Title: Trick Or Treat
Author: Star Tracer
Rating: G
Class: Humor (hopefully!)
Spoilers: Just a teeny, tiny one for Chinga.
Archive: Any where, just drop me a line.
Disclaimer: M&S are not mine. But I doubt CC would want to claim them in *this* story. Hey, *somebody's got to let them have fun! Chrissie Hynde also belongs to someone other than me.
Summary: Mulder, Scully, Xena and Hercules costumes...oh yeah, and some killer bear-shaped lollipops...don't forget a special apperance by...KIERA! ****
It was Halloween.
And Dana Scully was working.
Well, she was getting paid, but what she was doing couldn't actually be constituted as work. She had sharpened a box of pencils and was now throwing them up at the ceiling trying to get them to stick.
They weren't.
She glanced at her watch. Only 10.13!
God, she was bored.
Giving up on the pencils, she pushed a tape into the tape deck and pressed 'play'.
Chrissie Hynde's voice came blasting out of the speakers.
"Oooo!" she squealed. "I love this song!"
Stopping the tape, she rewound the song to the beginning and, grabbing Mulder's hairbrush, began singing along with the tape.
She was singing so loudly that she didn't hear the door open.
She didn't even know that someone was in the room until a decidedly male voice started singing.
She yelped and spun round, nearly falling. "Mulder!" she screamed, throwing herself into his arms. "I'm so glad to see you!"
He raised an eyebrow.
"I was *so* bored! And Frohike kept calling and calling and he wouldn't leave me alone!" she indicated the office phone, which
was presently off the hook. "So I just never hung it back up again. Where were you, anyway?" she finished, noticing the bag he
clutched in his hand. "Did you get me something?"
"You know today's Halloween, right?"
"Duh!"
"Well..." he set down the bag and pulled out a box. "I got us costumes!"
"Costumes?"
"Yeah! We're going trick-or-treating!"
"Trick-or-treating? Where?"
"Here!" he replied, in a 'duh' voice.
"Okay! What'd you get me? What'd you get me?"
"You are.....Xena: Warrior Princess!"
Scully squealed in delight and clapped her hands, dancing around Mulder, happily.
"I get to be Xena, I get to be Xena, I get to be Xena." she sang.
"And I'm Hercules."
That stopped her. She halted in mid-skip, nearly falling down, then whirled round and faced him.
"You can't be Hercules."
He put his hands on his hips. "Why not?"
She poked him in the chest. "Cos I say so."
"So? Who are you?"
"I'm Xena: Warrior Princess and you are *not* Hercules!"
"I am too."
"You are not."
"I am too!"
"You are not!"
"Am too!"
"Are not!"
"Am too!!"
"Are not!!"
"AM TOO!"
Scully stood on her tip-toes and screamed as loud as she could (which happened to be pretty loud): "*ARE NOT*!"
Mulder folded his arms over his chest and pouted. "If I can't be Hercules, then *you* can't be Xena!"
That stumped her. "Well, then, who will I be?"
He shrugged. "Who will *I* be?"
"You can be...you can be....you can be an FBI Agent!." she beamed at him, proud of herself.
He frowned. "That's stupid."
"Is not."
"It too."
"Is not!"
"Is too!"
"IS NOT!"
"IS TOO!"
"Well, if it's so stupid, then *you* come up with something better."
That stumped *him*. "I can be....Hercules!"
"Okay!"
Mulder was pleased with his small victory. That is, until Scully started practising her Xena kicks.
When she kicked his leg, he screamed a girly scream and leapt onto his desk. "Scully." he complained.
She shook her head. "There is no Scully! Only Xena: Warrior Princess!"
"Okay, fine *Xena*, then!"
She struck a super hero pose. "Yes, Hercules, my faithful sidekick, what is it?"
"Hercules isn't Xena's sidekick."
She dropped her arms to her sides. "So? We'll *pretend* he is."
"Nu-uh." Mulder had ventured down from the safety of his desk. "I would never be your sidekick."
Scully let out a Xena: Warrior Princess scream and leapt at Mulder. Mulder jumped back onto his desk with a girly shriek.
"Scully - er, Xena!"
"I'm not talking to you." Scully folded her arms across her chest and turned away from him.
"Scully."
She made a little sniffley noise to indicate her sadness.
"Ah, Scully." he climbed down from the desk and placed a hand on her shoulder. "I'm sorry."
There was no response.
"Scully, I said I was sorry."
