A/N: This is a gift for Bee as a congratulations for reaching three hundred followers. I knew eventually I'd get drawn into doing something or another for this pair, when people ship rare-pairs so passionately, it really rubs off on me xD Hope you enjoy!
How to Ruin a Friendship by KatieFlint
... Come down and see me sometime!
Love,
Your friend, Hannah Abbott
Susan stared at the letter for a ridiculously long time.
She knew she was going to go, from the very first moment she read those words, but she kept trying to talk herself out of it.
It simply wasn't a good idea.
Susan and Hannah had kept in touch over the passing months but they'd rarely seen much of one and other in person. Partially because of the ways their lives were unfolding, and partially through Susan's own design. In fact, once they had parted ways at Hogwarts, Susan didn't think she had seen Hannah at all. Not even by Floo. It was a dreadful shame, but Susan wasn't sure it would be a good idea to see the sunshine blonde, even now.
Some good friend she was, Susan thought to herself. But she didn't mind calling herself a poor friend, so long as she could still be Hannah's friend.
Which, if Susan went to visit, as the letter requested, she knew she wouldn't be any more.
And after all these years, it would be a shame to loose someone like Hannah Abbott. With her freckled skin, engaging laugh, and pink lips that compliment her perpetually flushed cheeks… Susan has spent a lot of time thinking about those lips. About how they might sound, saying her name lovingly, or how they might taste, pressed softly against her own.
Yes, Susan was going to visit Hannah's new establishment at the end of the month. And there, Susan knew, she was going to lose her best friend.
...
Preparing for her trip wasn't terribly difficult, and the travel by train made the whole thing feel as though it ought to be a rather pleasant, relaxed affair but for Susan it was anything but. Try as she might, Susan couldn't stop herself from twisting free strands of auburn hair nervously.
She'd often done this, particularly when she was anticipating an unfavorable outcome, which was why Susan had taken to plaiting her hair back in school. It had been convenient and had broken her of this habit, or so she thought.
Today though, Susan wore her hair down, and had chosen a honey yellow dress that she felt looked especially flattering against her form. It was simple, and despite playing into the cliché of a Hufflepuff, Susan found she genuinely enjoyed the color.
It also didn't hurt that women, plural mind you, had asked her to dance at Wicked Sister concerts when she wore this little number.
Dressed to impress, Susan wished desperately she could rid herself of the awful notion that she was rolling ever closer to the end of something important in her life; the train wheels marching soundly along like a funeral procession.
At least, Susan thought remorsefully, she still would look good, no matter how terribly things went.
...
"Suzie!" Hannah shouts, practically in Susan's ear. Susan had never been very fond of the name, and used to make a point of correcting Hannah, but today she let the nickname go without comment. She just didn't have it in her heart to contest such a trivial thing.
"Hannah," Susan responded warmly, enjoying the hug more than she ought to, "It's good to see you."
"And you!" Hannah's voice sounded almost ready to burst from her chest, and Susan could tell she was more than excited to catch up.
Recoiling from the embrace slowly, and with hidden reluctance, Susan gathered her things from the pavement beside her and allowed Hannah to lead the way out of the station. As they plodded down the winding sidewalks of Hogsmeade, Susan found herself smiling fondly, listening to Hannah recount all of the things she'd missed out on as of late.
She's beautiful like this, Susan thought to herself, glad she'd taken the train rather than apparating. It wasn't just her fear of the spell that had kept her coming directly, but the need to prepare herself as well.
Things weren't as Susan might like them to be, but in this moment, she could pretend they were. And it made things perfect, for a little while.
"Here we are!" Hannah exclaimed, her sun kissed curls bouncing against her tightly wound scarf, "Isn't it great?"
"It's wonderful," Susan commented, genuinely pleased.
It was a small pub, with a sign swinging from its front that read, Abbott's Ale House and Accommodations. It honestly didn't look all that flashy in comparison to its distant neighbor, The Three Broomsticks, but Susan would choose to visit here every single day if she could.
