Chapter One.

There is something uniquely serene about watching a newborn sleep, so peaceful and calm. The slow rise and fall of their chest, the little puffs of air that escape their mouths with every breath that they take. The way their hands are curled into tiny little fists that instinctually grasp onto anything put near them.

Kate Beckett was probably going to miss this part the most when she returned to work at the precinct. Sitting by her sons crib during his daily naps and just watching him. He was her miracle, a surprise, yes, but still a miracle none the less and at six weeks old she was facing the dilemma a lot of new mothers faced - having to return to work. For Kate that meant back to the twelfth, back with the boys, back to the bodies and back to making the world a safer place for her son.

"Has he passed out?" she turned to see Castle leaning against the doorway of the nursery.

"Yeah, about fifteen minutes ago, I was just..." she turned back to gaze down at her son.

"Watching him, I know. " He quietly walked into the room and joined her staring down into the crib at their son.

"I used to do exactly the same thing with Alexis, and I still do it with him as well. There is something so amazing about them, I don't know how to explain it." He whispered.

"I don't know how I am going to leave him for eight or more hours a day, Castle," she breathed softly. "I haven't even left him alone for more than three hours since he was born."

"The first few days are the hardest. Actually no, that's not true, everyday it's hard to leave, but it does get easier... besides someone has to be the breadwinner of this family." He gently tugged at her waist and pulled her into his chest.

"That is very true, I mean the famous novelist Richard Castle hasn't released a new novel in over a year, things are getting a little tight." She gave him a mischievous grin.

He gently tickled her back. "Well, someone kind of disrupted my writing time by you know, getting pregnant, moving in with me, and then bringing the best distraction ever into the world."

"Castle, you played a pretty big part in disrupting yourself you know. It does take two to tango."

At that moment, the peacefully sleeping baby let out a tiny squeak and gurgle, and Kate reached into the crib to place the pacifier into his mouth and he immediately settled back to sleep. Castle reached in to stroke the dark hair on his sleeping sons head.

"Best outcome of any Tango I ever did," He whispered "We better head down and get ready, the first interview is at one o'clock." Kate continued to gaze at her son.

"Do you really think we need a nanny? I mean, between your mom, Alexis, my dad, Jenny and Ryan, Lanie and Esposito - there are plenty of people to help look after him."

Castle took her by the hand and lead her out of the door gently closing it behind her.

"We've had this discussion over and over again Kate, I know you're not overly pleased with the idea, but how about we just meet some of these people, get a feel for them and how they might fit into our family and make a decision from there."

Their family.

Sometimes he had to stop and check to make sure that he was actually awake and it wasn't all part of the best dream he had ever had. When he had turned up at the precinct that morning in June with a coffee in hand and she immediately refused it- he knew something wasn't right. When she texted him a photo of a positive pregnancy test from the women's bathroom at the precinct after a revealing conversation with Lanie an hour later- while he was in the middle of dissecting the case by staring at the murder board- he dropped his phone to the floor gaining odd looks from the boys.

They continued to give him incredulous stares as he mumbled something about the women's bathroom and headed in that general direction. He found Kate still hiding in the stall, sitting on the edge of the toilet, staring at the stick- unmoving, with a few stray tears on her cheeks. When she looked up at him, and realisation hit that it wasn't a joke and it was actually real, he pulled her up and nearly crushed her in a hug, whilst kissing the side of her face. When he let go and she pulled back, she had the biggest smile he had ever seen on her face and he knew in that moment that this is something she wanted.

No it wasn't planned, they were sort of, kind of engaged- meaning they decided that there were going to get married one day, she had a ring, but when was left up to Kate- and they were pretty well living together. Meaning everything of Kate's was at his loft, but she still had her apartment- just for storage. They had talked about having children one day, Kate wanted to at least get through her Detective Sergeant exams, actually get married and then try for a baby. But a dose of stomach flu and antibiotics consipred against their planning.

Her OB/GYN confirmed it three days later, they announced it to their families two days later and announced it to their friends and the world three months later. Kate was on desk duty from October and wasn't happy about it- but knew she had to put her baby ahead of her career. During a massive snow storm at the end of January her water broke at midnight, and by news hour the next day after a drug free labour, she was holding their son.

Noah James Castle.

Seven pounds, eight ounces, grey eyes and a slight covering of dark brown hair.

Perfection.

Castle had raised the idea of hiring a nanny a few times throughout the pregnancy, but each time she dismissed him by saying that she wasn't going back to work anytime soon, she was fine with desk duty and they had a huge support network who could help look after the baby. Then they brought him home, and the sleepless nights took their toll on them, and a serial killer started to take his toll on New York.

Gates asked both of them to review the cases to see if they had any unique insights that they might have missed and Kate got that feeling in her stomach. She got that itch in her hands. She had that voice in the back of head saying - 'what if you could solve this?' It all meant she and Castle decided that it was best if she went back to work. She had to solve this case, before more innocent girls lost their lives in horrific ways. Which lead them to Nanny agency, a list of candidates and now the interview process.

"I know it makes sense on paper, but I just don't know if I can leave him with a complete stranger." Kate spoke with a determination in her voice.

As they made their way downstairs to their bedroom, Kate flicked on the baby monitor sitting on the kitchen bench and checked on the screen that Noah was still sleeping soundly.

He knew that this was difficult for Kate, but he really thought that it would be the best thing for them. Not only did it mean that she could go back to work knowing that her son was being well looked after, but it also meant he could still go to work with her, still escape to write- because he REALLY did need to get the next Nikki Heat out- but they could do it without feeling guilty that they were "dumping" their son on their family members.

When he and Meredith had Alexis, financially they weren't in a position to have help, and Castle was home 24/7 so he was able to play stay at home dad with very little adjustment. But this time it was different.

Kate needed to go back work. He needed to get his book out - his advance was tied up in the nursery upstairs- Alexis was in her senior year at College, Martha was performing on Broadway six nights a week and Jim had just entered a phasing down heading to retirement.

"The point of interviewing them is so that they are no longer complete strangers, and if they can survive a grilling from a detective in the NYPD then they are probably the perfect person for the job. Also you have the best access we can get to do background checks, so I feel rather confident in saying that we are probably going to have one of the best nannies out there!" He gave her that cheeky smile that she knew their son had already inherited.

Kate stepped into the closet taking in the words her partner has just said.

"Okay, but I am not making any promises here. If I don't feel comfortable with any of these girls then the decision is made that I just won't go back to work until he is in preschool." She sorted through her clothes looking for something to wear and she could have sworn she heard a 'yeah right' come from the bathroom.

He did have solid reasoning of course, she desperately wanted to help solve the case, arrest the bad guys and have them locked up forever. It was just now, her priorities had changed. If you had of asked the Kate Beckett of five years ago if this is where she would have seen herself, she probably would have told you that she would be well on her way to lieutenant maybe even working for a federal agency.

She was a mom now and that changed things. Including letting an unknown person into your house, into your life and into your family to take care of the most important person to you. What if it all went wrong and something happened to their son?

It was a risk she was not going to take, every single person who wanted this job was going to find out just how just what it was like to be in the spotlight of an NYPD Detective.

"Good luck to them" she quietly whispered to herself.