A/N So I was listening to this song, Three Wooden Crosses by Randy Travis, and I just really wanted to write this fanfiction. It took me quite awhile to write and I'm pretty proud of it, so I hope you enjoy! :)
I don't own Glee or this song, both are too fabulous!
**So I posted this at a weird time, so I'm reposting it right now plus I made a few changes**
Rachel Berry used to have everything. She was beautiful, had a gorgeous voice, heck she even had a fan club at some point, goes to show how fast things can fall. The ex broadway star stood, wrapped in a towel, watching the brown tinted water fall from her motel shower. Her life went from bad to worse, with no sign of getting better. Just a month ago, she found out she was pregnant, and apparently pretty far along because it was beginning to be obvious that she had a thing growing in her, which killed business.
She sighed, dropped the towel and stepped in. Whenever you hopped places, from motel to motel, you learn that showers are best kept short, or whatever makes the water the weird brown color will leave residue on your skin that won't go away until you bath in clear water. With this in mind, she was in and out within 5 minutes.
Wrapped in the same towel, she left the bathroom and stared at her wardrobe. It consisted of cheap, revealing dresses that were just long enough to cover up what was needed too. She closed her eyes and grabbed blindly, taking out a dress that was skin tight and silvery. It would either push back her unflattering baby bump, or expose it even more. She hoped for the first option, and slid it on over her lacy undergarments. She looked in the mirror and was glad to see that it had reduced the size of her baby bump.
Her face was horrendous. Years of being an alcoholic and a methamphetamine addict had made her look like she was 52 instead of 37 and took away her wonderful singing. She applied foundation to her entire face and layered on blush, eyeshadow, eyeliner, lipstick, and mascara until she looked like a 35 year old with WAY too much make up on.
She teased up her hair and applied a plethora of products until she was satisfied with her appearance. She might have lost her natural looks, but she was a master with the blush brush and had a great figure. (aside from the protruding bump in her torso) She picked up a bottle of cheap perfume and layered it on until she could barely breathe.
"Okay, just another day. Don't be nervous Rachel, you've done this for years." and with that, she stepped into the night, which was when she got the most business.
It must of been near midnight, and she went to her usual corner, where men usually line up to get some time with her. She was there not 30 seconds when a blue Toyota truck pulled up, a guy with a creepy mustache and aviator glasses opened the door for her. She sighed and walked in, he flashed her a yellow grin with missing teeth.
"How much for everything?" he asked, grinning wildly.
"Fifty dollars. You pay for the room." she said, feeling nauseous.
"Works for me!" exclaimed the man, whose name she still didn't know. She sat awkwardly, trying to pull down the hem of her dress, and the creepy man put his hand on her exposed thigh.
"Leave it." he growled, his smile now gone. She let her hands fall to her sides and sat board straight, nervous, even though she had been doing this every day for 2 years now.
"I-I can't do this. I'm sorry."she said, once they were stopped at a stop sign. She slid out, while the man yelled at her to come back. Once she was almost out of yelling distance, she heard him call her a whore, and then she heard no more yelling, maybe because she had begun sobbing uncontrollably.
Rachel Berry wanted a new life. She was done with this choice, she was ready to leave. She walked around, multiple cars pulling up, making her feel even worse, until she found a Greyhound bus station. She bought a ticket that took her from... wherever she was currently and up to Colorado. She decided then that she would go, get a job, and go to community college. She needed a new life.
The bus would leave at midnight, and it was currently 11:30. She sat on the bench that was outside of the office, clutching her ticket as if it was her ticket to heaven. She was alone for only a few moments, when a man clutching a bible came and sat next to her. She glanced at him, then was baffled.
"Finn?" she asked, her painted eyes bulging, her mascara streaked face reddening.
"How.. how do you know my name? I've never... I would never..." he said, clearing his throat awkwardly.
"I'm Rachel." she choked, her voice rough from crying and years of smoking. "R-Rachel
Berry. I-I thought I would never see you again... I wish you'd never have to see me again..."
"Rachel? What? No. You look nothing like the Rachel I knew. The broadway star Rachel that I was so proud of and inspired by? You're lying." he said, looking a bit taken back.
"No. No I'm not... I-I inspired you?" she burst into tears again. "I-I'm so sorry. I'm just... Trying to fix everything... I really hate my life... And the fact that I've let you down... I'll never forget how much you believed in me, even after we broke up... I'm so sorry, Finn. I'm sorry." Rachel said this really fast, whispering the last "I'm sorry."
"How did you get like this? I mean, everyone was surprised when you went off the charts for 2 years, but... Nobody would've guessed this. What happened?"