She turned slowly, then suddenly without warning, she grabbed his arm and yanked and he ended up on the floor, flat on his
back, with her standing beside him, one foot placed triumphantly on his chest.
He regarded her. "Uh, Scully?"
She shook her head, slightly.
"Fine, uh, Xena?"
"What, mortal?"
He opened his mouth to remind her that Hercules wasn't a mortal, but decided against it. "I can see up your skirt."
She blushed, and swept away from him.
"Ha, ha!" he crowed, happily. "I made you blush and it wasn't even true!"
Scully let loose a Xena: Warrior Princess War Cry and commenced chasing Mulder around the office.
**53 MINUTES LATER**
Scully, having resolved her anger with Mulder via a giant foam bat, was now happily dressed in
her Xena: Warrior Princess costume and waiting for Mulder to finish dressing.
Suddenly, there was an knock at the door. Scully opened it up to see ......Kiera!
"Hi, Scully. Uh...why are you dressed like Xena: Warrior Princess?"
"Cos I *am* Xena: Warrior Princess."
"Um, okay. Uh, Scully - "
"Xena." Scully corrected.
"Xena. I need your help."
"Yes, Kiera, my worthy follower. How may I help you?"
Kiera glanced around, nervously. "You know those bear-shaped lollipops?"
"Yes! Xena: Warrior Princess loves them,"
"Okay, well, they're stalking me."
"Stalking you?"
"Yes. They came to life and they want to kill me ."
"Kill you? Bear-shaped lollipops want to kill you?"
Kiera nodded, empathetically. "Yeah!"
"Kiera....did you forget to take your medication again?"
Kiera slapped herself on the forehead. "Yes! I *knew* there was something I forgot!"
"Well, you're in luck. We always have some extra Kiera medication around." Scully disappeared around the door and reappeared holding the Kiera medication.
"Oh thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou." Kiera downed two pills and returned the container to Scully. "Thank you."
"No problem." Scully smiled and gently closed the door.
No more than three seconds later, Scully heard a scream and threw open the door. Kiera lay sprawled on the floor - dead - with those little bear- shaped lollipops all over her.
Scully blinked, shook her head, downed two of Kiera's pills and closed the office door.
***
THE END
......for now..... :-) BWA-HA-HA-HA-HA!!!!!
Didn't that make you feel all warm and squishy? Sort of like...strained carrots???
Author: Star Tracer
Rating: G
Class: Humor (hopefully!)
Spoilers: Just a teeny, tiny one for Chinga.
Archive: Any where, just drop me a line.
Disclaimer: M&S are not mine. But I doubt CC would want to claim them in *this* story. Hey, *somebody's got to let them have fun! Chrissie Hynde also belongs to someone other than me.
Summary: Mulder, Scully, Xena and Hercules costumes...oh yeah, and some killer bear-shaped lollipops...don't forget a special apperance by...KIERA! ****
It was Halloween.
And Dana Scully was working.
Well, she was getting paid, but what she was doing couldn't actually be constituted as work. She had sharpened a box of pencils and was now throwing them up at the ceiling trying to get them to stick.
They weren't.
She glanced at her watch. Only 10.13!
God, she was bored.
Giving up on the pencils, she pushed a tape into the tape deck and pressed 'play'.
Chrissie Hynde's voice came blasting out of the speakers.
"Oooo!" she squealed. "I love this song!"
Stopping the tape, she rewound the song to the beginning and, grabbing Mulder's hairbrush, began singing along with the tape.
She was singing so loudly that she didn't hear the door open.
She didn't even know that someone was in the room until a decidedly male voice started singing.
She yelped and spun round, nearly falling. "Mulder!" she screamed, throwing herself into his arms. "I'm so glad to see you!"
He raised an eyebrow.
"I was *so* bored! And Frohike kept calling and calling and he wouldn't leave me alone!" she indicated the office phone, which
was presently off the hook. "So I just never hung it back up again. Where were you, anyway?" she finished, noticing the bag he
clutched in his hand. "Did you get me something?"
"You know today's Halloween, right?"
"Duh!"
"Well..." he set down the bag and pulled out a box. "I got us costumes!"
"Costumes?"
"Yeah! We're going trick-or-treating!"
"Trick-or-treating? Where?"
"Here!" he replied, in a 'duh' voice.
"Okay! What'd you get me? What'd you get me?"
"You are.....Xena: Warrior Princess!"
Scully squealed in delight and clapped her hands, dancing around Mulder, happily.
"I get to be Xena, I get to be Xena, I get to be Xena." she sang.
"And I'm Hercules."
