I do not own Blindspot or its characters.
Jane had been quiet since leaving the hospital. Too quiet. Kurt glanced over at her as he drove. "You okay?"
"I just . . ." Jane shook her head slightly. The witness they had come to question had been discharged before they arrived, but the man they had lingered to talk to had been worth the fruitless trip, the story he shared with them both unexpected and thought-provoking "I can't help feeling bad for that old man, that's all. He made one mistake, and now his family's abandoned him to die alone."
"He abandoned them," Kurt said harshly. "No one forced him to leave his wife and children, and run off with his mistress, Jane. He made that choice of his own free will, so don't blame them for exercising theirs now in staying away."
"Still . . ." Jane's heart ached at the sadness she'd seen in the old man's eyes. "He made one mistake and paid for it his whole life, Kurt. One stupid decision in a moment of weakness cost him everyone he loved." Just as it nearly had her. Though in her case, it was lies that had nearly proved her undoing, not infidelity.
"Jane . . ." One look at her expression had him cursing his careless words. He knew how sensitive she still was to reminders of her own wrongdoing, even after all this time. He whipped into a nearby parking space and turned to face her, threading his fingers through hers. "You and he have nothing in common, you know that, right? You made one ill-fated decision in an attempt to protect the people you loved, never foreseeing the consequences, and he did exactly the opposite.
"And it wasn't just one stupid decision in a moment of weakness," he added. "Adultery in the case of a married man who takes his vows seriously, as he claimed to—" as any man worth his salt did, "—is a series of choices, Jane. He chose to return that first flirtatious glance, to befriend her and be alone with her at every opportunity, to accept her affection when his wife was too busy raising the children he helped create to give him what he felt was his due. He didn't just fall into bed with her on the spur of the moment. He made wrong choice after wrong choice after wrong choice."
"I know," Jane assented, thrilled that Kurt had such a clear-cut sense of right and wrong, but still unaccountably saddened by the old man's fate. Cheaters were scum, no question about that, the lowest of the low, but it was a shame that his children, at least, hadn't found it in their hearts to forgive him, to be at his bedside in his final hours. If not for his sake, then for their own. "Marriage is only as strong as the weakest partner, right?"
"Exactly." Kurt idly fingered the wedding band he had placed on Jane's finger nearly two years ago. "It's easy to say the words, but staying faithful through better or worse . . . that takes real dedication and determination. If you go looking for an out, you can always find one."
"Have you ever . . ." Jane hesitated, ". . . been tempted?" She didn't need to ask if he'd acted on such an attraction; he would no more commit adultery than she would mass murder. Kurt Weller was a Boy Scout, the epitome of integrity, and she would be more than happy to face off against anyone who ever suggested otherwise.
His character was simply unimpeachable.
She'd like to think both of theirs were.
"No," Kurt said, trying hard not to be offended that she felt the need to ask. He understood that she was at her most vulnerable right now. It was why he had allowed her to accompany him out into the field today. "Never been tempted. Not when I was with any of the women I dated in the past—" he let go of her hand and gently brushed his knuckles across her cheek, "—or with the kick-ass woman I married. Especially not with her," he added.
Jane smiled ruefully as she glanced down at her protruding belly. "Not so kick-ass at the moment." She was eight-and-a-half months pregnant, and growing more and more certain every day that she was going to pop like a balloon if this kid didn't arrive soon. Her feet hurt; her back ached; and she had been so moody today it was a wonder Kurt hadn't thrown her out of the car. Her due date couldn't come fast enough.
Kurt leaned across the console and kissed her. "You're still the most kick-ass woman I know. And I'm more in love with you than ever, Jane Weller." They'd had a rocky path to love, but his choosiness had paid off in spades.
"Even though I look like a beached whale, and we won't be able to have sex for weeks after the baby's born?" Jane asked mournfully. Logically, she knew she would be too tired to care with a newborn at home, but it seemed like a huge sacrifice at the moment.
