Welcome to A Darkened Soul! Thanks for dropping in!

I started this earlier this week and finished it today. I didn't want to wait a week like I usually do to let it simmer before going back to edit because I'm stuck at my house for Hurricane Matthew and wanted to get it out before something happens or in case something happens. Feel free to favorite and review, and if I survive I might extend or change the ending so lets hope I do.

The intro is based off of the video "Miraculous Ladybug Episode - My Birthday Party | Tales of Ladybug & Chat Noir" you can find it on YouTube on the Miraculous Ladybug channel. Basically, she remembers everyone in her class except Nathanael, so I explored what could happen there.

Dear Diary,

It's my birthday on Saturday! Mom and Dad said I could have some friends over! It's going to be awesome!

So, who am I inviting? Alya, that's a no brainer! There's no way I could celebrate my birthday without my BFF! I'd so love to invite Adrien too! Only problem is, I don't know if I could ask him without turning bright red and stuttering like crazy! Oh well. If I can't do it, I'll ask Nino to help! He's a really great guy!

So Alya, Adrien, and Nino! That makes three. Then, Rose and Juleka! They're not at all alike, but they're both super nice! I could also invite Ivan! He's a bit of an old grump, but he's always nice to me, so yeah! I'll invite him too! It'll make Mylene happy, because I think she's got a bit of a crush on him!

Then there's Kim, the class jock, and Max! Kim's always challenging people, and Max is only into math! But, they're both pretty cool! I'll also invite Alix, the other sporty one in my class!

Hm… am I forgetting anyone? Oh, right! Chloe and Sabrina! Wait, what?! Am I crazy?! I'm not inviting them! They make my life a misery! Lets just hope Chloe doesn't ask her dad-the mayor of Paris-to throw a party the exact same day! That would be so not cool! Okay, I think I've got everybody! Oh, I can't wait! This is going to be so great!

Nathanael lay down his pencil, staring out the window. Something was off. He glanced back down at his drawing, the back-haired blue-eyed girl smiling back up at him. Sure, he needed to add in a few more lines, but that definitely wasn't what was wrong.

Honestly, something had been feeling off all week. He'd been sick Monday and Tuesday, and was barely conscious Wednesday. Thursday and Friday, though, everyone seemed to be talking about some wild party. He didn't know whose party it was, or why, or when. He figured it was probably someone in another class they all knew, like Maggie. A lot of people seemed to talk to Maggie during lunch break, but she never really talked to him at all. Granted, he was usually drawing during lunch, but… If Maggie was throwing a party, he wouldn't be surprised if she didn't invite him. She didn't even know him, that was a perfectly respectable thing to do.

His muse hadn't been at school Thursday. He was hoping to give her a present, but she was a bit busy all of Friday and he didn't get the chance then either. So now he was simply drawing yet another portrait of her. Maybe he could get the guts to ask her to maybe model for him! No… that would be weird, wouldn't it? Whenever he had asked people to model for him before, they immediately assumed he meant 'draw me like one of your French girls' modeling. I mean, sure, Marinette was technically a French girl, so he would technically be drawing her like a French girl, but not like that! That was weird, drawing her like… like...-the mere thought of it set fire to his cheeks and made his heart race.

Some love song crooned from the speaker of his phone, but was muted for a moment as a text notification came in. Probably Rose. He picked up his phone and looked at the message.

Rose: [Hey, Nathanael! Where are you?]

What did she mean? Where else would he be? Unless that party was today. Who's party could it be? Was she expecting him to be there for some reason? He quickly typed out a message and sent it.

Nathanael: [At home? Why do you ask, did you want to hang out or something?]

He let out a sigh and swung his legs out, sending his chair spinning away from the drawing desk. He leaned his head back and stared at the ceiling fan. Maybe he should find a new hobby. He'd stopped making the Super Nathanael comics a long while ago, but his pencil still instinctively drew the shape of Marinette's face whenever he put it to paper. She covered his notes, his sketchbooks, it was practically unconscious. And frankly, after he had been akumatized, he realized.. It was actually kind of creepy. Probably? He didn't see anyone else drawing their crushes in their notes-Ivan and Mylene never did it, that's for sure. Was it because he was an artist, or was he really a creeper? Maybe he should get into landscapes? He could probably make more money painting landscapes than drawing the same girl over and over again, even if she was beautiful. Even self-portraits would be less creepy; maybe a bit conceited, but not creepy?

