The last set of lyric and the last dialogue was extremely hard to do, and I'm thankful that I finally thought of something.
It takes place when Ralph and Vanellope go to Vanellope's home and when she talks about how bad her life is. The song is entitled, "One of the Joys of Being Me", based on Vanellope's line, which I got the idea from. The song is not bouncy like "It Sucks to Be Me for Avenue Q", but rather a really slow, beautiful melody. Think "All Good Gifts" from Godspell and "Alone in the Universe" from Seussical. Here it is!
One of the Joys Being Me
Vanellope:
Welcome my home! I sleep in these candy wrappers.
(wraps herself in one)
I bundle myself up like a little homeless lady…
RALPH
By yourself, with all this garbage around you?
VANELLOPE
Well, yeah. I mean everyone here says I'm just a mistake, and that I wasn't even supposed to exist. What do you expect?
(music starts)
RALPH
Listen, kid… I know it's none of my business, but why do you even stick around this game?
VANELLOPE
You really don't know anything, do you? Glitches can't leave their games. It's one of the joys of being me.
Vanellope:
Staying here in this mountain alone,
Timid and scared to be out there,
Because if they ever catch you,
You might as well say a prayer.
You will be locked up and captured,
With not knowing your fate.
Finding out if you'll be eventually let go.
Or realizing your mistakes too late
People target you because you're a glitch.
Laughed at, and scoffed at, and yelled at.
They take away your dreams and stop you,
By humiliating you and beating you up.
What's wrong with that?
You just want to leave the game and be free,
And have a great life where you can do anything.
And everyone loves you.
But, you're a glitch and you're trapped,
Leaving you imprisoned.
It's one of the joys being me.
Vanellope:
And you know another joy? Not knowing your past.
Ralph:
What? That's impossible. Everyone is programmed with a back-story.
Vanellope:
I know!
Ralph:
How can you possibly not remember yours?
Vanellope:
I SERIOUSLY don't know. Everything is a blur literally. Every time I go to the race track, I start remembering things, but it's so blurry. So, that's one of the reasons why I want to race. To finally know who I am. I KNOW there's a reason why I am a glitch, Ralph! And I have a feeling that King Big Nose has something to do with it.
Ralph:
Well, besides the back story part, I know EXACTLY how you feel.
Vanellope:
You do?
Ralph:
Being hated because you are a villain,
And they know that you can't change.
They all understand this and they don't care,
Isn't that strange?
You can't be in a room without a stare.
Yelling, booing, or hissing.
You try to be good, you try to be gentle,
And try to say what's missing.
Alone outside in a dump,
Literally living on a hill of bricks.
Cold and not respected, and ignored.
Knowing that you're not the part of the clique
You just want to be welcomed and be full of glee,
And have a great life where you are treasured.
And everyone loves you.
But, you're a villain and you're hated,
Leaving you depressed.
It's one of the joys being me.
Vanellope:
Wow, I never know how tough you have it.
Ralph:
Mmm hmm.
Vanellope:
And I never met someone…who goes through the same things that I do.
Vanellope/Ralph:
I'm tired of being an outcast,
Shammed and disgraced.
Tired of running and hiding,
When people see your face.
They don't know anything about me,
And they won't give me a chance
They need to see past through my code,
And give me a better glance
Ralph:
You can do great things,
More than you can ever know.
Vanellope:
But, you don't succeed because
Because people won't let you so
Vanellope/Ralph:
And if they eventually give into my pleas,
They will see a different character.
And they can help me find
One of the joys of being me
Ralph:
So, we're a lot similar than we thought, huh?
Vanellope:
I guess that we really have to get to know each other before judging.
And you ACTUALLY have to live on bricks?
Ralph:
Yup, the Nicelanders won't let me live in the apartment, so I have to live outside. Unhygienic. And lonely. And boring. But, that medal was gonna change all that. I go home with that baby around my neck, and I'll get a penthouse. Pies. Ice sculptures.
Fireworks…
…Ah, it's grown up stuff. You wouldn't understand.
VANELLOPE:
(excited)
No, I get it. That's exactly what racing would also do for me.
Ralph:
By the way, I saw the racers, tearing apart "Lickity Split." That was so harsh. They're meaner to you than the Nicelanders are to me. They just throw me off buildings and not let me into the warm rooms while the racers tear apart your kart and push you around.
Vanellope:
(chuckles)
Throwing you off buildings? That's a lot harsher than tearing apart my kart!
*pokes at him, Ralph chuckles*
Oh, and Ralph? Thank you for standing up for me earlier on. That's the only nice thing anyone has ever done for me. Plus…
(starts to laugh and whispers)
I think I heard Taffya, screaming the loudest.
(Mimics her scream and the two laugh)
Ralph:
(smiles)
No prob, gumdrop. Anytime the racers bug you again, let me know.
(winks at her)
Vanellope:
(laughs)
And if the Nicelanders ever try to throw you off a building again, I'll be all glitching at them. Well, if I could leave the game anyway, I would.
Ralph:
(laughs)
You know? I think we got on the wrong foot.
Vanellope:
Yeah, let's restart.
Ralph:
(offers his hand)
I'm Wreck-It Ralph from the game Fix-It Felix Jr.
Vanellope:
(shakes it)
And I'm Vanellope von Schweetz from Sugar Rush
Vanellope/Ralph:
Finally, I am not alone!
I have someone who understands
The way that I do and
Someone who offers me their hand.
I finally have a person
that I can be myself
Someone who I can hang with and talk to,
And won't leave me on the shelf
She/he will always be there for me,
And our closeness won't have an end.
Finally, I have a another me, and
An actual friend.
Ralph:
I just found finally found that
Vanellope:
I just finally see that
Vanellope/Ralph:
A real friend like you
Is a joy of being me.
It's one of the joys being me. (5x)
(As the music slows down and ends, they hug)