Disclaimers: The characters in this story are copyrighted by Warner Brothers and Shoot The Moon Productions. I make no money from these characters; I simply like to share their world for a short time.
A/N Just a typical day in the King/Stetson household; don't want to give too much away. A sequel, of sorts, to BOYS WILL BE BOYS. (Inspired by a real-life event starring my then 17-year-old daughter.) Hope you enjoy! A special thanks to Bruce Boxleitner and Kate Jackson—as well as the rest of the cast—for portraying these characters so wonderfully.
Welcome to a typical chaotic morning at 4247 Maplewood, thought Lee to himself. Maybe not quite typical, as Dotty usually performed the kitchen duties while he and Amanda got ready for work. But since she was off visiting her sister Lillian, it was up to Chef Lee. Well . . . Amanda had measured everything out for the pancake batter the night before. All he had to do was preheat the griddle, stir the wet and dry ingredients together, pour, and flip. Oh . . . and make sure he didn't burn the bacon!
Every time he put on an apron, he couldn't help but think of Barney. Without his taking little Lee under his wing, 6'2" Lee wouldn't have a clue how to feed himself, yet alone his hungry family. And with two teenage boys and a pregnant wife about to descend on the breakfast nook, he realized he had better get moving.
Just as Amanda was ready to start downstairs to help her handsome husband, their little bundle of joy decided to announce his or her presence by sending her running back into the master bath with yet another wave of morning sickness.
"Don't worry, Mom," yelled Phillip as he saw his mother making her mad dash. "We'll tell Lee you'll be down as soon as you're finished puking your guts out."
"Yeah . . . I doubt he's expecting you anytime soon. This is the fifth day in a row. Are you sure you're okay?" questioned a concerned Jaime.
"I'm sure; my morning sickness was actually worse with each of you," chuckled Amanda as she flushed and reached for her toothbrush. She just hoped this child soon settled down . . . unlikely, considering its father, she thought as she shook her head with a smile.
The boys were already digging into their pancakes and bacon when she finally reached the kitchen and gave her husband a quick kiss. "I'll take over from here, Sweetheart. You need to head upstairs and get dressed. Billy's expecting us on time for the 8 a.m. staff meeting, and it's already 7:15. Besides, I don't think I'm going to be able to eat much . . . maybe just a slice or two of toast and some milk."
Quickly stealing another quick kiss, he headed up the stairs two at a time.
"Boys, you have exactly two minutes before the school bus pulls up. Let's move," admonished Amanda.
The boys quickly shoved the remains of their breakfast in their mouths, followed by the last few swallows of their orange juice. Quickly placing their dirty dishes in the sink, they both gave her a peck on the cheek before grabbing their backpacks and heading out the front door.
"Don't slam . . . " BANG " . . . the door." Amanda sighed; at least they weren't going to miss their bus. Now to get the dishes rinsed and loaded into the dishwasher before her husband reappeared.
Five minutes later saw the 'Vette pulling out of the drive and into the increasingly frustrating rush-hour traffic. With a little luck, they might make that 8 a.m. staff meeting with a few minutes to spare.
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"All right, people . . . let's get busy," Billy dismissed the meeting. "Lee, Amanda . . . I need to see you both in my office please."
"What's up, Billy," Lee questioned as he and his wife entered their boss's private office. He had been hoping to escape with Amanda to the relative sanctuary of the Q Bureau for a few minutes of peace and quiet. But if Billy had something for them, well . . . who was he to argue.
"We just got word that Augie wants to see the two of you ASAP . . . something about rumors of a plot to kidnap someone connected to the agency. I need you to check it out and report back to me within the hour."
"Ah, Billy! You know Augie; he always thinks he has valuable information for us. He just needs money, and he sees Amanda and me as his own private bank."
"Yeah, but you know you'll both feel guilty if something happens that could have been prevented," Billy reminded them with a knowing grin.
"Absolutely, Sir. We'll get right on it." Amanda grabbed Lee's tie and gently led him out of the office.
Once they had made it to the relative privacy of the elevator, Lee just shook his head. "You know what Augie's like, Amanda . . . "
"And you know what I told Billy is right!"
"I know . . . but I don't have to like it," he grumbled. He bent down to give her a quick kiss, telling her in his own way that she was forgiven. "Guess we might as well get this over with. Come on," he said, taking her hand as they exited the elevator.
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"Lee my man . . . and Mrs. Lee . . . what an unexpected surprise," Augie grinned as he stepped out of a limousine that looked like it belonged in a junk yard.