That stopped her. She halted in mid-skip, nearly falling down, then whirled round and faced him.
"You can't be Hercules."
He put his hands on his hips. "Why not?"
She poked him in the chest. "Cos I say so."
"So? Who are you?"
"I'm Xena: Warrior Princess and you are *not* Hercules!"
"I am too."
"You are not."
"I am too!"
"You are not!"
"Am too!"
"Are not!"
"Am too!!"
"Are not!!"
"AM TOO!"
Scully stood on her tip-toes and screamed as loud as she could (which happened to be pretty loud): "*ARE NOT*!"
Mulder folded his arms over his chest and pouted. "If I can't be Hercules, then *you* can't be Xena!"
That stumped her. "Well, then, who will I be?"
He shrugged. "Who will *I* be?"
"You can be...you can be....you can be an FBI Agent!." she beamed at him, proud of herself.
He frowned. "That's stupid."
"Is not."
"It too."
"Is not!"
"Is too!"
"IS NOT!"
"IS TOO!"
"Well, if it's so stupid, then *you* come up with something better."
That stumped *him*. "I can be....Hercules!"
"Okay!"
Mulder was pleased with his small victory. That is, until Scully started practising her Xena kicks.
When she kicked his leg, he screamed a girly scream and leapt onto his desk. "Scully." he complained.
She shook her head. "There is no Scully! Only Xena: Warrior Princess!"
"Okay, fine *Xena*, then!"
She struck a super hero pose. "Yes, Hercules, my faithful sidekick, what is it?"
"Hercules isn't Xena's sidekick."
She dropped her arms to her sides. "So? We'll *pretend* he is."
"Nu-uh." Mulder had ventured down from the safety of his desk. "I would never be your sidekick."
Scully let out a Xena: Warrior Princess scream and leapt at Mulder. Mulder jumped back onto his desk with a girly shriek.
"Scully - er, Xena!"
"I'm not talking to you." Scully folded her arms across her chest and turned away from him.
"Scully."
She made a little sniffley noise to indicate her sadness.
"Ah, Scully." he climbed down from the desk and placed a hand on her shoulder. "I'm sorry."
There was no response.
"Scully, I said I was sorry."
She turned slowly, then suddenly without warning, she grabbed his arm and yanked and he ended up on the floor, flat on his
back, with her standing beside him, one foot placed triumphantly on his chest.
He regarded her. "Uh, Scully?"
She shook her head, slightly.
"Fine, uh, Xena?"
"What, mortal?"
He opened his mouth to remind her that Hercules wasn't a mortal, but decided against it. "I can see up your skirt."
She blushed, and swept away from him.
"Ha, ha!" he crowed, happily. "I made you blush and it wasn't even true!"
Scully let loose a Xena: Warrior Princess War Cry and commenced chasing Mulder around the office.
**53 MINUTES LATER**
Scully, having resolved her anger with Mulder via a giant foam bat, was now happily dressed in
her Xena: Warrior Princess costume and waiting for Mulder to finish dressing.
Suddenly, there was an knock at the door. Scully opened it up to see ......Kiera!
"Hi, Scully. Uh...why are you dressed like Xena: Warrior Princess?"
"Cos I *am* Xena: Warrior Princess."
"Um, okay. Uh, Scully - "
"Xena." Scully corrected.
"Xena. I need your help."
"Yes, Kiera, my worthy follower. How may I help you?"
Kiera glanced around, nervously. "You know those bear-shaped lollipops?"
"Yes! Xena: Warrior Princess loves them,"
"Okay, well, they're stalking me."
"Stalking you?"
"Yes. They came to life and they want to kill me ."
"Kill you? Bear-shaped lollipops want to kill you?"
Kiera nodded, empathetically. "Yeah!"
"Kiera....did you forget to take your medication again?"
Kiera slapped herself on the forehead. "Yes! I *knew* there was something I forgot!"
"Well, you're in luck. We always have some extra Kiera medication around." Scully disappeared around the door and reappeared holding the Kiera medication.
"Oh thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou." Kiera downed two pills and returned the container to Scully. "Thank you."
"No problem." Scully smiled and gently closed the door.
No more than three seconds later, Scully heard a scream and threw open the door. Kiera lay sprawled on the floor - dead - with those little bear- shaped lollipops all over her.
Scully blinked, shook her head, downed two of Kiera's pills and closed the office door.
***
THE END
......for now..... :-) BWA-HA-HA-HA-HA!!!!!
Didn't that make you feel all warm and squishy? Sort of like...strained carrots???