Dear Journal,
I lied.
No, wait. That's not right. I meant to say:
I am the lie.
Yeah, I know. You don't know what I'm talking about. Heh. I guess I'm a better liar than I thought. Even though I keep telling myself it's not true, it's merely a vain attempt on my part to deny what is really true.
I am not who I say I am. I am not what I say I am. I am not a Child of the Light, nor am I the Keyblade Master that delivers the Light to the people besieged by Darkness. No. That's all a lie. A big fat lie.
My very existence is a fucking lie.
I am not Sora. I am not Roxas.
I am a Heartless with a Heart not my own.
This Heart that's glowing in my chest doesn't belong to me. It belongs to a Noble Keyblade Master named Ventus. This is what I know from trying to become a powerful Keyblade Master by communing with this Heart:
He was fighting this guy that looked like an older version of Xemnas and -my God- the guy was practically a god on the battlefield. There was no touching him! With each strike that was swung at him, he countered with powerful spells that DID hit.
I don't know what happened to Aqua or Terra, but I know Ventus was defeated and lost his Heart. And the moment his Heart left, his Heartless appeared. His Heartless looks an awful lot like my Anti Form. Thing is, his Keyblade didn't like that, so it used the power of the Light to insert his Heart into my Heartless form. Then it somehow turned ME the Heartless into ME the Something.
A Child of a dimmed Light. And let this be known that the only reason why the Keyblade even STAYS with me is because of Ven's Heart. It simply won't go to anyone else anymore. Not even Riku, who really deserves it. Not me, a freak of Dark nature.
I really am sorry that I lied to everyone. To you. To Riku and Kairi. To Leon, Yuffie, Cid, Aerith, Merlin, and everyone in Radiant Gardens. To everyone I ever met and talked to. I didn't know until recently that I even WAS a Heartless.
If I had known…what would I change? Probably nothing. Yeah. Nothing at all. Save Worlds, save friends, save everyone but me. But hey, I wouldn't be Sora if I didn't…Wait. VENTUS would do all of that. I shouldn't even be here.
Aw hell. I feel a migraine coming on. I'm going to get some pills and decide if I want anyone to read this paper or not. If anyone found out…I think the headache would be the least of my problems. Well, I'm signing off now.
Sora, the Dark Freak.