Hey guys! I'm actually proud of this one, it's my longest oneshot ever at 1,635 words! Yay! I wanted to write this fic because I've been attempting to learn Japanese myself. After comparing all of the interjections, filler words, double vowels, silent letters, and all of that, I finally realized how freaking complicated English actually is! I wrote the Japanese Romanized instead of the actual symbols so that it would be easier to read. Enjoy! :D
Donnie muttered some colorful Japanese words under his breath. Does English really have to be this complicated?
"The worst part is the apostrophes. Japanese is much simpler," He concluded while flipping through his composition notebook. Out of his four brothers, Don was the worst speaker of English. Sure he knows more than enough words to piece them together in sentences, but he is a horrid speller. Not to mention that his penmanship looked awkward and unlike the original letters themselves. The only thing he was good at in this second language was reading. Splinter could come home with an armload of books from his daily scavenging, and Don would've read them all by dinnertime. Don shook his head.
"This assignment is going to be the death of me…" He whispered while attempting to fill up the page with hieroglyphics. April walks in to find the brainy turtle cooped up in the corner of his room, cursing in what sounded to be another language.
"Uh, Don? Are you okay?" She asks curiously while cocking her head. A faint blush tinted his olive cheeks. "Yeah, I'm just doing some English homework." April's jaw dropped. "What?" Don asks with a chuckle.
"Nothing, really. I just didn't know that you guys had homework! So are you guys like, homeschooled or something?" She questions. "Of course we have homework." Don says casually. Twirling his pencil like his Bo staff, he continues.
"Splinter trained us in Ninjitsu, but he also taught us our academics. Every Saturday afternoon and Sunday morning we have training, and then our lessons from Master Splinter. I'm surprised you haven't noticed by now, actually." April nodded, and to let the new information from her friend sink in. She notes a fault in Don's story and decided to point it out. "But I thought Splinter was Japanese?" Don sighed and dropped his pencil.
"Yeah. That's the fun part. First we learned Japanese, then we-"
April interrupted his explanation. "So, let me get this straight-You all speak Japanese AND English? That's awesome!" Don nods. "Well, it's not as cool as it sounds. I really hate English. I've been here for hours trying to figure out this paper out. I mean, the others already got theirs done! Even Mikey!" He says frustrated with folded arms. April takes the paper out of his hands and reads the assignment.
"Write 10 synonyms for words that you already know. Then, use each one in a sentence." She laughs. "Really? This is so easy, Don! This is work for a third grader!" She notices Don look at the floor in shame. "For you, maybe." He muttered. Grabbing the crumpled up paper from the redhead, he scooted around so that he faced the wall.
"Sorry, Donnie," she says guiltily. "I didn't know that this was actually that hard for you." Scratching her head she tries to think of something to cheer him up. "Here. Since you always help me with my science and math homework, I think the least I can do is return the favor. She sees the corners of Don's lips twitch into a small smile as he turns back around.
"Okay, so a synonym is just a fancy word meaning the same or similar to another word." Noticing the confusion on Donnie's face, she continues. "So, a synonym for great would be fantastic…Or a synonym for sour would be bitter. Get it?" Don gives her a gap toothed smile. "Yeah, I'll write those." April rolled her eyes and snatched the pencil from his hand. "No, you are going to come up with your own." He groans and taps his pencil on his chin. "I got it! How about happy and joyful?" He asks. "Good job!" After a while of April checking his answers and giving many positive remarks, Don finally insists that he is done. He reads his paper aloud:
Happy and Joyful.
I was happy when I realized that this paper wasn't so hard. April is joyful that I got it through my thick skull!
Sick and ill
I am sick of writing this paper. Can words make you ill?
\
Trash and garbage.
English is trash. Whoever came up with the idea should be thrown in the garbage.
Book and novel
I could be reading my latest novel, but instead I have to complete this assignment before reading my book.
Sewer and home
April says that sewer and home are not synonyms. I beg to differ.
Mirror and reflection generator
I think that the reflection generator would be a better name for a mirror.
Odor and stench
When I walked into Raph's room, there was a terrible odor. Just like the pizza stench from Mikey's.
Glass and cup
I need a cup to drink my water. I need a glass to drink my orange juice.
