There's a magical land I know,
A place where I grew up.
And I'd make a deal with the devil himself,
to see that place blown up.
There in that interesting land I know
where no one has a brain,
they all worship christmas
yet they think I'm insane
I would get down on my knees
and service the Japanese
'til I reek of old sushi but please
bomb Whoville!
I would happily kowtow
to my new leader, Chairman Mao.
I would even learn Chinese
Just please, bomb Whoville!
Bomb Whoville!
Bomb Whoville!
I would go tell Jong Il Kim (He means the leader of North Korea Kim Jong Ill)
that they're making fun of him
in a Kimchi-hating town that's known
as Whoville
Better yet I've got a plan
I will convince Pakistan
that India can be found somewhere
in Whoville
Whoville is a place where I grew up
They pelted me with rocks and garbage
I guess its tough to be a grinch in the Home of the Whos!
And if you show even a little dread for christmas
then they're doubly irate!
Oh I would climb a rocky crag
and plant a Russian flag
on a smoldering hole once known
as Whoville
Oh it would be a tragic loss
If both the Mayor and his cops
are somewhere out of town
when the danes nuke Whoville
It's a place named after total jerks
So what more can you expect, sir?
And if you try to express you're individuality
they will throw you to the ground
And they'll kick you in the teeth
Like they did to me
The bombs go down on that damn town
and The Town Hall's up in flames
The mayor's house we drowned then burned it down
But Whoville still smells the same
Many butts will breach on the day of the Whoville Feast
We'll erase christmas from site
But before we leave this land I loathe,
I bid Whoville "Good-night!"