"Cut the crap, Augie. Mrs. Lee and I don't have the time, you know what I mean? You're the one that wanted to see us, remember? Now what do you have?"
Amanda placed a calming hand on her husband's arm. "What Lee means is that we were told you have some valuable information for us. We'd really appreciate your passing that information on so that we can get back to the office."
"Well, I did hear an interesting bit of news yesterday when I was driving one of my customers to his business meeting. Seems he's been having these bad cases of leg cramps. Been seeing an acupuncturist . . . no more cramps! Might work, but I just can't see myself letting someone stick needles in me though . . . "
"Augie," warned Lee.
"Oh . . . yeah . . . he also said rumor has it the Russians are looking to kidnap your boys, Lee. Hold them for ransom . . . or maybe a trade."
Amanda started to sway. Only Lee's quick reflexes prevented her from collapsing onto the hard ground.
As he gently steadied her, she looked up at him with tears in her eyes. "The boys! Lee, what are we going to do?"
Lee took his wallet out, giving Augie his usual fee, plus an extra $20. If the threat involved their boys, it was well worth it said a little voice in the back of his head. And to think he hadn't wanted to take this meet.
"If you have any more details, you had better spill them now!"
Augie gave him a confused look. "You offend me, Lee. Do you actually think I would withhold information—especially when it concerns your boys?" Despite his words, he had his hand out again, expecting an additional payment for the additional information.
"Au - gie!" Lee said, drawing out his name. He would have punched the man, but he was afraid to leave his wife's side.
"All right," Augie conceded. "He did say that it was supposed to take place early this morning. That's why I was so anxious to see you."
"Thank you," Amanda managed to choke out before she turned and headed for the 'Vette at breakneck speed. She was in and buckled up before Lee managed to get his door open.
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As they raced toward the boys' school, they reached for each other's hands across the car's console.
"You know the best thing we ever told the boys was that we were married, right?"
Amanda squeezed Lee's hand in agreement.
"Well the next best thing we told them was about our work at the Agency. We've briefed them on what to watch for and how to handle potentially dangerous situations. They'll be fine, Amanda!"
"I hope so," she managed to choke out through impending tears.
"Hey, hey . . . tears won't help anything. We need to keep our heads in the game."
"I know, Lee. It's just so hard."
Lee turned and gave his wife a weak smile. "I know," he whispered, more to himself than to his shaken wife.
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Once they reached the school, they raced to the office, hand-in-hand.
"Why hello, Mrs. King," the office secretary greeted Amanda. As she realized Amanda wasn't alone, she amended her greeting. "Sorry . . . Hello Mr. and Mrs. Stetson." Her face told the Stetsons how much she regretted the slip.
"No worries . . . we just need to get the boys and take them . . . " Amanda quickly realized that she couldn't just blurt out that they were in danger, as their school records stated that the they worked for IFF, a film company.
"Ah . . . their grandmother was just rushed to the hospital, and we need to take them there," Lee quickly covered for his wife.
"Oh, I'm very sorry to hear that. I just saw Dotty yesterday at the market, and she seemed just fine."
"Ah . . . it's actually their father's mother," Amanda lied. "She's been suffering with acute hypertension for years now. She seemed to have it under control, but the doctors are saying that any problems could lead to something much more serious, even . . . I don't want to say the words. You just never know; you never know . . . "
Lee decided it was time to stop the snowballing Amanda ramble, as they needed to see that the boys were safe as soon as possible. "Could you please just tell us what rooms they're in," Lee interjected.
"Let's see . . . Jaime is in math, room 12. Phillip is in science, room 28," she said as she consulted her master schedule.
"Thanks," Lee said as he flashed her one of his dimpled smiles. "If you could just sign them out to us, that would be great." He turned to Amanda. "Why don't you get Jaime since he's closer? I'll head down the hall and get Phillip."
With a quick nod of their heads, they set off down the main hall.
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When Jaime saw his mom at the door with a look of panic on her face, he quickly gathered his things. He didn't hear exactly what his mom said to the teacher, but he knew something was definitely not right.
"I'll explain later," his mom whispered as they headed back towards the office.
Lee, on the other hand, found that Phillip was missing from his science class. The teacher didn't know where he could be and insisted that he probably was absent.
"Look, lady, he's not absent. I'm his stepfather, and I saw him get on the bus this morning!"
