A/N I don't owe anything, and this is my first fic ever, please let me know what you all think please.
Chapter One
Tara lay on her back in her bed absent mildly rubbing her hand over her growing baby bump. Its been a month since Jax was hauled away in the back of an ATF van, its been a month since she has seen him. He had visitation every Saturday but Tara couldn't bring herself to go there yet. How do you look at the love of your life and not tell him his father died believing his wife, Jax's mother, and his best friend killed him? Especially when he's in prison with the man who was in on the kill. Tara didn't want anything to jeopardize Jax coming home to her and their kids, and her knowing Jax top to bottom, knows he would kill Clay if there was any truth in John's letters. She also knew herself, and she's awful at keeping secrets from Jax. He could look right through her. So Tara avoided Jax. When she could figure out a way to look at him without blurting on the letters, she would visit him.
The first two weeks Tara said she couldn't be spared from the hospital, it was too short staffed. These last two weeks Tara couldn't make it because one Saturday was the Taste of Charming fundraiser that she was in charge of with Gemma on house arrest. And the last Saturday Tara had to go visit Nate at the retirement home, he was having some blood pressure issues and they needed his power of attorney to make some medical decisions. She still wrote him at least two letters a week and told him she loves him, but Jax was starting to feel worried and anxious. Its been a month since he had seen her. Wasn't she missing him? Didn't she think it would make him feel so much better to just look into her eyes, to see for himself that her and the baby were ok? Seriously fuck! She was held with a knife against her throat not that long ago. Every week he went down to the visiting room hoping to see Tara would show, but every week Opie or Chibs came instead.
"Ope, how's Tara doing?" "She's ok, I can tell she's holding stuff in, she seems distracted most the time. But what do you expect? She's been through hell and back in the last couple months." "yeah", was all Jax said in response. " What's on your mind man?" "I don't know. In Gemma's last letter she said she barely sees Tara, Neeta's usually the one running Able back and forth. I guess im just worried Tara's distancing herself from everyone, you know like slipping away…" his voice trailed off. "Jax, Taras not slipping away. She's been over at my house a lot lately. Shes been helping Lyla plan wedding stuff and watching the kids so Lyla and I can go out. She was at the clubhouse the other night cause she knew it was fight night and figured someone would end up needing stitches. My guess would be that Tara doesn't want to deal with Gemma telling her how to be queen bee. Tara made a joke a couple weeks ago about how Gemma'll probably hired spies to photograph shit at the Taste of Charming fundraiser so she could tell Tara what she fucked up." Jax chuckled at that, it honestly wasn't that far fetched of an idea. " God I hope that's it, because I cant top thinking she's gonna be half way around the world by the time I get out of here," Jax finished by putting his head in his hands and heaving a deep sigh. Opie reached over and tapped Jax's elbow, when Jax looked up and looked in Opies eye, Opie continues "Tara walked in on you and Ima, you told her she wasn't family, then she was held hostage, and lastly she transported an international criminal for us. She isn't going anywhere man, she wouldn't go through all of that and then ditch cause you're in prison. You do not have anything to worry about brother."
Jax was back in his cell. He was pretty lucky his cellmate was a member f the Grim Bastards and pretty much kept to himself, his name was Jerome. Jax decided to write Tara a letter. Hey babe, I miss you so much. Its becoming unbearable and its only been a month. I really wish you could get up here soon. You have no idea how badly I need to touch your soft skin, see your amazing smile, and breath you in. You and the babies are the only thing keeping me sane in here. I cant wait to see you chubby! I've known you since we were 16 and haven't ever seen you with an ounce of fat of ya darling. If you can make it this weekend please bring pictures of you and Abel. I gotta show you guys off to all the guys in here who have never seen the most beautiful women in the world. :P
I love you, totally, completely, unconditionally
Jackson