I lay there hugging on to my pillow. The top of the cover was soaking wet, it was covered with my tears. I think spent the whole night crying, my eyes hurt from all the crying. After crying so much I just didn't know what to do so I got up to go to the bathroom. I was too afraid to see my face, it was probably puffy and red. I turned the light on and decided to not look at the mirror. Why did this happen to me all the time. Instead of sitting on the floor holding my face into my arms I turned the tap on and splashed some water on my face. Just after that I dried it off with a towel. Long after taking in the water on face I brought my aching sore body to bed once again. It felt numb all over. The lashes the scars, why Alois why. He hurt the people I love, and I feel so alone. Alois took away the only thing that mattered to me…. Uh it hurts too much to even think about him. Sebastian I just wish you were here next to me. I know you're alive, you have to be I can still feel your presence.

I know that … ahhh it hurts to much. Just go to sleep Ciel why ah just go to sleep. I'm just so alone Mey rin, Finnie and Bard, all dead h h how is that even possible. Ack uhhh noo not again. it started to come so out of my mouth, the puke the vomit the pain. All rushing out of me. Why me? Alois I want to uhhh….Ack the pain I can't hold it in any more. It's so much t handle. The memories there flooding back into my brain *flash back* come back here Ciel I am going to get you, no you won't Sebby I'm too fast, but boy was I wrong he ran past me and grabbed me and picked me up and threw me on the grass. Ht then collapsed right next to me being pulled down into the the grown falling away from me. NOOOOO SEBASTIAN COME BACK! I shot my head up from the bed and stood up screaming.

Somewhere in London

Hmm what shall we do to you next Sebastian. Bwak ahhhhh it hurts Alois stop it. The pain I can't tolerate it any longer. I just want to see my Ciel my dear sweet Ciel. He was so heartbroken when his parents left I can't even imagine what he's going through now without me.

Shut up Sebastian you filthy piece of shit. Ciel doesn't care about you, and he never will. He is sitting at home being grateful to me that you are gone.

SHUT UP ALOIS. YOU ARE LYING! CIEL CARES ABOUT ME AND YOU KNOW IT.

You can keep telling yourself that Sebastian but we all know that I am right, don't you agree Claude. Yes your highness.

I saw the cold icy blue eyes that Alois had. I just knew that he was lying he had to be. Me and Ciel had been through too much together. Alois walked over closer to me with a whip in his hands. I was tied up against the wall so I was afraid for what was about to happen next. He raised his right hand and the whip flew backwards. He then whipped it forward with full force. Ahhhhh I screamed with agonizing pain. Just look at you Sebastian why would anyone care about you, you filthy creature.

Normal pov

Alois just turned around and walked away with Claude beside him. Sebastian just stood there pain rushing through his body. He didn't know how many times he was lashed, it hurt too much to remember.