"Well, Mr. . . . "
"Stetson"
"Well, Mr. Stetson, you do know that teenagers have a tendency to ditch school from time to time . . . even when their parents swear that they wouldn't do such a thing."
"Now listen here . . . " Lee quickly realized that this was getting him nowhere and was only serving to upset Phillip's teacher. "Never mind. Thank you."
Lee turned and practically raced down the hall. If Phillip wasn't in class, then where was he?
When he reached the office, Amanda's eyes pleaded with him as she voiced their concerns in a whisper. "Lee, what are we going to do?"
Stepping into the office, Lee questioned the secretary. "Sorry, but Phillip wasn't in room 28. Could there be anywhere else he might be?"
"There is a field trip to the Capitol building today. Perhaps he's with that group. Do you remember signing a permission slip?"
Not wanting to waste any more time, Lee responded. "That must be it. I bet my wife signed it and just forgot. With her ex mother-in-law being rushed to the hospital, it must have slipped her mind. Thank you."
"Amanda, did you sign a permission slip for a field trip to the Capitol today?" Lee asked his wife as he exited the office.
"No! Jaime, do you know anything about a field trip today?"
"Phillip mentioned it last week, but he said that he had forgotten to get one of you to sign the permission slip," offered Jaime. "What's wrong?"
His mother's face was one of worry, while his stepfather's was one of sheer determination. Now he knew what Lee's agent face looked like.
"I think we need to get to someplace secure," Lee said solemnly. "Let's go; we can talk about it in the car." Lee's eyes continued to sweep the area around him as he moved his wife and son to the car—his hand poised to reach for his gun at the first sign of trouble. If they had already grabbed Phillip, but not Jaime, they had to be somewhere near.
"Sweetheart, where are we going to go?"
"Right now—the Agency. That's where Jaime will be safest and where we will have the best resources."
Once they were in the privacy of the car, Jaime started to ask questions. "Mom, what's wrong? Why are we going to the Agency? And where is Phillip?"
Lee knew Amanda was too upset to answer, so he tried his best to respond. "Jaime, your mother and I received word this morning that someone was planning on kidnapping you and your brother, and they were planning on doing it today. You heard me tell your mother why we are headed to the Agency. As of now, we don't know who or what might be coming at us, and it's the safest place for everyone. As for Phillip . . . well . . . we don't know . . . and until we do . . ."
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Just as all three walked into Billy's office, Francine burst in. "Billy, I just got off the phone with Augie. Seems his information was all messed up. They weren't after your boys! They were after the Boy Scouts that toured the Russian Embassy yesterday. It seems they were given an outdated brochure on the Soviet Union, and the ambassador just wanted to make sure they had the most current info. I tell you . . . leave it to Augie to get things messed up." As she finished, she finally took in the scene in front of her. "Ah . . . I guess my information is a little late. Well . . . better safe than sorry, I always say."
"Can it, Francine. You're sure Augie's information is legit this time?" questioned the section chief.
"Yeah . . . he kept saying that Lee was going to kill him for giving false information . . . over and over and over. Lee . . . you might want to pay him a visit. I don't think he'll calm down until you do."
"Oh I'll pay him a visit all right . . . "
"Now Lee, Augie couldn't help it," Amanda said as she put a hand on Lee's arm to instantly calm him. But even as Lee calmed, she started tapping her foot. "I might just do more harm to him than you would."
Everyone left out a small chuckle at the thought of Amanda doing harm to anyone.
"But Mom . . . if the threat isn't real . . . where is Phillip?"
All heads turned to the youngest King boy. He was right . . . Just where was Phillip? The only place left to look was with the field trip to the Capitol.
"Sir, would it be possible to call security at the Capitol and have them check for him with his school group? That's the only logical place he might be . . . unless he did indeed ditch school."
"On it," Francine said over her shoulder as she hurried out to her desk.
Lee reached over to grasp Amanda's hand. Both just closed their eyes, trying to calm their nerves. Jaime walked over and gave both of them a hug. What if he wasn't with the field trip? After all, he could still be in trouble—although Jaime couldn't imagine anything more troubling than if he had actually skipped school. He'd be grounded for a year!
Billy decided to leave the family alone, walking out to Francine's desk.
"Yes, I'll hold," Francine said into the receiver. Turning to Billy, she clarified. "They're checking."
"What? . . . No, no need to disrupt the trip. Everything is fine. Thank you." As she hung up the phone, she smiled at her boss. "Seems he is actually at the Capitol. My only question is which one of them," she pointed to Billy's office, "signed the permission slip and forgot?"
