! If so, I'll write another chapter.