An: So here's my new story. It's kinda dark, but I don't feel it is 100% of the time. Thanks Vivi for pushing me to do this, although all you said was, "you don't need me why did you ask?" LOL. I needed something new, I'm boring myself. And I feel like I'm boring all of you. I hope you guys take to this story. My original idea was to have Serena's college roommate killed and Serena saw the whole thing and had to recover but then a few things didn't work out as I planned them out. Hopefully this idea sticks. If anything I could write my first idea if people ask me to. Please Review. I need to know whether or not to stick with this one.

Serena sat on her kitchen floor, with an ice pack in one hand and dry blood on the other. She slowly started to regain the feeling in her left cheek. She felt the bump on her face and winced in agony. Her fingers felt the familiar bruises. A voice in her head tried to calm her down, but nothing worked. She put her hand up against the sink and finally managed to stand. When she felt herself begin to slide again, she reached for a chair. She heard the door open and braced herself for the aftermath.

"Hey baby." He extended his hand with a dozen roses.

"Hi."

"Look, I'm sorry." He pulled a chair next to her.

"I know." Serena spoke the words knowing she's said them a thousand times.

"It's just when you told me that you were going, I didn't realize you meant to visit your mom."

"I should of been more clear." Serena tried to end the conversation.

"You really should. I don't want this to happen next time." He grinned.

"I just have therapy this afternoon, then catching a train home."

"You really think you should leave in this condition? And why are you still seeing this lame shrink."

"It's court ordered. The judge wanted me to see a shrink after what happened with my family." Was the lie Serena playful told.

"What am I going to do for a week without you?"

"It might be two if my grandma's health is that bad."

"Two weeks? I dunno."

"I'll call you everyday."

"Fine. I'll just miss you baby." He kissed her check. Serena gave a half smile.

She took the roses from his hand and gave them a quick smell. She smiled, thinking this time she finally made it through a morning. Last nights hit left her in that kitchen all night. He stormed off to some bar and probably picked up some random chick, who then threw a drink in his face. She took a vase from the cabinet. Holding it in her hand made her remember the time he broke two vases. He was so drunk that night. He came home to find Serena missing, when really she just had a late night at work. When she got home, all hell broke lose. But she'd rather forget that night.

She did her best to cover up the small bruises on her face. The bigger ones were hidden beneath clothing. He rarely went for her face. If he went for her face too often, people would start to ask questions. She got in her car and was off to therapy. The one place she didn't mind going, when she controlled the conversation.

The waiting room smelt a bit musky. It was hard to determine and exact odor. Serena picked a part random things like this all the time. It kept her sane. She made sure that she was the only appointment that Dr. Berkmen had. She hated people seeing her in therapy. She dreaded seeing someone that might know her or even her family. She couldn't take the risk of that. She needed privacy.

"Serena, I'm ready for you."

"Thank you so much for changing the appointment."

"It's fine." The tall woman replied as she sat in her chair.

"I'm going home to see my family, like you suggested."

"Serena, I've know you for two months, and in that time I've learned nothing about you. Other than stuff with your mother and Blair."

"That's all you need to know, really."

"Clearly, you've rehearsed this."

"What?"

"The most common trait of abusive relationships forces the women to talk only about the ill fate of her family. Get as far away from the boyfriend subject as possible."

"I am not in..."

"Save it, that bruise can be seen from space. I won't tell. I can't."

"It's not like that. I love him."

"I know you do, they always do." Dr. Berkmen wished she could snap sense into Serena.

"I'm not some textbook case. He has a very stressful job and I only add to it."

"What was the first argument you two had? Before the fists."

"Jake saw me with an ex and thought it meant more. After that he stopped trusting me and started drinking."

"How many times has he hit you?"

"Three. But one time it wasn't really hitting. He pulled my hair and I jerked back into the wall."

"Has he ever tried going for the face before."

"No. This time I tried to fight back so he grabbed my face."

"Now, hearing yourself say this does nothing? It doesn't want to make you leave?"

"I'm not strong enough to leave. I lost my best friend. There's no one left on my side."

"Blair left after you refused to leave Jake?"

"She said she'd go to the cops or blackmail him, but it only made it worse. That was the worst beating I took."

"And your parents? Your step family?"

"It's better they stay out of it. I've been living in Connecticut for two years now. They don't know anything."

"I want you to try something when you're in New York. Find something that makes you feel safe. It can be a place, a thing, a person, something that's just for you. Find that something that will give you hope. I want you to hold onto it. So the next time you come back and see Jake, you will have something to look forward to. You are not helpless Serena. I don't know why you stay with this man. Report back to me when you get home."

"Thank you Doctor." Serena nodded and got up from the couch.

"Remember Serena, it doesn't have to be this way." Dr. Berkmen yelled to get Serena's attention.

It doesn't have to be this way? Yeah, okay. Serena thought to herself. She kept an ice pack on her face the whole ride in so that the swelling would go down. They always make it seem like it's that much easier to leave. She couldn't leave him, he needed her. He was there for her when she needed someone the most. When she left New York to attend something for her boarding school she got into a bad car accident. Her friend was driving and was killed by a drunk driver. When Serena was in the hospital Jake's grandma was her roommate. The two spoke everyday. Lily visited a few times, but had to deal with her own sickness. Even when Jake's grandma was released he still visited Serena. He sat with her the five hours she was allowed visitors and they talked about everything. They slowly started to date and even fell in love, but we all know how this story turned out. Blair told Serena she was trapped but Serena refused to believe so. She did love Jake, maybe not like before, but she loved him. All these thoughts encompassed her mind as the train finally came to a stop. She quickly covered her face up before leaving the train. She grabbed her bags for the over head and went into the station. Grand Central Station felt all too weird. It was just a few years ago that she came back and caused all sorts of "havoc." Remembering those times made her happy, if only for a moment.

"Serena?"

Serena turned around to see Dan Humphrey, her ex-boyfriend standing in front of her. The scene felt all too familiar, but nice. It was scary that they would meet again like this.

"Hi, Dan." She replied softly.

"Wow. I never thought you were coming home."

"I had to eventually."

"What happened to your face?" Dan tried to touch the bruise, but Serena backed away.

"You know me, big ole klutz. I ran into a wall or something." Serena felt the red bump she thought went away on her face.

"You want to grab coffee or something? Maybe a steak for your face." Dan laughed.

"I'd like that, but I should check into my hotel first."

"You're not staying with your mom?"

"This was one of those surprise visits." Serena frantically nodded.

"Well, my number is the same. Call me when you want that coffee." Dan smiled and picked up his bags.

Serena watched as her old flame walked away. The words safe were being chanted over and over in her head. He could of pressed the issue of the bruise, like most people would, but he didn't. He knew he had no place asking since he was a fixture in her life for the past two years. But maybe, one day would change all that.