They both quickly headed back into Billy's office.
All three heads shot up at once as they entered.
"Relax," Billy told them.
Francine picked it up from there. "I just got off the phone with Capitol security. Phillip is there with his class. My only question is . . . which one of you signed the permission slip and doesn't remember?" She looked both Lee and Amanda in the eye, challenging each one to try and deny signing the form.
"It wasn't me!" they chorused, then looked expectantly at Jaime.
"Well it certainly wasn't me! Maybe Dad signed it last weekend."
"That must be it," exclaimed Amanda.
"That was awfully nice of Joe, but you would have thought he would have said something," added Lee sarcastically.
"Well, it's just nice that everything turned out okay," added Billy, trying to defuse a potentially difficult situation. "Look, why don't you three head home. I'm sure you will want to be there when Phillip gets home from school, right?"
"Yeah . . . I guess we had better keep you home for the rest of the day," Lee said, glancing at Jaime. "After all, we did say that we were signing you out for a family emergency."
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As soon as they arrived home, Amanda placed a call to her ex. "Joseph King, please . . . yes, I'll hold . . . Hi Joe! Sorry to interrupt your day, but did you happen to sign a field trip permission slip for Phillip last weekend? . . . You didn't? . . . No, no problem; we just need to make sure someone signs it tonight . . . Okay, I'll make sure they have their overnight bags packed for Friday . . . Thanks. See you then."
Lee gave her a puzzled look.
"Well, I didn't want him to give him the details of our little scare today. He isn't overly fond of our jobs, and letting him know that the boys were in danger—well we thought they were in danger—well . . . "
"I understand; that was quick thinking. But now we're left with the question of how Phillip ended up on the field trip without a parental signature. I think the school needs to revise their system if a student can slip through the cracks like that."
Amanda saw that Lee was getting agitated. Before the school wound up at the end of her husband's wrath, she placed a calming hand on his arm.
"Sweetheart, let's wait and see what Phillip has to say, hmm?"
"You're right. You're always right," he said with a smile and a quick kiss.
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Lee and Amanda were waiting for Phillip as he came through the back door a few hours later.
"Hi Mom, Lee," he said with a smile. "Did Jaime have practice? He wasn't on the bus."
"No, Dorkface, I've been home for hours," Jaime said as he headed into the kitchen for his standard afterschool snack.
"Don't call your brother names," Lee and Amanda said together.
"Jaime, why don't you take your snack up to your room. We'd like to talk to your brother," suggested Lee with a pointed look at his younger stepson.
"Ok," Jaime said around a mouthful of freshly baked sugar cookie. He quickly headed up the stairs with his booty; he didn't want to be around for whatever was going to happen to his brother!
"Have a seat," Lee suggested as he pointed to the bench across from where they were seated at the breakfast nook.
Phillip had no idea what was up, but from the look on both their faces, it wasn't going to end well for him.
"Just where were you today? When we went to pick you up at school, you weren't there. Your science teacher seemed to think you had 'ditched' since you weren't in her class. I saw you get on the bus this morning, so . . . " Lee looked expectantly at Phillip.
"I was with my social studies class on a field trip to the Capitol." Phillip looked back and forth between his mother and his stepfather. Neither one so much as blinked.
"Honest, that's where I was. You can check with my social studies teacher." They continued to stare at him.
"Mom? . . . Lee? . . . What's wrong?"
Lee glanced at Amanda, indicating that she should take the lead.
"Well, Sweetheart, just how did the school permit you to go on that field trip without a signed permission slip? See, neither of us," she indicated herself and Lee, "signed a slip. And before you dig yourself in any deeper, neither did your father."
Phillip just lowered his head, refusing to look at either of them. Well, his mother had always told him that the best answer was the truth . . . "ahhhh . . . ummmm . . . see . . . Lee's signature is pretty easy to forge." Once he got the worst part out, he just kept going. "See, things were always so hectic in the morning, and then I would forget at night. And I knew you would let me go on the field trip—after all, it was educational. And Mom, your signature is way, way too hard to try to duplicate. But Lee's, well, that's totally different; it's really only a set of squiggles. So I just kind of . . . ," he let the last sentence hang out there.
Amanda gave Lee a very pointed look. After all, his handwriting was abominable.
Lee merely shrugged and gave her a goofy grin. She might have converted him from a loner to a family man, but no one on the face of the earth would be able to improve his penmanship.