Sack and Bag
I carried bags and sacks full of food home today.
Machine and device
Finally! I can get working on my latest machine-a device that will do my homework for me!
April smiles. "Was it really necessary to put in the sarcastic comments?" Don grins and responds in a sing-song voice. "Yes. It waaas." April rolled her eyes. "So now that you've got your homework done, can you show me some Japanese? I really want to take that class at school next year, and I want to get a head start.
"So does this mean I'm your tutor now?" He asks teasingly. "Yup!" Don gets out his notebook and flips to a new page. "So…What do you want to know?" April thinks for a moment before responding. "Show me the letters first." Donnie laughs. April narrows her eyes. "What's so funny?" "I hate to break it to you April, but there are no letters." April's confident posture deflated.
"There's…Not?" Don chuckles. "Nope. In Japanese we have Kanji. These are sounds that are represented by symbols, but they are not actually considered letters." Don grabs an ink pen off of his desk and returns to his "pupil"
Now these Kanji are HA, HI, FU, HE, and HO. They look like…" Don says while drawing the light strokes of the Kanji. "This." He then ripped out the page from his notebook and hands it to April. "Learn these first, and then I'll teach you more tomorrow. You won't really need to know how to actually write them until later." April marveled at the perfect lines of the kanji and grinned goofily. She almost didn't notice Donnie telling her that she should get some rest. Almost.
"Awe, but I'm not tired." She protests. "Teach me some phrases at least! I want to confuse the crap out of my aunt! Please?" She begs, and then breaks out her secret weapon: The pout. "Oh, come on April, you I'll show you more tomorrow," He says while trying to break eye contact. She juts out more of her lower lip. "Okay, okay, fine," he grumbles.
"Okay, um…How about we start with "Good morning." That is Ohayōgozaimasu." April tried to speak the word with as much authenticity as in which she heard it, but it ended up sounding like gibberish. She rolled each sound off of her tongue, but it still didn't sound right. Don sighed. "Okay, write that one down and practice it later. Now try Oyasuminasai. This means goodnight, but you can also say it as goodbye if it is later in the day." April tries out the foreign word, but it barely sounded comprehensible to Don's ears.
Sensing her frustration, Don says, "Don't worry April, you'll get it. Plus, you know you have three other turtles to ask about Japanese, too! Now, you can try again tomorrow, but it is already nine-thirty." April wanted to protest, but she was pretty tired.
While walking out of Don's room, she adds, "Oyasuminasai!" Don beams with pride. "Gozen-chū ni anata o sanshō shite kudasai, He yells as down the hallway. Don lied on his bed and sighed with content. It was fun being tutored, and being a tutor!
Epilogue
April smiled. Today, in her second Japanese lesson from Don, she was going to impress him with a new sentence she is learning from Mikey.
"Okay, April, "What's up?" in Japanese is Anata wa totemo minikui to futotte iru." April nodded and repeated the phrase many times, until Mikey deemed it acceptable. "Good job, April! Now, tell that to Don, and he'll be so impressed!" He says in an overly peppy voice. Mikey could hardly suppress his laughter as April trotted off to the purple-clad turtle's room.
When she got there, Donnie was welding some sort of machine. When he looked up, he smiled. "Ohayōgozaimasu!" He says happily.
"Anata wa totemo minikui to futotte iru!" April replies giddily. Don's face scrunched up in confusion. "Huh?" He says, obviously perplexed at her new sentence.
"Did I say it wrong?" April asks sadly. She had been waiting to say that all day and she messed it up! How embarrassing! "Um, April, could you say that again for me?" He asks sweetly. "Uh, sure. It was Anata wa totemo minikui to futotte iru. Donnie scowls. "Who told you that?"
He questions. "Mikey. Why?" Don gets up to leave, but April stops him. "What's the big deal?! I only asked you "what's up!" Is that crime around here or something?" April yells impatiently. Don chuckles.
"No, April, the "Crime" here is that you just called me fat and ugly in Japanese. That's why if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go and kill my little brother." April rubbed the back of her neck in embarrassment but doesn't stop him. She hears screaming and laughing in the next room and is not about to interrupt Mikey's beatdown anytime soon. Moral of the story, never let Mikey be your tutor, stick with Don.