"I was with an abusive boyfriend. He made me feel like crap, told me I was a terrible actress and singer, it got to my self esteem, so I started to drink. Then I got in the wrong group, got into meth. Nobody wants to hire you when you have meth sores all over your face, so I resulted to... This." she gestured to her skin tight dress and wiped a tear away. "I really didn't want anyone I knew to see me like this but... This is me..."
"But you're trying to fix it. That's whats important." he said, grinning at her a bit. She smiled back, then sniffed and wiped away a tear.
"Well, I hope it works. What happened with you?" she asked.
"Well, I found god. Well, again." he said, chuckling while remembering "Grilled Cheesus" "and, well, I followed it. I just divorced my wife, and now I'm trying to start new, like you." he said, smiling a bit and nudging her.
"Yeah, but your a preacher, I'm a hooker. We are nothing alike, Finn."
"You never know..." he grinned at her. She couldn't help but smile back.
The bus pulled up, and they got on together, her with nothing, and Finn with only a bible. The bus already had two others on it, but Rachel didn't notice at first. She was too busy staring at the bus driver. He had a long curly hair that formed something of a afro, and amazing hazel eyes. He looked like he needed a shave that day, but other than that he didn't look like the filth you usually see driving Greyhound buses. His name tag said "Blaine Anderson"
Rachel elbowed Finn and whispered to him "That's Kurt's old boyfriend, Blaine. The one I kissed. Remember?" Finn looked at the man, then back at Rachel and gasped.
"Blaine! How the heck are you? How's Kurt? Man, it's been forever since I saw either of you." Blaine looked up from his book, and smiled.
"Finn! We're doing well. We actually live in Colorado, so I'm just dropping everyone off then going home, and earning a buck at the same time." he said, smiling genuinely. "Uhm.. Whose she? She looks like a hooker" he whispered.
"This is Rachel Berry. Remember, y'all kissed that one time? Yeah. This is Rachel..." he said, gesturing to Blaine. He looked at her blankly while she waved awkwardly, and pulled down her dress.
"Woah. Rachel... Uhm. Hi! I.. I loved your shows. Uhm.. Would you like my jacket?" he asked, noticing her awkward air. She nodded and he tossed a jacket she just knew Kurt had bought for him. It was Gucci.
"Thanks... It was nice seeing you." she said uncomfortably showing him her ticket and moving to the back of the bus. Two high school friends in half an hour? She was just about to die of embarrassment, when she realized who was on the ride with them. She whispered to Finn "Please don't tell them it's me. I'm embarrassed enough as it is..."
"No problem." he mumbled, winking at her. Finn exclaimed "Puck?" whenever they were in full view of the other two passengers.
"Wait... Finn? Woah. Long time no see! Small world, eh?" Puck said, smiling. He was wearing a wide brimmed hat, flannel shirt, and tight jeans. His skin was tanned and his arms muscular.
The other passenger dropped the pencil that she had been chewing on while looking at a stack of paper. She had a button up top on, and a long skirt. Her skin was caramel, and she had her long black hair pulled into a professional pony tail. "Finn? Puck? It's Santana! What the fuck is going on?" she asked, loosing her business like aura.
"And the driver is Kurt's old boyfriend Blaine, remember him?"
"What? No. Way. High school reunion!" she said with a grin.
Finn and Rachel went and sat down next to each other, Rachel getting the window seat. Puck moved so he was sitting directly across the aisle from them, and Santana sat next to him. They leaned toward each other as if they were teenagers on a school bus.
"Erm, whose she?" asked Puck, looking at Rachel apprehensively.
"Oh! This is Rach-quel..." he said, grinning and laughing nervously.
"Well, hello Rachquel!" said Puck, extending an arm across Finn. She shook his hand then sat back and sighed.
"So, what have you guys been up to since McKinley?" asked Finn, smiling at all of them.
"I became a teacher. I'm actually on my way to teach at a school for the mentally handicapped in Denver." said Santana, looking proud of herself. "I'm married with four kids who are going to be flying to Denver later to come with me." she said, smiling.
"Well, I decided to go into agriculture. I have a pretty big farm, a wife, and kids." he said, getting out his wallet. He pointed to a picture with a teenage boy with eye length hair, a pale little girl with short brown hair, and a girl, who must have been his wife, with a warm smile and blond hair, pulled back into a bun. "This is my wife Stacey, my son Adam, and my daughter Rachel." he said, blushing a bit. "Stacey doesn't know I picked that name because of Rachel Berry. Remember her? I wonder how she's doing..." he trailed off. "What have you been up to?"
"Well, I married Quinn. She was a stay at home mom, I was a preacher and worked with programming for google. It... didn't work out." he said, feeling uncomfortable.
"Oh. Well, I'm sorry Finn.." said Puck awkwardly.
