Silent. Quiet. Empty.
That is my life now
I have my books and artifacts that I have collected
I have various gifts I've received over the years
I have myself
Most of myself
But not what matters
I sit in my apartment
The world moves on outside
In here silence engulfs everything
Nothing much has changed
Everything has changed
Silent. Quiet. Empty.
I removed the bandage from my neck
The doctors told me I shouldn't for two weeks
I did anyway
It doesn't matter
Everyone knows what I did
No use in hiding it
I don't want to hide it
I'm not worthy of them
To be a part of that elite group
I don't deserve their support
their strength
their comfort
their love
them
Silent. Quiet. Empty.
Even though I tell myself it doesn't matter
It does
A small part of me is screaming out to try and make it all right
But I won't let me
It's better for them to work this out on their own
Without me
But I wish they knew why I did it
No
It doesn't matter
Gunn came
I didn't want him here
He needed help with something
I wouldn't
I just wanted to be selfish
Just once
Not be the solid rock that they turned to with their problems
Or the sensible leader who knows what to do
Or the translator who messes up
He said it was Fred
Fred
I helped him anyway
In spite of my self
Then that small screaming part of me weaved its way out
I told him to explain my side of the story
That it was the only reason I clung to life
I realized what I was doing
I stopped
I gave him the bottle
For Fred
I hope she'll be okay
I kicked myself after he left
I shouldn't have said that
It wasn't true
It was true
I tell myself to be quiet
It needs to be this way
Silent. Quiet. Empty.
They don't need me anymore
They can do it
I have faith
In them at least
Not in much else
I don't need anything where I'm going
I have lost all I had
Everything important
But
Did I every really have it?
I thought I did
Not I'm not sure
I'm so confused
Silent. Quiet. Empty.
My life is simple now
My life is complicated
My life is empty
My life...
What a joke
What is there to live for now?
How do I go on this way?
When do I leave?
Where do I go?
Why bother?
Who cares?
Not me
Silent Quiet. Empty.
That is my life now
I have my books and artifacts that I have collected
I have various gifts I've received over the years
I have myself
Most of myself
But not what matters
I sit in my apartment
The world moves on outside
In here silence engulfs everything
Nothing much has changed
Everything has changed
Silent. Quiet. Empty.
I removed the bandage from my neck
The doctors told me I shouldn't for two weeks
I did anyway
It doesn't matter
Everyone knows what I did
No use in hiding it
I don't want to hide it
I'm not worthy of them
To be a part of that elite group
I don't deserve their support
their strength
their comfort
their love
them
Silent. Quiet. Empty.
Even though I tell myself it doesn't matter
It does
A small part of me is screaming out to try and make it all right
But I won't let me
It's better for them to work this out on their own
Without me
But I wish they knew why I did it
No
It doesn't matter
Gunn came
I didn't want him here
He needed help with something
I wouldn't
I just wanted to be selfish
Just once
Not be the solid rock that they turned to with their problems
Or the sensible leader who knows what to do
Or the translator who messes up
He said it was Fred
Fred
I helped him anyway
In spite of my self
Then that small screaming part of me weaved its way out
I told him to explain my side of the story
That it was the only reason I clung to life
I realized what I was doing
I stopped
I gave him the bottle
For Fred
I hope she'll be okay
I kicked myself after he left
I shouldn't have said that
It wasn't true
It was true
I tell myself to be quiet
It needs to be this way
Silent. Quiet. Empty.
They don't need me anymore
They can do it
I have faith
In them at least
Not in much else
I don't need anything where I'm going
I have lost all I had
Everything important
But
Did I every really have it?
I thought I did
Not I'm not sure
I'm so confused
Silent. Quiet. Empty.
My life is simple now
My life is complicated
My life is empty
My life...
What a joke
What is there to live for now?
How do I go on this way?
When do I leave?
Where do I go?
Why bother?
Who cares?
Not me
Silent Quiet. Empty.