Another Friday... another silly story.

This was actually something that my Katie requested on Wed.

I hope you all enjoy it!!

I do not own Twilight.

"You never cease to amaze me Jake." Bella sighed, sitting on the edge of his bed. His large arm was stretched over his face, covering his eyes but she could see the corner of his mouth turn up into a grin, a grin that she new was a cocky one. She reached over, pulled a pillow from the other side of the bed and with a slight flick of her wrist, hit him with it.

Feathers few from the sides as the seams burst open, sending feathers flying in every direction. Jacob finally moved his arm and snatched one from the air. His eyes moved to look at Bella and he frowned. "That was my favorite pillow." He complained with a pout. He looked down and finally noticed that the feathers were covering him completely.

Had Bella been human she would have been blushing furiously. A similar scenario had come to mind instantly, with her husband of nine years in Jake's place. Wistfully, she recalled her honeymoon in perfect detail despite the fact that it had happened when she had been human.

Then, realizing that she was sitting in bed with her soon to be son in law and reminiscing about her honeymoon, she jumped up from the bed. She shuddered, trying to block the images from her mind of honeymoons, the large wolf… and her daughter.

Jacob's eyebrow shot up questioningly, though he didn't say a word. He knew that she was embarrassed about something, though whatever it could be was a mystery to him.

She shrugged, walking towards the door. "You're the only werewolf I've ever known with the ability to get sick. There are three days until the wedding. Perk up or you'll have Alice on your case for a century." Bella opened the door and was about to leave when she changed her mind.

Looking over her shoulder, she glanced back at Jacob to see that he still hadn't moved from his spot on the bed. "It looks like you got into a chicken coop Jake!" She laughed. He pulled his head up off of his pillow and huffed, sending feathers flying away from his face but sticking more into his hair.

Giggling, Bella was just able to close the door before he chucked the pillow he had been laying on in her direction. Jacob groaned in frustration as the only other pillow he had fell apart, littering the floor with more feathers. He let his head fall back onto the bed.

It took about another hour, but eventually Jacob stepped out of his room. He'd tried his hardest to clean up the massive amounts of feathers littering both his bed and his bedroom floor, but had given up five minutes in. He felt like hell and just didn't have the patients.

Not that he would have had the patients to clean up if he was healthy, but he certainly didn't mind using his cold as an excuse.

The house was eerily quiet, especially for what time it was. When he had checked his alarm clock it has been only a few minutes past one in the afternoon. Usually by this time, Emmett and Renesmee were getting into all sorts of trouble. Rosalie would be in the garage, tinkering around on one of the cars. Edward would be playing his piano with Bella reading a book quietly on the couch. Esme would usually be in the kitchen, banging some pots and pans around, making something for him and Nessie to snack on. Alice was usually bouncing around, especially lately, ordering everyone around because of the wedding.

He'd gotten used to the flow of people around him in the last few years. He'd been living with the Cullen's since his father moved to Hawaii with Jacob's sister and her husband five years earlier. Washington's cold weather had been a little too much for him to stand as the years went by. The snow made it harder for him to get around in his wheelchair. The Cullen's had offered up a room in their house immediately, and he'd moved into Edward's old room without a second thought. Knowing he'd be able to spend much more time with Renesmee made it easier to accept that he was moving into Edward's room. He didn't even want to know what he and Bella had done in there…

The only thing he bothered replacing was the bed.

Suspicious of the silence, he peered around the corner and down the stairs. Jacob strained to hear any noises in the house, but found none. It didn't help that his ears and nose were completely clogged from the cold he was suffering from. One good thing about it was he could hardly smell their awful stench, which admittedly, he was becoming quite used to. He wondered vaguely if the cold would stick with him through the wedding, and he wouldn't have to be bothered by the scent of the other vampires that were invited.

He straightened his back and cringed, his muscles stiff and achy.

Groaning, he made sure the box of tissues wedged under his arm was secure and slowly made his way down the stairs. The steps creaked under his hulking weight, and gave him away to anyone who might be in the house, letting them know he was finally up and about.

He felt her before he saw her.

As soon as he reached the second floor, he felt a light kick to his shin. "Hellllllo pup! You're finally awake!" Alice exclaimed bouncing up from behind him.

Jacob rolled his eyes heavenward, hoping that whatever she wanted, she would make it quick.

He wasn't if it made him a bad werewolf, but he almost never noticed the girl until it was too late. She was constantly sneaking up on him from every angle. He only had one excuse. She was just much too short. Jacob literally had to lower his gaze to see her, even when he was in wolf form.

