"I still don't know what could be wrong with him" mutters Odin.

"He is in mourning." said Sif giving Odin a shock. He had not heard her come up.

"I suppose so." he mutters again, "he is just so different."

"He will come to his senses, just give him time."

Thor's pov

I just cant stand it. Why, why me? Why must I lose two of the people closes to my heart right after I find my father not dead? I must be strong. I find hope, then lose all light, how can I be strong?

How can I answer my questions with more questions? I have seen the world, fought monsters yet still without my brother, who isn't my brother but in my heart I know he is my brother, or my love, Jane, how will I be whole. I have seen people in Asgard who lost their loved ones, but I never truly knew how it felt. I thought "oh, they will get over it. There are more important matters, but if I had paid attention I would have seen the broken, lost, hurting, torn, shattered soul.

I would see the pain in their eyes, the pain that would never go away, the nightmares that haunt their living lives. The shadows they jump at the lost hope that is still there. The image they try to hold on to but always slips their grasps, the image of happier times. I have not experienced true lose because Jane is still out there somewhere, and I just know Loki is too. If he was gone for good I would have had no hope or the ghost of hope, but I feel it inside of me and it gives me strength, a flame that still needs nurturing but is there. If there is one thing I have decided on, it's a plan of action. I've decided to go into Loki's room. I'm going to try and find anything I can. He had said that there were other ways to get to and from Asgard. No one, not even the maids were allowed into his room, his own father and brother weren't allowed. Maybe he had evil plans or inventions there.

No, I must not think that, Loki only wanted to make father proud. He was young and foolish, like I had been. Love has changed me, I do not long for war, or a good enemy. Now war means deaths, deaths mean loses, I can not stand anymore loses, and enemies put loved ones in harms way, before I knew my loved ones could protect themselves, or I knew where they were but I don't have that knowledge anymore. If I knew that my brother was still out there and something happened to him, I… I don't think I could live with the guilt. So, trying to get rid of those thoughts, I thought of Jane. That was a mistake. I started to think of all things that could go wrong.

I knew she was trying to find me. Her inventions could easily back fire or worse, work. She could end up in the frost giants land. I don't know what I would do about that. I slowly start towards his room. I don't know why but he chose the room on the other side of the castle. His door is pure diamond, then golden detail behind. My door is pure diamond, then a steel detail behind. It is so strong my hammer cannot break through, that's good because I use the first room for training. I have broken so many things in that room, my father took anything that could be broken, crushed, smashed, or destroyed out of the room. His has a magic sensor so only he could pass, but I accidentally smashed that awhile ago. No one ever got to fixing it, manly because of the storm Loki's magic created when he saw it. Everyone was on clean up duty because Loki wouldn't fix anything he was so mad.

Even without the sensor, no one dared go near his room if they could avoid it. Now I will have been the only other person to have gone into his room. Almost to the door. I don't know why I don't just go in. Maybe I'm scared of what is in there. I open his door and walk in. this first room gave me a schock, at first I thought the room was covered in blood. After a while of standing there like a moron, I relized that the room was red. A pure red everywhere. Everything is red. The next room is orangthe , the next yellow, and so on. The very last room is clear. Everything looks as if made of air, yet seeable. Through out all the chambers it is cold. So very cold.

Then suddenly I see two doors made of stone and have only a sheet covering one and another covering the other one. One is black, the other white. I hesitated there for a moment. Then i went through the black door. Behind the black one there are millions of millions of other doors, all with a sign over them. At the front there are all the firsts, first birthday, first travel, first use of magic and so on. At the end doors are being built magically. I knew he was alive! I start to search for a couple of weeks ago when the frost giants came.

Finally I find it. I'm so shocked, he disguised frost giants. and it was all so i would start a fight. curse my youth and stupidity. I decided to check out the other room. I leave the room of doors, and go into the one covered in white. The room is completely white, and bare. The only thing in here is a note.

I start to read it, " If some one is reading this, I have either allowed them into my room, is dead or gone. You must be wondering why the rooms are colored the way they are, it is a system of enhancing abilities, strength, all five senses, and even magic. Power flows through a rainbow, all the energy builds up at the ends, black and white, more power surges through white and black to form clear. That is why there is a bed in every room.

As the power flows magic takes me along with it until I awaken in the clear room. I normally stay in my room till every one else is fully awake so they won't notice that even at first dawn I am as fully awake as in the noon. If the rooms weren't patterned as so magic would try to pull me along but would get lost and I would awaken truly exhausted as if I just ran every square inch of Asgard. The black room holds less power than clear but more power than white. That is why I have my memories there, so even if I travel far and wide my memories will still be built as I live them.

The white room I have left blank for white corresponds with love, so as I must leave it blank until one single person takes over my heart, one person I would do anything for, that I would die inside if apart. When this room vanishes, the white cloth will turn to marble, it means my heart has broken or I died, but not until people know my secrets.

Once this room fades, it means I have shared my secrets or someone has read this note. It explains everything you need to know. If you are not sure go to the black room and watch the doors being built. If they stop after the one they were working on is done, I have either died or my magic has been taken. The most likely choice for the white room is the first, for it is near impossible to soften my heart. The only people close to me are my brother, father and mother…".

I couldn't bear to read any more. I silently left the room. It did not vanish. My brother is alive. At least for now.