A/N: This is my first piece so I'd appreciate any advice, seriously, if it's crap just tell me. I don't usually ship Spirk but an idea came and then this happened. Disclaimer: I own nothing Star Trek or any of the characters.
A Tune Played Before
"I'm glad you could make it!" smiled Amanda Grayson as she poured an oddly green tea into the delicate cups before her.
"Yes," replied Kirk grinning a little as he stepped through the intricately carved doorway "I don't think I've gotten to know you half as well as I'd like to. For example, why did you decide to live here of all places."
He sat down and sipped the tea. It was minty, but had a strangely sour after taste. "Why do I get the distinct impression that you've lured me here to tell me something I'm not going to like one bit."
"I just wanted to THANK you for bringing my only child back from the dead!" She said looking a bit embarrassed.
"Well, you'd have to thank the doctor for that, he's the one who had to deal with that stubborn devil inside his head," He looked at her sheepishly "no offence."
"None taken, about 80 years ago I couldn't even stand being in the same room as Vulcans. That emotionless stare they have, used to creep me out with their cold dark eyes. Little did I know that I would eventually be living with a whole planet of them, and give birth to one!"
She sipped her tea and stared curiously at Kirk. A lyre played somewhere outside, probably in the nearby courtyard. It was a little out of tune, but still better than that one time Kirk had attempted it.
"That would be Spock," said Amanda "He remembers the instrument but hasn't quite gotten a hang of all the little nuances yet."
"You know, I didn't even realize he could play until my second year on the Enterprise, in fact, he's still surprising me, I probably don't know half of what he can do."
"I know what you mean, Sarek went on for months saying how silly human games were. Then 2 years after our marriage he reveals to me that he can play chess better than any of the old human masters. According to him it wasn't a game but a 'test of strategy and focus'. I personally prefer UNO, less focus and more making the Vulcans lose their patience and silently throwing tantrums."
"You got Vulcans to play UNO!?" shouted Kirk a look of surprise on his face.
"It wasn't that hard you know, they really enjoy a lot of human customs! Of course they'd never admit it, it's all about 'research'." Amanda rolled her eyes and drew quotation marks in the air.
"You don't mind that Sarek never tells you how he actually feels?"
"But he does! Just not like humans do, we have our telepathic bond first of all, and I can usually pick up everything else he tries to block if I look close enough."
Kirk looked lost in thought for a moment, "You must have to be pretty close to a Vulcan to know how they feel." he said quietly, almost to himself."
"Kirk, you and Spock, well… is there… a bit more, to your relationship?"
Kirk stared at her blankly for a few moments. "Well, we will always be friends, and I'd surely save his life again if that's what you…"
"No, no! You see, you and I both know Spock better than any creatures have ever known him, except for maybe I-Chaya. And I've seen the way you change when you are around him. It seems to me like when you're together you function better than when you're apart. And, even though I've lived among unfeeling computers for decades, I'm pretty sure I still know that's what love is."
Kirk's face was suddenly bright red,
"I don't think you understand," he conjectured quietly "we are close but it has never been, could never be…"
"I know, that kind of relationship is usually, frowned upon by Vulcans because of their damned logic, no use for procreation or whatever. But Spock accepted his human half long ago when he applied to Starfleet Academy, you wouldn't be hurting him."
"I don't think he sees our relationship in that way, he's just starting to understand what friendship is, he's just remembering me, his life, his lyre. And no matter what I think of him, it could never be returned."
Amanda laughed a little under her breath, "Remember who you're talking to, when I met Sarek, and eventually realized I had feelings for this alien man. I thought that he never would or could return those same feelings. And even though he still acts like he doesn't care for me in human ways, the intensity of his hidden love towards me is always there. When around you, Spock acts completely different, I know how Vulcans show love, I know how Spock shows love, I raised him."
Kirk looked into his cup, "But Sarek and you, him choosing you as a mate was logical, he required a mate to have children with, and you were available. Even though Spock may be half human, he still runs on logic, it's the basis of his existence. And I am the least logical choice for him."
"Pshh, you underestimate Sarek, he could have chosen many females from Vulcan, his choice was me. An illogical Terran female who likes expensive jewelry and has a bad habit of saying too much at the wrong time." Kirk chuckled at this statement
"No one knows exactly what goes on in the Vulcan mind," Amanda continued "but one can get to know the Vulcan heart, and you have. Now you just need to make it painfully clear to him, because one thing Vulcans cannot do is take a hint."
Kirk set down the teacup that he had kept clenched in his hand for the past 10 minutes, and leaned a little closer to her.
"I'm glad we had this talk, Amanda, but I don't know if either of us could withstand this shift in our relationship at this point in time. It's not that I'm afraid, I just… don't want to hurt him, he's so vulnerable right now."
"Sometimes the only time you can communicate is when his barriers are down, you get to talk to the real him for once."
"Amanda, I will let you know if anything changes, but just don't plan a wedding or anything."
Amanda smiled wryly as Kirk stood up to leave. "I'm going to give you a simple Terran goodbye before I leave, the hand thingy still hurts my fingers."
"Goodbye Jim Kirk, and please, protect my child." Amanda watched him walk back to his ship through her window the alien sun scorching the back of his neck.
She bit her lips"I wish he knew," she murmured to herself "how such a small talk could finally open Spock up to him." Amanda knew that once the ship was gone she wouldn't see her son for a very long time, still, it would be alright knowing that there was someone out there that would protect him. Because he needed some kind of love even if he wouldn't admit it to anyone. She wished them luck on the dangerous path that they would take on together. Only a few people could hold the keys to a Vulcan's heart, and that was quite a burden to bear alone.