Alice was a sneaky little devil.

"What do you want?" He mumbled grumpily, his voice hoarse and his words nasally. He grabbed a tissue from the box under his arm and blew his nose noisily into it.

Alice made a disgusted face, and instantly dropped it. She grabbed his arm and started dragging him towards her room. "I need you to come with me, I need to make sure your tuxedo fits perfectly and this is the only time I'll have a minute to make sure."

Jasper and Seth sat on the far side of the room by the window and didn't glance up as she dragged him towards them. Jacob didn't argue he knew there was no use. As she began to poke and prod him, pulling him this way and that way, his thoughts began to wander.

Why had he insisted on this wedding when Renesmee, so similar to her mother, had begged to just elope? Why had he been so insistent on a huge event? Things had gotten out of control with Alice and Rosalie in charge, they had taken over the house, bridal magazines were everywhere he looked, along with samples of every flower, decoration and invitation ever made. The amount of food he'd tasted in the last month made him sick to his stomach. They literally shoved food down his throat, until he was full.

And it took a lot to make him full.

Breaking his concentration, he could feel his nose start to tickle. He twitched it to the side a little, trying to make the awful feeling go away. He was hoping and praying that he wouldn't sneeze. Alice was carefully pinning up the cuffs on his jacket and he didn't really feel like being her new pin cushion.

"Aw Jacob, you look so handsome." Seth teased, finally tearing his gaze away from the civil war scene that Jasper was carefully building on the table between them.

Jacob rolled his eyes in response.

Big mistake.

He realized it as he did it. Whenever he was to look up, and he had to sneeze, it would help the sneeze come faster.

He tried, so hard, not to do it.

When he just couldn't help it anymore, he squeezed his eyes shut and let it out.

It was the loudest sneeze he'd ever let lose before, hurting even his own ears because it was loud. After it was finished he was afraid to open his eyes.

Eventually, he knew that he had to.

Opening them slowly, his face scrunched up, he surveyed the damage. Alice was leaning back on her own feet, eyes wide in shock. Her hand was still up in the air, ready with the needle. A piece of thread hung from her open mouth.

Seth had a similar expression. Complete shock.

Jasper on the other hand, looked deadly.

Jacob finally noticed the scene on the table.

All of Jasper's hard work, putting together a battle scene of the civil war, was ruined. Soldiers were scattered upon the battlefield, and on the floor below the table. Their little tents and cabins were toppled over on top of some of them.

A mini cannon had made it to the window and cracked it slightly.

"I'm so sorry…" Jacob started.

"Get out of here. Right. Now." Jasper mumbled, trying to hold his anger back, lest he make everyone angry. Alice shot Jacob a pitying expression and shooed him toward the door, while making her way over to Jasper and putting her arm around him in comfort.

Jacob ran from the room as quickly as possible and back to his own room, to hang his head in embarrassment.

~~O~~

It took almost two hours this time, before Jacob decided to poke his head out of his bedroom. He was ashamed that he'd hidden in his room like a wounded dog, and was sure that eventually someone was going to point it out.

He would blame that on him being sick too.

Jacob was able to make it all the way to the main floor before he encountered anyone this time, and when he did, it made him feel a billion times better.

Renesmee sat with her father on the living room floor, their backs facing Jacob. Their matching colored hair blazed in the sunlight coming in through the wall of windows. He watched her from the doorway as she turned her head in his direction and she smiled sweetly at him.

"How are you feeling sweetheart?" She asked, her eyes sad as she slowly got up from the floor and made her way over to him. He shrugged and let her pull him towards the couch.

Nessie pushed him onto the couch and hopped into his lap, hugging him to her. Edward cleared his throat from the floor, but didn't say anything. Nessie giggled. "Jake, are you lying about being sick so you don't have to get married?" She teased.

Jacob laughed. "You know that's impossible. If I was, my new dad-in-law would shoot me."

Edward chuckled and turned towards them, leaning back on one arm and finally giving Jacob a glimpse of what they had been doing.

In front of him, stood a tower of playing cards, that was built up for levels already. Each card was strategically placed so that they would lean into each other.

"What made you two decide to do that for the day?" Jacob asked, leaning back and trying to make himself comfortable, hugging Nessie's small body to his own.

He could feel her shrug. "Mom said that you needed to rest and for everyone to be quiet, so we didn't want to bother you with the piano." She said softly, tracing her finger along his chest.

