Authors Note: This is my first story I hope you like it, and if you don't I KILL YOU... just kidding, but seriously, read it or die...
Disclaimer: I don't own dot hack, I only own my own characters. (sorry for so many "owns")
.Dot Hack/ AFTER HOURS
"Annnnnd, CUT!" said the director of .hack.
"FINNALLY! Im tired of doing that stupid anime pose for like, five minutes!" Black Rose said.
"Ya, really, thats getting old, who writes this stuff anyways?" Mistral said with a grumpy face.
Then, all of a sudden, a ninja star stabs the director on the side of his head!
"OH MY GOD!" Black Rose and Mistral screeched.
"You two should be proud that he's dead!" Some guy said, standing in the window. above them.
"BUT WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO FOR A LIVING? COLLECT BEER CANS FROM OUTSIDE OF OLD BARS?" Mistral screamed with her eyes on fire.
"Um..." the mystery guy said blankly.
"WHAT!" Mistral yelled abonoxiously.
"You're eyes are still on fire." He said.
Mistral starts to run in circles then eventually jumps out another window.
"Hey, Rude Ass, you still haven't told us your name." Black Rose said annoyinglly.
"Huh...what.?" the guy said and looks around. "Oh...right...it Reyzono, R-E-Y-Z-O-N-O, Reyzono.
"O.K. we're not at the spelling bee!" Black Rose said.
"..." Reyzono sighed.
"MMMMMM...Banana" DK from out of no where said.
Reyzono and Black Rose just stare at the mentally retarded monkey.
"Lets just shoot him and get on with our lives." Reyzono said in a peaceful way..
Mistral jumps back in the room and eats DK's arm because hes just a miserable monkey.
"Uh...well at least hes out of our lives." Reyzono said as he kicks the limp body of the dumbass monkey.
"Well my friends, Konton ,Reckie, Kanamari, and I are taking care of jobless anime characters."
"THAT'S..." Black Rose stopped for a second..."GENIUS!"
Then, at random, FredFredBurger comes crashing though the roof on Mistral..
"I like nachos and frozen yogert, YES!" F.F.B. yelled out loud.
"You know what I like?" Mistral said.
"YES!" he said.
"What?"
"YES!"
"UGGGGGH!" Mistral rips out some of her hair.
Reyzono got so tired of everyone ignoring him,so he grabs Mistral and Black Rose by the ear and drags them to his house.
"Owowowowowowowowow..." the girls whined on the way to his house.
"I gots two more!" Reyzono said cheerfully.
"Omigod, Its Black Rose!" Rena screamed like all fan girls do.
"Ya, you gotta problem with that!" Black Rose yelled.
"Well., SOOOOORRRRYY!" Rena yelled back.
"Oh, You wanna go!"
"Bring it on!"
Black Rose tackles Rena out the window!
Rena kicks Black Rose off her and tackles her in the air!
Then the both fall down a hole, still beating the shit out each other!
"Why are they fighting?" Reyzono asked then took a picture of them.
"No clue, but lets go down there and check it out, it looks sexy." Kanamari said with excitment.
Reyzono and Kanamari got their cameras and video cameras and somehow got in the hole..
Then, all of a suddeen, Rena's chest plate is in Reyzono's face!
"AAAAAAAAHHH, Im BLIND!" Reyzono yelled running into the holes wall.
Kanamari took a picture for the heck of it.
"Looks good on ya!' Kanamari said laughing.
"Ohhhh, they should be shredding each others clothes off!" Reyzono said outloud.
Black Rose and Rena glare at Reyzono as he backs away slowly.
"Backing...backing...backing...running...RUNNING!" Reyzono said as he began to run away.
Rena grabs his neck and throws him to a high school.
"OOOOOOOOHHH MMMMYYYY GOOOOOOODDDDD!" Reyzono yelled as he flew threw the air.
Reyzono crashes threw the ceiling of the girls locker room.
"Ummmm...this is EXACTLY what it looks like..." Reyzono sighed.
The girls just stared at him for a brief moment.
"GEEEEEEEET HIM!" they all screeched.
"Just my luck..." Reyzono sighed in fetal position.
They grabbed him, spinned him around and threw him at mach 5!
In Japan at night...
"Look mommy! A shooting star!" said a little boy.
"What did i say about being stupid?" yelled the mother. "No more bathroom privelages for you, young man!'
"But I gotta go noooow!"
"Do you wanna lose your breathing privelages, too?"
"No, but I gotta GO!"
"TOUGH! Dont make me call Satan!"
"Ok mommy..."
-Chapter 1 end-