This is just a oneshot on one of my favorite pairings in this fandom. It is a Buffy/Faith.
I don't own Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Buffy doesn't see it at first. She doesn't see that her jealousy is misplaced, when she watches Faith speak to a potential boyfriend, when she sees Faith talking to her friends. She doesn't see it later, when that jealousy is replaced by worry.
She doesn't see it when the fierce protectiveness overwhelms her. It overwhelms her when she sees Faith's fear. When the vampire with the talons comes looking for Faith, when Faith admits what this vamp did to her watcher.
She doesn't see the look on Faith's face when she talks about Scott, when she tells the other girl that she likes him. Faith talks about sex and tells her that men are beasts down deep and Buffy misses the look on her face as she says it.
She doesn't see it when she starts blowing Scott off for a night of patrolling with Faith. And then Angel comes back and she's so consumed in him and in her denial...
She doesn't see how different it is with Angel. She still loves him, she knows that but there's something different. Something wrong there that she can't place and it isn't long before she starts blowing Angel off too, for her.
Then there's guilt, when her friends find out about Angel and she's surprised the guilt only heightens when Faith is there too. It's sharp and uncomfortable and she's aware that she may have destroyed what little trust Faith had in her. She hates that feeling more than anything. Giles, Xander, and Willow will forgive her. She knows that. She isn't so sure she and Faith will be the same.
The mess with Gwendolyn Post only strengthens those beliefs. Faith looks destroyed, sitting on her bed with bruises on her face. Buffy tells her she's on Faith's side. She means it when she says it but she can see that Faith can't quite believe her. That's what she needs, more than anything. She needs Faith to believe her. She needs it more than she'd needed Angel to be okay.
All this, it should have made her see but it doesn't. It's Spike...Spike who lays it out for her.
They're in the magic shop when it happens, when Spike manages to make her world tilt. Faith had gone by her house earlier, just in time to rip Spike away from Buffy's mom. He'd revealed that he had kidnapped Xander and Willow and now here they were. Buffy, Faith, and one of Buffy's biggest enemies looking for some ingredient for some stupid spell so she could get her friends back.
Faith has wondered into another part of the store and she and Spike are alone and, of course, they get into a fight. Not the fists flying kind of fight, more of the taunting insults kind of fight. Buffy calls him pathetic for pining after Drusilla and he counters and succeeds in turning her world upside down.
"You're one to talk. I saw you...makin' eyes at the girl." Spike's voice is all knowing and smug and Buffy really does want to punch him.
"What are you talking about?" She doesn't give to much heed to his words. At least, not at first.
Spike tilts his head in the direction that Faith had walked off to. "Didn' know you liked swingin' the for the other side, slayer."
Buffy's mouth drops open and for a moment she can't think of a response to that. "I...I don't know what you're talking about," she insists but she can't help looking in that direction. Faith has disappeared in the back of the shop.
"You two, makin' googley eyes at each other," Spike clarified.
"I..." Buffy shakes her head and then stops. "She was looking at me like that?" She can't help herself from asking.
"You love the girl," Spike says. He's still looking through the shelves as he says it.
"You don't know what you're talking about." Buffy shakes herself, shakes the thoughts his words have provoked away.
"Right. You're just friends."
"Right," Buffy says firmly. Her next words are said softly, more to herself than Spike. "I can't believe I'm listening to this. Hello, vampire."
She catches the way that Spike's eyes flash in anger and his next words are born out of that anger. "You're not friends." He sees it in the way that the two of them look at each other. The dark haired girl will never accept it, not the friends thing anyway. He'd seen that before too. "You'll never be friends. You'll be in love until it kills you both. You'll fight and you'll shag and you'll hate each other until it makes you quiver but you'll never be friends. Love isn't brains, it's blood. Blood screaming inside of you to work its will."
The speech is all dramatic and probably not exactly true for the two girls just yet but the slayer takes a step way from him and he can see that he's both shocked and confused her. She's speechless and he smiles after a moment.
"I may be loves bitch but at least I'm man enough to admit it."
Then he goes back to looking for the ingredients he needs.
"Everything good, B?" Faith calls, walking back towards them.
"Yeah..." Buffy answers distractedly. It's Spike after all. What does he know?
After, that's what she thinks and she does something that she's become quite good at. She denies. She does it even though everything is different. Even though she sees it now, because of Spike. Even though her view of Faith is colored completely different.
She thinks maybe she'll be doing it forever.