"Actually, Jacob, your cold is a little concerning to Carlisle. We were talking about it a little earlier. He would like it if you went to go see him, he might have something that you can take to make you feel at least a little better." Edward said, true concern shining in his eyes.

Jacob smiled in response and was about to speak when Rosalie walked through the front door and passed through. She smirked at him. "But Edward… Carlisle isn't a vet…"

"Haha Aunt Rosalie. That wasn't very nice." Renesmee pouted, hugging her arms around Jacob's shoulders tightly, pulling him closer to him and burying her head between his chin and chest.

Jacob just smirked right back at her. "Yeah Aunt Rose… you should be nicer to me." Rosalie scowled and stormed out of the room.

They were all laughing happily, when Renessme brought her face up slightly to give Jacob a quick kiss.

Her beautiful red, curly hair brushed his nose ever so slightly.

Without any type of warning he tossed her to the side and sneezed, eyes squeezed shut.

It was much worse than before, sending his body back into the couch, moving it a few inches from where it was before. He heard and felt it slide across the floor.

When he opened his eyes, Renesmee was sitting beside him on the couch, But her surprised expression was not trained on him.

He turned in the direction she was looking.

The house of cards was gone.

He could see a few, across the room, one was under the armchair that sat in the corner. One was stuck up in a vase of flowers.

Edward sat staring up at him.

And slowly, reached up to wipe his face with the sleeve of his sweater.

Jacob was mortified beyond words.

"Jacob, it's alright, I'm not angry." Edward said softly, forcing himself to take a deep breath. "Just go see Carlisle, he's working on the cabin with Esme and Emmett."

Without another word, Jacob rose from the couch and made his way outside.

His tail between his legs.

~~O~~

The cabin that Esme had designed for them wasn't to far away, only about two miles away from both Edward and Bella's and the main house. They wanted them close for comfort, but far enough away from Edward's mind reading ability. For the newlywed's sanity, and for Edwards.

Renesmee hadn't been allowed to see the house yet, only Jacob had. She wanted to be surprised just as much as her mother was when she had gotten the house after getting married.

Jacob ran fast, as though someone were chasing him. All he wanted was to feel better and he prayed that Carlisle would be able to help him, even if it was just a little.

Esme was the first to see him.

"Oh hi darling!" She said, raising her hand to wave. He jogged up to her and gave her a quick hug, thankful that she wouldn't be able to catch anything from him. She put her hand on his head in a motherly way. "How are you feeling?"

"That's actually why I'm here. Edward told me that Carlisle might be able to help."

Esme nodded and called for her husband, who immediately appeared from around the side of the house. His clothes were dusty and his jeans were ripped, but he somehow still managed to look good. He smiled warmly at Jacob.

"Hi Jake, hold on just one moment, I have my bag inside. I brought some medicine from the hospital that may be able to help you. I'll be right back." He tossed the rag he had been holding towards Esme and ran inside.

Esme caught it with grace, but that didn't stop the dust cloud from forming in the air around it.

Jacob's nose twitched once.

Twice.

For the third time that day, Jacob let out the loudest sneeze ever, causing Esme to jump back, frightened.

"No no no…" He muttered to himself, scared to open his eyes.

Deep laugher came from above him and he opened them to see Emmett standing on the roof, leaning against the brick chimney.

"It's a damn good thing that we made this cabin out of brick Esme. Otherwise the big bad wolf would have huffed, puffed and blooooooown the house down!" He slapped his knee, not able to stop laughing at his own joke.

Carlisle came out of the cabin a moment later, a glass of water in one hand, two pills in the other. He looked up at Emmett and frowned disapprovingly.

Turning back to Jake his smile returned. "These should help."

~~O~~

"And that is the story of the three little pigs!" Emmett said, closing the book and looking down lovingly at the newest member of the family.

She was tucked in, as comfortable as a bug in a rug… or however that saying went.

Terra shook her head, her shiny black curls bounced around her pale cherub face. Her large brown eyes shined up at him, suspicious. "Uncle Emmy…mommy and daddy said that you would tell me this. And that I shouldn't believe you when you did. Daddy isn't the big bad wolf."

Although the little girl was only a year old, she was already advanced just like her mother had been when she was born. Emmett hated that.

"Emmett get down here RIGHT now!" He could hear both Rosalie and Renesmee yell together.

He grinned down at the little girl.

"Goodnight Sweet-pea"

So... Hope you liked :)

Happy Friday!