Finn cleared his throat. "Well, I'm glad you guys are doing well." he smiled, lines crinkling next to his eyes. Rachel was curled up under Blaine's jacket in the seat next to Finn, hiding her face. "And where are you headed, Puck?"
"Oh, I'll be getting off in Denver then I'm catching another bus to Wyoming, where I live with my beautiful family." said Puckerman, grinning.
"Well, it definitely was nice to see you guys." said Finn, turning to Rachel. "Are you okay?" he asked. She was curled in the jacket and shaking.
"Y-yes. I just can't believe he named his kid after me..." she whispered so Puck wouldn't hear her. "I am just so ashamed of the people I'm hurting without me, or them, knowing. I want so bad to thank him."
Finn suddenly said "So, Finn, why'd you name your kid after Rachel?" he asked.
"Well, between me and you, I never really got over her. I mean, now I am but when we had her... Gosh, she was just so perfect and beautiful and reminded me of Rachel, I just had too, especially after all of her success." he said, grinning. Rachel gave an audible sob, and Puck looked at her. "Uhm, is she okay?"
"Yeah, she's just a bit overwhelmed. But, I'm sure Rachel is honored that you named your daughter after her, even if she doesn't know it." he said, nudging Rachel a bit.
"I sure hope so, since the wifey still doesn't know." he chuckled nervously, scratching the back of his head.
"How did you hide that from her for so long?" asked Finn.
"Said it was my beloved grandma's name," he said "I know, it's insensitive, but she really can't know or she'll flip. So..."
Finn chuckled. "Yeah, I know what you mean." then bent down and whispered to Rachel, "Did I do okay?" she uncovered her head and smiled at him.
She shifted the jacket so she was now using it as a jacket instead of a blanket and sat up. Her mascara was running and her face was blotchy. She was beginning to feel nauseous, she instinctively clutched her stomach. She could feel her last meal struggling up her throat.
"I gotta go to the bathroom." she grunted to Finn, then ran up to the on bus bathroom. To a civilized person, it'd be called filthy, but she was so used to motel bathrooms it didn't bother her one bit to have her face so close to this one. She held her hair back and emptied her stomach, retching until there was nothing left. She sat up, wiped her mouth off, and came back out.
She plastered on a fake smile and aimed it at Finn. He arched an eyebrow. She rested her hand on her stomach again.
She sat down, and he leaned next to her and whispered "Do you know who the father is?" and put his hand over hers on her midriff. She bit her lip and shook her head, her eyes filling with tears again. She leaned into him and he wrapped his arms around her.
"It could be anybody. I don't know." she sighed. He kept his hand resting on her stomach, receiving weird looks from their old buddies.
Finn had begun reading from his bible, with Rachel reading along with him. Soon she realized how comfortable he was, and began snoring against him.
Finn didn't want to move Rachel, so he let her snore against him, stroking her head. Puck and Santana were catching up, but he couldn't hear anything. He was lost in his own thoughts, thinking of the past, in high school when he had dated the girl who was asleep on him. But he chose Quinn. Why? Why did he choose the blond heiress he was attracted to, instead of the girl he was in love with? It was the biggest, most regretted decision he'd ever had.
Quinn had been popular. She had a reputation for being a bit slutty, considering she had a baby during high school. Finn didn't want too, but she made him. She seduced him and convinced him it would be okay, but of course it wasn't. Quinn got pregnant. Again. But with his baby. And thus the train-wreck marriage began.
They had two more children, hoping it would somehow save their marriage. They were very wrong. The children had just increased their stress, no matter how much they loved them. Now their divorce was just hurting more people, and it killed Finn. He had to get away.
The bus hit a particularly wide pot hole, causing Finn to leave his own thoughts, and Rachel awaken. She sat up groggily and rubbed her eyes, smearing her make up even more. She yawned and laid her head on his shoulder.
"How long was I asleep?" she asked. She still had Blaine's jacket on.
"Only about half an hour. We're nowhere near Colorado. You should go back to sleep." he said, putting an arm around her shoulders.
"Nah," she said, pushing his arm off and stretching out her arms. "I'll stay up. We still have a lot of catching up to do." she smiled at him. "So, what happened with you and Quinn?" his face fell.
"Well, long story..." he said, squirming a bit.
"We have time." she said, grinning at him.
He sighed, grinning a bit too. He told her everything that had happened after high school. How often she cheated on him, how he tried too make it work, prayed and prayed about it, but nothing could fix their marriage. How they'd plaster on smiles and pretend they were happy for their kids and church goers, and kept arguments in their bedroom. Finn was done with the arguing and Quinn had gotten pregnant with another mans baby, so he dropped his morals and left. Rachel hugged him around the shoulders.
He saw it first. She had her eyes closed, so she didn't see the blinding lights of the semi that was going directly to the bus. Finn pushed Rachel back and laid across her, hoping that it would save her. He had just heard her gasp, when he felt the impact.
