Picks up after Bella jumps from the cliff in New Moon. Enjoy. Btw, this is most likely way different from the book cuz IDC. That's the way it's supposed to be.
also i haven't read them books in years. ya hearddd.
There's something about dying.
The blackness in which she's sinking seeps into every crevice and she sees stars behind her lids.
This was never her intention.
Where is her savior?
It's cold but the sun is off chasing demons;
her demons that can't seem to go not matter how far away they are or
how alone they've left her.
Briefly, before passing out, she thinks about fighting.
What would it be like to fight a current and win?
To fight a vampire and win?
To be left and love again?
She fades and figures she'll never know.
(Not that she doesn't want to.)
Her skin and bones weigh into him until he sets her on the beach. She's so small, and she's not breathing. This isn't fair to her or to him.
The monsters of every child's nightmare really exist but even though they're not kids anymore they're still haunted.
They've left her broken. Now he's just an animal.
He always ends up with the rusty side of the dime.
He pumps her chest and pushes air between her blue, blue lips until she's coughing up seawater. Her chocolate eyes find his first, above anything else.
This isn't the way he'd imagined their first kiss.
"Jake?"
Yeah. Jake. Always Jake.
Always.
He doesn't say anything, partially because he's mad she jumped without being safe and partially because he's afraid he'll cry.
What if she'd died?
What would be his purpose then?
Instead he pulls her up and enfolds her into his heat. She's shivering, still gasping and coughing. She tries to give him a reason. Any reason.
Nothing makes sense and he doesn't want to hear it.
He pulls her close and tells her to shut her mouth.
"Just stop, Bella. You're so cold. It's okay, we'll talk about it later."
She doesn't listen, of course. But he pulls her in close anyways, relishing in the breath that escapes her frozen lips and the fingers that curl around him.
Alive.
Safe.
That's all that matters.
The details are nothing but a technicality.
It's funny how he saves her every time.
This time it's truly from death, truly from the grasp of the abyss.
When she regains consciousness he is the first thing she sees.
She realizes that she never wants to stop looking.
"Jake?"
The leftover water burns away her voice.
It feels like someone has shoved a fire poker down her throat and not just once.
He doesn't answer.
She thinks maybe she's hurt him.
Does he really think she'd leave on purpose?
That life is horrible enough for her to want to end it all?
Impossible.
It was a whim; a foolish thought.
She'd been feeling dangerous; daring.
(not chasing ghosts, oh no.)
Her excuses fall on deaf ears.
Instead he pulls her close and tells her to be quiet.
That's when she knows she's forgiven.
I'm sorry. Don't you know I'm not that person anymore?
I don't want to be anywhere else but here.
I'm so tired of chasing shadows.
I'm so tired of being numb.
Eventually she stops trying to reason and folds to the heat.
He leads her to his house and she counts the clenches of his jaw every time hers make an audible clatter.
So cold.
But she's never felt so warm.
Something about almost dying makes everything bittersweet.
tbc.