"Of course he's punching people. He used to be with me all day. Now, he's in day care every day so he can spend ten minutes with you every three hours."
"Oh, so that's what making him violent? Look, if you can't communicate well enough to tell me that..."
"Don't lecture me, Miranda Bailey. I'm not one of your students. I know with all the time you spend around here, it's hard to defrenciate sometimes."
Miranda sat in her car sifting through her purse trying to find the address of the hotel Tucker had been staying at for the past three months. The argument she and Tucker had earlier echoed in her head, she couldn't push it to the back of her mind anymore. The piece of paper was folded and crumpled at the bottom of her bag, the address written in Tucker's neat handwriting. He had offered earlier to take care of the baby for the night so she figured he would be there. She hoped George could handle Tuck for a few hours, he was usually good with him. She was grateful for George's thoughtfulness and made a mental note to get him in on a good surgery.
The drive to the hotel would take less than fifteen minutes but she was nervous about what would happen. Would he want her there? What if all this did was make them even more mad at each other? She didn't want to yell and argue anymore, not with Tucker, she missed having him around. She couldn't come home to an empty bed anymore, she couldn't look at the pictures hanging on the wall of them smiling, and laughing. Rain pounded the windshield of her car as she drove and she remembered the night that he packed his things and left. It was a couple of nights after Tuck had come out of surgery.
Tucker's car was in the driveway and the door was open, she hoped maybe a few days away was all he needed. Everything looked the way she had left it, the kitchen table was still covered in papers, Tuck's toys were still spread out over the living room floor. But when she walked down the hall she could hear draws shutting, their bedroom door was open and she could see Tucker packing a suitcase. He looked up when he heard her keys hit the table and stopped folding his clothes. Miranda walked into the bedroom and said "I wasn't sure what I'd find when I came home."
"I came to get some more of my stuff, I didn't think you would be here. How's Tuck is he still doing okay?"
"Yeah, he's doing a lot better, he was sleeping when I left. We're going to keep him a few more days." Tucker nodded and said that was good, and they were quiet for a moment, Miranda glanced at all of his clothes spread out on the bed. It was more than what he would need for a couple of days. "You're really leaving. This is it after twelve years."
"I don't know why you're surprised, it hasn't felt like you wanted me around much these past couple of months." Tucker walked around to the other side of the bed and went back to packing his clothes.
"Our son almost died a few days ago, and you're picking now as a good time to walk out? Look I know you're mad at me, and I know you're tired of me not being around to help out but Tuck needs both of us right now."
"He'll still have me, it's you that he doesn't have. And I'm tired of waiting around for you to make time for our family." He started to zip his suitcase, he stopped to looked up at her and almost smiled. "I thought you'd be relieved, you don't have to feel guilty about coming home late or canceling plans."
"Tucker, I still want our marriage, but you have to understand-I"
"Oh, I understand Miranda, I understand that you value your career more than you value your family and I understand that you'd pick surgery over me." Miranda looked away from him.
"It's not that I'm picking surgery over you, I have a responsibility."
"You have a responsibility to your marriage, and your son, but we just aren't enough for you are we?" Tucker looked away from her and shook his head gently, "this isn't a marriage anymore, I can't be your husband anymore, Miranda."
"Then why are you still here, why did you stay so long if I've been so awful to you?"
"You know I keep asking myself that question and I honestly don't have an answer." They looked at each other for a moment both of them angry but neither of them saying anything more, and then Tucker took his off wedding ring and tossed it on their bed. He picked up his suitcase and walked out of the bedroom without looking at her. On his way out the door he glanced back at Miranda, she was still looking at the bed but her arms were no longer crossed, she rested one hand on her hip and the other ran through her hair. She looked like she would start crying; he turned away from her and closed the door behind him.
Miranda parked her car and walked into the hotel lobby, the piece of paper said that he was on the fifth floor. She realized in the elevator that she hadn't thought of what she would say and was once again nervous about what would happen. But she told herself not to worry, that she would convince him to come home. They would have to forgive each other for their son's sake. She turned left out of the elevator and found his room. She paused in front of his door took a deep breath and fixed her hair. She knocked, and listened for him. When she didn't hear him she called softly "Tucker it's me."
Tucker answered the door in a long sleeve t-shirt and jeans, looking a little surprised to see his wife, especially after the fight they had earlier at the hospital. She had a look on her face that said she was determined to do or say something, that she had a point to make. Miranda looked up at him, he looked tired and a little distant, the way he had been for a long time. "I came by to say.." she started to tell him why she was there, tried to tell him that she missed him but she couldn't focus on the words. Looking at him standing there she realized how sad they had made themselves and she didn't feel bitter about him leaving anymore.
"I want you to come home Tucker," she blurted out, "because you're my husband, and our son misses you. I miss you. I don't sleep well when you aren't next to me." She took a few steps into the room and dropped her purse on the floor. He moved slightly to allow her to come in and shut the door after her but he was still a little too shocked to say anything. She shrugged and said, "I'm sorry that I work to much, and I'm sorry that I'm not around enough but I don't want you to divorce me, and I don't want you to date other women." She took a deep breath and continued, "I'm going to fix this, I'll make time for you and Tuck. I know I've said it before but I mean it this time. I can't lose you. " She looked away from him and felt tears begin to fall from her eyes. Tucker lifted her chin so that her eyes met his and he cradled her face in his hands, wiped her tears away.
"I'm sorry too, I shouldn't have walked out. I don't want to lose you either." Tucker took another step towards her, sighed and said "I don't know how we got here." Looking at her now he realized that she was in as much pain as he was and he couldn't be angry with her anymore.
She closed her eyes tilting her head slightly as he leaned down to kiss her. Resting her hands on his chest she felt his arms slide around her waist and the familiar softness of his lips. He pushed her bangs out of her eyes and rested his hand on the curve between her neck and shoulder, his thumb brushing her throat.
"I'll come home, Miranda." She sighed with relief and he started kissing her again. It didn't matter that they hadn't solved their problems yet, these apologies and promises were all they needed for now. Their defenses were too thin to withstand another argument, too thin to stay guarded. He slid her jacket off her shoulders, letting it fall to the floor. He lifted his t-shirt over his head, Miranda slid her hands over his warm bare chest and he whispered to her again that he would come home. She kicked off her shoes as he pulled her shirt over her head. Running his hands over her soft skin he led her to the hotel bed. Tugging at his belt buckle Miranda pulled him onto the bed with her. With his body pressing against hers she was reminded that her home is in his arms and that being a surgeon didn't mean anything without her family.