It didn't matter what the place might look like, so long as she could see Hannah.
"Let's go inside and get you settled shall we?" Hannah moves toward the door, Susan following diligently behind.
...
"We'll be rooming together, just like old times!" Hannah beams, showing Susan to the master bedroom. To her bedroom.
It's cozy, and Susan instantly dislikes the fact. She's spent years playing a game of cat and mouse with her affections for the sparkling blonde, and already Susan feels the room's snug ambiance has the dangerous potential to tip her affections over the edge.
"Just like old times," Susan forces her smile to relax, if only marginally. She has no reason to tell Hannah no. And she's grateful to be staying here free of charge, especially considering all the vacancies have been filled for the next two weeks; the extent of Susan's stay.
"Exactly," Hannah bubbles, bouncing onto the bed, sinking as the excessive amount of goose down settles, "You can put your closes away in the closet later, come sit! You've hardly said anything about what you've been doing."
"Well," Susan clambers onto the bed with as much dignity as she can manage, remembering how they used to gossip like this back in the day, "I've been keeping busy. Lots of work to do for the Ministry."
And there was. Susan had taken up a position with the Magical Law Enforcement department. Partially due to the Wizarding Communities current state of affairs, and partially to honor her late Aunt Amelia. Brilliant and fiercely fair in her work, Susan considered it a great honored whenever someone made comparisons between the two of them.
Hannah used to do it all the time…
"And are you seeing anyone?"
The question's jarring, even though Susan had told herself to expect for it. She freezes and her brain stalls. Then, remembering her manners, Susan gives her head a brisk shake, "No, no one for me at the moment."
Hannah gives her a look Susan can't quite place, but she's too wrapped up in the own thoughts to observe it before it dissipates, replaced by that radiant smile of Hannah's.
Susan can't bring herself to ask Hannah the same question in return, and so they move on to a different subject all together.
...
It's been a week, and Susan feels she's reached her breaking point. This tip-toeing around her obvious attraction to the blonde was appealing when they were second years, fetching as fourth years, but it was growing tiresome as eighth years. Now, it's simply absurd. Hannah may not want to discuss the obvious affections Susan has for her, but Susan's done pretending it's not there in her touches, in the flow of her speech, or buried deep within her being like the constant beating of her heart.
Susan's in love with Hannah Marguerite Abbott, and it's about time she learned that.
Of course, it's easier to think to do something than it actually is to do it. Susan may work with a stand and jury, but she's finding it difficult to say what's on her mind as she sits at the bar, watching Hannah wipe down the counter.
And, no sooner does Susan cough up a feeble, "Hannah, I'd like to…", does the biggest reason for her self-inflicted silence come through the Inn's front door. Neville Longbottom. The boy, now man, that had stolen Hannah's heart from her.
Neville enters the pub and Hannah rushes to greet him with a hug. The two exchange hushed whispers, looking quite the pair Susan always pictured them to be. She may not have asked Hannah if she was seeing someone, but remembering how these two were then and now, Susan thinks she knows the answer. She tries not to look too closely, for her own sake. And out of respect to her friend… Well, soon to be ex-friend she's sure.
Susan's still going to tell her the truth, when she gets the chance.
"Susan!" Hannah gestures, "You remember Neville, yeah?"
...
It's almost impossible to hate a man like Neville Longbottom, but he makes it slightly easier when he tells her he's seeing the former Ravenclaw oddity, Luna Lovegood. It's not right of him to break Hannah's heart like that.
When school was ending, Susan thought for certain she'd be receiving a wedding invitation from the two of them any month, but one never came. And Susan was too afraid to bring it up. Now though, she wants to ask Neville right to his face. She doesn't however, being as polite as she is.
Instead, Susan tolerances Neville's stories and accepts their shared laughter, genuinely enjoying some of the conversation, but constantly wondering what happened between the two of them. Why hadn't this, something Susan was so certain of, worked out?
The pub's quiet when they first sit down together, but as the day begins to give way to a setting sun, patrons and guests begin to flock inside, dislodging Hannah from her seat more and more often until finally she's back to serving drinks full time.