His parents had been asking him questions about her anyways. At least, whenever they were around. Which was rare, but every time they were around, they asked. It was getting annoying, to be honest. Leave him alone to an empty house for five years, then suddenly start asking him about his crushes every chance they got as if they were a normal close-knit family or something? They only started coming back into his life when they heard about the Evillustrator's little library stunt and put two and two together. Didn't care enough before, why did they care now all of a sudden?

His phone buzzed in his pocket, prompting him to look at it again.

Rose: [I figured you'd be here, at Marinette's birthday party! Is everything okay?]

Nathanael nearly dropped his phone. Marinette was the one throwing the big party?! How had he not put the pieces together! Everyone loved talking to Marinette, and it was her birthday today! That's why he had been trying to give her the present! God, he was so stupid-

And she hadn't invited him. Even as a shudder racked his body, he was typing out his next message to Rose. She deserved to know why he wasn't there, to quit worrying over him and have fun at the party.

Nathanael: [Rose, I wasn't invited.]

He felt his heart sink as a sigh escaped him. She had invited everyone in class except Chloe, Sabrina, and him. Had she really lumped him in a group of uninvitables with that twosome of terror?! Was he really that creepy, so creepy she was scared to invite him to a birthday party?! Or… did she hate him? Hate him as much as she hated Chloe? Was it because of what had happened when he was the Evillustrator? He had tried to drown her… oh, dear God, he had manipulated her into going on a date with her and then tried to drown her, of course she'd hate him! How could he be so stupid, how could he have ever possibly thought he had a chance! Marinette was this beautiful, nice and kind girl and he was just some creep that sat in the back of the class drawing her over and over and over and over and-

He stormed over to his desk and began scribbling out the drawing he had been working on, then ripping it out of his sketchbook and tearing it to pieces, pencil gripped like a dagger. His tool of creation was now a tool of destruction as he began to X out or scribble out every single drawing he had done of her.

Hawkmoth's window had whirred open the minute he stepped into the room, the sudden light sending his butterflies in a fluttering frenzy as his footsteps disturbed them from their rest. He felt such negative feelings in the air. Somewhere in Paris, someone was waiting to be akumatized. Someone he had akumatized before. He had been distracted before, but now… The Evillustrator was ready to strike revenge on the one who had broken his heart. He just needed a bit of coaxing.

"Ah, hopes and dreams shattered and emotions laid bare. The heart of an artist was broken today. Perfect prey for my akuma!" he held out his hand, and almost immediately a butterfly obeyed his call and landed in his palm. He sent dark energy through it until it was black and purple; a powerful akuma, capable of forcing whoever it possessed to obey his every will. As soon as he was done, it flew away, delicate wings taking to the air and homing in on its target. "Fly away my little akuma! Make this broken heart go cold as ice!"

Nathanael was halfway done. At this point, tears were already beginning to make their way down his face. He couldn't hold it in anymore. He hadn't cried in a long time, and everything was bursting forth. Every time he had ever needed to cry but hadn't let himself was pushing its way into his head, even when he tried to hold them back. But most of all, the fact that the nicest girl in class despised him. Even thinking of Marinette brought a fresh wave of tears in his eyes. His delicate drawings were being ruined by the pencil just as much as by his tears.

He heard his phone vibrate and turned to look at it. Probably Rose again. He went for his phone but saw a blur of black before his veins ran cold and a purple haze overtook his vision.

"This is your chance to exact revenge on the girl who wronged you. You've suffered a great injustice, Evillustrator, and I am willing to help you right your wrongs. All I ask is a few items in return. This is your second chance. Are you willing to take it?" a deep voice purred in his head. Hawkmoth wanted to take control of him again, to make him disappear and inject the Evillustrator into his place.

After being akumatized once, one would think he would have been able to resist. And a part of him screamed for him, begged for him to stop, to not let him win. But it was just the smallest part. He had been hurt so much, and now he had a chance to express it in something more than just some worthless drawing…

"Gladly." the venom in his voice was thick, and all sense of reason seemed to die away, all sense of Nathanael seemed to die as the shadows enveloped him and his body went numb.

This is Chapter 1, I have two more chapters to go! This one was kind of short, but the next one is fairly long, and then the last one is kind of short again. Sorry about that. But I hoped you liked it!