Kurt couldn't contain the laugh that shook him, but he sobered quickly as she frowned at him, not wanting her to dissolve into tears as she was prone to do lately. "Even if you looked like a beached whale," he assured her. "Which you don't." He hesitated, sensing she needed more reassurance. "You know my mom left us as kids. Several months after Taylor . . . after my dad was accused in her disappearance."
"Yeah," Jane said softly, unsure where he was going with this. Even after nearly four years as a couple, that was about the extent of what she knew about Kurt's mother. Neither he nor Sarah ever wanted to talk about her, and she had never pried. She had her own painful childhood memories that she preferred to keep locked away, so she understood.
In fact, she loved him all the more for it.
"She was one of those people I mentioned earlier, the kind who are looking for an out," Kurt told her. "I didn't realize it until years later, but even before . . . even before Taylor disappeared, she was seeing another man. My father being accused of the crime simply provided her the excuse she needed to leave us and feel justified. Sarah was convinced for a long time that she'd realize her mistake and return, and I held out hope of that for awhile, but I figured out pretty early on that she was never coming back. I promised myself two things that day."
Oh, Kurt. Jane's heartache intensified as she pictured her husband as a young boy being forced to grow up all too fast, no doubt determined to be a rock for his little sister, if not his father. No wonder he had been so vehemently against the old man's actions. She had half a mind to track his mother down and give her a piece of her mind. As a soon-to-be mother herself, she couldn't fathom how any woman could abandon her children, even if she had tired of their father. She reached for his hand and threaded her fingers through his as she waited for him to continue, squeezing tightly to offer him what comfort she could.
"The first . . ." Kurt said ruefully as he caressed her hand with his thumb, ". . . the first was that I would never get married, because I didn't ever want to hurt like that again." He'd thought he could go through life without ever getting close enough to anyone to risk getting his heart ripped out, and he had been succeeding admirably in that goal until Jane came crashing into his life. She had torn through all his defenses before he even realized they were down.
"You mean I convinced the most stubborn guy I know to change his mind about something so life-altering?" Jane teased. "I'm honored."
"Oh, trust me, Jane," Kurt retorted, "I really—" he brought their joined hands up and kissed hers, "—really wanted to." He wasn't the most romantic guy, but he had obsessed over the proposal for months, wanting everything to be just right. Afraid if it wasn't perfect, her answer might not be yes. A fear which had proved ludicrous when she was in his arms kissing him with teary acceptance before he'd even had time to finish asking the question.
"So . . . what's the second thing?" Jane asked.
"The second . . . the second was that if for some reason I ever broke the first, that I would stay faithful to my wife, no matter what. That no matter what problems we faced, or how tempted I might be to leave, to find someone else like my mother did, I would make every effort to work things out with her. And as long as we were married, hers was the only bed I would be in." He had added that last part later, when he was old enough to understand what fidelity truly meant. His eyes softened even more as he looked over at Jane. "That first promise was easy to break, but the second one . . . the second one has been a joy to keep."
Was it any wonder that she loved him as she did? Jane's eyes blurred with tears, but before she could respond Kurt went on. "And you . . . you don't ever have to worry about me falling out of love with you if we have problems now and then, or if we get too busy to have sex for awhile, or if you gain a few pounds here and there. I'm in this for the long haul, and I love you for who you are, not just your physical appearance.
"In fact—" he placed a hand on her belly, caressing it gently, "—you've never looked more beautiful to me than you do now. I'd given up on the dream of being a dad, but you convinced me to take that risk, and you're giving me that, and I love you so very—" he punctuated his words with kisses, "—very much. You and this baby, Jane, you're all I want. All I'll ever want."
"That's good," Jane said as calmly as she could manage, panting slightly, "because you're about to have both of us. I think you'd better take me back to the hospital, Kurt. My water just broke."
And twenty-one hours later, when he held his daughter in his arms for the first time, Kurt knew the old man had been right. Nothing in the world could ever top this—and nothing in the world would ever be worth throwing it away.
They were a family now, and he was going to cherish them forever.