Susan considers talking to Neville on her own, but they mutually seem to agree that without Hannah, their need to converse with one and other has also left them. Both rising, they return formal farewells and depart for different directions.
Susan wants some time to herself, and just now, the pub's a little too busy for her liking. She heads upstairs to think, and plan how she's going to do this.
...
"You wouldn't believe how long it took for old Mr. Carroll to finish his meal," Hannah enters the bedroom looking tired, but still wearing a smile on her face. She slips out of her shoes and climbs onto the duvet, slowing to a stop the moment her head touches the soft bedding.
Not just tired, Susan thinks to herself, Hannah looks downright exhausted. Setting aside the book she'd been reading, Susan climbs outside from beneath the warmth of the covers, laying back down beside Hannah's _ form.
"I suppose that's the danger of running a pub, old men with gummy mouths," Susan jokes, looking up at the ceiling. Even now, tired and frazzled, Hannah still looks as beautiful as the day Susan fell for her. Hannah's tuckered laugh brings a small aching to her chest.
Thinking about the bags she's already packed in the closet, Susan knows she should talk to Hannah before she goes to change. There's a late train leaving the station in a couple hours and Susan's already picked up a ticket for the return trip. Hannah would let her spend the night, but after she says what she has to say, Susan doesn't want to linger. The rejection will only hurt more that way.
"Hannah…" Susan's voice feels weak, but she tries not to let it waver, "There's something I've… Something I need to… Hannah, we've known each other for years, and I'm sorry to ruin our friendship like this. Honestly. But, I can't keep living like this."
Hannah's sits up, looking confused and more than a little concerned, "Suzie, what're you talking about? You're my best friend! How could you ever ruin our friendship?"
"Because I'm in love with you,"
Susan can feel Hannah's eyes on her, but she continues to stare at the ceiling, unable to meet that gaze. It's a pitiful attempt to ignore what she's just done, but it's the best Susan can do, given the situation.
"Finally,"
Susan's brow furrows, finally?
Daring a glance, Susan finds Hannah, not put out or peeved, like she'd imagined, but rather; she looks delighted.
Her smile radiates down on Susan, like a bright light, and it's infectious. Even as confused as she now is, Susan can't help but smile back, "What do you mean, 'finally'?"
"Don't you know, that I'm in love with you too?" Hannah seems to think it's pretty obvious, given her words, but Susan's never been more shell-shocked in her entire life.
"What? No, what?" Susan can't believe what she's just heard, and furthermore, she's finding it hard to wrap her head around the concept. This was certainly not the outcome she'd expected of the evening, "Since when."
"I don't know," Hannah shrugs, "Maybe since third year. I always figured you knew. Just didn't think you wanted to take it any further."
"But- What about Longbottom, you had a crush on him!" Susan squawks, reeling.
"Well, yeah. I'm allowed to have crushes Suzie. But I never loved him," Hannah is eerily calm and collected, almost laughing at Susan's questions. Because, all this time, it's been Susan's own fears keeping them apart, not Hannah's rejection, "He thought you were here today as my girlfriend, silly man… You really didn't know?"
Susan shakes her head, a sensation akin floating is beginning to take over her body, and the pounding in her chest is threatening to burst from from within.
Hannah Abbott. Blonde haired, funny, sun-kissed Hannah Abbott, is in love with her, Susan Bones. And has been for years.
"This may sound dumb," Hannah's voice softens, the mirth settling, "But if it's alright, I'd like to kiss you right now."
Susan, still in shock but recovering, nods a few times affirmatively. And, raising herself onto her elbows, leans into the kiss Hannah offers. It's soft, and gentle. Like a lot of kisses Susan's experienced, but none of them have tasted quite this sweet. None of them have been Hannah before.
"I'm glad," Hannah's lips curl against Susan's in delight.
"Glad?"
"That you decided to ruin our friendship. I've always thought this would be much better."
Susan smiles and receives another kiss,
"Me too."
End
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