Beevis and Butthead vs. the TARDIS.
Beevis wore his usual Metallica tee-shirt as he sat on the old couch in the living room. His hair towering high above his forehead he sat chuckling endlessly at the lame video that played on his tv. Butthead sat next to him laughing in agreement.
Butthead can barely tear his eyes way from the stupid graphics as the video tried to depict some guy and girl dancing? sing? with a bunch of techno lights and psychedelic colors flashing behind them.
"This video sucks" Butthead didn't even look surprised. He was even starting to lose interest.
"He, he, he, he. Yea this like is all tralalalala.." Beevis started imitating the music horribly.
"He loves her..huhuhuh. Chicks rule. I would be like come here babe. Lets do it."
"No you wouldn't Butthead. You're going to end up like me. I can't get a chick to even look at me" Beevis complained at he looked back at the video
"No I'm not. You just suck!" Butthead accused his buddy on the couch
"Take that back" Beevis started to shake in anger
"Your going to die a virgin." Butthead laughed and mocked Beevis.
"Why you..." Beevis exploded in anger and launched directly for the
Beevis started slapping Butthead in the face leaving red marks on the cheeks. Butthead gets mad of course and throws the first punch of the night and the two start brawling on the couch.
The fight is only over because they hear a weird sound coming from the backyard.
"Did you hear that Butthead." Beevis stops mid punch as the sound directs his attention off beating up his friend.
"Uh..no." The only sound Butthead could hear was the blood rushing to his ears that had gotten more slapped than punched.
Beevis released his grip from Buttheads ACDC shirt and get up. Butthead follows behind laughing because he got in more punches this time. The two make it outside with a side trip to the fridge and find something very strange standing in their yard.
It was a blue box tall square with the words "Police Public Call Box" written in startling white letter across one of the sides. there were two doors and third smaller door on the side. The smaller door read "POLICE TELEPHONE, FREE FOR USE OF PUBLIC, ADVICE & ASSISTANCE OBTAINABLE IMMEDIATELY, OFFICERS & CARS RESPOND TO ALL CALLS, PULL TO OPEN"
Beevis and Butthead walk up to it and stare at it for a while. Butthead steps one step further and tries to read it. "Pull too op end." He pulls on the smaller door and an old looking phone falls out attached to a cord. It dangles there a moment.
Beevis gets an idea to pick up the phone
"Hello? Did you know your refrigerator is running." he laughs at his own joke "You better catch it! Hello? Hello?" he drops the phone. "That's stupid it don't work."
They stare at it for a bit longer.
"This thing might belong to the cops" Butthead observed.
"Then what's it doing here?" And with out further thought Beevis laughs at the stupidity of the cops for leaving here anyway.
"You still have those fireworks?" Butthead asked
"Yea!" Beeis laughed at the sheer brilliance of the idea and runs to get them. Butthead is not far behind.
In the garage Beevis is climbing on top of some boxes to get at some old mortars that were left over from a long ago 4th of July.
"Huhuhuh...Your going to break your neck. Dumbass."
"Then help dorkface, catch." Beevis drops a box from where he was and almost beans Butthead in the forehead."
"Watch it duffus you almost killed me." He ungently picks up the box of fireworks and hold them as Beevis comes back down with a smaller box. Inside was full of M80's . cheery bombs. The larger box had what looked a couple sticks of dynamite.
"This is going to rule" Beevis gleefully said as he started thinking about the sheer destruction that was about to be unleashed on the mysterious box that now sat in their territory.
They sat down the boxes and began to make their plans.
At first they tried to explode one of the more colorful mortars. lots of lights and flashes but no damage.
"That sucked."
Shut up Butthead. We haven't even gotten started yet.
The next time the surrounded the strange box with firecrackers and lit them off. The satisfying sound of popping sounded and smoke started rising from the ground. Beevis and Butthead let the smoke clear and saw to their dismay no damage. Not even singe around the edges.
This blows man" Beevis was severely disappointed.
Butthead then smiles. Lets move to the big stuff. All of it.
Beevis laughs. This is going to be good!
They spend the next five minutes getting all the firecrackers and mortars and M80's and two sticks of dynamite underneath the box.
The two marvel at their handy work as Butthead holds the Lighter.
"No way Butthead. My fireworks. My turn"
"No way. You'll burn yourself like you dids last time with the Barbeque. It's my turn."
They started another fight and the lighter that was now lit fell out of Buttheads hand and fell right on the wick.
The boys stopped when they heard the familiar hiss and watched as their masterpiece was about to go up in flames.
The loudest kaboom was heard and felt leaving dogs barking, car alarms screaming and Stuart to wonder what the heck was going on Stuart started to make his way over to the boys' house.
Beevis and Butthead look in awe and disappointed amazement when nothing happened. The Box stood there, Unharmed, unchanged.
This is lame.
Yea this like totally sucks balls. Nothing happened.
Just as they were about to leave the doors to the strange box opened and a man stepped outside. He seemed completely unfazed about what had just occurred. If he even knew in the first place
The man was younge in his late 20's. He was dresses as an old professor would with a bowtie around his neck. He had brunette hair that flopped over to one side. He smiled as he looked at the two that stood before the door.
Hello there. I'm the Doctor. I am looking for someone to travel with me. I have jelly babies and jammie dodgers. perhaps some Fish fingers and custard. MMM that sounds good about now.
"He wants us to come with him in his box"
"Your a perv. get away from us." Now bored of the whole thing Beevis and Butthead walk away.
They pass Stuart "Hey see that box. The man inside wants us to go with him the perv. You go with him.
Stuart looks at the blue box and recognizes it immediately "Really! Really! Your passing it up?"
"Umm..." Beevis laughs "yea go with the Perv"
"That mans a pedophile." accused Butthead
"Thanks guys!" Stuart as fast as his pudgy legs could carry him to the Man with the Blue Box.
"Do you really go in time and space and get into all kinds of adventures?" It was clear Stuart was star struck.
"I sure do. I do try to stay out of trouble." Said the odd British man.
"Can I go with you?" Stuart could barely control his excitement at the prospect,
"Sure." The Doctor stood aside and lets Stuart inside and from inside you could here him said "IT IS BIGGER ON THE INSIDE!" as the doors closed.
The same strange noises came from the box as it disappeared from the back yard, taking Stuart with it.
"Well I guess we will never see him again. Dumbass."
"Yea..." Beevis simply agreeed and started to walk off.
Beevis and Butthead walked down the sidewalk giving the adventure no after though "Lets go to the KwikiMart. I need some nachos."