Rachel didn't know what was going on until it happened. She felt Finn fall in her lap, then saw the opposite side of the bus cave in. It hit Finn directly, shielding her from most of the impact.
She yelled Finn's name and did her best so that he was facing up to her. He said "Cant you see the promise land?" then laid his bible in her hands. She was sobbing his name and shaking. She bent down and kissed him, asking him to not leave her. He grinned, put his cut hand on her cheek, then he was gone. Any sort of light that was in his eyes was gone, and she knew he was gone. She started sobbing loudly.
The window next to her was suddenly opened. A long pair of strong arms came down and caught her under the arms. She scrambled to grab the bible, then let herself be picked up.
Once she was on her feet and out of the bus, she ran into her saviour. She sobbed into Blaine Anderson's shirt.
"A-are the others... Dead?" she whispered.
"Rachel, we both need to get to a hospital." Blaine said. They both put an arm on each others shoulders, then limped to behind the bus where a line of cars was and people begun to get out of their cars. Somewhere in the throng of cars, a police car, fire truck, and ambulance materialised. They made it to where Blaine and Rachel were standing and loaded them into the truck, then Rachel blacked out.
Rachel and Blaine both made it out with barely a scratch. Rachel miraculously hadn't lost the baby. They stayed in the hospital the next day, until Kurt could hop on a flight to meet them there. They waited anxiously, wanting as soon as possible to leave. Especially Rachel, who couldn't stand being so near to where it happened.
"Hey, Rachel?" said Blaine, the day after the accident. "I-I'm sorry. This is all my fault. If I had seen that stop sign, we wouldn't be here, Finn would be alive, and ugh. I just feel so terrible."
"Blaine. You saved me. I am so grateful. Don't even apologize." she said, glowering at him. The door swung open, and Kurt Hummel came bustling in with a dozen balloons. He set them down next to Blaine's bed.
"Blaine," he whispered "I was so worried about you..." Kurt's eyes filled with tears and he laid his head on his chest. Blaine rubbed his back.
"Kurt, we're okay. It's okay." Blaine murmured. Kurt sat up, then suddenly kissed Blaine passionately. Blaine had his eyes opened in alarm at first, but then closed them and kissed him back. The couple was tangled up, when Rachel decided they needed to be reminded she was there. She cleared her throat once, twice, three times until she was nearly coughing. The two untangled themselves, and looked up at Rachel, red in the face.
"Oh. Uhm, hey Rachel." said Kurt, his lips swollen. He scratched the back of his head awkwardly, and Blaine chuckled.
"Sorry about that, Rachel. You know how it is. We've been apart for almost two weeks, and this whole ordeal..." he sighed and grabbed Kurt's hand, looking up at him with longing.
"It's understandable. But still just a bit awkward." she chuckled and winked at Kurt, who smiled back.
"Rachel. It's been so long. How are you doing?" said Kurt, who let go of Blaine's hand and made his way to her bed.
"You know, I've been better..." she trailed off. She tried to not let her thoughts wander to what had happened a few nights before, although they always managed to get back in her head.
Kurt nodded. He put a hand on her head and bent down and kissed her on the cheek. "Blaine told me everything that happened over the phone. I'm sorry Rachel. Come home with us. We'll give you a place to live."
Rachel smiled, trying to not cry. "O-okay. That means a lot. Thanks so much Kurt." she said with a smile.
~40 years later~
Rachel Berry Anderson was sitting next to her husband and her best friends, Blaine Anderson and Kurt Hummel. It was a common occurrence to see them sitting in the front pew on Sundays, watching the preacher that they all knew and cared about deeply. Rachel had gone from the life of a hooker, to having two of the most fabulous friends, and an amazing husband.
After the night that changed her life, she moved in with Kurt, Blaine, and Blaine's brother, Johnathon. She lived there for over a year, when her and Jonathon began dating. The relationship bloomed quickly, and soon they were married with their own place, where they raised Rachel's son, Finn.
Rachel thought of all this while her son told the congregation about that night. She had told him this story so many times, and it brought her to tears every time she heard it. She pictured the events in her head, having lived it herself. Then he finally got to the bible that changed her life.
He held up the bible Finn had given her and said "Bless the farmer, and the teacher, and the preacher who gave this too my momma, who read it to me." he looked directly at her and smiled, also teary eyed himself.
Jonathon patted her in the shoulder, and she smiled at him. Her son finished up his talk, and said "Remember, it's not what you take when you leave this world behind you, it's what you leave behind you when you're gone."
A/N I really hope you enjoyed. I really loved writing this, and I wanted to do the song justice because it's just an amazing song. Reviews are loved :)