Amanda sighed. "You're right; we would have left you go on the field trip with your class. But you were definitely wrong in forging Lee's signature."
"But I was only trying to help," he pleaded. "You've been so sick in the mornings, which means Lee's been busy helping us get ready for school. And with Grandma at Aunt Lillian's . . . "
"Understood, Chief, and we appreciate that fact that you were trying to help. But that doesn't negate the fact that you did something wrong—very wrong. I think your mother and I need to talk this over. Why don't you head up to your room and start your homework; I know you must have some since you missed a lot of classes today for the trip."
Picking up his backpack, Phillip slowly trudged up the stairs.
Once they had heard his bedroom door close, both Lee and Amanda started to chuckle.
"You know he really was just trying to help us," Lee said with a smile.
"And if Augie hadn't messed things up, we never would have known," added Amanda.
"Yeah. But because Augie is Augie, Phillip's 'help' sent both of us into a state of panic . . . a state I don't appreciate being thrust upon my pregnant wife!"
"You have to admit, Sweetheart, that your signature is easy to duplicate; I've done it many times."
"What do you mean you've done it many times?" Lee gave his wife an indignant look.
"You haven't noticed that I no longer pest you for signatures before I take our case reports down to Billy?"
Lee just stared at her.
"Well, I figure that since I'm with you on the cases anyway-and my name and signature is next to yours-what does it matter? It's not like you actually read the reports before you put your scribble on them!"
Lee couldn't hold his laughter in any longer. "Thank you for saving me the aggravation, Honey. I've known for a long time that you've been forging my signature; after all, I am in the business of being observant. Just don't let Phillip or Jaime hear you say that. You know we're going to have to punish him, even though his intentions were good—just like I'm going to have to punish you tonight," he said the last part with a leer.
"I know," she sighed. While I'm looking forward to my punishment, I'm not so sure Phillip is looking forward to his."
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As the boys were doing the dinner dishes later that evening, Lee and Amanda could hear their whispered conversation from their seat on the sofa in the family room.
"So, Wormbrain, are you grounded?" asked Jaime.
"Yeah, but just for a week. It was worth it; the tour of the Capitol building was awesome."
"Only a week? Wow! Mom and Lee are really slipping."
"Well . . . I also have to spend at least an hour a day for the next two weeks practicing my penmanship. Seems Mom wants to make sure my writing never ends up like Lee's. Have you ever really seen it, Jaime? The dude seriously needs to go back to Mrs. Beyer's first grade class. He never would have made it to second grade with penmanship like that."
"Yeah, she was really strict about it. She used to make Andy stay after school to practice his penmanship, and it wasn't even half as bad as Lee's."
The sound of water running drown out the remainder of their conversation.
"Back to first grade, huh? I seriously doubt I would fit in those desks anymore," commented Lee.
"But I bet little Lee Stetson looked so cute sitting in his first-grade desk."
"Hey, I'm still cute!" He placed a quick kiss on her nose.
"Not that cute, buster! Even all that cuteness doesn't explain how your teachers left you get away with the chicken scratch you call handwriting."
"Oh, they didn't. But as soon as they really became frustrated with me and would assign me extra practice, the Colonel would be transferred. I then became another teacher's penmanship nightmare."
"Well, our boys aren't going to go down that crazy road. I will not have my future grandchildren being able to scare their parents to death because their father's handwriting is too easy to forge. I just hope Phillip has learned his lesson. If we hadn't gotten that false lead, we never would have known about Phillip's deception."
"So should we be angry with Augie for scaring us half to death or should we thank him for helping us nip Phillip's forgery career in the bud?" Lee asked with a wink.
"Well . . . Augie does act like he's about Phillip's age, and both of them were trying to help and while doing something wrong at the same time."
"I think I'll write Augie a little note explaining how we're actually thankful for his unwitting help, even if he did give us a scare."
"Wow, that's incredibly thoughtful of you, Sweetheart. I actually thought you would want to torture him."
"Oh, I plan on torturing him all right . . . I'm going to write that little note personally—in my own handwriting. He'll be looking over his shoulder for weeks expecting me to show up for revenge."
"But if you're writing him a thank you note . . . "
"Yeah, but it's going to take him forever to figure out what that note actually says!"
"You're incorrigible, you know that Stetson, right?"
"I know . . . and you wouldn't want me any other way," he said with a grin
"True, so very true," Amanda whispered as she gave her husband a sweet kiss.